#274: Defensiveness is a protective mechanism embedded in our evolutionary history that we can be grateful for, but it can also be painful to you and those you’re in relationship with. What can you do to step out of this deeply ingrained habit?

Tune in this week to learn where defensiveness stems from and how to cultivate patience and compassion towards yourself and others when it shows up. I’m showing you the connection between defensiveness and self-esteem, why thought work often isn’t enough to stop this habit, and my favorite remedies for reducing the impulsivity of your defensive responses.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/274

#273: How often do you find yourself mired in stories filled with past regrets? Thinking about "what could have been" may feel constructive, but on the podcast this week, I'm exploring why these thought patterns don't serve you the way you think they do.

Tune in this week to learn why regret doesn’t change a darn thing, and how living in regret is a form of self-abandonment. You’ll hear how staying stuck in regret doesn’t save you from old patterns, what becomes possible when you ditch regret for good, and most importantly, my four-step remedy for beginning to heal regret. 

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/273

#272: If you find yourself exhausted from overextending yourself, stuck in relationships that feel one-sided, or even helping others in an attempt to ease your own discomfort, it might be time to rethink how you express compassion. This week, I'm offering a new lens through which to examine your actions, which I like to call "misguided compassion." 

Tune in to learn how misguided compassion can highlight our tendencies in emotional outsourcing, but also offer us the opportunity to find balance. You'll learn some common signs you may be engaging in misguided compassion and my favorite remedies for breaking free from it.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/272

#271: If you relate to my definition of emotional outsourcing tendencies, the thought of giving yourself true rest likely hasn’t crossed your mind in a hot minute. But have you ever wondered what it would be like to just call it and decide you’re not going to push through when your internal world is screaming for a break?

Tune in this week to hear the importance of befriending rest and the alternative to pushing through when your brain and body say no. I’m sharing a list of questions you can use to check in with yourself when you hear that internal nudge, and my favorite tools to borrow when you need a break but don’t have the privilege of ignoring your responsibilities.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/271

#270: In a world where codependence and independence are posited as the only two options for how we can show up, you’re not alone if you feel a sense of tension in either way of being. Interdependence offers a healthy middle ground to these extremes, but what does interdependence actually look like, and how do we practice it? 

Tune in to this episode to learn the differences between codependent relating and interdependence, and why interdependence in relationships feels so much better. I’m showing you what interdependence really looks like, both in relationship with yourself and others, and two pieces of homework that will help you begin moving the needle toward interdependence.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/270

#269: There are a lot of things in the world right now that we could tell worried stories around, and our nervous systems jump to worry because they’re here to protect us. But the truth is, worry never accomplishes anything. Taking action, on the other hand, does.

If you want to get out of the habit of worrying and release your nervous system from this uncomfortable feeling, then today’s episode is for you. Tune in for a replay of one of our most valuable episodes where you’ll learn why worrying is always optional and I help you recognize where being stuck in the habit of worrying is holding you back in your life.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/269

#268: If you’ve been doing thought work for a while and have noticed yourself ruminating, or your thoughts moving into the land of self-criticism, you’re not alone. I've been there and so have many of my clients. Today, I want to offer a gentle reminder about the power of reconnecting to our physical bodies in our self development work. 

In this episode, I’m sharing the reasons why our connection with our bodies’ deep intelligence is crucial as we learn to reclaim our presence and regulate our nervous systems. You’ll learn how to rebuild your somatic connection by honoring your biological impulses, and helpful questions to ask yourself to get out of your head and back into your body. 

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/268

#267: Whether you find yourself moving through the world chronically offended, or know someone who does, taking things personally is super exhausting. Feeling criticized hurts, it keeps us out of presence, and it sows discord in all of our relationships. So why then do we do it? And how can we step out of this habit?

Join me this week to hear why you might be in the habit of taking things personally and how to stop. I’m showing you why taking things personally is a common survival tool for emotional outsourcers, how we unwittingly create drama when we take things personally, and remedies that will help you step out of this habit and build a more supportive, loving sense of self.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/267

#266: This week, I’m bringing you a live coaching call with one of my amazing clients inside my six-month program, Anchored: Overcoming Codependency. If you’ve ever wondered what goes on inside Anchored and what the coaching in this program looks like, this episode is for you.

I’m taking my wonderful client Kelly through the thought work protocol and the somatics model we use inside the program to connect with our bodies, inner children, and inner emotional parts. Tune in to experience the kind of support you'll get inside Anchored, and see what it can look like to start releasing your codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/266

#265: Something I hear quite often from folks is that while they feel really solid in their independence when they’re alone, their emotional outsourcing tendencies seem to suddenly get amplified as soon as they're in relationship, especially romantic relationship. Why does this happen?

Join me this week as I explore the crossfire between our independence and our almost desperate need to connect with and please others. I'll share some of the psychological factors at play that lead to a heightened sense of codependence and people-pleasing inside relationships and my favorite remedies for stepping out of the shadow of old habits and into the light of self-awareness.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/265

#264: Did you know that the health of some of your most important bodily systems – from your nervous system to your reproductive function – is impacted by how loved, safe, and secure you feel in the world? Relating is one of the most vital parts of being a human, and this week, I'm joined by Master Life Coach and self-proclaimed relationship nerd Maggie Reyes to discuss how to do it better.

Listen in as Maggie and I dive into the importance of cultivating coregulation in our relationships, what it means to relate to others with gentle loving kindness, and why our nervous systems are at optimal function when we’re relating well.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://victoriaalbina.com/264