“The mother wound is wanting to be saved by someone, some thing, some process outside yourself, and it's not going to happen.” - John Lee

Today on Men, This Way:

• 0:00 - Introduction & Overview
• 0:38 - Global Context & Personal Impact 
• 1:16 - Introducing the Mother Wound
• 1:46 - Reflections on the Mother Wound
• 2:11 - The Book 'He' and Its Impact 
• 3:37 - Defining the Mother Wound 
• 5:03 - Archetypes of the Mother Wound
• 6:26 - Personal Stories of Mother Wounds
• 10:13 - The Mother vs. Father Wound
• 12:30 - Struggles with Self-Worth
• 16:29 - No Saviors, Only Self-Reliance 
• 18:27 - Facing Illusions in Relationships
• 22:20 - The Role of Therapy in Self-Healing 
• 24:41 - Self-Responsibility & Accountability 
• 27:22 - Projections and the Feminine 
• 30:42 - The Need for Soothing & Relief 
• 35:18 - Relearning Trust and Soothe 
• 42:09 - Self-Worth & External Validation 
• 46:35 - Time as a Catalyst for Change
• 46:59 - Conclusion & Gratitude

Takeaways from this episode:

• Understanding the Mother Wound.
• The Impact of the Mother Wound on Relationships.
• How the Mother Wound Deeply Impacts One's Sense of Self-worth and Value.
• Healing from the Mother Wound Involves Self-reflection and Inner Work.
• Societal and Cultural Factors that Shape the Mother Wound.

Connect with John:

• Website: johnleebooks.com
• Order: Odd One Out: Radical Revelations on Relationships, Self-Help, and Personal Growth
• Book: Private Session
• email: [email protected]

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

This show is produced by Synchro Social

"I'm not against pornography; however, if you're using it to distract yourself or to numb the pain you're experiencing, it might be serving as an escape from having tough conversations" .- Bryan Reeves

Today on Men, This Way:

• 00:02 Greetings & Reconnection
• 01:08 Celebration of Elevate 2025
• 02:27 Discussion on Male Relationships & Growth
• 03:58 Importance of Men's Groups
• 05:44 Introducing the Concept of Resistance
• 07:11 Deep Dive into Resistance
• 10:16 The Illusion of Control
• 12:48 Daily Responsibilities and Life's Illusions
• 14:13 Crafting a Life of Enthusiasm
• 16:05 Cynicism in Personal Growth
• 17:38 Navigating Life's Journeys
• 19:35 Handling Cynicism and its Impacts
• 21:58 Personal Development & Community Support
• 24:38 Encouragement and Reflections on Growth
• 27:14 The Value of Inspiration and Support
• 30:57 Establishing a Sense of Belonging
• 33:41 Overcoming Isolation and Embracing Community
• 35:09 The Dynamics of Men's Groups
• 37:21 The Challenge of Numbing Out
• 40:11 Parental Challenges and Personal Growth
• 43:06 Facing and Understanding Life's Resistance
• 45:34 Disorientation and Life's Direction
• 48:35 Military Experience and Personal Orientation
• 51:48 Momentum and Life's Orientation
• 54:02 Powerlessness and Finding Strength
• 56:31 The Role of Power in Personal and Professional Life
• 59:04 Men's Roles and Challenges in Modern Society
• 01:01:09 The Five Dead Ends and Their Antidotes
• 01:03:46 Closing Thoughts and Invitation to Join

Take Aways:

• The Power Gathering with other Men to Maintain Clarity and Motivation
• Birth and Evolution of "Men This Way"
• Celebrating Community Growth with Elevate 2025
• The Necessity of Peer Support
• Overcoming Resistance as a Path to Personal Growth
• Community as an Antidote to Isolation
• Reframing Challenges with Community Support

Transform Your Life – Join Elevate  Sign up here!

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

This show is produced by Synchro Social

"They have to organize. if we're organized where the kids come first, well, the couple is dead, long live the kids, they go away and bye. Because we lost that loving feeling, we never nurtured it. We weren't important enough to maintain." - Dr. Stan Tatkin

Today on Men, This Way:

00:00 Introduction

01:48 PACT Method and Psychobiological Approach

02:22 Personal Reflections on Dr. Tatkin's Work

04:40 Setting Up the Discussion on Relationships

05:09 Defining Secure Functioning Relationships

05:44 Importance of Teamwork in Relationships

06:43 Challenges in Relationships and Power Dynamics

09:35 Explanation of Attachment Styles: Anchors, Waves, Islands

10:07 The Impact of Childhood on Relationship Dynamics

11:55 Clinging and Distancing in Relationships

13:16 Insights into Attachment from Studies

13:30 Personal Narratives and Their Impact on Perception

14:32 Neglect and Its Subtle Impact

15:32 Resentment from Childhood Expectations

16:04 The Metaphor of "The Bite that Fits the Wound"

17:04 The Role of Anger in Insecure Attachments

18:20 Strategies for Secure Functioning

19:20 Adapting to Partner's Needs and Insecurities

20:11 Understanding Attachment and Its Effects on Relationships

22:38 Responsibility in Relationship Dynamics

23:31 Importance of Understanding Danger and Care in Relationships

26:14 The Importance of Shared Vision in Maintaining Relationships

27:21 Designing Relationships Intentionally

28:21 Prioritizing Relationships Over Other Aspects of Life

31:04 Teamwork and Interdependency in Relationships

31:56 Role of Partners in Regulating Each Other's Nervous Systems

34:21 The Practical Application of Co-regulation Techniques

38:28 The Unreliability of Narratives in Understanding Relationships

40:05 The Flaws of Memory and Perception in Communication

41:03 The Challenge of Modeling Successful Relationships

43:02 Strategies for Better Relationship Dynamics

44:12 The Need for Intentionality in Relationships

46:05 The Impact of Stress on Relationship Dynamics

49:05 The Necessity of Protective Measures in Relationships

50:09 The Importance of Commitment and Intention in Relationships

52:22 The Timeframe for Developing Strong Relationship Skills

54:17 The Role of Purpose and Principle in Relationship Longevity

55:06 Establishing and Adhering to Relationship Principles

56:07 Vision and Future Planning in Relationships

57:19 Deciding When to Persist or Let Go in Relationships

59:21 The Social Contracts That Define Personal Relationships

61:02 The Mutual Benefits of a Committed Relationship

64:07 The Hopeful Aspect of Engaging in Relationship Work

66:30 Dr. Tatkin's New Publications and Future Projects

67:44 Closing Thoughts and Reflections on Relationship Dynamics

Takeaways from this episode:

• The Importance of Secure Functioning in Relationships.
• The Impact of Attachment Styles.
• Role of Co-regulation
• Communication Strategies Under Stress
• The Necessity of Intentionality and Planning in Relationships
• Navigating Relationship Challenges with Emotional Intelligence
• The Psychological Impact of Neglect
• The Influence of Past Trauma on Current Relationships
• The Concept of Mutual Support and Teamwork
• Shared Vision and Purpose

Transform Your Life – Join Elevate  Sign up here!

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

Connect with Dr. Stan Tatkin:

• Website: thepactinstitute.com
• Buy the book: In Each Other's Care
• Therapy with Dr.Tatkin: Couples therapy
• Sign up: Retreat
• Instagram: @drstantatkin 

This show is produced by Synchro Social

"I constantly remind parents to ask their children how they feel and to always respond with 'thank you for sharing.' This simple practice can transform relationships.” -Brooke Weinstein

Today on Men, This Way:

02:02 Welcome & Introduction.

02:32 Acknowledging Past Discussions.

03:08 Expertise in Sensory and Emotional Regulation.

03:28 The Importance of Parental Emotional Regulation.

03:40Understanding Co-Regulation.

05:38 Influence of Parental Behavior on Children.

07:50 Addressing Challenges of Premature Birth.

10:17 Developmental Stages and Parenting Approaches.

18:16 Discussing Boundaries in Parenting.

19:28 Early Childhood Development and Setting Boundaries.

27:48 Challenges with Social Transitions and Sensory Overload.

31:35 Transition to Adolescence.

38:25 Medication and Support for Sensory Issues.

42:35 Adolescent Social Interactions and Emotional Regulation.

47:30 Preparing for the Social World in Adolescence.

53:50 Supporting Adolescents Through Challenges.

56:19 Addressing Anxiety and Depression in Young Adults.

Takeaways from this episode:

• We're never truly ready for parenting.
• Co-regulation is essential for emotional health.
• Understanding developmental stages helps parents support their children.
• Birth experiences can significantly impact a child's development.
• Emotional regulation starts with the parents.
• Setting boundaries is crucial for children's growth.
• Children need to express their feelings openly.
• Independence is built through gradual support from parents.
• ADHD symptoms can overlap with sensory regulation issues.
• Open communication is vital for addressing anxiety and depression in teens.

Transform Your Life – Join Elevate  Sign up here!

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

Connect with Dr. Brooke:

• Website: drbrookeweinstein.com
• Instagram: @brookeweinst
• Podcast: Thrive Like a Parent
• Youtube: Dr. Brooke Weinstein

This show is produced by Synchro Social

I’ve got a profound episode for you today. My guest is Bill Plotkin, one of the most genius and inspired visionaries of our time that you’ve likely never heard of.

He’s the author of a few books that have rocked my world, most notably, Nature and The Human Soul.

When I first read Nature and The Human Soul some years ago, I felt like I’d discovered a sacred tablet with the codes to living every stage of life well.

Through his work spanning 5 decades as a depth psychologist, wilderness guide, and founder of western Colorado’s Animas Valley Institute, Bill has led thousands of women and men through nature-based initiatory rites-of-passage, and from his work he HAS brought back a vigorously detailed map of the stages of human development, from birth to death, including the specific tasks that are required for someone to complete if they are to psychologically progress from one developmental stage to the next, like from late adolescence to early adulthood. Building on Carl Jung’s work, and the work of countless other brilliant hearts and minds spanning a myriad of human cultures, when I read Bill’s work, I understand more clearly the adventure of my life, the story arcs that have played out, the excruciating bottoms I’ve hit at critical and pivotal moments of my life, and what the real tasks of the different stages of life are that, if I don’t accomplish those tasks, then I don’t truly grow or evolve, even though my body may age. 

A major theme he explores in his work, which we talk about in this episode, is the overwhelming lack of true adults in the modern world, and the state of humanity as being currently made up largely of people stuck in adolescent ways of thinking, being, and doing. 

We also talk about a critical phase of the life journey, The Journey of Soul Initiation, an experience undertaken between adolescence and adulthood, and a prerequisite for any human to step into true adulthood, and sadly a journey our culture does not support, and in fact actively discourages.

Soooo much to explore here. Bill is one of my beloved elders and teachers, I encourage you to listen to this entire episode, get Bill’s books. If you have or want kids, Bill’s work can help you understand what your own children need to experience at different stages of development, if they are to become truly healthy adults.

So let’s get going. I start off our conversation with a personal story of something that happened to me after I got out of the military, and we take off from there into a profound conversation, which is still but a short stroll on the tippy top of the massive iceberg that is his life’s work. 

Near the end, before he gives us insight into how you can move further in the direction of your own journey of soul initiation, I ask Bill whether he has hope for humanity, given culture’s resistance to creating mature adults. His answer will surprise you, maybe frighten you. He does have hope, but not in the way you might think.

So, definitely stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

👉 https://www.animas.org

"We're hardwired not just for survival but for connection. We need different types of bonds, like intimate ones with partners. Many of us struggle because we didn’t experience enough secure attachment as children." - Owen Marcus

Today on Men, This Way:

00:00 Welcome & Introduction

01:07 Background and Everyman 

02:20 Early Challenges with Dyslexia and Asperger's 

03:25 Realizations and Growth 

04:23 Motivation to Start Men's Work 

05:00 The Importance of Feeling in Relationships 

08:33 Introducing Somatics and Co-regulation 

11:12 Discussing Safety and Vulnerability 

13:16 Creating Safe Spaces in Men's Groups 

14:11 Deepening Connections Through Vulnerability 

16:17 The Rock Formula: Relax, Open, Connect 

18:35 The Impact of Constant Stress on Relationships and Health 

22:48 Proactive Approaches to Men's Mental Health 

25:44 The Process of Embracing Change and New Practices

28:47 The Role of Community and Connection in Men's Work 

33:15 Finding and Creating Men's Groups 

37:22 Challenges of Emotional Expression in High-Stakes Professions 

40:17 Somatic Practices and Mindfulness 

43:14 Patterns in Men's Emotional Growth and Resistance

47:13 The Importance of Language in Expressing Emotions

50:23 Current Personal Challenges and Insights 

52:54 The Future of Men's Work and Community Growth

55:49 Advice for Women Supporting Men's Emotional Growth 

59:24 Closing Thoughts and Appreciation

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

Join Elevate: https://bryanreeves.com/elevate 

Connect with Owen Marcus:

• Website: owenmarcus.com
• Instagram: @owenmarcus

This show is produced by Synchro Social

I’m talking today with my dear friend, intimacy coach and expert, and just all around lovely human being, Allana Pratt. We’re talking about Presence … whatever does that mean!

So many of us men may get that feedback from an intimate partner … “I just don’t feel your presence” …or “I don’t feel connected to you.” Or … “It’s like you’re not really here.” … and we have no idea what they’re talking about because ... "I’m right here!!!!"

So, I invited Alanna on to explore presence … from a woman’s perspective.

Allana's new online course for singles, “Becoming The One” in which she helps show you how to stop looking for the one and learn instead how to BECOME the one; BECOME the love you are looking for.

👉 Becoming The One Intro Course https://allanapratt.com/becomeintro

Use discount code: BRYAN to get it FREE (100% discount)

Allana drops all kinds of wisdom nuggets and insights in this episode so … Take a deep breath, and dive into presence with us, in this episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …

Let’s dive ...

“I didn't believe my stories or experiences had value, so I lacked confidence. But being in this group, getting feedback, and realizing that what I share brings value, joy, and insight has filled me with confidence.

- Jeff Wright -Elevate 2024 Member.

"My confidence comes from knowing I have a trustable brotherhood to rely on, something I never had before."

- Scott Silvi - Elevate 2024 Member.

“You can bring anything—your suffering, questions, or sadness—and you'll get caring feedback without anyone trying to fix you.”

- Jamie Bruffey - Elevate 2024 Member.

Today on Men, This Way:

[00:00] Welcome & Introduction

[03:00] The Weight Men Carry

[04:42] The Turning Point

[05:27] Meet the Guests

[07:09] The Burden of Carrying It Well

[09:51] Crushing Loneliness

[12:22] Lonely Success

[13:49] Confessions of Shame

[16:27] The Power of Men's Work

[21:02] Vulnerability as Strength

[30:22] Masks of Masculinity

[33:25] Fatherhood Reimagined

[38:59] Trusting Men Again

[39:33] Transformation in Relationships

[41:09] The Importance of Trustable Elders

[53:11] From Lone Wolf to Brotherhood

[49:05] Final Reflections

[1:10:33] Join Elevate 2025

Join Elevate: https://bryanreeves.com/elevate

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

This show is produced by Synchro Social

I’ve got a special episode for you today … if you’ve been listening this year, you know that after 4 years of doing this podcast I’ve invited my long-time childhood best-friend of 40 years, Tait, … to co-host the podcast with me. And the last 10 or so episodes we’ve been doing just that … 

Tait is also my business partner and co-facilitator for the last 4 years in the men’s work we’ve been hosting for men all over the world. He and I together have stewarded around 70 men through our two immersive coaching programs, our year-long ELEVATE Men’s Coaching Adventure, and Elevate Your Relationship, our 6-month live relationship coaching program for men.

Today, we take a step back, put him back in the guest role, and talk about the journey of our friendship, the ways men show up for each other, and the ways we often don’t know how … like accountability we tend to suck at really holding each other accountable … we also talk about what men really want in life, and what typically stands in our way of having it and fully experiencing the joy of it.

We revisit the origins of our map, The 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man, … how that map came to us one fateful weekend after a life-changing decision we’d each made for ourselves … and we do a little dive into each pillar … 

If you’re inspired or intrigued or this just stirs up something for you, consider joining us for our next ELEVATE men coaching adventure, where we work with men for an entire year to elevate their lives in the ways that are most meaningful to them … Learn more about that at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate

This episode drops all kinds of wisdom nuggets and insights that could absolutely be life-changing for you,

So, take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …

Let’s dive …

"If you make room for your gifts, your gifts will make room for you." - Preston Smiles

Today on Men, This Way:

• 00:00 Introduction and Welcoming Preston Smiles 
• 04:40 Honoring Preston's Journey and Friendship 
• 10:52 Preston's Philosophy on Failure and Success 
• 22:52 Conversations With God 
• 27:24 Impact of Shame and Forgiveness
• 33:40 Somatic Body and Joy Alarms 
• 49: 39 Challenges of Masculinity and Porn
• 59:27 Navigating Marriage and Relationships
• 1:01:50 The Importance of Conflict Resolution with Nervous System Regulation

Connect with Preston:

• Website: All his links
• Instagram: @prestonsmiles
• Book: https://prestonsmiles.com/book

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

This show is produced by Synchro Social

"The heroic individual carries such an onerous responsibility. Don't we want to be entangled, connected, and create a community so we don’t have to carry everything on our shoulders?" - Sophie Strand

Today on Men, This Way:

• 07:45 - Sophie’s introduction to her life and work background.
• 15:36 - Bryan's journey on healing his masculine energy through reading 'Women Who Run With the Wolves.
• 16:55 - Sophie shares the evolution of her life through writing and how it evolves along with her life.
• 18:37 - Swords or Wands: Creating connections instead of dividing and feeling alone in the world as men.
• 25:46 -Understanding why masculinity is healthier when it embraces a greater diversity of archetypes.
• 30:31 - Where is Dionysus in our modern world?
• 33:27 - Embracing the present and overcoming the modern culture that values feeling good only when doing more.
• 39:59 -Bryan shares the lessons and insights he has gained while facing the challenges of infertility in his marriage
• 42:06 - How our culture struggles with understanding that some things are not resolvable, and that's okay.
• 43:52 - We can learn valuable lessons from the character Tom Bombadil for our lives.
• 52:03 Are narcissists really the bad guys of modern culture?

Ready to stop going it alone? Join Elevate:

https://elevaterelationship.com/

Connect with Sophie Strand:

• Website: Here
• Instagram:@cosmogyny

Connect with Bryan & Tait:

• Website: bryanreeves.com 
• Instagram: @bryanreevesinsight / @taitarend08
• Email: [email protected] / [email protected] 

This show is produced by Synchro Social