What do you do if you get anxious on dates? My guest, Jeff Guenther, LPC (@TherapyJeff), shares many practical tips for managing anxiety on dates and enjoying the process more! We talk about different ways anxiety shows up, specifically how to ask for feedback from your dates and how to cope when you feel anxious on dates. Jeff also shares his advice for folks in new relationships, including eight questions to ask once you've DTR'd (defined the relationship).

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Here's the episode of Problem Solved we mentioned toward the end

Questions to ask after defining the relationship

1. Are there any aspects of our relationship you want to keep private?
2. How do you define cheating?
3. How do you want me to break up with you?
4. Will you feel hurt if I start watching a new TV series without you?
5. When we order food, should I assume we’re sharing or is it separate?
6. How much time should we plan to spend together on average?
7. If I ever cheated on you just once, how would you want me to handle it?
8. Should we talk about everyone we've hooked up with, especially if we're still talking to them?

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About Jeff Guenther, LPC

Jeff earned a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from the University of Southern California and a bachelor’s degree in Child and Family Development from San Diego State University. His therapeutic career began at a crisis line, where he supported individuals experiencing suicidal thoughts and severe anxiety. Before establishing his private practice, Jeff also provided therapy to high-risk students in the public school system. Since 2005, he has called Portland, Oregon, home, focusing his practice on helping both couples and individuals.

In his spare time, Jeff creates engaging one-minute videos for TikTok and Instagram, along with more in-depth content on Passes. Follow him across platforms for relationship advice, tips, pep talks, and resources designed to enhance mental health.

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What should you be looking for when you're getting to know people you're dating? In this episode, I share the top 10 qualities to look for in a long-term romantic partner - no matter your gender, age, or who you're dating. You'll also learn a few different ways for how to tell if your date has these qualities, and you can think about whether or not YOU embody these qualities as well.

Date Ideas

Date Jar Video

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In this episode, I'm answering YOUR dating dilemmas! Hear three real issues from daters just like you. The first question is about what to do after having sex on date two... and they've fallen off the face of the earth after being so charming (ugh). The second one is about moving on after an amazing experience with a great guy who just didn't have time for commitment. And the last one is from a woman going through a divorce while having a friends with benefits situation who also just can't commit. Should she keep it going or walk away? Listen to the full episode for my advice for these relatable dating situations!

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Whether you're dating or have a partner, we can't overlook the most important relationship you'll ever have: the one with YOU. In this episode, you'll learn how to practice self-acceptance and compassion, why I don't believe in "just loving yourself," and how this affects your dating life. You'll also get tons of practical tips for beating negative self-talk, developing your relationship with yourself, and becoming your own secure base so you can date with more confidence.

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Why do we feel so anxious when waiting for a text from someone we just started dating? In this episode, Sabrina Zohar breaks down exactly why texting in early dating causes so much anxiety and how to address it so it doesn't consume your body and mind. Sabrina and I get into the role texting plays in dating and the journey she had with her boyfriend who's absolutely NOT into texting at all. We also talk about what she's working on now as someone with anxiety in a relationship, how to navigate sleeping together on the first date and so much more.

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About Sabrina:

Sabrina Zohar is a dynamic entrepreneur and dating coach best known for her transformative podcast, The Sabrina Zohar Show. With a no-nonsense approach to relationship advice, the podcast has ranked in the top 0.05% globally, offering practical tips backed by licensed psychologists to help listeners improve their dating lives through self-worth and personal growth.

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If you want to prioritize IRL connections, this episode is for you. I'm deep-diving into exactly where real people who listen to this podcast are meeting other single people to connect with and date! This episode will leave you feeling inspired to leave your house one way or another, whether that involves signing up for salsa classes or taking yourself out on a date once a week. I also get into how to start conversations and various ways to tell if the cutie you're chatting with is single or not.

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How to get asked out ft. Blaine Anderson

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Before you download a dating app for the first time or maybe 100th time, listen to this solo episode. I'm sharing three essential tips for making your profile work for you, keeping your mindset in check and messaging so you actually get off the apps and onto more dates!

Want to skip all the trial and error on dating apps? Check out my NEW course on mastering dating apps called Swipe Match Date! Use code PODCAST at checkout for a discount.

Dating App Episodes

• Genny Diehl - episode 33
• Erika Ettin - episode 74

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Get out your tarot cards, crystal balls, and astrology charts! We're making predictions for what dating in 2025 will be like - share yours in the comments if you're listening on Spotify. In this episode, you'll hear dating predictions from friends of the podcast - all their IG accounts are linked below. I loved this collection of predictions. Everyone thinks dating is moving away from the screen and toward real-life connections, among other things. I'm so excited to see how 2025 dating actually plays out.

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Claire Perelman @sexclarified

Julia Mazur @pmdpod

Erika Ettin @alittlenudge

Ali Jackson @findingmrheight

Amy Chan @missamychan

Lauren Josephine @lookingforsomethingserious

Damona Hoffman @damonahoffman

Benjamin Camras @benjamincamras

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I'm joined by guest Sam Whitney, author of How To Date Authentically, to discuss what it means to date to be happy vs just trying to be right. Sam shares practical tips on dating with authenticity, improving your listening skills and other tools you need to develop to make real connections in your dating journey. I love Sam's unique perspective on the dating process and I know you will too!

Get 15% off Jenni Kayne with code DATING15 https://www.jennikayne.com/

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"If he wanted to he would" and "It will happen when you least expect it" are just two examples of the dating advice we're so done with. In this episode, I'm sharing what dating advice floating around the internet is unhelpful and why, and what to focus on instead that will actually get you closer to your goals of getting into a secure, healthy long term relationship. The advice that works is based on what other listeners have found success with - not just my experience. I'd love to hear from you! What advice are you so done with hearing?

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Ever wonder what it's like to use dating apps for the first time in your 40's when you're already a parent and going through a divorce? My mom, Daniella Landau, shares her dating intentionally story after getting separated and divorced. She describes her approach to dating apps, how she met her husband on OkCupid, and more. Daniella also shares her experience with breaking up and getting back together with her husband before they got married, and what it took to transform their relationship. She also shares details about how they approached introducing each other to their kids. It was an amazing conversation and I hope you enjoy it!

Connect with Daniella on IG: https://www.instagram.com/happy_in_transit/

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