This was such a fun episode to create! A parent in the Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens opened up about their concerns for their 15-year-old daughter, who’s beginning to ride with friends who are new drivers. As her peers gain driving experience, this parent is feeling understandably anxious about safety and how to guide their teen through this phase. I acknowledged these valid concerns and suggested a reframing approach, focusing on building trust in teens’ growth through their experiences. While emphasizing the importance of safety, I encouraged open, ongoing conversations about responsible driving to help build awareness and accountability. I also recommended that parents engage their teens with questions about friends’ driving behaviors and reinforce family rules constructively. To help manage parental anxiety, I shared practical tools like deep breathing, recognizing fears, and reframing thoughts to foster trust in the learning process. Allowing teens to make mistakes within safe boundaries, I explained, helps build their decision-making skills and strengthens the parent-teen relationship. Watching teens gain independence is challenging, but it’s a crucial step in their development.

Find more show notes and info about our sponsors at: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/Eps-527-Managing-our-fears-about-teenagers-and-driving/

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My guest today is Jenell Kheriaty, and we’re talking about school avoidance & school refusal. We discuss what school refusal is and if there’s certain “types” of kids who are predisposed to school avoidance or school refusal. Both Jenell and I share how we support families who are struggling with their teens not going to school, some specific questions you can ask your teen about school, and how and why parents need to stay curious about their teen’s school experience.,

We talk about how to handle our own feelings when changes are not happening as fast as we want. We get into figuring out if your child’s school is a good fit, finding alternative options to your neighborhood high school, and checking our own assumptions about our teen’s journey in school. 

Takeaways from the show

• School refusal is typically not a case of defiance, it’s an act of protection 
• All kids, even successful high-achievers, can struggle with school avoidance  
• School refusal is a symptom of something else going on
• “Be curious, not judgmental” 
• When our timeline doesn’t line up with their timeline 
• When your teen has a different temperament and stress tolerance than you do 
• Alternative schooling options 
• Trusting the process, trusting the journey 
• Maintaining relationship during the bumpy times 

For more show notes, including transcripts, visit our website here.

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In today’s episode, I respond to a parent in the Facebook community who is seeking support for an “unmotivated” 14-year-old, wanting a coach for help with goals, motivation, executive functioning, and self-care, ideally within budget and virtual. I explore the difference between being “unmotivated” and “uninspired,” suggesting that teens may seem unmotivated due to broader issues like discouragement or lack of inspiration. Instead of trying to “fix” teens, I encourage listeners to reframe the situation by asking, “What is getting in my child’s way?” I emphasize curiosity, encouragement, and a connection-based approach, allowing teens to express their needs and experiences without judgment. I also remind parents to avoid labeling, stay present, and focus on personal growth, trusting that their child will ultimately find their way.

Find more show notes and info about our sponsors at: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-525-support-for-parents-with-unmotivated-teens/

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I am really excited about my guest today, and I have a feeling you will be, too! My amazing daughter, Rowan, is back to give us an update on her life. She talk about everything from teen mental health, navigating ADHD as a teen and young adult, the college journey, and more!

I ask Rowan what she’s learned in her first few years of adulthood while juggling working, living on her own, and going to school. We talk about motivation versus discipline, lessons learned through experience, changing perspectives, and boundaries. Rowan wraps us up by sharing what she wishes Gen X knows about the young adults of today. 

Takeaways from the show

• Describing and revisiting tough times & emotions 
• Returning to (and loving) college 
• Changing your mindset to achieve your goal 
• Learning how to be a college student 
• Navigating ADHD diagnosis & medications 
• The pressure of early adulthood 
• Takeaways from the first few years of being on your own 
• Motivation versus discipline 
• Lessons are learned through experience 
• How we respond to our kids when they are having a hard time influences the relationships we have with them later 
• Perspectives changing as you age and get out of the thick of it 
• Finding the humor, joy, and not taking life too seriously

For more show notes, including transcripts, visit our website here.

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Inspired by my conversation with Annie Donaldson this week, I explore the layered experience of being a teen and offer some ideas around how to invite them to consider their higher selves. Our teens are deep and thoughtful. Listen in for tips and strategies around communication and connection.

See all show notes and information about our sponsors at: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-523-exploring-the-layers-of-our-teens-experience-and-inviting-them-into-their-higher-selves

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This episode is an interview with Annie Donaldson, coach for teens. We spend our time talking about how spirituality and considering a higher power and bigger picture can be helpful to our teens as they move through adolescence and navigate the beginning of realizing that change in life is the only constant. This conversation isn't about religion, but it is about deeply considering, sharing and normalizing conversations about our spiritual selves. Check it out and let me know what you think!

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Getting into the nitty-gritty of how to navigate the lies we may be hearing from our kids. Why is it so triggering? Why do they do it? What is the most useful way to respond? And how can we keep in mind that mistakes (like lying) are opportunities to learn and grow? Listen in and we can dive into all of these questions together!

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My guest today is Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart.

Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart & Casey dig into ADHD in the adolescent years. Parents of teens with ADHD may see dysregulation looking like compulsiveness, messiness, impulsivity, & a lack of motivation. Parents may think that their kids are lazy or lacking willpower, when in reality, their executive functioning skills are truly off balance. Dr. Lockhart & Casey talk about discussing long-term goals with teens, moving backwards from there, baby steps, as well as figuring out what feels hard so we can best support them. They discuss how to support adolescents with ADHD and how that may differ from what neurotypical teen brains need. Dr. Lockhart explains what rejection sensitive dysphoria is & how to talk to teens about their ADHD. Casey asks how to get buy-in from a teen to work with an ADHD coach or other outside support or services. They finish by talking about what teens with ADHD need most.  

Takeaways from the show

• Keeping your focus on teaching life skills, not compliance 
• What does ADHD look like in an adolescent?  
• Misconceptions about teens with ADHD 
• Asking “what’s hard about it?” 
• Scaffolding & strategies like body doubling and creating a false sense of urgency 
• Do teens with ADHD need different things to support brain development than a neurotypical adolescent? 
• Rejection sensitive dysphoria
• Talking to teens about their ADHD 
• Getting your teen to utilize an ADHD coach or other outside support
• What do teens with ADHD need most? 

For more show notes, including transcripts, visit our website here.

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I see and field a lot of questions from parents about disrespect and kids who seem to have no desire to connect or be with the family. We talk so much about relationship here, but what happens when there seems to be no desire for a relationship on the side of the kids? This is where we head this week on the show…

Big shout out to a member of the Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens FB Group member who gave permission to me to tease apart a post she shared there here on the podcast!

For full show notes and info about our sponsors, go to: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-520-disrespect-and-relationship-with-our-teenagers/

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Brenda Zane is back this week!  

She was on the podcast before (spring 2023) talking about how to be with teen substance abuse. 

We had SUCH an amazing response to that conversation that Brenda and I thought it would be helpful to have her back to talk about “what do you do” for specific scenarios around our teens and substances that leave us feeling in the dark. Today we discuss how to set healthy boundaries around teen substance abuse while still maintaining a connected relationship with our teens. 

Takeaways from the show

• Creating conditions for positive change in children, and the plant analogy.
• Why young people turn to substance use, including a desire to cope with emotional pain and shame.
• Setting boundaries around drug use
• The challenge of enforcing consequences
• The importance of addition over subtraction in facilitating change
• Have open and curious conversations with their teenagers about substance use, rather than resorting to shame or judgment
• The importance of building a positive relationship with children, focusing on mutual respect and influence rather than control or manipulation
• The "information sandwich" technique to discuss sensitive topics with teenagers
• How humor and modeling positive behavior are useful tools
• Focusing on boundaries and natural consequences, rather than reactive measures like drug testing and phone confiscation

For more show notes, including transcripts, visit our website here.

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This week's solo show teases apart the difference between being in resistance and being in flow when it comes to the ride we are on while parenting teenagers. The middle school and high school years are a current that is ever changing, and we have choices in how we lean into the ebb and flow. This week I share a post from a parent in the Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens FB Group that resonated deeply with me, and bring my own learning from a meditation practice I was invited into.

For more show notes and news about our sponsors, go to: https://www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-519-finding-flow-in-the-current-of-parenting-teens/

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