Three Bean Salad

Three Bean Salad

A podcast from comedians Mike Wozniak, Henry Paker and Benjamin Partridge. Each week the three beans tackle a different theme, suggested by the listening audience.

  • 1 hour 18 minutes
    Farming
    This week the beans doff their Harris Tweed flap caps to Chrissie of Bremen whose topic suggestion of farming has slipped out of the bean machine’s birth canal, glistening with the lukewarm goo of banter before landing softly on the (also lukewarm) straw of compelling, independent broadcasting and bleating with the timbre of nature’s very own promotional jingle. The beans shall return come the radish harvest (June).

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod
    24 April 2024, 12:15 am
  • 1 hour 9 minutes
    Wine
    The Industrial Revolution, the assassination of Julius Caesar, the debut performance of “Wang Dang Doodle” by Howlin’ Wolf, the wedding of Jérôme d'Ambrosio and Eleonore von Habsburg, The Black Death. What do these things have in common? All of them took place within spitting distance of some quantity of wine probably. No wonder then that Charlie of St. Louis has selected wine as this week’s topic for the beans - served lukewarm.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod
    17 April 2024, 12:15 am
  • 58 minutes 29 seconds
    Olives
    Trigger warning for any misophonia sufferers this episode (although Henry probably weeded these people out long ago). Olives is this week’s topic with thanks to Lewis of Lewisham. Obviously no one really understands what an olive is so it’s a tough one for the beans but the beans battle on gamely nonetheless. Giant snails also get a mention and about ruddy time.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod
    10 April 2024, 12:15 am
  • 1 hour 9 minutes
    Cloche Bleue
    Cloche Bleue: noun
    1) Term used to denote a blue bell or a cat named Bluebell by a French speaker or by members of London’s metropolitan elite 
    2) archaic Obsolete Royal Naval punishment also known as the “Arctic Arse Spinnaker” 
    3) A curate’s egg of an episode in which the podcasters forget to find a proper topic to discuss after being mesmerised by the work of a French jinglist called Samuel

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod

    Music includes:An der schönen blauen Donau, Op.314 (Strauss Jr., Johann) by Das Orchester TSUMUGI. (Creative Commons Attribution 4.0)
    3 April 2024, 12:23 am
  • 1 hour 2 minutes
    The Beach
    Matt from Newcastle gets the beans chatting about the beach this week. Sure they cover the hits (your shingle, your windbreaks, your snorkels and so on) but they also cast a bean smeared lens over the behavioural psychology, the paleoanthropology and yes the very mythos of the towel/bare arse interface.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod

    LIVE SHOW TICKETS:
    MANCHESTER: https://www.seetickets.com/tour/three-bean-salad
    BRISTOL: https://tobaccofactorytheatres.com/shows/three-bean-salad-podcast-live/
    MACHYNLLETH: https://machcomedyfest.co.uk/show/2024/three-bean-salad-three-bean-salad-podcast-live-2/
    27 March 2024, 1:15 am
  • 1 hour 31 seconds
    Tough Guys
    This weeks topic is tough guys and that’s thanks to Joe from Bremen in the Cotswolds who clearly understands what this podcast is actually about. Naturally the beans thrive in this chatosphere. After all, one of them has at least seven extremely small scars, one of them has driven a convertible with the top down in Wales and one of them is a card carrying beefcake.

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod
    20 March 2024, 1:15 am
  • 55 minutes 25 seconds
    Ghosts
    Isaac of Bremen recommends the beans set banter to spooky and discuss ghosts this week. As you’d imagine they put what has long been a contentious subject to bed once and for all and they’re very brave about it at the same time but in an unassuming and modest way (and we’re not talking false modesty mind you). Benjamin Partridge also reveals the secret fuel of the Jingle Meister.


    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad


    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com


    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod

    13 March 2024, 1:15 am
  • 55 minutes 32 seconds
    Stonehenge
    Did the druidic architecture firm that designed Stonehenge make their pitch with a scale model made of beans? Were the stones moved halfway across Britain by crabs? (NB on a map the direction of travel is sideways!) Was Stonehenge the location of King Arthur’s stag do? There’s absolutely no way of knowing any of the above as it’s a prehistoric structure (ie built in a zero red tape environment so non-existent record keeping/planning protocols etc). But if there’s one thing that’s never stopped the Beans’ flow of lukewarm banter it’s a complete lack of concrete knowledge. So lie down, think of Albion and enjoy this Stonehenge based episode with thanks to this week’s topic suggester Ian of Stone.

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod

    6 March 2024, 1:19 am
  • 14 minutes 3 seconds
    Interim non-episode anti-episode-isode
    No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (we're away until March).

    Join our PATREON at patreon.com/threebeansalad for bonus episodes.

    7 February 2024, 1:15 am
  • 6 minutes 3 seconds
    Fifth Wednesday Warning Broadcast
    No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (it's a five Wednesday January and we will only do four Wednesday episodes in a month on the basis of cosmic health and safety)

    Join our PATREON at patreon.com/threebeansalad for bonus episodes.
    31 January 2024, 1:15 am
  • 1 hour 4 minutes
    Circus
    For the last episode of the season place your head in the jaws of podcasting and let its lukewarm slobber cascade into your ears because the theme, with thanks to Stephen of Ireland, is the circus. The beans will be away for the month of Frerbrurary investigating whether or not fleas actually enjoy circus skills training or performance work but shall return full of the proverbial in March.

    With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw.

    Tickets to see Mike's tour show Zusa can be found here: https://littlewander.co.uk/show/mike-wozniak-zusa-2/

    Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad

    Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com

    Get in touch: [email protected] @beansaladpod
    24 January 2024, 1:15 am
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