From Relationships Rule! show notes:

Talking is easy, connecting is hard – and according to Brian Miller it can be learned!

A magician turned author, speaker, and consultant on human connection – Brian Miller is here to help us understand what human connection really is, and how to magically connect to anyone.

Brian believes everyone deserves to feel heard, understood, and valued.

In this episode you will learn:

• Why strangers are the easiest people to ask questions.
• Why Brian spent an hour talking about human connection on stage but never talked about empathy.
• Why the most interesting people are always the most interested people.
• How connection always starts with understanding.
• The art and importance of remembering names – Why names matter?

Listen to the full conversation: https://brianmillerspeaks.com/relationships-rule-podcast/

Cait is a Forbes-featured 7-figure Business Coach for women and, in her words, your excuse’s worst nightmare.

But back when we met in 2019, she was in distress.

She’d been invited to deliver a TEDx talk, and suddenly found herself in unfamiliar territory. Cait was a master at riffing on livestreams. She had attracted a sizable social media following and went from quitting the 9-5 to multiple six figures as a business coach in just a few years, leaning hard on her magnetism and charisma, grounded in sharp intellect.

But a TED talk? That’s a whole different ball game, requiring precision and rehearsal.

In just 2 months we clarified her Big Idea, structured the talk, and wrote the script. I had the honor of traveling to upstate New York to watch her deliver the talk live and in-person on the Red Dot.

And within 10 minutes of that night, she transformed her business into a 7-figure global empire.

Today she’s a millionaire CEO, mom to the most adorable little girl - born just a week after my son - and has another on the way.

In this conversation, Cait and I pull back the curtain on the coaching industry: What is a business coach, when do you know you need one, and what should you expect from a coaching relationship?

She also explains the difference between 1-1 and group coaching, both for those thinking of joining a coaching program, and for coaches deciding which type of program to offer their clients.

And of course, Cait shares her story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

Plus, she gives a super inspirational piece of advice to young professionals trying to make it in this increasingly chaotic and isolated world.

RELATED LINKS:

• Website: https://Cait.co
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/caitscudder
• TEDx talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PU_SDcn5XGA

Do you want to become more interesting than Netflix? Francisco is a storytelling expert and one of my favorite professional friends.

We met a couple years ago when he invited me to be one of the first guests on his podcast, of which I am also the first repeat guest. 

It only seemed right that after hours of talking about my work on his show, he should have a chance to talk about his work on mine. And let me tell you, this is one of the most practical episodes in seasons.

We discussed the difference between motivational speaking and being a content matter expert, what a story really is and why you should be telling them in business, and where to find stories to tell. Then we did a deep dive on story structure, the different types and when they work, or don’t. 

And of course, Francisco shares his story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

Plus, he gives a very practical piece of advice to young professionals trying to make it in this increasingly chaotic and isolated world.

RELATED LINKS:

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/fmahfuz/
• Bare: A Guide to Brutally Honest Public Speaking (book): https://amzn.to/3CFL5mB
• Storypowers Bootcamp (course): https://storypowers.thinkific.com/courses/storypowers-online-bootcamp
• "The Secret of a Magical TEDx Talk" - My recent guest appearance on the Storypowers Podcast: https://brianmillerspeaks.com/storypowers-tedx-episode/

Julia Freeland is a passionate educator and change engineer, who has spent most of her life working to help people break through limiting beliefs and seemingly impenetrable barriers to become better versions of themselves.

She is also the author of Take Your Shoes Off First, a parable book with a message near and dear to my heart - perspective-taking.

Julia and I discussed that weird head nod teenage boys do, and why it might be more important than you think, the role of language in human connection, how to become undisruptable in your life and career, why today’s world is more like open sea swimming than laps in a pool, the one question that triggers empathy in any conversation, and how to get your kids to eat vegetables.

And of course, Julia shares her story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

Plus, she gives a lovely piece of advice to young professionals trying to make it in this increasingly chaotic and isolated world.

RELATED LINKS

• Julia's website: https://RevolveYou.com
• LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/julia-freeland-revolveyou/
• Take Your Shoes Off First (book): https://amzn.to/3vX9By2
• My episode on Julia's podcast: https://brianmillerspeaks.com/take-your-shoes-off-first

Mark Metry is an entrepreneur, a Forbes featured TEDx and keynote speaker, and a podcast host who has interviewed billionaires, New York Times bestselling authors and world-class human beings on his Global Top 100 podcast.

But once upon a time he couldn't make direct eye contact with anyone. Mark suffered from social anxiety.

And boy can I relate to that.

In this conversation we discussed the seeming contradiction of running a group program for people with social anxiety, his background as an immigrant who overcame bullying, racial discrimination, and health issues to become a success entrepreneur in his teens, how he pushed through social anxiety to become a global top 100 podcaster, and crucially, how to know when to quit a project or task. 

And of course, Mark shares his story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

Plus, he gives a critical piece of advice to young professionals trying to make it in this increasingly chaotic and isolated world.

Connect with Mark: 

• Website: https://MarkMetry.com
• Screw Being Shy (book): https://amzn.to/3vcUZdJ
• Social Anxiety Society (podcast): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/social-anxiety-society/id1270828712

Corey McComb is a writer based in San Diego. Through blog posts, essays, and the occasional short story, Corey examines the human condition and new ways of thinking.

He also works with people and companies who need to tell their stories to launch products and spread ideas.

And speaking of spreading ideas, that’s how I came across Corey’s work: his brand new TEDx talk.

It’s called, “Productivity Is For Robots! Here’s How to Stay Human.” And it quickly became one of my all-time favorite TEDx talks.

As someone who has both given a viral TEDx talk myself, and coached dozens of speakers to spread their big idea on the red dot, I was absolutely blown away by Corey’s content, delivery, structure, and of course, writing.

In this conversation we discuss many things, but it all centers on being a professional creative. How do you get ideas, balancing business with creativity, why you should be a collector of stories, what he did when he went completely blank during his TEDx talk, how comedian John Mulaney changed his life…

And of course, Corey shares his story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

Plus, he gives a terrific piece of advice to young professionals trying to build their career in an increasingly unpredictable world, so be sure to stick around to the end of this longer episode. It’s worth it.

Connect With Corey

• Website: https://coreymccomb.com/
• Substack: https://substack.com/profile/22777129-corey-mccomb
• TEDx talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm4mFfIlwdU
• Book: https://amzn.to/3oY5tKa

Today’s guest Tamsen Webster, and she’s just as cool as her name suggests.

Tamsen is a message strategist. In a sentence, she helps experts make their ideas irresistible.

She’s the former executive producer of TEDx Cambridge, one of the legacy TEDx conferences and before that spent 13 years as a Weight Watchers leader.

But those of us in the industry know her as The Idea Whisperer.

I’m a huge fan of Tamsen and her work, and last year she finally released a book detailing her proprietary method for crafting ideas into irresistible messages. It’s called Find Your Red Thread.

I bought it, read it in one day, and immediately implemented it in my work as a speaker AND in my own coaching practice working with TEDx speakers and leaders.

The episode you’re about to hear is less an interview and more a conversation between two geeks over ideas, storytelling, and messaging.

Some topics we covered:

What is a red thread? Why are ideas so important? Behind-the-scenes look at the TEDx process. How to differentiate your idea from everyone else’s, when it seems like there are no new ideas left in the universe.

Tamsen explains the persuader’s paradox, which I thought would make a great name for an indie rock band. She also dives deep into why typical story structures just don’t work for normal, everyday situations and what we can do instead.

And of course, Tamsen shares her story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

This episode is dense and absolutely jam-packed. 

Connect with Tamsen:

• Website: https://TamsenWebster.com
• Find Your Red Thread: https://amzn.to/3qVY0va

Today’s guest Helen G. Sneed.

Helen is a career coach, HR consultant, and speaker.

She also founded Drive The Goal, a consulting firm that helps people and organizations take charge of their lives and career, and navigate change, where she is the Principal Partner.

Helen and I met when she hired me to speak at a fundraising event for the Connecticut State Colleges and Universities Foundation. At the time, she was the President of the foundation.

She has an Associate’s degree, a Bachelor’s Degree, and an MBA.

And, most notably, she was recently named one of Connecticut and Massachusetts 100 Women of Color.

So basically, she knows a lot. She’s done a lot. And we talked about a lot.

In this conversation Helen and I discussed how to fix your elevator speech, what philanthropy really is and how anyone can do it, even if you don’t have money, how to navigate health issues when the world is falling apart, diversity and inclusion in the modern workplace, her saxophone playing husband, and of course, Helen Shares her story of a chance encounter with lasting impact.

The kicker? She didn’t even know that’s the story she was telling.

Connect with Helen:

• Drive The Goal: https://drivethegoal.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helen-g-sneeddrivethegoal/

Today’s guest is Zoe Chance.

Zoe is one of the world’s foremost researchers and speakers on ethical influence and persuasion. 

She’s a beloved Yale professor who teaches the most popular course at the School of Management: Mastering Influence and Persuasion.

Her new book, Influence Is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen, is based on that course.

Zoe is also a dear friend and collaborator who helped me craft my now famous TEDx talk back in 2015. 

She is the first ever repeat guest on this podcast, having joined me way back in Season 1 when this show was called One New Person.

Interestingly, that interview came at a time when Zoe was at the very crossroads that eventually led to this book. And that’s where this conversation picks up.

We spoke about doing what you love, how to write an academic book that feels conversational and friendly, and why the book had to change completely in response to COVID. 

Diving into the book itself we focused largely on the power of framing as a tool of influence, which includes a discussion of mind readers, magicians, and gorillas. 

We also touched on how timing can be used to positively influence someone, and offer advice on how to stop turning people off by asking to “pick their brain” or “buy them a cup of coffee.”

Finally, Zoe offers one critical piece of advice to young professionals trying to navigate this crazy, ever-changing world.

I had the honor of reading Influence Is Your Superpower cover to cover as an advance publisher’s copy, and my one-sentence review is:

This book is Robert Cialdini for the kindness generation.

Grab your copy of Influence Is Your Superpower here: https://amzn.to/3qX4WrU 

Connect with Zoe:

• https://ZoeChance.com
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/zoebchance/

Today’s guest is Thomas Heaton.

Thomas is a landscape photographer and YouTuber. 

His YouTube channel has attracted over half a million subscribers and features   weekly video blogs of his photo shoots in some of the most stunning locations on earth.

I’m neither a photographer nor into nature. But there’s something magical about the way he films the process of spending hours and sometimes days in pursuit of a single photo.

I’ve been a subscriber and huge fan of Thomas since the early days of his channel, and it was such a treat to spend an hour discussing creativity as a serious pursuit.

Our conversation ranged from the power of publicly admitting your mistakes, to the battle against repetition in pursuit of expertise, how he approaches storytelling, getting into a flow state, the role of intentionality in creativity, loneliness, and the role of luck in success.

And of course, Thomas shares his story of a chance encounter with lasting impact, and gives one critical piece of advice to young professionals trying to make it in this crazy world.

Connect with Thomas

• https://ThomasHeaton.com
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ThomasHeatonPhoto

When you ask for feedback, you reinforce any existing power dynamic. When you ask for advice, you eliminate the power dynamic completely. People feel more comfortable giving advice, and you'll receive it better.

Blog version: https://brianmillerspeaks.com/stop-asking-for-feedback/ 

Video version: https://youtu.be/VkqVdbCeThg