It's International Masturbation Month!! My guest is Kya Blackstone.

 

Kya is a pleasure activist who believes that pleasure is a key component of living a wholehearted life. After noticing a gap in the market for intimate wellness products that focused on self-pleasure and catered to BIPOC women, Kya founded so(l)o.

 

so(l)o creates all-natural, sustainable intimate wellness products that are specifically created for self-pleasure. Kya was so passionate about so(l)o that she quit her corporate gig and moved to Berlin....after a great deal of strategy and thought, of course. You can follow Kya’s life in Berlin on @brooklyntoberlin and follow so(l)o @mysoloislove on Instagram.

 

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This episode features Dr Chelsia Potts, an educator and content creator. Dr Potts and host Kristen Thomas discussed sex and neurodivergency.

 

Have you found that when you're dating, it's easy to be all hot and heavy when you're still in the new relationship energy but then you suddenly feel disconnected? Are you overwhelmed once you have to merge the emotional and physical in a relationship? Worry that your autism or ADHD will prevent you from finding a caring and understanding partner? This episode is for you.

 

Topics include:

Aging, shifting, and unmasking - how we mourn removing our mask

Dating with autism or ADHD

Recognizing red flags

Learning to build connections

Overcoming shame

 

Find Dr Potts TikTok @heavyonthedr

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The conversation you are about to listen to between my guest D Rashaan Gilmore and I is...Maybe not going to make some of you very happy. Sorry, not sorry. I don't really care. We live in Missouri and we no longer have the time to mince words. Our conversation covered topics like houselessness, classism, voter apathy, and allyship.  

D Rashaan is a serial entrepreneur, community connector, organizer,  collaborator, and an Emmy Award winner. He is particularly passionate about making a difference and has found a home for his voice in service of marginalized and stigmatized communities.  He is the founder and CEO of BlaqOut, a grassroots movement organization that seeks to organize and mobilize the black LGBTQ community in Kansas City.

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I know I say this a lot, but I'm constantly excited about the guests that I have on the show. I'm extra excited about today's guest, Alicia Sinclair. She's also a Certified Sex Coach. We went through the same program at Sex Coach U. Sinclair is the CEO and founder of Children of the Revolution, which holds the brand's b vibe, Le Wand, and The Cowgirl.

She'd already been in the sex toy industry for a long time before becoming a Sexologist, and when she saw that there were some holes to fill in that industry (wink, wink), specifically about pleasure education, she got her certification and started her own companies, and a pleasure revolution while she's at it. 

She believes heavily that education and pleasure go hand in hand. If you don't feel like you have learned enough about anal from me and my podcast, then you need to check out their Anal Academy. 

Also since it's Women's History Month, I asked her about women in history that she looks up to. We also discussed overcoming vibrator objections, favorite positions for integrating vibes with a partner, and what's next in sex tech. 

If you are not local to the Kansas City area, or just have not had a chance to pick up your copy of The Pitch on newsstands, read my March column Still Got It: Aging doesn't have to slow you down in the bedroom.

 

When my guest today came over to my office to hang out and chill one day a couple of weeks ago, I was intrigued with her because it was refreshing that we had had some pretty similar experiences, but this also seemed like someone I could learn some lessons from. Ellie Berland is a sacred life and business coach, and she is a big believer in pretty much everything can be seen as divine - that even includes your kinky side. 

Her pendulum has swung from purity culture into the poly lifestyle, and then into swinging, and now, into a celibate lifestyle as she learns more about herself. We talked about a lot of things in this episode, including BDSM and finding a Dom, connecting to your body, and learning to captain her own ship. 

 

Find Ellie on Instagram or her BioPage. 

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Curator of the soon-to-be-unveiled KC Rainbow Tour Joel Barrett joined me on this episode of Keep Them Coming. Joel shared stories of this city's queer past, including the influential 1966 meeting of the North American Conference of Homophile Organizations or NACHO, pronounced NAY-KOE, which was the ember of activism that helped spark the Gay Rights Movement; stories of an open lesbian Bunny at the Playboy Club named Lea Hopkins; the Jazz District; the Gay and Lesbian Archives of Mid-America; and Womantown. We also discussed showing respect via pronouns, finding long-lost gay family, and Anita Bryant.

 

Find the KC Rainbow Tour on:

Instagram

JoelSpeaksOut.com

Happy Singles Appreciation Day! Enjoy this playlist Single and Vibin' on Spotify. 

Friend of the show Lucy Rowett, CSC primarily focuses on helping women and non-binary femmes with embodying pleasure. In this episode, Lucy and I are talking all about the variety of documentaries discussing sex cults and sex scandals, including NXIVM, Jerry Falwell Jr, Teal Swan, One Taste, among others. We covered some feel-good shows that are about sex, too, like How To Build A Sex Room and Goop Lab, as well as Sex, Love, and Goop. 

You can find Lucy at LucyRowett.com or Instagram.

Some of you are fresh out of Dry January and are wondering if you could be dating differently moving forward. Others of you have been sober for years and struggle with being bored on dates. Whether you're a sober dater or simply want fresh and creative date ideas, you'll love this episode of Keep Them Coming.

 

Melissa and Kristen discussed tips for talking to your date about not drinking, where to find people besides a bar, and what Melissa finds sexy in a man. She went on 66 first dates, so she's got some opinions!

 

Melissa Saubers is a Quantum Manifestation Teacher, Healer, Facilitator, and Coach, who has developed a holistic manifestation and healing approach rooted in science, psychology, and spirituality. She has a fascination for the subconscious mind, the quantum field, manifestation, and expanding consciousness and helps clients on their healing, expansion, and manifestation journeys with a variety of healing modalities including breathwork, quantum hypnosis, hypnotherapy, cacao, and energy healing.   Melissa hosts many events around the Kansas City area including the weekly love-donation-based Sunset Breathwork event every Tuesday night at 7pm. Melissa can be found online at HealandExpand.com and on Instagram @MelissaSaubers   Listen to Kristen's Red Light Special or Singles Appreciation playlist on Spotify.  

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Ever wonder why men seem to be Mr. Wonderful at first but really start to show their asses after a few months? It's as if they couldn't keep up the act once they thought they had you hooked. You may have found a selfish short-term thinker rather than a generous long-term thinker. 

Chantal Heide - AKA Canada's Dating Coach - is a dating and relationship coach and expert. She's the author of 10 books (plus two workbooks), and it's her book, No More Assholes, that caught Kristen's attention on TikTok. Chantal is so good at dissecting situations and behavior. She mixes the nerdy science-y stuff with romantic actions to help people change their relationship trajectories. 

Topics include: how to stop fighting with your spouse, why no kissing for 90 days may be the bold dating move to change your life, dating after divorce, addressing mismatched libido, and much more.

 

Find Chantal Heide on TikTok  or Instagram, or grab her books on Amazon. 

Read my January 2023 column from The Pitch - Please Cancel My Monthly Subscription 

Kristen is joined today by friend and fellow Sexologist Mieke Stapelberg. They met through Sex Coach U at a SAR (Sexual Attitude Reassessment) workshop. What better time to make a friend, than when you're being your most vulnerable and exposing yourself to new things?

In addition to talking about her some of her brands - including Mind Sex and Karma Mind - Mieke and Kristen talked about mental health, bias, stigma, self-reflection, and the recent Andrew Tate scandal, of course. They also discussed ethical porn and supporting sex workers. So there's a little bit of something in here for everyone!

Find Mieke on Instagram @karmamind_

 

Back on Keep Them Coming for another episode - it's my friend, colleague, and co-host Kristine D'Angelo. She's a Portland based Certified Sex Coach and we are hosting a couples intimacy retreat in Puerto Vallarta, MX in a few months. We discussed who our retreat is for and some of the topics we will cover. If you and your spouse or partner really love each other, buuut - come to the retreat and we will help you over come that "but".

Also included - responsive desire, being an interesting partner, extreme unity vs extreme autonomy, empty nesters and divorce, and moving beyond talking about it to fixing it!

Visit rejuvenateintimacy.com for more information or to complete the interest form. You can get more of Kristine by going to doyoursexlifeafavor.com