In today’s episode, we tackle death with Jodi Wellman. Jodi is a former executive turned executive coach. She has a Master of Applied Positive Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania, where she's an instructor in the master's program and a trainer in the world renowned Penn Resilience Program. And she is the author of You Only Die Once: How to Make It to the End with No Regrets. 

Jodi Wellman reveals essential strategies for transforming your professional stagnation into dynamic success and underscores the importance of quantifying your remaining Monday mornings to infuse purpose into your career, eliminating regrets before they hinder your progress.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• How can thinking about death enhance your career and life ambitions?
• Why should you calculate how many Mondays you have left?

• Focus on this to improve your performance and happiness at work – 10:15
• Gain insights on the value of time and how precise awareness of it can enhance your decision-making and prioritization at the managerial or C-suite level

• Most people are held back from success by their ‘dead zones’ – 18:10
• What are 'dead zones' and how can identifying them transform your professional growth and personal fulfillment?
• How can facing the reality of mortality inspire urgent career and personal development?

• How does the pandemic influence our perception of time and opportunities for growth? – 26:17
• Understand the psychological impacts of COVID-19 on our ambitions and social interactions, with tips for re-engaging with life and work post-pandemic.

• How do you bake your own 'happiness pie' and take charge of your life satisfaction? – 31:19
• How do you start moving from 'dead zones' to 'astonishingly alive zones'?

• How can the concept of fighting for your life goals redefine your approach to career and personal ambitions? – 42:39
• What is the importance of self-compassion and forgiveness in pursuing a life without regrets?

Episode Sponsors:

• Indeed
• Kajabi

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle mind magic and manifestation with Dr. James Doty. James is an inventor, an entrepreneur, and philanthropist. He is a clinical professor of neurosurgery at Stanford University and the founder and director of Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education with the Dalai Lama himself as the founding benefactor. His new book is titled Mind Magic: The Neuroscience of Manifestation and How It Changes Everything. 

We break down the systems in the brain responsible for shaping your beliefs and actions, how you can harness the power of your subconscious mind to reach your goals faster, why you need to visualize your success in detail to make it a reality, And James shares his own experiences with the magic of our mind.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What is mind magic and what does science say about the legitimacy of manifestation?

• This is where most people go wrong trying to manifest their desires – 10:15
• Where do most of us go wrong with manifestation versus what should we be focusing on with our manifestation to actually be whole, to be living a rich and fulfilling life?
• How can we use our neural networks to increase the chances of manifesting what we want?

• The secret to focusing in a world of neverending distractions – 24:17
• How are self-compassion, focus, and manifestation linked together?
• How should you define success if you are trying to manifest success for yourself or others?

• What should you focus on if you want to manifest what you want – 34:21
• What is the most important aspect of life you need to focus on if you want physical and mental health and a long life?

• How does commitment to action transform intentions into reality? – 39:06

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle the world of high stakes hostage negotiation in a divided world with Scott Walker. Scott is one of the world’s most experienced kidnapped-for-ransom negotiators. He served 16 years as a Scotland Yard detective specializing in covert policing, then supported organizations, governments, and private individuals in negotiating the release of hostages all over the world, and is the author of his the latest book, Order Out of Chaos: A Kidnap Negotiator's Guide to Influence and Persuasion.

You’re going to learn how to prepare for high stakes situations like a hostage negotiator. We discuss how to quickly build rapport with people that you do not share common interests with, what to listen for in negotiations to create a winning outcome, how to develop your emotional intelligence to be successful under stress, and the secrets hostage negotiators use to bring back hostages safely.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• How frequently do people get kidnapped and held for ransom?
• What are the biggest challenges that hostage negotiators face?

• The first 30 seconds of a hostage situation are crucial for this reason – 15:53
• What secret do hostage negotiators use to rapidly build trust with anyone?
• What 30 second practice do hostage negotiators use to prepare themselves for every high stakes situation?

• What consequences do kidnappers actually face? – 24:25
• How do you cultivate the right mindset to be a master negotiator?
• What can you do to predict the biggest hurdles you’ll need to overcome in any negotiation?
• What are the 3 elements to every negotiation and how can you use them in your everyday life to build strong relationships?

• Most people mistakenly think this is when the negotiation ends – 39:34
• How should you think about negotiations on a short- and long-term basis to make sure you don’t hurt your reputation or future potential opportunities?

• Hostage negotiators have to care about the kidnappers – 48:36
• How do hostage negotiators raise their self awareness before entering high stakes situations?
• How do you master your emotions like a hostage negotiator by simply asking yourself specific questions?
• What are the biggest takeaways from Order Out of Chaos: A Kidnap Negotiator's Guide to Influence and Persuasion?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle building relationships in a divided world with Dr. Kurt Gray. Kurt is an award-winning researcher and moral psychologist with deep insights into human behavior and polarization. As a professor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, he directs the Deepest Beliefs Lab and the Center for the Science of Moral Understanding. He is also the author of The Mind Club: Who Thinks, What Feels, and Why It Matters, exploring the intricacies of how we perceive and judge others in society. 

Have you ever considered how rising polarization affects our ability to forge strong, meaningful relationships? What if bridging the vast divide between differing viewpoints could be achieved by examining our moral compass and the inherent blind spots it creates? Dive into a compelling discussion with Dr. Kurt Gray, who sheds light on the subtle yet profound ways morality shapes our perceptions of others.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What are Dr. Gray's strategies for strengthening relationships across ideological divides?
• How do our default settings of fear and the search for allies affect our political and social views?

• This is why most people can’t engage in tough conversations – 14:09
• Why is it challenging to discuss politics and morality today? 
• What are the key strategies for overcoming polarization and enhancing communication in today's divided world?

• The secret to bridging political polarization – 24:38
• Why is validating someone's views crucial in conversations, and how can it be done without agreeing?
• Why are personal stories more powerful than facts in changing perspectives?

• The evolving nature of political identities – 36:17
• How have our political identities evolved over time, and what does that mean for our current views?
• How significant is the overlap of values shared between different political parties, and why is it often overlooked?
• What misconceptions do we hold about political polarization, and how can understanding the past help us better navigate the present?

• The predator vs prey narrative in politics – 47:17
• How does viewing political opponents as predators or prey affect our ability to engage in meaningful conversations?
• What are the 3 steps to connecting with people who you disagree with?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle the Ask Approach with Jeff Wetzler. Jeff is a world expert in learning and human potential, has more than 25 years' experience in business and education as a management consultant at the world's top organizations, and is the author of his latest book, Ask: Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs In Leadership and Life. 

Have you ever pondered why analytical thinkers often find themselves at a crossroads in communication and networking? What if the key to unlocking exceptional leadership and life-changing relationships lies in the questions we ask? How can shifting our approach from problem-solving to curiosity-driven conversations revolutionize our connections? Dive deep with us as we explore the Ask Approach, a transformative framework designed to bridge the gap between analytical prowess and emotional intelligence.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• Who is Jeff Wetzler, and how can his "Ask Approach" transform your leadership skills and life?
• What holds people back from sharing vital information, and how does it affect decision-making?

• The secret to strengthening your curiosity muscle – 10:52
• Why is curiosity essential for building stronger personal and professional relationships?
• How can curiosity unlock problem-solving and collaboration in the workplace?

• Make people feel safe enough to tell you anything – 17:41
• What can you do if you want to make people feel safe and comfortable telling you information they normally would not?

• How to start on the right foot in a new management position – 24:29
• What questions can you ask to make sure your team feels safe following your leadership and comfortable enough to help you understand where the weaknesses are in the organization? 

• Is it possible to ask too many questions – 34:14
• What types of questions foster deeper understanding?
• How can you listen more effectively?
• How can reflecting and reconnecting based on conversations enhance your communication skills?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle attachment with Nicholas Epley. Nick is an expert on human behavior and decision making, a professor of behavioral science and faculty director for decision research at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business, the author of the highly acclaimed book Mindwise: Why We Misunderstand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. 

Ever wonder why some people excel in social situations while others struggle? How can understanding the biases that lead us to believe we're effective mind readers of friends and strangers alike transform our interactions? And what simple strategies can we employ to build real connections quickly? Join us as Nick Epley sheds light on these intriguing questions, offering insights from his acclaimed book "Mindwise" and revealing the secret to truly understanding what others think, believe, feel, and want.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What is the biggest problem that stops us from being able to better understand and predict what other people think?
• How well do we really know what others think and feel?

• Dispelling the biggest myth about our brains – 13:36
• Why does the biggest myth about how we use our brains continue to persist and why is it wrong?
• How does perspective drastically change one person’s understanding of a situation and what can you do to alleviate the inevitable friction that difference in perspective causes?

• The biggest hurdles most people struggle with when reading minds – 18:55
• What are the dangers of typing vs. talking in our ability to convey sarcasm and understand each other?
• How does our prediction of future behaviors or reactions in extreme situations often mislead us?
• When are stereotypes useful and when are they harmful?

• Dispelling the biggest myth about political polarization – 35:47
• Is the country actually becoming more polarized politically or is something else going on that makes us think we’re becoming more polarized?

• The importance of direct communication most people miss – 41:59
• What is the best way to make any interaction with a stranger into a positive one that can lead to friendship or romance? 

• Most people won’t do this to create deeper relationships in their lives – 58:40
• What do most people avoid doing even though it’s the best way to create the deep relationships they want in their lives?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we dive deep into rewriting your life story with AJ, Johnny, and Michael Herold. 

How do you rewrite your personal narrative to align with your core values and set meaningful goals for your future? Can understanding and rewriting your story spark real change in your life? This episode of The Art of Charm delves into these critical questions, offering you a unique opportunity to explore the power of storytelling in personal development.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• How do our brains use stories to predict the future, and why is this relevant to you?
• How can acknowledging both positive and negative stories shape your future?

• The Biggest Myth About Rewriting Your Story – 10:36
• Why doesn't changing your past narrative work, and what should you do instead?
• Why isn't revising your past the key to a brighter future?

• The Most Important Step to Take When Rewriting Your Story – 23:24
• Why is your next action step more important than your past narrative?
• Values vs. Goals: How do they work together to attract success into your life?

• Recognizing and Acting on Choice Points – 31:00
• What are action points, and how can they be game-changers in your life?
• How to deal with resistance from others as you start to change your narrative?

• The Critical Role of Self-Compassion in Rewriting Your Story – 37:25
• Why is self-compassion important in rewriting your story, and how can you cultivate an empowering level of self-compassion?
• How can embracing your new narrative and taking action today transform your life?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we dive deep into the essence of leadership and personal transformation with a stellar lineup of guests. Brad Lomenick brings his expertise on impactful leadership and personal growth, drawing from his experience as a consultant and author of influential books including H3 Leadership: Be Humble. Stay Hungry. Always Hustle. We hear from Brett Crozier, whose distinguished career in the US Navy offers invaluable lessons on resilience and integrity. Dan Luna, with his rich background as a Navy SEAL and leadership coach, shares insights on developing leadership skills under pressure. John Mackey, the visionary behind Whole Foods Market, discusses the principles of conscious capitalism and leadership that have guided his successful career. Leadership expert Patrick Lencioni provides practical advice on building effective teams and organizations, while Jake Wood, co-founder of Team Rubicon, talks about the power of vulnerability and integrity in leadership. 

How can you bust leadership myths and embrace humility, hunger, and hustle to drive success? What are the key traits all leaders need, and how can embracing vulnerability and integrity transform your leadership style? This episode of The Art of Charm answers these questions and more, providing you with the tools and insights needed to become a stronger, more conscious leader.

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What are common misconceptions about leadership roles and titles?
• Why is self-leadership crucial in today's career landscape?

• Most people don’t understand this about group dynamics and leadership frames – 10:10
• How does the concept of "herd mentality" apply to leadership and fitting into social environments?
• Why is focusing on your team or people fundamental to leadership success?

• How do you master leadership skills in your everyday life? – 19:00
• Why is practice crucial in developing leadership skills?
• What makes conscious leadership different from conventional leadership?

• How effective leaders deal with criticism and their inner critic – 29:44
• What can you do to not feel anonymous in your organization and not be that cog?
• How can leaders effectively show vulnerability to their team?
• What are the three things employees need to avoid feeling miserable at work?

• Leading with integrity and handling no’s – 39:05
• What is the importance of facing rejection and criticism for a leader?
• How can leaders remain steadfast and true to their values in the face of adversity?

• Traits that make leaders effective – 47:48
• How do humility and vulnerability contribute to leadership effectiveness?
• How should leaders approach crisis situations to maintain team confidence and trust?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle attachment with Dr. Judy Ho. Dr. Ho is a clinical neuropsychologist and a tenured professor and researcher at Pepperdine University, works as a forensic expert and media consultant, and last time she joined us to talk about her book, Stop Self-Sabotage, and today, she's back to talk about her latest book, The New Rules of Attachment: How to Heal Your Relationships, Reparent Your Inner Child, and Secure Your Life Vision.

Everyone knows how attachment styles influence romantic relationships, but how do they hold you back in your career, why do you need to understand your attachment style to build healthy relationships, and what can you do to change your attachment style and raise children with secure attachment styles?

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What is attachment theory and what are the 4 attachment styles?
• How do parenting styles produce different attachment styles in their children? 

• How to avoid raising insecure children – 13:14
• What do you need to avoid to raise children to have a secure attachment style? 
• If you have an insecure attachment style, what can you do to change it to a secure attachment style?

• How do you change your attachment style – 20:13
• What can you do to break the pattern of avoidant attachment and develop a secure attachment style?
• What are the strengths and weaknesses of the avoidant attachment style?
• How do I connect with an avoidant attachment style?

• The secret to living with an insecure attachment style – 33:14
• What simple 10 second exercise can you do to accept your attachment style while you’re working to change it so it doesn’t sabotage your relationships?

• How to deal with your partner’s attachment style – 40:23
• What can you do if you’re putting in a lot of work to understand your attachment style and your partner’s, but your partner isn’t interested in doing the same work?
• What are you supposed to do when a family member’s attachment style creates conflict with yours? 

• Breaking free of your avoidant attachment style in your career – 49:33
• How does your avoidant attachment style sabotage your career and your ability to advance?
• Should everyone be striving to have a secure attachment style?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Bombas crafts ridiculously comfortable socks, tees, and underwear, and for every item sold, they donate one to help those facing homelessness — over 100 million essentials donated so far. Not only are their clothes designed for ultimate comfort with features like arch support and buttery-soft fabric, but they also ensure customer satisfaction with a 100% Happiness Guarantee for hassle-free returns and exchanges. Ready to get comfy and give back? Head over to Bombas.com/CHARM and use code CHARM for twenty percent off your first purchase!

$75 SPONSORED JOB CREDIT to upgrade your job post at Indeed.com/CHARM. Offer good for a limited time.

Ready to start your ecommerce business? Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/charm. Grow your business–no matter what stage you’re in.

Curious about your influence level? 

Get your Influence Index Score today!

Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? 

That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? 

Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle slow productivity with Cal Newport. Cal is a leading productivity expert and the author of several best selling books, including a A World Without Email: Reimagining Work in an Age of Communication Overload, Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World, Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World, and So Good They Can't Ignore You: Why Skills Trump Passion in the Quest for Work You Love. His newest book is titled Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout.

What if slowing down was actually the secret to achieving more? In this episode, we dive into the intriguing world of slow productivity: Can embracing a slower pace truly catapult your career success? What are the three foundational principles of slow productivity, and how can you apply them to revolutionize your work ethic? Moreover, why is transforming your relationship with productivity essential for not just professional achievement, but for crafting a fulfilling life?

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• What is pseudo productivity and how does being pseudo productive at work damage your relationships and personal life?
• What’s wrong with how we think about transparency at work and what is the best level of transparency to maximize team productivity?

• The evolution of workplace productivity – 13:49
• Why did productivity decrease when we have so many tools to be more productive?
• What can you eliminate from your daily schedule to be 10x more productive than your competition?
• How do you limit communication to maximize productivity?

• The reason most people can’t leave their work at the office – 28:18
• Why is it important to slow down if you want to increase productivity?
• What are the 3 biggest takeaways from studying traditional knowledge workers that you can use to maximize productivity?

• Can you be more productive without using any email? – 40:45
• What happpened the productivity of 12 employees in a study where the experimenters disabled their email accounts?
• What simple framework can you implement on your team to improve transparency, reduce stress, increase productivity, and increase the collaboration between employees and managers?

• The little known technique to most effectively distribute your team’s workload – 52:23
• Why do rude people get promoted faster?
• What mistake do people make that prevents them from getting promoted without even knowing it?

• How do you apply slow productivity to being a more productive writer – 1:08:16
• What principles of slow productivity should you apply to your writing practice to increase your productivity and efficiency as a writer?
• What simple trick can you implement in your hybrid work situation to decrease time spent on email, increase communication effectivity, increase meeting effectivity, increase productivity, and increase deep work?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we tackle meaning and purpose with Samuel T Wilkinson. Sam is a professor of psychiatry at Yale University, an associate director of the Yale Depression Research Program, and the author of his latest book Purpose: What Evolution and Human Nature Imply about the Meaning of Our Existence.

In this episode, we explore the two sides of human nature and how they guide us to find our true purpose. We dive into free will's role in achieving a good life, look at how committed relationships affect our happiness, and share new scientific findings on evolution that help explain our life's meaning. 

What to Listen For

• Introduction – 0:00
• How does understanding the duality of human nature enhance your leadership and communication strategy?
• Is our success and decision-making process truly random, or is there an underlying order that can be leveraged for personal growth?

• How do different religious beliefs about free will influence our life choices and purpose? – 14:48
• Can exploring various beliefs on free will unlock a deeper sense of purpose and direction in life and career?

• What are the implications of Monogamy vs. Promiscuity on society and personal well-being? – 20:10
• How do shifting norms around relationships impact societal stability and individual well-being?
• How do relationships define our happiness and purpose, according to the longest running study on human development?

• How do deep meaningful relationships fuel our search for purpose? – 33:00
• How do relationships and attachment theory play a critical role in finding purpose and fulfillment?
• What are the actionable steps to deepen your connections and harness the power of meaningful relationships in your personal and professional life? 

• How does parenthood reshape our priorities and enhance our sense of purpose? – 40:16
• How does parenthood transform one's priorities and contribute to a greater sense of purpose and societal contribution?
• What are the unique rewards and challenges of raising children, and how do they impact personal growth and career advancement?

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices