Navigating the holidays as a grandparent can be tricky, but holding plans with open hands can make all the difference. In this episode, we talk about how to foster unity, embrace flexibility, and keep a spirit of grace at the center of holiday gatherings. Whether you're a mom of grown children or still in the thick of raising kids at home, Karen offers practical tips to help you approach the season with love and understanding.

Episode Recap:

4:56 Grandparents need to hold holiday plans with open hands

7:45 Remember what it was like to be a young adult and all of the pressures they are facing

10:00 Be open and flexible to new traditions

13:00 Enjoy the kids when they are around and be okay if they are not present some years

14:55 Learn how to communicate plans early 

16:30 It’s okay for grandparents to spoil the grandkids and overindulge them once a year!

19:30 Ask your grown children, “what can I do to make holidays easier/better for you?” 

23:00 The holidays aren’t about exactly ‘when’ or ‘how,’ they are about being together

Scripture for Reflection:

Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV): "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others."

Questions for Discussion:

1. In what ways can you be more understanding of the pressures your grown children face during the holiday season?
2. What new traditions could you embrace that might help create a more joyful and flexible holiday experience for everyone?
3. How can you learn to hold your holiday traditions with open hands? Is there anything specific you know will be hard to let go of? 
4. What steps can you take to communicate our holiday plans early, while still being considerate of everyone’s needs and desires?
5. How can you maintain a spirit of grace if plans change or things don't go as expected?

Resources:

Download the BOAW Moms app (for FREE!) [App Store] [Google Play]

Today, DeDe Wilbanks joins us to explore how we can set healthy boundaries around the technology in our homes. With John 10:10 as our guide, DeDe reminds us of our God-given role to protect our children's hearts and minds from the addictive nature of technology. While we can't control everything, we can be intentional about setting limits that nurture our families, trusting God with the rest.

Episode Recap:

• 4:30 What downtime and screen time parameters do you put on your devices? 
• 9:43 Is there a right age to give kids a phone? 
• 13:09 Why do screen time limits matter? 
• 15:15 What mistakes have you made when it comes to technology in your home?
• 19:10 I had to learn to enjoy the “no”
• 22:00 How do you actually set limits on the iphone? 
• 31:22 What simple practical tips can you offer to get started?

Scripture for Reflection:

John 10:10 (NIV) "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. What boundaries are in place around the tech that your kids have access to? (Games, ipads, TV, phones, etc.)
2. Have you made any mistakes with the technology you have allowed in your home? 
3. How do you model healthy technology habits for your children? 
4. What challenges do you face when setting screen time limits, and how do you handle them?
5. What action steps are you taking after listening to this episode? 

Resources:

• Download the BOAW Moms app (for FREE!) [App Store] [Google Play]
• The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt

Election Day can bring a lot of uncertainty and even fear into our lives. Today, Karen and Emily remind us to keep our focus on God, no matter who ends up in the White House. They encourage us to pray for our leaders and show us how to foster peace, especially if our families are divided on political views. Karen shares powerful biblical truths to help us navigate the ups and downs of the election season with faith and grace, reminding us that our hope is always in Christ and that we are citizens of heaven.

Episode Recap:

7:12 How should Christians approach political elections?

10:20 What does Jesus say about engaging with governments and politics? 

13:04 Daniel 2:21 says God “deposes kings and raises up others”

14:30 We have to focus our eyes on God and not our circumstances

15:45 Go vote! And also, pray for our leaders

17:45 Look at the story of Nebuchadnezzer, God can turn the hearts of evil leaders

20:39 We can have different opinions and still love one another

21:58 Your children are watching you

Scripture for Reflection:

Romans 13:1 (NIV) "Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God."

Questions for Discussion:

1. Do you enjoy talking about politics, would you rather ignore it, or do you fall somewhere in between? 
2. Has this election season disrupted your internal peace?
3. Do you pray for the leaders in our country? Would you be willing to commit to praying for the President Elect until Inauguration Day? 
4. Did any of the verses Karen mentioned during this episode resonate with you? What is something you can do to practically apply the message of this conversation? 

Resources:

Download the BOAW Moms app (for FREE!) [App Store] [Google Play]

“You just have to last one second longer…” If you are constantly fighting discipline battles these days, we hope those words stay with you long after this episode! In this conversation, Karen tackles questions about disciplining your younger children. From chaos in the car, to rough play, to bad behavior that only happens at school, Karen offers practical advice for finding consequences that work for your child.

Episode Recap:

6:37 My four year old is constantly getting in trouble at school - what can we do?

12:30 Car rides are the worst! How can I stop the cycle of craziness?

17:00 You just have to last one second longer than they do!

18:25 My son plays too rough at school - does he need therapy? 

21:30 How do I know which things are discipline worthy and which things I should let go? 

27:18 My son gets really angry- we don’t want to punish him for feeling emotions, but know we need to find ways to help him regulate, any advice?

Scripture for Reflection:

Proverbs 29:17 (NIV) “Discipline your children, and they will give you peace; they will bring you the delights you desire.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. What are some of the biggest discipline challenges you face with your young children?
2. Have you found any specific consequences that seem to work well with your child? What hasn’t worked as well?
3. How do you decide which behaviors are worth disciplining and which ones to let go?
4. How do you handle situations where your child gets very angry? Are there strategies that help them regulate their emotions?

Resources:

• Send Karen your questions using the BOAW Moms app (for FREE!) [App Store] [Google Play]
• Raising Emotionally Strong Boys by David Thomas: https://amzn.to/48r4ZkZ
• Listen to Wire Talk episode 347 with David Thomas: https://wiretalk.transistor.fm/episodes/347-raising-emotionally-strong-boys-with-david-thomas
• A Grown Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring: https://amzn.to/3YmsRlo
• Survival Guide to Motherhood: https://amzn.to/3NKXXyd

Are your kids’ personalities shaped by their birth order? In today’s episode, Karen and Emily explore how birth order influences personality. They share insights from their own families and tackle questions like, “How do I help my oldest think of others before herself?” and “How can I teach my daughter to let go of things without holding on to everything?” Plus, Emily talks about how she’s using the BOAW Moms app to keep up with studies and episodes!

Episode Recap:

2:00 Emily is loving using the BOAW Moms app to watch studies and look up podcast episodes

3:45 Karen and Emily share how their personalities were shaped by their birth order 

7:13 Is it possible to avoid reinforcing birth order stereotypes as a parent?

10:25 How do I help my 5 year old let go of things? She wants to hold onto all the things!

15:24 How do I help my oldest daughter think of others before herself? 

20:45 How do I help nurture my daughter’s kindness? 

24:50 Send in your question on the app using the “Ask Karen” section

Scripture for Reflection:

Galatians 6:9 (NASB) “Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. How do you think birth order has influenced your children’s personalities? Can you see any traits that match typical birth order stereotypes?
2. How do you encourage your child to let go of unnecessary items or habits without making them feel pressured?
3. What did you think of Karen’s story about taking Kelsey to the Dominican Republic and the change she saw in her heart afterwards? Is that something you have done or would consider doing with your children? 
4. Karen mentioned several times that some issues we see in our kids are heart issues while others are merely maturity issues (things they will grow out of)- do you feel like you can tell the difference in your children? 

Resources:

• Check out Karen’s new study: The Counter-Intuitive Parent on Right Now Media or from the BOAW Moms store 
• Download the BOAW Moms app: [App Store] [Google Play]
• Kevin Leman’s Birth Order book: https://amzn.to/3AdPCzI

“There is nothing that beats conversation with our kids.” Today we’re chatting with Erin Mashaw about the new book she co-authored, A Student’s Guide to Sexual Integrity. We touch on purity culture, pornography, and the constantly shifting cultural values around us. Erin shared the importance of having small conversations early and often and offered practical tips for getting over the awkwardness! Our hope is that you will be encouraged to engage in new conversations this week in your home and feel equipped that YOU are the best source of information for your child. Psst - pop some earbuds in for this one!

Episode Recap:

• 3:20 What is the difference between integrity and purity? 
• 6:54 ‘The Talk’ is no longer one marathon session, it’s simpler than that! 
• 8:30: Is it possible to make these conversations less awkward?
• 11:37 Your mind is your most important sex organ 
• 14:00 Teach your kids to live by the Integrity Code
• 18:30 How do we share the truth that the historical biblical sexual ethic is loving and not exclusive with kids who are seeing something different all around them?
• 20:30 It’s parents’ job to be the first voice speaking to our children a consistent message on sexuality
• 24:00 What do moms need to know about protecting our (even young) kids from being sexualized online? 
• 30:10 It’s never too late to start this conversation! 
• 33:00 God is writing your child’s story and His Holy Spirit will guide you as you lead your kids in this area of their lives

Scripture for Reflection:

Deuteronomy 11:18-19 (NIV): “Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. When did you begin talking with your kids about topics related to sex? If you haven’t started yet, what’s holding you back? Did this episode encourage you to initiate those conversations in your home?
2. How do you define sexual integrity versus purity, and why do you think this distinction is important when talking with your children? What stood out to you in Erin’s explanation?
3. How can you be proactive in protecting your children from exposure to inappropriate content online? What strategies have worked for you, or what new steps could you take based on the information shared in this episode?
4. What does it look like to trust God with your child’s journey while still being intentional about shaping their understanding of sexual integrity

Resources:

• Check out Karen’s new study: The Counter-Intuitive Parent on Right Now Media or from the BOAW Moms store 
• Grab a copy of A Student’s Guide to Sexual Integrity 
• Jim Burns book, God Made Your Body, How God Makes Babies
• More resources from HomeWord ministry: https://homeword.com/ 
• Download the BOAW Moms app for FREE [App Store] [Google Play]

When your kids are little, the challenges of day-to-day parenting often pit one spouse against another. Today Karen and Emily are answering questions from weary moms. They discuss practical ways you can connect with your spouse, strategies for handling the stress that comes with parenting young children, and remind us of the importance of prioritizing our husband’s needs during this season of life.

Episode Recap:

4:50 BIG announcement coming later this month - get the app to be the first to know 

10:45 How do we find time to connect as spouses with 3 little kids at home? 

15:05: Help! My 3 yr old twins are pitting us against one another! 

17:14 Our marriage is struggling! We need help. 

22:20 Ask your spouse: what is one way I can love you better this month? 

25:20 I want to move back to where my family lives. What do you think we should do?

Scripture for Reflection:

Mark 10:9 (NIV): “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. How do you currently prioritize connection with your spouse while raising young children? What practical strategies have worked for you, and where do you feel there’s room for improvement?
2. How do you and your spouse handle conflict when your children (especially young ones) try to pit you against one another? Do you feel like you have a united front, or is this something you struggle with?
3. What’s one way you could better support your husband’s needs during this busy season of life? Have you asked him how you can show love to him in the coming weeks?
4. When making major family decisions, such as moving or changing jobs, how do you and your spouse communicate and weigh each other’s opinions? What steps do you take to ensure that both of your voices are heard?

Resources:

• Download the BOAW Moms app for FREE [App Store] [Google Play]
• Watch the Parenting Together curriculum in the app! [App Store] [Google Play]

Understanding how your child is wired can be a key to resolving conflict in your home! In today's episode, Karen dives into the dynamics of family conflict and emphasizes how important it is to recognize your child's personality type. By taking the time to understand their unique traits, we can cultivate patience and empathy in our relationships. Join us as we explore practical ways to bear with one another instead of butting heads!

Episode Recap:

6:08 I’m worried about my 9 yr old son’s lack of sociability…should I be? 

9:05 My daughter and I are constantly butting heads! Help!

12:15 What are the four core needs of the Red personality? 

14:08 How did your husband being away for so long affect your children and the home? 

18:32 My 1st grade daughter’s social awkwardness is affecting her relationships, what can I do?

Scripture for Reflection:

Ephesians 4:2 (NIV): Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.

Questions for Discussion:

1. How well do you know each of your children’s personalities? Share with the group the personalities of each of your family members. 
2. Do any of the personalities in your family butt heads more so than others? 
3. Can you see how taking personalities into account could create a more peaceful home? 
4. Refer to the four needs of each personality type in the resource packet linked below: do any needs stand out that you could work to be more mindful of in your parenting?  

Resources:

• Download the BOAW Moms app for FREE [App Store] [Google Play]
• Not sure your child’s color? Take our Colors Personality quiz
• Print off the FREE personality resource packet from BOAW

Today we’re diving into the idea of being a countercultural parent. Join us as Karen shares how important it is to parent in a way that aligns with God’s will instead of seeking the approval of others. From practical tips on renewing your mind to choosing God as your guiding “North Star,” Karen offers encouragement to moms who may feel out of step with the world – but exactly in step with God’s design.

Episode Recap:

3:51 Karen shares about her newest curriculum, The Counter Intuitive Parent

8:36 How have you seen parenting trends/choices change over the years?

11:38 Were you always countercultural as a parent or did you change as you realized you needed to parent differently from the world? 

16:25 What worldly patterns do you see affecting families right now? 

19:05 What can a mom do today to renew her mind? 

23:00 God is our “North Star” as believers

26:30 There is a lot on the horizon for BOAW Moms this year! 

Scripture for Reflection:

Romans 12:2 (NIV) – "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Galatians 1:10 (NIV) - “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. What parenting “trends” have you noticed in the circles you are parenting in these days? Do you feel pressure to conform to any of them? 
2. Karen spoke about renewing your mind and making choices for your family based on God’s will rather than the world’s expectations. How can you practically begin to “renew your mind” in your daily parenting?
3. In what ways do you feel countercultural as a parent? Have there been moments where you doubted your approach because it went against what society expects?
4. How can you make God your “North Star” in your decision-making as a parent? What are some distractions that keep you from doing this, and how can you overcome them?

Resources:

• Download the Birds on a Wire Moms app now for FREE wherever you get your apps: [App Store] [Google Play]
• Check out The Counter Intuitive Parent available now through Right Now Media): https://app.rightnowmedia.org/en/content/details/883497

Today Karen is answering questions from moms whose kids are in college or working and living on their own for the first time. She shares how to support them without enabling them, how to gently guide them toward wise-decision making, and how to encourage them toward maturity while simultaneously stepping back. She also reminds us that now, more than ever, is the time to get on your knees and PRAY for your kids! Moms, this season is hard, but the fruit of these years is worth the investment of time and energy. 

Episode Recap:

3:41 How do I help my college-age daughter who is already struggling with time management while she’s away? She’s calling me in tears weekly!

8:00 I feel like my son is growing apart from us as a young adult living in another state. Is this normal? How can I adjust my mindset? 

13:02 My daughter calls me all the time about every little thing now that she’s living on her own. How can I help her be more confident in her decision making? 

17:18 I think my son could be classified as “failure to launch” at this point in time. How can I get him to think about his future seriously?!

Scripture for Reflection:

Philippians 1:9-10 (NIV) – "And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ."

Questions for Discussion:

1. Were there any suggestions Karen offered during this episode that surprised you? Which ones did you love? 
2. When your young adult is constantly seeking advice, how do you balance offering support with encouraging them to develop their own confidence in decision-making?
3. Do you struggle with feelings of separation or distance when your child is living far from home? What are some practical things you could do (besides visiting!) to close that relational gap? 
4. What are some practical ways we can support our young adults in their independence without overstepping or enabling them?
5. In what specific ways can you be praying for your young adult as they transition into greater independence? Do you think prayer influences your ability to trust God in this season?

Resources:

• Jump in on the Survival Guide to Motherhood study this fall! Today is the last day to register: boaw.mom/SGTM
• Download the Birds on a Wire Moms app FOR FREE wherever you get your apps! 
• Come hear Karen teach at an event near you: https://birdsonawiremoms.com/events

Literacy coach Welsley Jongko joins us in the studio today to talk about the process of learning to read and to encourage those of us who have beginning readers at home! She explains the current reading crisis in America and the simple but effective things parents can do to support their children on their way to become lifelong readers. There are so many great tips and resources shared in the conversation today, be sure you check the links in today’s show notes! 

Episode Recap:

2:11 Welsley is a literacy coach supporting teachers in the K-5 school system

4:00 Karen shares the story of Abby’s dyslexia diagnosis 

7:56 Tips for parents who are already overwhelmed by the new school year

9:40 How can parents help foster a love of learning in their child? 

12:12 Is there a difference between a late learner and a struggling reader?

16:00 What are the red flags your child is struggling to read? 

23:08 Additional early signs of dyslexia

26:00 What is the problem with “whole language” instruction? 

30:37 Tips and strategies for helping your beginning reader enjoy the process

34:15 More resources from Welsley Jongko on learning to read

Scripture for Reflection: Proverbs 3:13 (NIV)
“Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding.”

Questions for Discussion:

1. Did Welsley’s insights on the reading crisis in America resonate with your own experiences? Have you had or do you have a child who struggles with reading? 
2. Were there any strategies or suggestions for helping your child that stood out to you as particularly helpful?
3. Fostering a love of learning is crucial for young readers. Does reading aloud happen regularly in your home? What are some favorite books in your family? Have you ever tried listening to audiobooks together? Is this an area you can grow in as a family? 

Resources:

• Welsley’s book, Teach Me to Read: https://amzn.to/4d1lJAe
• Follow Little Literacy Nook! @littleliteracynook
• More resources on Welsley’s website: https://littleliteracynook.com
• Sold a Story podcast on flawed reading instruction: https://features.apmreports.org/sold-a-story/ 
• The reading crisis among elementary students in America: https://edtrust.org/blog/the-literacy-crisis-in-the-u-s-is-deeply-concerning-and-totally-preventable/#:~:text=Last%20year%2C%20the%20National%20Assessment,a%20proficient%20level%20in%20reading.
• Love Every Reading Skills Set: https://lovevery.com/pages/the-reading-skill-set
• Come hear Karen teach at an event near you: https://birdsonawiremoms.com/events
• Join our private BOAW Moms FB group for community and collective wisdom: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms