2013, the year Damon started SNCTM, was a decade ago – gag. And, at the time, this high-end sex club was new, exciting, and transgressive. Now, looking back, we examine the complicated legacy of SNCTM – from pleasure paradise to messy free-for-all – and the lasting impact it had on the people who worked and played there. After all that went down, where are Damon and Melissa today? 

And we ask the question: is sexual freedom like… even possible? Plus: Karley goes to SNCTM – yay!

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After years at the helm of SNCTM, Damon faces a daunting question: where is the line between sexual experimentation and sexual compulsion? Disillusioned with the sex club and this world he’s built, Damon comes to the conclusion that what feels good, may not actually be good for him. And as he forces himself to confront his addictions, he realizes he needs to untangle his own identity from that of SNCTM’s… in order to set himself on a better path.

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Sex work was happening at SNCTM in various forms. The monthly party became known for its elaborate live sex shows, but there were other, more gray areas of exchange of sex for money happening, too. And as side hustles and “arrangements” became more popular, Damon found himself walking a fine line of morality, legality, and negotiating consent in an environment of wealth, excess and entitlement. 

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In this episode, we take a look back at Damon’s life before SNCTM — a story that is both spectacular and harrowing. Damon and his younger sister Hadria reflect on growing up in the Bay Area in the 1970s, in an environment laced with alcohol, drugs, neglect and abuse. These early experiences establish a sharp contrast between success and scarcity in Damon’s life as he dabbles in modeling, real estate, and starting a family – before finally losing everything and fleeing to Bali. And somehow, all of this leads him to launching “the most elite sex club in the world.” 

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Damon’s personal life is up in flames, but the club’s success is skyrocketing. Due to SNCTM’s wild popularity, Damon creates a more elite tier of Sanctum membership – called “Dominus” – which costs tens of thousands of dollars and involves a blood oath initiation ceremony. This brings a new level of wealth and status to the club – at least among the men. For women, their looks were their currency. And, as Damon finds out, money doesn’t mean happiness.

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Damon moves into a Tudor mansion in Holmby Hills—quickly dubbed The Sanctum Mansion—where he both lives and hosts the parties. Damon declares his newly discovered non-monogamous status to Melissa, which ultimately leads to their breakup. But what ended their relationship actually made others stronger. We explore how sex clubs like SNCTM can provide a release valve for the pressures of monogamous relationships – even with the jealousy and anxiety (and a skyrocketing lube budget). But in the search for sexual enlightenment, Damon’s reality doesn’t reflect what he had imagined.

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Damon starts hosting his raucous sex parties monthly, at various secret locations around LA. Two longtime SNCTM performers recall their early days at the club – including Damon’s unconventional hiring practices. As his luxury sex empire grows over SNCTM’s first two years, Damon becomes increasingly tempted by the world that he’s created – and it starts to get messy. 

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Our story begins in 2013, with Damon Lawner penniless, jobless, and contemplating suicide. But then, one night, he watches Stanley Kubrick's film Eyes Wide Shut — ya know, with that iconic illuminati sex party scene — and he gets a spark of inspiration. He decides that his new mission in life is to launch a sex club for wealthy Hollywood elites interested in ritualistic sex. Obviously. But he has no idea what’s in store for him.

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In 2013, Damon Lawner went from being a broke family man to a sex club kingpin when he founded SNCTM: the most elite sex club in the world. Damon created a place where billionaires and Hollywood celebs could explore their wildest sexual fantasies – but it ultimately turned his life upside down. Join host Karley Sciortino as she explores our most hidden desires – and uncovers the story of SNCTM.

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