Are you always the one taking care of and fixing problems for everyone else?

Today, I'm taking a deep dive into the heart of overfunctioning—exploring why so many of us feel compelled to take on excessive responsibilities, often at the cost of our own well-being. I delve into parentification, which I believe often lies at the root of overfunctioning. I also share how understanding these dynamics through Mel Robbins' "Let Them Theory" can offer powerful insights for change.

Whether you're tired of always being 'the responsible one' or you're seeking to understand your deep-seated need to please others, this discussion will clarify the roots of these behaviors and guide you toward a path of healing and freedom.

Here’s what we cover:

*What is overfunctioning, and how does it impact your life?

*How childhood parentification fuels overfunctioning in adulthood

*5 clear signs you were parentified as a child

*3 practical steps to start healing

*How Mel Robbins’ Let Them Theory transforms boundary setting

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love: Episode 5: What is Codependency and Why Does it Matter?

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.
• Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order!
• Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What’s the secret to healing marriage struggles and fostering deep connection?

In this heartfelt and incredibly vulnerable conversation, Ron and Nan Deal share their journey of rebuilding a marriage that almost unraveled. Drawing from their new book, The Mindful Marriage, they reveal how understanding and managing your own pain cycles can transform relationships. Whether you’re married, single, or navigating any relationship, this episode offers profound wisdom and practical tools for emotional and personal growth.

Episode Highlights:

* Explore one couple's journey through shame, blame, and rediscovering connection.

* Learn 4 Pain Cycles that disrupt relationships and how to break free from them.

* Uncover practical steps to nurture your relationship’s “us-ness” without losing yourself.

* Learn what to do when you're willing to do the work—but your partner isn't.

Get your copy of The Mindful Marriage here.

Take the free assessment Ron and Nan mention in the episode here.

For more insights and tools for emotional and relational health, subscribe to Dr. Alison’s weekly email newsletter here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 115: 4 Ways to Transform Your Relationship: Expert Tips to Heal Pain Points and Deepen Intimacy

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order!
• Get ahead of the New Year with a routine that helps you now by going to Seed.com/BESTOFYOU and use code 25BESTOFYOU to get 25% off your first month.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you experience loving attachment when trauma leaves you feeling shattered?

In this incredibly profound and insightful episode, therapist and author of the brand new book, Sacred Attachment, Michael Cusick joins us to explore how our darkest moments of brokenness are not just moments of pain, but pivotal opportunities for forming a deeper, more secure attachment with God. Michael shares about his own healing journey as a result of complex trauma, and we unpack how our pain can bring us even closer to encounters with God’s love. Today’s episode is for everyone who has ever felt broken. We discuss. . .

*5 way of understanding brokenness (and why the "sin" paradigm falls short)

*Why mystical encounters are for all of us

*A jaw-dropping moment when Michael experienced God's love

*The role of imagination in healing

*How to restore exiled and wounded parts of us

Order Sacred Attachment

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 16: What are Attachment Styles and Why Does it Matter?

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.
• Go to Quince.com/bestofyou for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order!

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feeling exhaustion or post-holiday blues? How can we step into the New Year feeling refreshed and empowered?

‍

In this honest and vulnerable conversation, spiritual director and author Anjuli Paschall and I unpack our own journeys through holiday people-pleasing and how to reset for the New Year. As we close out the year, many of us grapple with a mix of relief and disappointment, compounded by the pressure of New Year's resolutions and the desire to start fresh. Anjuli offers her expert guidance on understanding these dynamics and introduces practical steps and spiritual practices to help us move forward with hope and clarity.

‍

Here’s what we cover:‍

* How to break free from holiday people-pleasing

* The #1 way to stop trying to control other people’s feelings

* Why post-holiday let down happens & what to do

* How to develop and cultivate aspirational feelings in your body

* Why the hope of a new year sometimes hurts & how to navigate those feelings

* Prayers to move through complicated emotions

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 30: Protecting What’s Good Without Denying What’s Hard at the Holidays

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift!
• Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you curious about how science and spirituality intersect in understanding and treating mental health conditions like OCD?

This week, therapist and spiritual director Ryan Kuja shares his incredible journey through the complex world of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). From a young age, Ryan battled intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors. Feeling isolated and overwhelmed, at 17, he cried out to God—a pivotal moment that launched him into an unexpected exploration of mysticism, neurobiology, and the intricacies of diagnosis. This episode is designed for everyone, whether you or someone you love is dealing with OCD, or you're simply interested in gaining a deeper understanding of the diverse human experience.

Here’s what we cover:

* Ryan recounts the pivotal moment at 17 when his struggle with OCD drove him to seek divine intervention

* The difference between OCD and common intrusive thoughts—what sets them apart?

* An overview of the latest and most effective treatments for OCD, from clinical approaches to innovative therapies

* Ryan shares the spiritual practices that have not only helped manage his OCD but also enriched his spiritual journey

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 129: Understanding Your Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm, Advocating For Yourself, and Cultivating Inner Resilience
• Episode 51: The 12 Common Thinking Traps, Mind Reading, Mental Filters, and How To Stop Taking Things Personally

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Turn back time on the appearance of your skin with Purity Woods’s Age-Defying Dream Cream. Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order.
• Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you move from feeling stuck to finding meaning and healing in your grief?

In today’s episode, I’m honored to speak with David Kessler, one of the world’s foremost experts on grief and the author who expanded Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s original five stages of grief by adding a sixth stage: meaning. We explore how common reactions like avoidance, blame, and bargaining are a normal part of the grieving process, and how finding meaning can be a transformative step toward healing. Whether you’re grieving a loss or supporting someone who is, this conversation will help you better understand the continuum of grief and the power of creating meaning.

Here's what we cover:

* The 5 stages of grief and how different parts of us experience loss

* David’s 6th stage of grief and how it developed out of his own story

* The most important question to ask someone who is grieving

* David’s 7 guidelines for creating meaning after loss

* Why grief is intimately linked to joy

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier!
• Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you feel like you’re constantly caring for others, whether it’s aging parents, your kids, or even your career—and there’s little time left for you?

Women in the sandwich generation, particularly those aged 35-54, report higher stress levels than any other age group. If you’re juggling a heavy load of responsibilities as you care for others, you’re not alone. In this episode, you’ll gain practical tools to help you navigate this season with compassion and healthy boundaries, empowering you with the support and nourishment you need.

Here's what we cover:

* Why caring for others can stir up unresolved emotions and how to address them

* 3 key strategies to help you through stressful seasons

* The antidote for constant guilt

* How to set boundaries that protect your emotional well-being

* Practical ways to invite God into your daily routine

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

Episode 6: Do I Really Have an Inner Child? What It Means to Reparent Yourself

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/bestofyou!
• Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order.
• Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do the holidays bring a mix of joy and complicated emotions for you?

We're supposed to feel grateful, and parts of us do. But other parts of us feel nostalgic, driven by guilt, exhausted, or even angry. In this honest, vulnerable conversation, author and spiritual director Anjuli Paschall joins me to explore the emotions that surface during the holiday season. We talk about how to navigate these feelings with grace, and how these emotions can be gifts in disguise. We cover. . .

* How to distinguish between true guilt and false guilt

* The surprising connection between anger and exhaustion

* Why nostalgia can be both comforting and bittersweet

* Practical ways to honor all your feelings during this emotionally complex season

* Anjuli’s practice of praying through complicated emotions and finding God’s presence in them

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

Episode 30: Protecting What’s Good Without Denying What’s Hard at the Holidays

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift!
• Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever wondered if someone you know might be on the autism spectrum—or even questioned it about yourself?

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is often misunderstood, misdiagnosed, or even missed entirely, especially in those who don’t fit common stereotypes. In this episode, neuropsychologist Dr. Donna Henderson joins us to unpack the complexities of autism, neurodiversity, and how we can better understand and support those around us.

What You’ll Learn:

* The 7 key criteria for identifying autism

* When to pursue a neuropsychological evaluation

* Why talk therapy often falls short for neurodivergent individuals

* How someone can exhibit an "autistic nervous system" without having ASD

* Practical ways to support loved ones

This conversation will deepen your understanding of neurodiversity and help you see the world - and those you love - in a new light.

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 129: Understanding Your Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm, Advocating For Yourself, and Cultivating Inner Resilience
• Episode 85: The Goal of a Healthy Family & 6 Roles We Take On In Dysfunction

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.
• Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift!
• Get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever feel stuck in anxious thoughts?

Are you longing for more moments of calm throughout your day?

Every single one of us has a relationship with anxiety. The goal isn't to eradicate anxiety; it’s to work with anxiety to create more peace and balance in our lives. In this episode, I guide you through a clear, step-by-step understanding of your relationship with anxiety. Whether you’re navigating your own anxious moments or supporting loved ones, you'll learn how to identify root causes and key insights needed to find calm and clarity.

Here’s what we’ll cover:

* How to understand your unique experience with anxiety

* Key root causes of anxiety, including genetics, personality, and environment

* The impact of High Sensitivity (HSP) and neurodivergence on anxiety

* 3 practical techniques to calm anxiety and cultivate strong internal leadership

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 54: Can I Pray My Anxiety Away? A Surprising Approach to the Anxiety Pandemic & How to Walk Yourself & Your Kids Through It with Curtis Chang
• Episode 109: Healing Burdens From the Past—How to Overcome Childhood Wounds and Heal Your Younger Self with Tammy Sollenberger
• Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier!
• Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift!
• Go to puritywoods.com/BESTOFYOU or enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout for an additional 10% off your first order.
• Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you carrying burdens that aren't entirely your own? Could understanding your family's past be the key to unlocking a healthier future?

In this powerful episode, we dive into the concept of generational trauma with my guest, Gina Birkemeier, therapist and author of the book & workbook, “Generations Deep”. Gina shares her personal and professional insights on how deep-seated family issues can affect us and how both faith and therapy play pivotal roles in healing and breaking these cycles.

You'll learn. . .

* What generational trauma is and how it subtly influences our lives

* Why Gina realized that she needed therapy and Jesus

* What epigenetics is and how our genes remember & sometimes inherit the trauma of previous generations

* How to understand cycle breaking & to end the cycle of dysfunction

* About the legacy burdens we carry from our family's past.

Have a question for Dr. Alison? Leave it here.

Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

If you enjoyed this episode, you'll love:

• Episode 127: Healing Childhood Wounds—The Enmeshed Family & 5 Toxic Patterns that Affect Your Ability to Thrive in Adult Relationships
• Episode 101: I Shouldn’t Feel Angry—Exploring the Violence that Shapes Our Family Stories & How to Heal with Lisa Jo Baker

Thanks to our sponsors:

• Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today.
• Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout.
• Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription - but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/BESTOFYOU.
• This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.
• Fatty15 is on a mission to replenish your C15 levels and restore your long-term health. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/BESTOFYOU and using code BESTOFYOU at checkout.

Music by Andy Luiten

Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices