Friendship Therapy

Emma Reed Turrell

Hello! We’re Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed-Turrell. And for over 20 years, we’ve been best friends. Elizabeth is a broadcaster and author. Emma is a psychotherapist. Best Friend Therapy is where we chat about what’s on our minds to get deeper in our...

  • 40 minutes 38 seconds
    S3, Ep 9 Friendship Therapy: Surface Dwellers and Depth Seekers - exploring emotional depth in male friendships
    Welcome to this week's episode of Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which we look at friendships through a therapeutic lens.

    This week, Emma is joined by Elliot to talk about what it's like to be an, as he puts it, emotional male within male friendship groups. Elliot shares an experience that many of us might be able to relate to: being unceremoniously exited from a friendship group chat, with no real explanation or conversation beforehand. 

    In this episode, Emma and Elliot talk about why being a lone voice in the wilderness might feel lonely, but might also be necessary when it comes to blazing a trail towards greater emotional intimacy and permission to be authentic among a group of individuals who haven't necessarily been encouraged to be vulnerable.

    Emma and Elliot also chat about the difference between friends who are surface dwellers and the ones who are depth seekers, and how to avoid emotional bends when we're traveling between different water pressures. In fact, this episode makes a lot of references to the ocean, from Finding Nemo to treasure chests - so we encourage you to settle back on your Lilo and enjoy the conversation.

    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

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    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    16 December 2024, 1:00 am
  • 7 minutes 43 seconds
    S3, Ep 8 Dial Emma: Platonic Crushes - how emotional self-sufficiency supports healthier connections
    Welcome back to this week's episode of Dial Emma! This is where you get to dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what we did there?!) You share your dilemma, any dilemma, and Emma shares her reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to navigate it.

    This week, our Dial Emma voicenote comes from a listener who is navigating the feeling of having a platonic crush, or 'squish', on someone who they really want to experience friendship with. 

    In this episode, Emma digs deeper into how platonic crushes often stem from a deep desire for emotional connection and validation, and explores why cultivating emotional self sufficiency and self acceptance can help us to maintain healthier friendships with others. Emma also encourages our listener to acknowledge that not every friend will be able to provide the emotional closeness that we're looking for, but they are still a friend - and these friendships can exist harmoniously together.

    If you have a dilemma for Emma, drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

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    Social media:  

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell

    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod

    Email: [email protected]
    13 December 2024, 1:00 am
  • 38 minutes 22 seconds
    S3, Ep 7 Friendship Therapy: Feeling like an Outsider - seeking self awareness, connection and intimacy in friendship
    Welcome to this week's episode of Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which we look at friendships through a therapeutic lens.

    This week, Emma is joined by Sarah, who has been navigating feelings of loneliness and being an outsider in her friendship groups.

    In this conversation, Emma and Sarah explore what it means to fit in, what it's like when you don't get joy from the same things that your friends find enjoyable, or at least seem to, and whether what we're all really seeking is a U-shaped space that is made to measure and entirely ours to fill. 

    Emma and Sarah also talk about why learning about what we actually like can bring us a sense of relief, but it can also bring grief too.


    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    9 December 2024, 1:00 am
  • 15 minutes 50 seconds
    S3, Ep 6 Dial Emma: Fertility and Friendship - navigating grief and joy
    TW: Miscarriage

    Welcome back to this week's episode of Dial Emma! This is where you get to dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what we did there?!) You share your dilemma, any dilemma, and Emma shares her reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to navigate it.

    This week, we hear from a listener who is dealing with complex emotions surrounding grief, in the context of recurrent miscarriage and its impact on friendships.

    In this episode, Emma explores the feelings of isolation, sadness and jealousy that might come up alongside the joy we feel for friends who are experiencing parenthood, encouraging our listener to set boundaries, communicate needs and seek support from friends and professionals. She also highlights the importance of self-compassion and allowing our friendships to deepen and evolve through shared experiences.

    If you have a dilemma for Emma, drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media:  

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell

    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod

    Email: [email protected]
    6 December 2024, 1:00 am
  • 43 minutes 52 seconds
    S3, Ep 5 Friendship Therapy: Ambivalence in Friendship - what happens when your friend becomes your boss?
    Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which psychotherapist and author Emma Reed Turrell talks to real people about real friendships and looks at these pivotal relationships through a therapeutic lens.

    This week, Emma meets Kelly, a smart, self-aware woman who's nearly 50, yet who finds herself stuck with some big feelings about a friendship that ended 18 months ago, when her friend of 17 years became her boss and the friendship fell apart. 

    In this episode, Emma introduces Kelly to the 'ambivalence seesaw', a tool we can use whenever we're feeling stuck to help us make a decision or find closure. Kelly comes to understand how her experiences growing up might have stacked the cards against her when it comes to certain friendships, and how her ability to manage upwards might make her the perfect deputy or number one number two - but it might not leave much room for her to succeed.

    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    2 December 2024, 1:00 am
  • 14 minutes 10 seconds
    S3, Ep 4 Dial Emma: Notes on Parenting - lending our nervous system to our children
    Welcome back to this week's episode of Dial Emma! This is where you get to dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what we did there?!) You share your dilemma, any dilemma, and Emma shares her reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to navigate it.

    This week, we're bringing you something a little different. We hear from a long-time friend and listener of the show, who shares her reflections on a previous episode of Friendship Therapy in which Emma and her 10-year-old daughter Elsa talked about childhood friendships.

    Emma follows up on some of the thoughts and feelings that she and Elsa explored in the episode, from understanding our children's unique lived experience and how it differs from our own, to building emotional resilience and regulation with our children.

    If you have a dilemma for Emma, drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media:  

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell

    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod

    Email: [email protected]
    29 November 2024, 1:00 am
  • 8 minutes 14 seconds
    S3, Ep 2 Dial Emma: Grieving a Pet - what our animals can teach us about ourselves
    Welcome back to Dial Emma from Friendship Therapy! This is where you get to dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what we did there?!) You share your dilemma, any dilemma, and Emma shares her reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to navigate it.

    This week, Emma hears from a listener who is navigating the loss of a beloved companion and friend: her cat, Minnie. In her voicenote, this caller describes how she has struggled to do life without Minnie and is now considering getting a new cat, but continues to grapple with feelings of guilt at the prospect of moving on while still grieving for her furry friend.

    In this episode, Emma explores the unique experience of loving and grieving a pet, and shares how the long-lasting, consistent bonds that we build with our animals allow us to access and nurture the parts of ourselves that we often ignore.
      
    What advice would you give this listener?

    If you have a dilemma for Emma, drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media:  

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell

    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod

    Email: [email protected]
    22 November 2024, 1:00 am
  • 46 minutes 49 seconds
    S3, Ep 1 Friendship Therapy: Reciprocity in Friendship - how fear can get in the way of vulnerability
    Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which we look at friendships through a therapeutic lens. To kick off season three, Emma chats to Poppy, who is struggling with a friendship dilemma that many of us can relate to.

    We've all been on the receiving end of a friend who has ditched us temporarily for a new relationship; perhaps we've been that friend who has, for a period of time, chosen to spend more time with a new partner than with our friendship group. But what happens when history seems to repeat itself over and over again?

    This week, Emma and Poppy talk about a particular friend who continuously chooses to drop her when the offer of a new relationship is on the horizon, and how that feels for Poppy. Using a Gestalt therapy technique, Emma takes Poppy through a therapy exercise live on the podcast to help her make sense of how a conversation with her friend might play out, and what the resolution might look like.

    Together, Emma and Poppy discover what Poppy's motivations in this friendship are, and why it might be more about feelings of fear, than feelings of frustration between the two of them.

    Find out more about Gestalt Therapy techniques: https://www.mentalhealth.com/library/gestalt-therapy-the-empty-chair-technique#:~:text=The%20Empty%20Chair%20Technique%20is,internal%20conflicts%20or%20unfinished%20business.

    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    18 November 2024, 1:00 am
  • 41 minutes 49 seconds
    S3, Ep 1 BONUS: Tolerance in Friendship with Michelle Elman
    Hello, and welcome to season three of Friendship Therapy! This is the podcast in which author and podcaster Emma Reed Turrell talks to real people about real friendships and looks at these pivotal relationships through a therapeutic lens.

    This week, a special bonus episode to kick off a new season: Emma chats to Michelle Elman, bestselling author, speaker and life coach whose fifth book, Bad Friend: Why Friendship Breakups Hurt and How to Heal, is due to be published in May 2025.

    Michelle joins Emma to talk about tolerance in friendship and explore why we can find it challenging to tolerate the decisions our friends make. When is it time to bite your tongue in friendship, and when does our silence make us complicit? Are we trying to save our friend, or is it really about saving a younger part of ourselves?

    Pre-order Michelle's book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Bad-Friend-Friendship-Breakups-Hurt/dp/1408749459/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season 4, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

    Voicenote Emma with your dilemma in the @friendshiptherapypod DMs.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    11 November 2024, 1:00 am
  • 13 minutes 49 seconds
    S2, Ep 12 Dial Emma: Friendship Accountability - is it me, or is it them?
    Welcome back to Dial Emma from Friendship Therapy, and the season 2 finale! This is where you get to dial Emma, with your dilemma (see what I did there?!) You share your friendship concerns, and I share my reflections as a therapist to give you the tips and tools you need to build better bonds.

    This week, our Dial Emma caller wants to talk about accountability in friendship. Should we adjust our expectations when friends let us down, or should we hold them to higher standards? Why is there often less accountability in friendship compared to romantic relationships?

    In this episode, and in the absence of a friendship HR department, jury or ombudsman, Emma encourages this listener to ask a simple question that might open up a much more honest conversation: is it me that’s not okay, or is it this situation that is not okay?

    Emma also explores why accountability and deep connection are not always a given in friendship, and why we need to get curious about what we are willing to offer as a friend and, crucially, what we need from friendship.
      
    What advice would you give this listener?

    We'll be back with season 3 very soon, so please keep sending in your dilemmas for Emma to respond to! Drop us a voicenote on Instagram @friendshiptherapypod.

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media:  

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell

    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod

    Email: [email protected]
    4 October 2024, 12:00 am
  • 47 minutes 39 seconds
    S2, Ep 11 Friendship Therapy: Childhood Friendships - friendship from the perspective of a 10-year-old
    Welcome back to Friendship Therapy, the podcast in which we look at friendships through a therapeutic lens.

    So many of our wonderful guests talk about childhood friendships and how those early experiences shape the friendships that we'll make as adults - so who better to help us talk about the way those friendships form than someone who's in the middle of making them right now?

    This week, Emma chats to Elsa. She's 10 years old. She's an expert on childhood friendship. And she also happens to be Emma's daughter.

    Emma and Elsa talk about what makes a good friend, those times when 'magpying' is actually copying, how to deal with it when a friend hurts our feelings, and Emma's personal friendship nemesis, the group of three.

    Please do bear with us if the sound quality is slightly affected this week. Many sweets were consumed in the making of this episode.

    If you’d like to apply to appear on the podcast in season 3, please click the link below to fill out the form: 
    https://forms.gle/9yZAVgF9BbyKhwsV7

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    Friendship Therapy is hosted by Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp and Lauren Brook.

    --- 

    Social media: 

    Emma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrell
    Friendship Therapy @friendshiptherapypod
    Email: [email protected]
    30 September 2024, 12:00 am
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