The Relaxed Male

Bryan Goodwin

Helping Men get out of their own way

  • 39 minutes 47 seconds
    4 Pillars to Transform and Reset Your Life in the New Year

    As the holiday season approaches, it's the perfect time to reflect on the past year and prepare for the new one. In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the importance of reviewing our lives and setting goals for 2025. Host Bryan Goodwin, a certified coach, guides us through the process of self-examination and goal setting, emphasizing the significance of the four pillars of a relaxed male: mind, body, soul, and community.

    Bryan shares his personal journey with Relaxed Male, discussing the challenges and successes he's faced over the past seven years. He highlights the importance of setting realistic goals and celebrating achievements, no matter how small. By conducting an after-action review, we can learn from our successes and failures, paving the way for personal growth.

    The episode also explores the significance of having a strong community and the role it plays in personal development. Brian encourages listeners to focus on building relationships and expanding their network, as these connections can greatly influence our success and happiness.

    Looking ahead to 2025, Brian shares his goals, including losing 50 pounds, attending a conference, and making new contacts. He emphasizes the importance of having a clear vision and the determination to achieve it, while also being prepared for challenges along the way.

    Join Bryan as he offers insights and practical advice on how to make the upcoming year a successful and fulfilling one, by focusing on personal growth and building a supportive community.
    https://www.relaxedmale.com/trycoaching

    19 December 2024, 9:00 am
  • 25 minutes 28 seconds
    Taking your wife off the pedestal allows her to love you more.

    The podcast focuses on the concept of taking one's wife off a metaphorical pedestal in a relationship. The host, Bryan, discusses how men often idealize their wives, creating an unrealistic and ultimately harmful dynamic in their marriages.

    Bryan explains that when men place their wives on a pedestal, they create an impossible standard of perfection. This idealization actually prevents genuine connection and love. By elevating their wives to an unreachable status, men inadvertently create distance and pressure that makes it difficult for their wives to be themselves.

    The host, identifying as a recovering "nice guy," shares insights into how this pedestal mentality stems from feelings of unworthiness. Men often believe they don't deserve their wife's love, so they compensate by worshipping her. However, this approach backfires. It makes the wife uncomfortable and creates an unsustainable relationship dynamic where she feels constant pressure to maintain an impossible image.

    Bryan emphasizes that wives are human beings with complex emotions and changing states. They go through various phases - sometimes feeling sexy and energetic, other times tired and overwhelmed, especially during different life stages like parenthood. When men expect their wives to maintain a constant, idealized state, they set themselves up for disappointment and resentment.

    The key to a healthy relationship, according to Bryan, is accepting your wife's full humanity. This means allowing her to experience and express her emotions without trying to fix or judge them. It means being comfortable with her changing appearance, mood, and priorities. By removing her from the pedestal and treating her as an equal partner, men actually create space for deeper love and connection.

    Bryan also addresses the challenge this presents for men, who are naturally inclined to solve problems and take action. He advises listeners to resist the urge to immediately fix their wife's emotions and instead simply be present and accepting.

    Towards the end of the podcast, Bryan promotes an upcoming workshop called "Storm Master" aimed at helping men improve their relationships by understanding and managing their internal emotional landscape. He encourages listeners to share the podcast with others who might benefit from its insights about relationship dynamics and personal growth.

    The overall message is profound in its simplicity: true love means accepting your partner completely, without conditions or unrealistic expectations, and allowing them the freedom to be fully human.

    12 December 2024, 9:00 am
  • 1 hour 1 minute
    Healing Relationships and Redefining Masculinity with Dawn Wiggins

    This week on The Relaxed Male, we have a special guest, Dawn Wiggins, host of the podcast Dear Divorce Diaries. We dive deep into the world of marriage counseling and explore what couples can expect from therapy. Dawn shares insights on how to navigate the painful journey of divorce and offers strategies to prevent it by fostering healthier relationships.

    We discuss the concept of conflict avoidance, a common issue many men face, and how it impacts relationships. Dawn explains the importance of emotional processing and the dangers of becoming "comfortably numb" through distractions like work, screens, and substances. We explore how men can step into conflict constructively and create relationships worth fighting for.

    Dawn shares her experiences with homeopathy and its impact on emotional well-being, offering a fresh perspective on alternative medicine. We also touch on the importance of grounding oneself in a belief system and how it can provide stability during conflicts.

    Throughout the episode, we emphasize the significance of self-acceptance and understanding repetitive patterns in relationships. Dawn provides practical advice for men to improve their connections with their partners by observing and addressing deeper issues.

    Join us for an enlightening conversation that challenges traditional views on masculinity and offers actionable steps for personal growth and relationship improvement.

    Information on Our Guest

    Dawn Wiggins Therapy
    She specializes in EMDR, Tapping, Marriage therapy, and psychotherapy. With her offices based in Florida, she does in-person and online sessions.
    Dawn also is a divorce coach helping women learn to process their thoughts and emotions so that they are able to grow from their experience.
    Divorce Coaching - https://mycoachdawn.com/
    Dawn's Therapy Website - https://www.dawnwigginstherapy.com/
    Podcast: Dear Divorce Diary- https://mycoachdawn.com/divorce-podcast/

    Dawns Social Media
    Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/MyCoachDawn
    X - https://x.com/dawn_wiggins
    Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dawnwiggins/
    Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@DawnWigginsLMFTBocaRaton
    Threads - https://www.threads.net/@dawnwiggins

    28 November 2024, 9:00 am
  • 39 minutes 53 seconds
    What in the World is Physical Intimacy?

    In this final episode of our series on intimacy, we delve into the realm of physical intimacy. Over the past ten weeks, we've explored various forms of intimacy, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, creative, conflict, aesthetic, and work. Today, we focus on the nuances of physical intimacy, a topic that often garners significant attention and curiosity.

    Physical intimacy is more than just the act of sex; it encompasses a range of interactions, from holding hands to sharing a hug. These gestures release chemicals like oxytocin, fostering a sense of connection and bonding. We discuss how societal norms can sometimes hinder men from expressing their emotions, which are crucial for building emotional intimacy with their partners.

    We also touch on the importance of conflict intimacy, which allows couples to engage in healthy disagreements and grow stronger together. This episode emphasizes that physical intimacy is deeply intertwined with other forms of intimacy, and improving these areas can enhance one's overall relationship.

    For those seeking to deepen their understanding and practice of intimacy, I offer insights into how to work on emotional, intellectual, and spiritual connections. By focusing on these areas, physical intimacy will naturally follow, leading to a more fulfilling and balanced relationship.

    Join me as we wrap up this enlightening series and prepare for next week's episode featuring a special guest, Don Wiggins.

    21 November 2024, 9:00 am
  • 20 minutes 9 seconds
    What in the World is Work Intimacy?

    What is Work initiative?


    In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of work intimacy, a lesser-known but vital form of intimacy that influences our relationships both at home and in the workplace. Host Brian Goodwin explores how work intimacy fits into the broader spectrum of intimacy types, including emotional, intellectual, and experiential intimacy. He discusses the importance of effective communication and collaboration with our partners and colleagues, emphasizing how these interactions can strengthen our bonds and lead to personal growth.

    Brian shares personal anecdotes about the challenges and rewards of working closely with a spouse, highlighting the need for presence and understanding in shared projects. He explains how work intimacy is not just about professional relationships but also about how we share our work experiences and problem-solving processes with our partners. This episode encourages listeners to embrace discomfort as a path to achieving deeper connections and a more fulfilling life.

    Listeners are invited to reflect on their own work intimacy and consider how it impacts their overall relationship health. Brian also offers a preview of next week's episode, which will focus on physical intimacy, and extends an invitation to try a free coaching session to explore personal challenges further.

    Links
    Mini Coaching Session - https://www.relaxedmale.com/trycoaching
    Podcast 2.0 app - https://www.relaxedmale.com/newapps

    14 November 2024, 9:00 am
  • 30 minutes 45 seconds
    What in The World is Aesthetic Intimacy?

    In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of aesthetic intimacy, exploring how aesthetics and intimacy intertwine in our lives. As part of a series on different types of intimacy, We discuss the importance of sharing beautiful experiences with loved ones, particularly spouses, to strengthen relationships. Aesthetic intimacy is about appreciating the beauty around us, whether it's a sunset, a piece of art, or a simple walk with a partner, and how these shared moments can enhance our connections.

    Bryan shares personal anecdotes, such as visiting Sunset Cliffs with his family and dog, to illustrate how aesthetic experiences can bond people together. He emphasizes the significance of being intentional in recognizing beauty in everyday life and how this can prevent relationships from becoming mundane.

    The episode also touches on the broader spectrum of intimacy, including physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual, and how aesthetic intimacy fits into this framework. Bryan argues that aesthetic intimacy is a subset of experiential intimacy, highlighting the need for both beauty and ugliness to appreciate life fully.

    Listeners are encouraged to engage in aesthetic experiences with their partners, to "stop and smell the roses," and to embrace both the beautiful and challenging aspects of life. Bryan also introduces a 4-week challenge starting January 1st, aimed at helping men calm their inner disturbances and improve their relationships.

    7 November 2024, 9:00 am
  • 37 minutes 19 seconds
    What In The World Is Conflict Intimacy?

    In this week's episode, we delve into the concept of conflict intimacy, a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of relationships. Drawing inspiration from an article on Choose Therapy, we explore the ten different types of intimacy, focusing particularly on conflict intimacy and its significance in maintaining a healthy relationship.

    Conflict intimacy, as discussed, is the ability to engage in and resolve conflicts constructively. It is essential for preventing relationships from becoming stagnant and for avoiding the "roommate syndrome." We revisit the various types of intimacy, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, and creative, and discuss how conflict intimacy intertwines with these aspects.

    We explore why many people, especially men, avoid conflict due to fears of emotional upheaval and potential negative outcomes, such as impacting sexual relationships. However, embracing conflict can lead to deeper understanding and connection, as it involves sharing emotions, thoughts, and experiences.

    Drawing insights from experts like Dr. John Gottman and Jason Gaddis, we highlight the importance of conflict in fostering a thriving relationship. We discuss how discomfort is a necessary currency for achieving desired outcomes and how conflict can lead to personal growth and stronger bonds.

    Listeners are encouraged to embrace conflict as a means of enhancing intimacy and communication with their partners. By understanding and practicing effective conflict resolution, couples can transform their relationships, creating a more fulfilling and connected partnership.

    31 October 2024, 8:00 am
  • 28 minutes 48 seconds
    What In The World is Creative Intimacy?

    We are exploring the world of Creative Intimacy today

    In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of creative intimacy, one of the ten types of intimacy outlined by Choose Therapy. As we explore whether creative intimacy is a legitimate form of intimacy, I share my personal insights and invite listeners to form their own opinions.

    Creative intimacy involves the ability to collaborate with your partner on creative projects, such as making music, writing, or crafting. It requires a shared vision and the willingness to navigate differences in approach and opinion. This process can strengthen your relationship by fostering communication and compromise.

    Throughout the episode, I discuss the various types of intimacy, including physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, conflict, aesthetic, and work intimacy. Each type offers a unique way to connect with your partner, and creative intimacy is no exception.

    While some may argue that creative intimacy is simply an extension of experiential intimacy, I believe it offers its own distinct challenges and rewards. By engaging in creative projects, couples can learn more about themselves and each other, ultimately enhancing their bond.

    Join me as we unpack the nuances of creative intimacy and consider its role in building stronger relationships. Whether you're sculpting a clay bust or writing a book together, the creative process can be a powerful tool for connection.

    24 October 2024, 8:00 am
  • 31 minutes 32 seconds
    What in the world is Social Intimacy?

    Host BrYan Goodwin, a certified coach, explores the ten different types of intimacy, focusing this week on social intimacy. He explains how social intimacy is essentially the connections we form with others, whether they are long-term relationships or brief interactions with acquaintances like a barista. Brian emphasizes the importance of maintaining these connections as we age, noting that societal changes and personal anxieties often hinder our ability to nurture friendships.

    BrYan discusses the challenges men face in forming and maintaining friendships, highlighting the societal pressures and personal fears that often lead to loneliness. He stresses the importance of having a strong community pillar, referencing Jim Rohn's idea that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. By intentionally building a network of supportive friends, men can improve their mental, physical, and spiritual well-being.

    The episode also touches on the significance of social intimacy within marriages. BrYan explains how couples often neglect this aspect of their relationship, leading to a lack of connection and intimacy over time. He offers practical advice on how to rekindle social intimacy with a partner, emphasizing the importance of communication and understanding.

    Throughout the episode, BrYan encourages listeners to step out of their comfort zones and actively work on building and maintaining friendships. He provides actionable steps for improving social intimacy, both in friendships and romantic relationships, and offers coaching support for those seeking to enhance their personal connections.

    Links
    New Podcast 2.0 Apps - https://www.newpodcastapps.com
    Coaching - https://wwww.relaxedmale.com/lovebirds

    17 October 2024, 8:00 am
  • 21 minutes 26 seconds
    What in the world is Experiential Intimacy?

    In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of experiential intimacy, a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of relationships. Experiential intimacy involves sharing and bonding over life experiences with your partner, which can significantly strengthen your relationship. We explore why these shared experiences are vital and how they act as the cement that holds relationships together.

    Drawing inspiration from a Choose Therapy post on the ten types of intimacy, we focus on experiential intimacy and its importance in creating lasting bonds. We discuss how shared experiences, whether mundane or exciting, can enhance your connection with your spouse. From visiting museums to going on adventures, these activities can help maintain the bond that might weaken over time if not nurtured.

    We also provide practical tips on how to cultivate experiential intimacy. Whether it's going on a new adventure, trying out a couple's retreat, or simply volunteering together, these activities can bring you closer to your partner. Even individual trips can contribute to this intimacy by providing new stories and experiences to share.

    Join us as we explore the significance of experiential intimacy and how it can transform your relationship, helping you live life intentionally with your partner. Tune in to learn more about how to strengthen your relationship through shared experiences.

    LINKS
    Questions that will Spark a conversation - https://www.relaxedmale.com/askquestions

    If you would like to reclaim your bride and leave the mediocrity of roommate syndrome behind, then it is time to take the next step.
    Take The Next Step

    - https://www.relaxedmale.com/lovebirds 
    10 October 2024, 8:00 am
  • 28 minutes 42 seconds
    What in the world is Spiritual Intimacy?

    In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of spiritual intimacy, continuing our exploration of the ten different types of intimacy as outlined by Choose Therapy. Having previously discussed emotional and intellectual intimacy, we now turn our attention to understanding each other's spiritual journeys. This episode challenges the notion of being spiritual without being religious and explores how spiritual beliefs can impact relationships.

    Host Bryan Goodwin shares his personal insights and struggles with the topic, emphasizing the importance of discussing spiritual beliefs with your partner. He highlights how spiritual intimacy can strengthen a relationship, even when partners have differing beliefs. Through personal anecdotes and thoughtful reflections, Brian encourages listeners to engage in open conversations about spirituality, respect differing beliefs, and find common ground.

    The episode also touches on the significance of traditions and rituals in fostering spiritual intimacy, offering practical advice on how to honor and serve each other in a spiritual sense. Bryan underscores the value of curiosity and understanding in building stronger connections, not just with partners, but with family and community as well.

    Listeners are invited to reflect on their own spiritual journeys and consider how they can enhance their spiritual intimacy with loved ones. Bryan offers coaching services for those seeking to improve their relationships and invites listeners to connect with him for further guidance.

    26 September 2024, 8:00 am
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