Pillow Talks

Vanessa & Xander Marin | QCODE

  • 1 hour 8 minutes
    Episode 193: The Things We Can’t Say In The Comments

    Ever wonder what we really want to say when someone leaves a spicy comment on one of our social media posts? Well, you’re in for a treat.


    Social media has been an incredible way to connect with our community, share free resources, and help couples build their best relationships. But putting ourselves out there also means we encounter some… interesting feedback.


    In this episode, we’re diving into the comment sections of our most viral posts. From debates about quickie intimacy to whether or not you should “fuck first,” we’re breaking down the conversations, sharing what we wish we could’ve said, and offering our advice to help you create a happier, healthier love life—trolls not included.


    Links & Resources:


    Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-193&utm_term=podcast-193


    Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-193&utm_term=podcast-193


    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-193&utm_term=podcast-193


    Connect with us! 👋

    Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander

    Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe


    Thanks Cozy Earth. Go to cozyearth.com/pillowtalks and use code PILLOWTALKS for an exclusive discount for up to 40% off.


    Thanks Hungryroot. That’s Hungryroot.com/pillow, to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life.


    Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow


    Thanks Cure. Stay hydrated and feel your best! Visit curehydration.com/PILLOW to get 20% off your first order.


    Thanks Goodwipes. Goodwipes will elevate your everyday hygiene with premium wipes that deliver a superior clean that no dry toilet paper can match. Goodwipes is naturally scented and hypoallergenic. Free from harsh chemicals, parabens, and dyes.

    30 January 2025, 12:00 pm
  • 51 minutes 26 seconds
    Episode 192: “Is This Normal?” Part 4 — Low Desire Husband, Never Had A Fight, & Baby Talk

    We’re diving into part 4 of one of our favorite series, “Is This Normal?”


    We’ll be exploring topics like: Is it normal for my husband to have absolutely no sex drive? Is it normal to never have fought? Is it normal for my partner to talk in a baby voice and for it to turn me off? And even more of your questions!


    This episode is packed with real talk, judgment-free advice, and practical tips to help you navigate these tricky (and sometimes awkward!) situations.


    Links & Resources:

    Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Treat Your Partner to the Best Foreplay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188


    Connect with us! 👋

    Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander

    Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe


    Thanks Cozy Earth. Go to cozyearth.com/pillowtalks and use code PILLOWTALKS for an exclusive discount for up to 40% off.

    Thanks Orgain. Head to Orgain.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 30% off your order.

    23 January 2025, 12:00 pm
  • 1 hour 7 minutes
    Episode 191: Breaking Free From Purity Culture And Religious Shame

    If you were raised in Purity Culture, you already know how challenging it can be to overcome now that you’re an adult. You spent years being taught that it’s important for you to be wholesome, that pleasure is sinful, and that there are very specific rules you need to follow.

    In this episode, we’re sharing stories from people who were raised in Purity Culture, and giving you step-by-step tips for overcoming shame.




    Links and Resources:


    Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191

    Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191

    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-191&utm_term=podcast-191



    Connect with us! 👋


    Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander


    Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe




    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!


    This episode is brought to you by…


    Thanks ZocDoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.


    Thanks Cozy Earth. Go to cozyearth.com/pillowtalks and use code PILLOWTALKS for an exclusive discount for up to 40% off.


    Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

    16 January 2025, 12:00 pm
  • 56 minutes 55 seconds
    Episode 190: Am I Being Reasonable Or Ridiculous?

    Have you ever wanted something from your partner, but found yourself wondering, “Am I asking too much?” Or has your partner ever asked you for something that didn’t feel reasonable to you?


    We asked our community to share some of their questionable relationship requests, and the responses were fascinating! Tune in as we break down the line between what’s reasonable, what’s ridiculous, and what’s simply part of being in a relationship.


    Links & Resources:

    Your Best Week Ever is designed to give the maximum impact for minimum effort. ****Ready to reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190


    Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190


    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-190&utm_term=podcast-190


    Connect with us! 👋


    Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander

    Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe


    Thanks Remi. Head to shopremi.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW to save up to 50%.

    Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co.

    Thanks Orgain. Head to Orgain.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 30% off your order.

    9 January 2025, 12:00 pm
  • 53 minutes 35 seconds
    Episode 189: Can We Have A Fresh Start? Or Is It Too Late?

    It’s officially 2025 and you might be feeling like your relationship could use a fresh start.

    We asked our Instagram audience if they’ve ever wished for a fresh start in their relationship—and the responses came pouring in! We’re reading through your submissions, sharing our thoughts, and offering practical advice for anyone looking to refresh their connection with their partner.

    Whether you’re dealing with intimacy, post-pregnancy, or even income issues, we’ve got you covered with tips to help you and your partner move forward and rekindle that spark.

    Links & Resources:

    Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Connect with us! 👋 Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

    Thanks Hungryroot. That’s Hungryroot.com/pillow, to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life.

    2 January 2025, 12:00 pm
  • 46 minutes 52 seconds
    Episode 188: Is Your Ultimatum Going To Work?

    We were feeling inspired… The Ultimatum is back on Netflix, and it was wild. It left us wondering if our own audience has ever given (or been given) a relationship ultimatum, so we asked!

    In this episode, we’re breaking down your ultimatums and sharing our opinions and advice. If you’ve ever considered giving an ultimatum - or if you’re just curious about the ones other people have issued - this is a must-listen!

    Links & Resources:

    Reignite your love life in just 7 days? ➡︎ https://shop.vmtherapy.com/your-best-week-ever/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Treat Your Partner to the Best F0replay they've ever had: https://shop.vmtherapy.com/foreplay-guides-2022/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Check out our NYT best selling book Sex Talks: ➡︎ https://sextalksbook.com/?ref=podcast-188&utm_term=podcast-188

    Connect with us! 👋 Instagram ➡︎ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander Our VIP Email list: ➡︎ https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe

    Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co.

    26 December 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 1 hour 8 minutes
    Episode 187: Am I The Asshole? The Holiday Edition Part 2

    Tis the Season for DRAMA!

    We’re so excited to bring you another hilarious “Am I The Asshole?” episode this week. In the theme of the season, we’re doing another holiday edition.

    We’re talking about affairs, secret Santa mishaps, and a disastrous salmon situation. Get ready to grab your coziest blanket and cup of cocoa for this new episode of one of our favorite series!


    Links & Resources:

    Join our VIP email list

    Follow us on Instagram


    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!


    Thanks ZocDoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.

    Thanks StoryWorth. Get $10 off your first purchase at StoryWorth.com/pillow

    19 December 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 59 minutes 14 seconds
    Episode 186: Period Sex, Internal Vs External Processors, & Queer In A Straight Relationship

    There are a ton of topics we want to cover on this podcast, but sometimes we just don’t have enough material to make a full hour-long episode for each one. So we’re trying something new to give you our hottest takes and tips… a multi-topic episode!

    Today we’re talking about being non-hetero in a male-female relationship, period sex, and internal versus external processors. Think of this episode like a podcast tossed salad and get ready to dive in.


    Links & Resources:

    Join our VIP email list

    Follow us on Instagram


    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!


    Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

    Thanks Miracle. Go to trymiracle.com/PILLOW and use the code PILLOW to claim your FREE 3-PIECE TOWEL SET and SAVE over 40% OFF.

    Thanks Unbound Merino. Head over to their website unboundmerino.com where new customers can use our code PILLOW for 15% off of their order!

    12 December 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 56 minutes 33 seconds
    Episode 185: How To Navigate Porn In Your Relationship

    Today we’re tackling one of the trickiest and most controversial topics we get asked about - porn.

    Is it OK to watch porn even if you’re in a relationship? Can it become addicting? Can you forbid your partner from watching it?

    In this episode we cover how porn affects you personally, pros and cons to bringing porn into your relationship, and what to do if you and your partner disagree. This is a topic that every couple needs to talk about in their relationship, so use this episode to open up a conversation!


    Links & Resources:

    Join our email list!

    Instagram: @vanessaandxander


    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!


    Thanks Chewy. Take advantage of amazing holiday savings and shop your personal favorites at Chewy.com/pillows.

    Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co

    Thanks Unbound Merino. Head over to their website unboundmerino.com where new customers can use our code PILLOW for 15% off of their order!

    5 December 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 57 minutes 47 seconds
    Episode 184: How To Get More Physical Intimacy From Your Partner

    Do you want more physical intimacy in your relationship? In this episode, we’re talking about different kinds of physical intimacy, why it’s so important, how to ask your partner for more, and what to do if you’re worried they won’t understand.

    Links & Resources:

    Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy

    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!

    Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.

    Thanks Jack Black. Go to GetJackBlack.com/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for 10% off your order.

    Thanks MarleySpoon. Experience the most personalized meal kit today with Marley Spoon. Head to MarleySpoon.com/OFFER/PILLOW and use code PILLOW for up to 25 FREE meals!

    27 November 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 55 minutes 9 seconds
    Episode 183: How To Get More Emotional Intimacy From Your Partner

    Do you want more emotional intimacy in your relationship? In today’s episode, we’re covering what emotional intimacy actually is, how to get more of it in your relationship, and even what to do if your partner doesn’t understand what you want.


    Links & Resources:

    Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy


    If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you had!


    Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/pillow

    Get started today with 15% off using code PILLOW at oneskin.co

    21 November 2024, 12:00 pm
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