Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

Kenneth Wilgus, Jessica Pfeiffer

A weekly podcast on parenting teens and launching them into the world. Hosted by Jessica Pfeiffer with Dr. Ken Wilgus, author of the book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You."

  • 23 minutes 40 seconds
    Episode 190: Adult Children Living at Home
    There are many circumstances when adult children need to live at home. Some parents think Planned Emancipation means that's a bad thing. It isn't. Today we discuss the advantages and pitfalls of adult kids at home. What should parents pay for? What do you do when your adult kid doesn't help out around the house? Is it a good thing when parents and their adult kids become each other's best friend? We answer these and other important questions. Spoiler alert: It's not THAT an adult child is living in your home but why and for how long. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    12 November 2024, 11:00 am
  • 20 minutes 14 seconds
    Episode 189: Adoption, Foster Care and Teenagers
    Today Jessica and Dr. Ken take on the issues related to teenagers who are adopted or are in foster care. Adolescence often brings up issues of identity and origin stories that can be upsetting to parents who have poured themselves into the lives of their teenagers. Dr. Ken suggests that adoptive and foster parents focus more on Planned Emancipation goals even when there's a strong impulse to slow this process down. We also focus on realistic goals that adoptive parents can maintain in order to fully appreciate their experience as parents of "chosen" kids. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    5 November 2024, 11:00 am
  • 24 minutes 30 seconds
    Episode 188: Great Communication With Teenagers
    What does great communication with teens really look like and how can parents achieve that? Dr. Ken and Jessica outline the aspects of the parent-teen relationship that usually cause trouble in communication (spoiler alert: control battles). Also we discuss the more nuanced issue of what great communication with adolescents should really look like. Should parents really have the goal of being so close to their adolescents that "we talk about everything"? Are there even times when a parent should actually tell their teenager, "I don't think you should be telling me this"? Is it a good goal for parents to want to be their teenagers' constant "go to" relationship through the trials of adolescence? You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    29 October 2024, 9:46 pm
  • 22 minutes 17 seconds
    Episode 187: When Planned Emancipation Doesn't Work
    Parents some times complain that they "tried" planned emancipation and it "didn't work." Today we talk about the common reasons for planned emancipation not seeming to have the impact parents expected. This is all covered in the new edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    22 October 2024, 10:00 am
  • 27 minutes 56 seconds
    Episode 186: Planned Emancipation - Second Edition
    As we prepare for the release of the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about the power of planned emancipation. This method is often mistaken for the practice of rewarding children's good behavior with more privileges. Planned emancipation, by contrast, recognizes the greater freedom that comes with just getting older. Parents who fearfully try to hang on to control end up weakening their influence on their adolescents. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    15 October 2024, 10:00 am
  • 17 minutes 41 seconds
    Episode 185: Teaching Parents To Release The Burden of Parenting
    In the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Dr. Ken explains why he added an entire chapter on the issue of burdened parents. We discuss the difficulty of providing information for parents while avoiding the appearance of having an "inside scoop" to guarantee happy, successful teenagers. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    8 October 2024, 10:00 am
  • 20 minutes 18 seconds
    Episode 184: Refocusing On Individuation - The Main Thing To Know About Teenagers
    We're getting ready for the release of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" second edition. This gives Jessica and Dr. Ken the chance to clarify the most important themes that are unique to this approach to parenting adolescents. Today we review individuation which is the most important need that adolescents have by far. This need is so important that Dr. Ken even worries that if your teen doesn't seem to be pushing for autonomy that's not a good thing at all. Also, we take on common misperceptions like individuation is "just like when they were a 2 year old." WRONG! You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    1 October 2024, 10:00 am
  • 25 minutes 38 seconds
    Episode 183: When Parents Are Suffering
    This was a tough episode. When parents are struggling with serious illness or other types of suffering, how should they handle their adolescent kids? Jessica talks about her own, recent diagnosis of multiple myeloma cancer and how it has impacted her adolescent and adult children. Dr. Ken talks about his wife's cancer battle 20 years ago when their children were young. There's a significant difference in how parents should deal with their kids when they are young vs. adolescents. In suffering, parents truly show their faith. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    24 September 2024, 10:00 am
  • 25 minutes 41 seconds
    Episode 182: Inside Out 2
    Today we talk about Pixar's big summer movie "Inside Out 2" in which the star, Riley, becomes a teenager. Although a really funny movie, Dr. Ken had a fair amount to complain about how we think about the inner life of teenagers. Jessica enjoyed it and so did her 13 year old daughter. Maybe Dr. Ken is just being a curmudgeon. You decide! You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    17 September 2024, 10:00 am
  • 30 minutes 35 seconds
    Episode 181: "The Anxious Generation"
    Today we talk about Jonathan Haidt's new book, "The Anxious Generation." He is a social psychologist and co-author of the book "The Coddling Of The American Mind." This new book reviews massive amounts of research and delivers what Dr. Ken thinks is a "slam dunk" answer to the debate about whether smartphones are damaging to the lives of children and adolescents. We discuss the concerning data and how smartphones, social media and pornography have contributed to significant increases in adolescent levels of anxiety and depression. As you can guess, we also talk about effective ways to delay and limit smartphone access while still inviting your teenager into the discussion and maintaining a path to autonomy. You can get "The Anxious Generation" book here: https://a.co/d/gvfk0JY You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    10 September 2024, 10:00 am
  • 35 minutes 16 seconds
    Episode 180: The Big Announcement: The Revised and Expanded, 2nd Edition of the Feeding Book Is Here!
    The second edition of the "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" book will drop on November 5th! Dr. Ken finally finished the work of updating and expanding the Planned Emancipation message. Listeners of this podcast will recognize the new material covered in the book since they are many of the topics we talked about on this podcast over that past four seasons including: - anxiety and depression - ADHD, Autism-spectrum disorders and neurodiversity - brain science and trauma - sexuality and gender identity - single parents - divorce and blended families - adoption - adult children at home - grandparents and teenagers Today we review how the new book is laid out and the new topics this second edition will cover. Of course, this new edition lays out the basic understanding of transitioning adolescents into full adulthood and all the "how-to's" that parents have relied on since publication of the first book. We're glad to be back and are getting fired up about "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" second edition! Pre-order the book here: https://a.co/d/77bAlpm Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
    3 September 2024, 10:00 am
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