Alice and Martha once again find themselves on different sides of the aisle regarding what exactly is happening in this chapter. However, we can all agree that the gleam of triumph in Dumbledore's eyes following Voldemort's return was thanks to the fact that he would no longer have to coerce Harry into becoming blood brothers with Ron. And in his underrated decision to return to life, Harry is the man in the million and seems to know it (after all, he is a jock who became a cop).

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Come in command central: Harry Potter is about to die. We repeat: Harry Potter is about to die. in a lesser reported story, Martha and Alice have a rare difference of Potter opinion and have very contrasting emotional responses to this chapter. You'll be edge of your seat, panting like Bellatrix, to hear how those chapter rankings play out!

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It's time for the prince's long-awaited T-A-L-E, in which not only the page number is highly significant, but the number 19 (or 20?) is as well. Grawp is missing a shoe (and we all know how expensive Danskos in that size are), Ron and Hermione completely dip on Harry, and Snivellus becomes somewhat more humanized. After all, sometimes we think we Sort too soon.

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Alice and Martha sound like Lucius as they discuss "the boy," who makes his way out of the castle and heads for the Shrieking Shack. Hagrid also makes his way out of the castle as the acromantulas get a bit restive. And finally, it's the ultimate flight of the Prince.

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In this crossover episode, The Real Weird Sisters (Alice and Martha) are joined by special guest Rob Cesternino (@robcesternino) and Penner's Sorting Fedora to sort the contestants of the upcoming Survivor Season 40: Winners at War into Hogwarts houses.

Be aware that the show contains spoilers from both Survivor and the Harry Potter series.

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Book club episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Luckily for you, Alice and Martha have not, to use the common phrase, done a bunk this week, though they might have to if all the Slytherin listeners start coming for them! Harry tracks down the Gray Lady, who really might want to consider taking out a restraining order on "The Baron," and finds his way to the Room of Hidden Things to get his hands on the the die-dum. And don't forget that in the midst of all this chaos, the Battle of Hogwarts has officially begun, and Percy is about to make Fred laugh for the first and last time. :(

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It's too bad Flight of the Prince has already been taken, because that really would have been a much better title for this chapter--well, or, The Carrows Come to Call. While Ron and Hermione rush off to find a "bathroom," Harry acts on Dumbledore's orders and tries to tract down the missing diadem (which, in case you forgot, is a bit like a crown). Finally, as the entire DA and Order rush out to fight in a most organized fashion, the prodigal Weasley son returns and finally gets to meet his sister-in-law.

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Spoiler warning! Please be aware that our show contains spoilers for events which take place later in the series.

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In this crossover episode, The Real Weird Sisters (Alice and Martha) are joined by special guest Kirsten MacInnis (@kirstensaidwhat) and the Sorting Circle to sort the contestants of season one of The Circle (US).

Be aware that the show contains spoilers from both The Circle (US) and the Harry Potter series.

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Neville's back, and he's a changed man, from his newfound confidence to his shrunken arm. At the same time, gossip king Terry Boot can barely contain his excitement, Michael Corner considers opening a bar (though the name is still undecided) and Cho Chang, Harry's ex-girlfriend, is as tempting as ever. All of this chaos does not impress Harry, who just wants to find the lost diadem (which is a bit like a crown).

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Spoiler warning! Please be aware that our show contains spoilers for events which take place later in the series.

Book club episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

In the process of persuading the GOAT of his commitment to the mission, Harry ends up convincing himself, and proceeds with his nice job, which is the sort of thing you’d expect an unqualified wizard kid to be able to do without overstretching themselves. Meanwhile, Ron stuffs himself with cheese and mead, though he definitely missed the opportunity for some firewhisky- that bloke definitely would have sold him anything, he wouldn't care.

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Heh! $%&*#!! Three highly edible humans take a joyride on the back of a dragon - in case you hadn't noticed, they just broke out of Gringotts. They're covered in burns, but it's nothing a little dittany and pumpkin juice can't fix. At least they're not wearing the cup around their necks, that would look weird! And to wrap up this very short chapter, Harry gets a highly gratifying "I told you so moment" when the location of the last Horcrux is confirmed.

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Spoiler warning! Please be aware that our show contains spoilers for events which take place later in the series.

Book club episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!