It's Q&A time! We're back, answering YOUR burning questions! If you have a tumultuous relationship history, is "boring" maybe a good thing? If you feel yourself becoming resentful in your relationship because your sacrifices outnumber your partner's, what to do? And not one, not two, but THREE heavy-hitting platonic friendship questions! What does Shandy consider a "friendship-reconsidering" level crime? Come join us in our living room for the Shandy take!

Thanks to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.FastGrowingTrees.com and use code SHANDY at checkout for an additional 15% off!

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Time Stamps:

0:00 - Q1: Does Healthy = Boring?

10:35 - Q2: My Friend Accused Me Of “Bitching & Complaining” And Our Friendship Is Suddenly Over—What Happened?!

23:50 - Q3: My Friend Moved Out Of Town And Now Zoom-Joins Our In-Person Hangs—Am I The Asshole For Disliking This?

33:46 - Q4: Should I Let My Friend’s Outrageous Wedding Request Make Me See Her Differently?

46:03 - Q5: I’ve Sacrificed More For This Relationship Than My Boyfriend Has And Am Feeling Resentful—Help!

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

Follow us!

Dear Shandy - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Sharleen Joynt - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Andy Levine - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

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At the heart of so many relationship questions we've received—and relationships in general—is a common thread: EMPATHY. This "healing force", as our esteemed guest calls it, has the power to not only heal our relationships with others, but with ourselves. So why do so few of us understand its powers?

Today we're honored to be joined by THE foremost expert on empathy, Dr. Judith Orloff, dubbed “the godmother of the empath movement.” Dr. Orloff is a board-certified psychiatrist and the New York Times best-selling author of several books, including 2017's landmark "The Empath’s Survival Guide" and her latest, "The Genius of Empathy: Practical Skills to Heal Your Sensitive Self, Your Relationships, and the World". Today she helps dispel the misconceptions around empathy, demonstrates how to draw healthy boundaries, and explains the transformative, healing power of SELF-empathy. She explains why it's OK that your partner isn't the same empathy "type" as you, whether or not you can have too much empathy, and how to approach someone whose beliefs you fundamentally disagree with. Today's conversation is the warm hug you needed and will hopefully inspire healing in your more complicated relationships, especially the one you have with yourself.

Thank you to our sponsor!

- Go to https://www.rocketmoney.com/SHANDY to save money and cancel unwanted subscriptions with just a few taps!

More Dr. Judith Orloff:

- The book, "The Genius Of Empathy": https://bit.ly/3U6uCRk

- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/judith.orloff.md

- Website: https://drjudithorloff.com

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Welcome To The Legendary Dr. Judith Orloff!

3:41 - What Is Empathy & Empathy Vs Compassion

5:10 - What Are Her Thoughts On The Term “Empath” Becoming Mainstream?

6:52 - The Biggest Misconceptions About Empathy

10:32 - Drawing Boundaries

16:19 - Is Empathy Something We’re Born With? Nature Vs Nurture

17:31 - Can One Really Become *More* Empathic?

20:38 - The Empathy Types

23:13 - Mismatched Empathy In Relationships

29:19 - Tips For Self Empathy

31:24 - How Can I Make Empathy Work In A Way That Isn’t Ultimately To My Disadvantage?

34:04 - Is Self Awareness A Prerequisite to Self Empathy?

34:54 - Tips For Avoiding Empathy-Deficient Types

37:10 - When It Feels Like Someone Doesn’t Deserve Empathy

39:19 - Empathy Vs Enablement

43:29 - Is There Such A Thing As Too Much Empathy?

45:12 - Sharleen’s Takeaways

46:11 - Tips For Empathizing With Someone Whose Beliefs You Fundamentally Disagree With

49:06 - Shandy Debrief

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Just 3 weeks after our Love Fest with Gerry Turner and Theresa Nist, the couple announced in a Good Morning America interview that, after only 3 months of marriage, they're getting divorced. Many of you wanted to hear our take on this bombshell news, particularly in the wake of such a recent Love Fest. So today, in a first-of-its-kind bonus episode, we're answering your burning questions Q&A style.

Thanks to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.cozyearth.com and use promo code SHANDY at checkout to save 35%!

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Our Love Fest with Gerry and Theresa:

https://youtu.be/hWCr91mBGb0?si=y_xga_xJH9MhReo3

Referenced "bet" of Andy's:

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Ce-GWUtDbhq/?igsh=Znhkamk2bGhrNDAw

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Introduction

2:41 - How Shocked Is Shandy?

6:46 - When Did You Record The Love Fest With Gerry & Theresa?

7:29 - Was Dear Shandy The Source Of The Tea That They Were Living Apart?

10:07 - Why Do You Think It Didn’t Work Out?

16:20 - When Recording The Love Fest, Did You Sense Anything Was Off?

20:28 - Do You Think They Were Honest On Your Love Fest?

20:39 - Did ABC Push Them To Come On Dear Shandy?

21:20 - Is There A Dear Shandy Love Fest Curse?

26:07 - Did Andy Bet Money On How Long They Would Last?

27:00 - Do You Think 3 Months Was Enough To Determine It Wouldn’t Work?

27:10 - If You Two Met At Gerry & Theresa’s Age And Lived Far Apart, What Would You Have Done?

29:00 - Does This Make You Love The Golden Bachelor Less?

29:44 - Do You Think Gerry Will Get Back Together With Leslie?

30:25 - Should Golden Bachelor Follow A Love Is Blind Format And Cast People From The Same City?

31:06 - Should The Franchise Scrap Golden Bachelorette?

32:27 - Why Do You Think They Did The Televised Wedding & Do You Think Production Feels Guilty?

34:37 - Bonus Question 

35:03 - Closing Thoughts

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe - https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

Listen on iTunes - https://bit.ly/DearShandyiTunes

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

She's baaaack! For the first time ever, and by popular request, we've brought BACK a Hot Topic guest to pick up where we left off! Our first episode with Maria Avgitidis—4th generation matchmaker and host of the Ask A Matchmaker podcast—was such a hit that you asked for more! In case you missed our Confessions Of A Matchmaker episode with Maria, aka Part 1, it's here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dear-shandy/id1525795747?i=1000597672805

Today Maria returns to answer follow up questions from Part 1, but also to give us her tough-love and honest take on the rules of dating. Sharpen your pencils, Shandies, because Dating School is in session! How is swipe culture affecting dating today? What's Maria's 12-Date Method, and her Pre-Date 3-2-1 Prep? Who pays on the first date, and does she believe in living together before getting engaged? Finally, what is Maria's "controversial" opinion, and will Shandy agree or disagree? As always, Maria's brutal honesty is a breath of fresh air and Shandy's delighted to welcome her back!

Thank you to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.drinkAG1.com/DEARSHANDY to get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D3K2 AND 5 Free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase!

- Go to https://www.apostrophe.com/SHANDY and use our code SHANDY to get your first visit for only five dollars!

- Go to https://www.FastGrowingTrees.com and use code SHANDY at checkout for an additional 15% off!

- Go to https://jennikayne.com and use code DEARSHANDY to get 15% off your first order!

- Go to https://www.shopbeam.com/SHANDY and use code SHANDY at checkout for up to 40% off!

More Maria:

- Agape Match: https://agapematch.com

- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matchmakermaria

- Ask A Matchmaker Podcast: https://plinkhq.com/i/1521530338?to=page

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Welcome BACK To Matchmaker Maria!

2:41 - How Does She Define Her 93% Success Rate?

8:49 - What’s The Most Awkward Conversation She’s Had To Have With A Client?

11:38 - Decisions Paying Clients Make That Frustrate Her

16:21 - What Would She Say To People Who Think Her Matchmaking Fees Are Too High?

24:46 - How Swipe Culture Affects The World Of Matchmaking

29:01 - The 12-Date Rule

40:30 - Pre-Date 3-2-1 Prep

47:44 - Who Pays On The First Date?

52:29 - Maria’s Controversial Opinion

56:30 - What If Someone Never Gets Asked On A Second Date?

59:39 - Living Together Before Getting Engaged

1:09:01 - Moving For Love & “Importing”

1:14:53 - Shandy Debrief

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's Q&A time! We're back, answering YOUR burning questions! How important is "niceness" in a partner, and is it enough? If you have a massive crush on someone out of town, how do you escalate from casual, sporadic dates to long-distance relationship? If you and your partner agree to boycott an establishment and he lies about having caved, is this a red flag? Finally, an epic Am-I-The-Asshole question, board game edition! Come join us in our living room for the Shandy take!

Thanks to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.cbdistillery.com and use code SHANDY for 20% off!

- Go to https://oakessentials.com and use promo code SHANDY15 for 15% off your first order plus a free gift!

- Go to https://www.FastGrowingTrees.com and use code SHANDY at checkout for an additional 15% off!

- Go to https://www.squarespace.com/SHANDY for 10% off your first website or domain!

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Introduction

0:54 - Q1: Is “Nice” Enough?

7:06 - Q2: My BF Lied About Visiting An Establishment We Had Agreed To Boycott—Is This A Red Flag?

21:28 - Q3: I Have A Huge Crush On A Girl & Don’t Know How To Escalate Things—Help!

42:37 - Q4: The Transient Nature Of My Career Has Left Me Unmotivated To Date—Help!

53:08 - Q5: Am I The Asshole, Board Game Edition

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

Follow us!

Dear Shandy - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Sharleen Joynt - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Andy Levine - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's GOLDEN Love Fest time! 🎉 Today Shandy is joined by a couple whose love story they are very familiar with, as Charity's season was hotly recapped here at Dear Shandy! The world fell in love with Charity & Dotun's relationship, and Shandy is thrilled to have them join for what can truly be described as a double date!

Today Charity and Dotun give the juiciest, most satisfying and SPECIFIC answers about their first impressions, common misconceptions, beliefs that have changed, and of course, how they fight! Finally, a hilariously exhausting Newlyweds Game, exhausting because too much fun was being had! Who knows who better? Watch on to find out!

Thanks to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.shopbeam.com/SHANDY and use code SHANDY at checkout for up to 40% off!

- Go to https://quince.com/SHANDY for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns!

Go to https://www.rocketmoney.com/SHANDY to save money and cancel unwanted subscriptions the easy way!

- Head to https://www.factormeals.com/SHANDY50 and use code SHANDY50 to get 50% off!

More Charity:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/charitylawson

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@charity.lawson

More Dotun:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dotunolubeko

TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@dotunolubeko

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Welcome To Charity & Dotun!

4:20 - Is Shandy Together?

5:23 - First Impressions

20:20 - How They Complement Each Other

23:10 - How Their Partner Is Different Than They Imagined For Themselves

31:50 - Early Hurdle

35:59 - How They Fight

42:25 - Most Common Misconception

49:49 - Beliefs About Relationships That Have Changed

55:33 - The Newlyweds Game

1:14:53 - Shandy Debrief

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe - https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

Listen on iTunes - https://bit.ly/DearShandyiTunes

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shandy is back with The Bachelor, Season 28 recaps! Today we're breaking down the Finale and After The Final Rose!

Thank you to our sponsors...

- Go to https://prose.com/DEARSHANDY for 50% off your first subscription order today!

- Go to https://www.zocdoc.com/SHANDY and download the ZocDoc app for FREE!

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- Go to https://www.babbel.com/DEARSHANDY to save 55% off your subscription!

- Go to https://www.FastGrowingTrees.com and use code SHANDY at checkout for an additional 15% off!

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Housekeeping

1:39 - Finale Kick Off

3:07 - Joey’s Family

10:31 - Daisy’s Final Date

17:52 - Kelsey’s Final Date

22:15 - Proposal Day

24:51 - Daisy & Kelsey

28:18 - The Breakup

35:27 - The Proposal

37:14 - After The Final Rose

42:07 - Bachelorette

51:10 - Andy’s A-Game

52:12 - Shandy Word Watch

53:32 - Night One Predictions

54:58 - Special Introduction

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's GOLDEN Love Fest time! 🎉 Today Shandy is joined by none other than the Golden Bachelor himself, Gerry Turner, and his blushing bride, Theresa Nist! The world stopped to watch these two fall in love late last year, then again when they tied the knot on live television in January, and Shandy is beyond thrilled to host this exclusive post-wedding interview! (Psst: turns out Theresa is a Shandy!!!)

Today Gerry and Theresa describe how they complement each other, their love languages, what their early hurdle has been (spoiler alert: it's ongoing!), and of course, how they fight! Finally, a delightful Newlyweds Game revealing many fun tidbits about this beautiful couple! Who knows who better? Watch on to find out!

Thanks to our sponsors!

- Go to https://www.earthbreeze.com/SHANDY for 40% off your subscription!

- Go to https://www.drinkAG1.com/DEARSHANDY to get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D3K2 AND 5 Free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase!

More Gerry:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/goldengerryturner/

More Theresa:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/theresa_nist/

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Welcome To Gerry & Theresa!

2:34 - First Impressions 

6:32 - Three Adjectives

8:13 - How They Complement Each Other

13:00 - Gerry Becoming Golden Bachelor

15:29 - Love Languages

16:46 - Early Hurdle

22:24 - How They Fight

25:27 - Common Misconceptions

28:01 - Beliefs That Have Changed

30:29 - Love Advice

32:17 - The Newlyweds Game

44:14 - Shandy Debrief

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe - https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

Listen on iTunes - https://bit.ly/DearShandyiTunes

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shandy is back with The Bachelor, Season 28 recaps! Today we're breaking down episode 10, aka Women Tell All!

Thank you to our sponsors...

- Go to https://oakessentials.com and use promo code SHANDY15 for 15% off your first order plus a free gift!

- Go to https://www.squarespace.com/SHANDY for 10% off your first website or domain!

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Housekeeping

0:30 - Women Tell All Kick Off

4:17 - The Hashing Out Of Drama

12:11 - Lexi Hot Seat

12:55 - Jenn Hot Seat

16:39 - Maria Hot Seat

24:23 - Tulum/Last Week’s “Cliffhanger”

29:59 - Rose Ceremony

31:17 - Rachel Hot Seat

35:32 - Joey Hot Seat

36:16 - Bloopers

39:32 - Previews

40:05 - Shandy Predictions

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

By extremely popular demand, Shandy is back to recapping Love Is Blind, Season 6! Today we're breaking down the Reunion!

Thanks to our sponsors...

- Go to https://www.cozyearth.com:/SHANDY and use promo code SHANDY at checkout to save up to 35%!

- Go to https://www.lomi.com/SHANDY and use promo code SHANDY at checkout to save $50!

- Go to https://prose.com/DEARSHANDY for 50% off your first subscription order today!

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Housekeeping + Surprise For Andy

1:33 - Overall Thoughts

6:13 - Sharleen’s Best Dressed

7:56 - Amy & Johnny

9:25 - Jeramey, Sarah Ann & Laura

19:11 - Trevor

25:04 - AD & Clay

31:52 - Highlights

36:36 - Jessica & Jimmy

40:05 - Megan Fox

43:31 - Chelsea

45:39 - Brittany & Kenneth

48:26 - Matthew

50:13 - Chelsea & Kwame

50:56 - The End

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shandy is back with The Bachelor, Season 28 recaps! Today we're breaking down episode 9, aka Fantasy Suites!

Thank you to our sponsors...

- Go to https://www.cbdistillery.com and use code SHANDY for 20% off!

- Go to https://jennikayne.com and use code DEARSHANDY to get 15% off your first order!

- Go to https://www.cozyearth.com:/SHANDY and use code SHANDY at checkout for up to 35%!

Thanks to our Word Watch sponsor...

- Go to https://www.lomi.com/SHANDY and use code SHANDY for $50 off your Lomi!

- Go to https://furanostudio.etsy.com and use code SHANDY20 for 20% off!

Time Stamps:

0:00 - Housekeeping

1:58 - Episode 9 Kick Off

2:31 - Rachel

8:38 - Kelsey

15:13 - Daisy

23:56 - Cliffhanger

30:39 - Andy’s A-Game

32:00 - Shandy Word Watch

35:20 - Shandy’s Predictions

If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected]

Subscribe and watch the episodes on YouTube! https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy

More Dear Shandy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy

Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy

More Sharleen

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt

Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com

More Andy

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine

Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dear-shandy/donations

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices