Episode 2: 4 Mindful Responses to Gaslighting
Mindful responses to gaslighting.Â
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The gaslighter is behaving as though, "I never told you that, Dan. I mean, really." And while they're gaslighting you and trying to throw you onto the bus, they might say things to you such as, "I don't think that's exactly how it. Are you sure you're remembering things correctly? I mean, you know how you are. You know how he is."Â
If they try to pull that type of bullshit with you in front of other people, remember-- we train people how to treat us, so we must put a stop to this behavior and here are a few phrases to help you do that:
Phrase number one: I know what I saw. I know what I heard. I know what happened.Â
Now those are three different phrases, but choose one of them and stick to it. And remember the broken record and the, that may be, but the broken record and the, that may be but is one of the most effective, powerful communication tactics of them all and can really save you a lot of time and heartache and it shows such strength when you use it correctly.
If somebody, for example, says to something like that-- if somebody says, "Dan, are you sure that you remember things correct?"
"I know what happened." That is it.Â
Do not explain yourself. Do not defend yourself. "I mean, You can sometimes be forgetful."Â
"That may be, but I know what happened."
"Oh, Dan, you are so dramatic."
"That may be, but I know what happened."
I'm going to give you some more tactics that are a little bit more advanced, and if you are coming home from work, feeling exhausted or feeling sick because of some gas lighter at work. Keep reading.Â
We can all learn to have conversations that create miracles. Remember that a miracle is a shift in perception.
And if you perceive me as somebody who's going to allow you to gaslight me and tarnish my reputation and impune my integrity right here in front of all of my peers, I need a miracle to retrain you how to treat me.Â
And before I give you the next one, what are the types of phrases that you have become accustomed to or that you've heard or that you can recognize as gaslighting?
Please put that in the comments below, and I'd like to respond to those. And also I'd like you to respond to what I'm saying. What do you think of it? Would you think that your gaslight would simply keep gaslighting? What would you think they would say to it? How would you respond to it? Are you a gas lighter?
How would you respond to it, , and how would you respond to the other comments that people are leaving? Please leave your comments and I'd like to really start a discussion about what's going on, because it's not okay. What's going on? You know what I mean? It is not okay that we have suddenly as a society awakened in some type of post-apocalyptic zombie wasteland, where people are being encouraged to and given license to treat each other in the most horrible, loveless, ruthless way that is devoid of any civility and is hurting people every day.
That's not okay. So I'd like to start a discussion on it and see what you say about what I'm saying, about what other people are saying, what people have said to you. Please let me know so that we can all talk about it and address this issue. Maybe we should all be going in that direction. Maybe we should all try to compete for the blue ribbon of the ugliest most unenlightened communicator in the office.
7 November 2022, 2:00 pm