Here's What I Don't Get

Tab Birt

A weekly podcast about the things in life that piss us off, or outright confuse the heck out of us. The show is co-hosted by rocker Uncle Buck (based in North Carolina), and Tab Birt (based out of the land of Praying Hands).

  • 1 hour 54 minutes
    Episode 365 - Calendar Show

    This week we're joined by JamieDlux and talking about mustaches linktr.ee/moghvember

    Emotional Exhibitionism
    Vice in Virtuous Clothing

    This was recorded before the election, but holy hell did we see some more proud cry babies on the internet this week. It's worse than 2016 was. Why do these people take pride in being wound up by the world around them, it's pathetic.

    These days as we continue to slide into degeneracy, the masters of the simulation try to make it seem like they aren't trying to poison our souls by having degenerate behavior minorly fund something that seems proper.

    Additionally I'm taking part in Movember re termed Moghvember with some coworkers. We're raising funds for Peter and Paul Community Services here in St. Louis which services Men's homelessness. You can donate to one or all of us at Linktr.ee/Moghvember

    8 November 2024, 5:52 am
  • 1 hour 46 minutes
    Episode 364 - Hot in Here

    This week we're talking about

    Blaming Climate Change
    Days of Infamy

    8 November 2024, 5:49 am
  • 1 hour 45 minutes
    Episode 363 - TGD

    El Chaco had an audio issue at the top of the show. I've taken his solo intro and attached it to the end. If you want an update on his horrific neighbors and can make it through the noise it's on the end.

    This week we're talking about

    Sudden Genre Death
    App Deliveries

    8 November 2024, 5:43 am
  • 1 hour 38 minutes
    Episode 362 - I'd Buy That For...

    Chaco and Tab are back again this week, allergies are in full swing across the globe but these brave men soldier on in the face of adversity speaking on...

    Loud Music
    Dollar Store Derision

    Everyone love's music, but you know what nobody loves your stupid music. Turn the knob down dillweed, we need not be subjected to your poor taste. There are about a hundred ways to listen to your music without affecting others. And audio engineers, if that's what you really are, turn your garbage system down. I shouldn't be experiencing physical pain at your concert, turn your amps down.

    Dollar stores are everywhere. With low prices, under paid employees, crappy selection, and even worse quality, they're taking over the market. Rather than fix the problem in our society, commerce being regulated into oblivion, fuel costs skyrocketing as we demonize fossil fuels and limit production, increasing the minimum wage so worthless people can be paid more than I made as an assistant restaurant manager 15 years ago on their first day at mcdonalds, where they still can't stop putting ice in my drinks. No we need to stop the stores from existing, don't fix the culture of poverty, stop the stores.

    All of that plus job advice, Chaco is in limbo, and your voicemails.

    12 September 2024, 12:56 am
  • 2 hours 7 minutes
    Episode 361 - Descent into Barbie Girls

    Joel and Tab return from the shapeless void, with 7% more estrogen in their blood and no way to redeem it, they're complaining about...

    People Who Don't Respect Sundays
    Plastics
    Rewards Programs

    Sure we should all be absolutely irate at the fact that our grandparents raised 5+ kids on less than $40,000 a year and only one income. What we should really be irate about though, is that our grandparents worked that one job, and when they left Friday afternoon, they we basically unreachable until the following Monday. Not any more, now your boss can insert themselves into your life about any stupid bullshit, at literally anytime of day or night. Then you get some absolute BS of, "You didn't answer my call on Saturday, you're not being a team player." Bitch I am not on the clock, leave me the hell alone.

    60 years ago when plastics first hit the scene, it was a miracle material, light, flexible, and nigh indestructible. Now we're learning the true meaning of that last part. As more and more plastics are created it is slowly killing us. We may have fixed the toxic pollutants of the industrial revolution, but we replaced them with something far more insidious and longer lasting.

    Have we covered rewards programs on this program? Sure multiple times, but they keep screwing us over so we're going to keep bringing it in. Be sure to get your card stamped for this version of rewards programs, after 10 you get a free cockpunch.

    All of that plus news, and your voicemails!

    4 September 2024, 1:35 am
  • 2 hours 19 minutes
    Episode 360 - No Scope ft. Larry Bleidner

    Larry Bleidner returns to the show, completing the full cycle. Beginning this week we go back to talking about forklifts, Paraguayan Wrestling, and rooting for Trump. You don't remember what was said 7 years ago, we're just going to start recycling the same tired material and raking in the patreon dollars.

    We're revisiting...

    Throw Pillows, Birthday Weeks, 12-Story Falls, Commie Lovers, Mid-Life Crises
    Stress
    Incompetent Druggists
    Inconsiderate Gym Goers

    They say Fear is the mind killer, but it's not. Stress is the mind killer, it's literally killing all of us constantly, yet we do nothing to adequately control it. In fact sometimes stress causes a reaction that only induces more stress. That's why I am declaring War on stress, anyone who is still stressed by the end of this episode, will be summarily executed.

    It's not enough these days to medicate every condition under the sun into submission, no these days we need to finely combine so many assembled chemicals to be right on the edge of poisoning ourselves or curing an affliction. Enter the pharmacists, and assistants, you'd think they'd follow one of the rules of acquisition about returning customers, but no they're totally okay with you OD'ing, just as long as they get that smoke break.

    Courtesy basically doesn't exist anymore. No where is that more evident these days than the gym. Dudes with 3 sets of free weights, texting on their phones. Girls camping on the leg lift machine, texting on their phone. People of both genders standing where you're trying to walk, TEXTING ON THEIR PHONE. Put the phone down and lift.

    All of that plus a revisit of episode 1, news of how much the government hates you, and your voicemails.

    27 August 2024, 4:23 am
  • 1 hour 57 minutes
    Episode 359 - Endless Frustration

    Chaco and Tab embarked on a thrilling adventure through the dense jungle, navigating treacherous terrain and avoiding deadly traps set by ancient civilizations. As they ventured deeper into the unknown, they stumbled upon a hidden temple, where they uncovered ancient artifacts and mysterious scrolls that held the secrets of the long-lost city. With their curiosity piqued, Chaco and Tab pressed on, determined to unravel the mysteries of the forgotten metropolis, specifically...

    Lore Breaking
    Artificial Intelligence as a Service

    Lore breaking can be a problem because it disrupts the narrative, causing confusion and frustration among fans who are familiar with the original story. It can also damage the trust between creators and audiences, leading to a loss of interest and engagement with future content. Furthermore, lore breaking can compromise the integrity of storytelling by prioritizing shock value over coherence and consistency. Additionally, it can lead to fan entitlement, where fans feel they have a right to dictate what happens in the story. Overall, lore breaking can have negative consequences for the story's overall impact and the audience's enjoyment.

    AI as a Service (AIaaS) is a problem because it allows companies to outsource their AI development to third-party providers, potentially compromising data security and control. It also raises concerns about bias and transparency in AI decision-making, as the underlying algorithms and data may not be transparent or accountable. Furthermore, AIaaS can lead to a lack of customization and flexibility, as users are limited to the pre-existing solutions offered by the provider. Additionally, AIaaS can create a dependence on a single provider, making it difficult for companies to switch or innovate independently. Overall, AIaaS can hinder innovation and limit the potential benefits of AI adoption.

    All of that plus they also discuss their personal favorite sci-fi movies featuring AI, with Chaco revealing a surprising fondness for the 1984 film "The Terminator".

    24 July 2024, 3:22 am
  • 2 hours 24 minutes
    Episode 358 - Homos Naked

    El Chaco is on the show this time, and WE'VE BROKEN THE CURSE! Talking about...

    Doctors
    An Ill Fit

    Society reveres doctors, probably too much. We constantly lionize them all for the acts of just a few. For every person that has a good doctor experience there are 10 who spent years going to doctors to never be properly diagnosed. When they do diagnose you I can guarantee the solution is going to be some expensive prescription medication, and not diet and exercise. To hell with doctors.

    Stability is not something that I have had a ton of in my life. As of this writing I have now lived in the same home for just over 2 years. Which is the longest I've lived in any home in my adult life. I think the longest I lived in any home was 6 years, maybe 7? It is crazy how often my mom moved us.

    All of that plus a new news segment, catching up with Chaco, and once again, WE BROKE THE CURSE!

    13 July 2024, 3:31 am
  • 1 hour 5 minutes
    Episode 357 - Hammer Bros

    Chaco makes a cameo to start us off, but then it is Buck and Tab off to the races talking about...

    AI Alarmists
    Eschewing Practices & Standards

    Every new piece of technology is supposedly the end of the world. Some of the predictions are correct others are way off base. The latest boogey man is AI, is it coming to take your jerb? I sure hope so. How else are we going to get rid of all this extra welfare money?

    Sometimes we need to innovate to keep growing, that's a great example of why AI will always fail. Other times we need to go back to basics and just do what works. Two guys talking about work problems and reading some weekly news. When you never do the basics, you have no jumping off point to try something new, especially when you fall consistently on your face.

    All of that plus suicidal robots, suicidal boomers, and a gamer beef blown out of proportion.

    3 July 2024, 2:55 am
  • 1 hour 8 minutes
    Episode 356 - Nine Days in Tulsa

    Tab is riding solo in this one, catching up on the happenings of life, talking about...

    The Death of a Mentor
    Sh!tty Brothers

    Finding someone who helped mold you as a person is something only the very lucky get. To have someone choose to be a part of making you a whole person is a gift. Losing that person in your life is truly devastating.

    Call it Toxic Masculinity, outdated thinking, or old fashioned values, but family is supposed to look out for one another, and a brother should look after his sisters. That's your purpose at least until you have children of your own. I'm so sick of weak men that won't do the right thing, and it starts right there at home.

    All of that plus the saga of going to Tulsa, Penis Cancer, and your voicemails!

    26 June 2024, 2:22 am
  • 2 hours 12 minutes
    Episode 355 - Feels Good Man

    Welcome back again HWIDGites. El Chaco and Tab are back once again to nitpick life's greatest distractions. Can these men beat the curse? Listen and find out as the rail against;

    Hedonism
    Serving Sizes

    Sometimes short term gains net in long term major problems. Our lives have become so addicted to convenience and pleasure, many find it impossible to deal with life's most minor annoyances. The more we as a society continue feeding our pleasure centers with the least work possible, the softer and softer men we're going to create. The true irony is that by not doing those things, holding out a little longer, you can gain even greater appreciation for life and its rewards.

    The other thing our society is completely built upon, is lies. Everything is constantly lying to you. Great taste and low calories! No it tastes like sucrose infested ass. Companies make these giant dispensers for products, and half of it is pure waste just to get you to buy again sooner. The worst part is, it totally works because half the population is functionally disabled mentally.

    All of that plus a backlog of voicemails, news of the week, and MORE EPISODES!

    4 June 2024, 5:17 pm
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