Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson

1 hour 19 minutes

Healing Attachment Wounds with Elizabeth Ferreira
Attachment wounds are emotional injuries that develop based on painful experiences with those we care about. These experiences create a kind of blueprint we carry around for how relationships work, and when that internal model is based on fear and pain, it's hard for our relationships to thrive. Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins the show to help us understand how we can heal old wounds and develop more secure forms of relating.
Elizabeth and Forrest explore how early experiences shape our relationships, with a particular focus on a common paradox: deeply wanting connection while simultaneously fearing intimacy. They discuss fearful attachment, how Elizabeth approaches working with attachment wounds in clinical practice, complex PTSD, self-abandonment, facing our dreaded experience, setting healthy boundaries, and navigating relationships where fearful attachment patterns are present.
About our Guest: Elizabeth Ferreira is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist working in California. She specializes in somatic approaches to trauma work.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:05: Elizabeth’s personal experience of fearful attachment
7:40: Working with a therapist to heal attachment
11:55: Elizabeth’s experience learning to create boundaries
21:35: Internal Family Systems, and how to dialog with our parts
27:15: Working with our protective part, and self-criticism
31:00: Dialoguing with our inner child without a therapist
38:15: Healthy anger, grief, and patience
42:25: What helped Elizabeth be vulnerable in relating to Forrest
53:10: Disorganized moments, identifying needs, and taking in the good
1:00:20: Intent, impact, and reasonable limits
1:05:20: Becoming your own secure attachment figure, and healing in community
1:09:10: Recap
I am now writing on Subståack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
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Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
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20 January 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 6 minutes

Limerence, Love, and Life Transitions: January Mailbag
Dr. Rick and Forrest begin the mailbag by exploring limerence – an obsessive form of romantic attraction – and offer practical recommendations for working with one-sided infatuation. They then discuss what to do when romantic vulnerability feels unsafe, and how we can rebuild trust in others after traumatic experiences. The episode also tackles managing career transitions, dealing with social anxiety around positive interactions, and maintaining boundaries without being consumed by anger.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
0:50: What can I do when I experience limerence, or compulsive romantic attraction?
18:00: How can I learn to trust my partner and embrace the experience of happiness in my relationship?
26:50: How can I best think about the inherent uncertainty in the 2-3 years of preparation for a new career path?
37:55: How can I learn to “take in the good” when good experiences feel uncomfortable for me?
44:55: How can I maintain important boundaries in a way that doesn’t lead to me feeling too much anger?
56:40: Recap
I am now writing on Subståack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Head to acorns.com/beingwell or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
13 January 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 7 minutes

Navigating Situationships: How to Get What You Really Want
Forrest and Dr. Rick explore "situationships" – those poorly defined, boundary-free relationships that exist in a gray area between friendship and committed dating. They unpack why these arrangements have become so common, examine the emotional trade-offs that keep people stuck, and share how to reclaim a sense of agency and build more authentic connections. The episode includes a role-play where Forrest plays someone struggling with situationships, while Dr. Rick draws on his decades of experience as a couples counselor to offer guidance.
Rick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWB
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:35: What is a situationship?
7:25: The benefits of a situationship, and relationship asymmetry
13:05: A roleplay of sharing your feelings
20:55: Uncertainty, wanting to be liked, and the fear of asking for what you want
31:10: Gears of rapport, and knowing your worth
38:05: Honoring yourself when a change is needed
48:05: How much to care, and the natural arc of change
52:35: Early indicators that someone is ready for a relationship
58:55: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Head to acorns.com/beingwell or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
6 January 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 16 minutes

Beyond Resolutions: Discover What You Want in 2025
Why do New Year's resolutions usually fail by February? Forrest and Dr. Rick explore why traditional goal-setting falls short and offer a new approach to creating lasting change. They discuss how we can uncover our authentic wants and needs, move away from a punishment mindset, and use our new knowledge to find fulfillment. This episode will teach you how to get more out of any other New Year’s content you listen to.
Rick and Forrest walk through a practical example of brain dumping “shoulds,” shifting the focus from means to ends, and working with internal resistance. They end the episode with a role-play focused on working with someone who wants to find a more meaningful relationship.
Rick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWB
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:35: Fulfillment as a target, and other healthy ways of orienting to our goals
14:00: Cataloguing our “shoulds”, and being driven by a sense of enthusiasm
23:20: How Forrest has personally connected with his authentic wants
30:15: The “punishment part”
35:50: Practical techniques for identifying our values
41:45: A roleplay focused on how to find a meaningful relationship
51:25: Reviewing the roleplay
55:05: Knowing your why
59:50: Developing your personal psychology, and surrendering to the best within you
1:03:40: Recap
I am writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Head to acorns.com/beingwell or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
30 December 2024, 11:00 am
2 hours 1 minute

Attachment Masterclass: Sue Johnson, Rick Hanson, Julie Mennano, and Elizabeth Ferreira
Why do some people navigate the social world with such ease while others feel like they're swimming upstream? In this special episode of Being Well, Forrest is joined by four leading experts for a masterclass on the science of attachment. Featuring conversations with Dr. Sue Johnson, Dr. Rick Hanson, Julie Mennano, and Elizabeth Ferreira, this carefully curated episode gives you a map to becoming more socially confident, emotionally intelligent, and authentically connected.
Topics include:
- The four fundamental patterns that influence how we show up in every social interaction.
- Dr. Sue Johnson's guide to having deeper, more meaningful "hold me tight" conversations.
- Dr. Rick Hanson’s approach to working with self-abandonment.
- Julie Mennano on working with the anxious-avoidant dance that brings so many couples to therapy.
- Elizabeth Ferreira’s somatic and trauma-informed perspective on healing attachment wounds.
Rick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWB
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
3:35: Rick Hanson: How to become securely attached
31:20: Working with common attachment wounds
47:35: Sue Johnson: How to have a bonding conversation
1:09:35: Julie Mennano: The attachment mistakes that bring people to therapy, and how secure couples relate differently
1:22:25: Rick Hanson: Self-abandonment, anxious attachment, and how to build up a greater sense of self-worth and self-trust
1:40:30: Elizabeth Ferreira: Creating a secure relationship
1:56:50: Recap and outro
About our Guests: Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, researcher, professor, and the founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a widely used and respected approach to couples therapy. She is considered one of the foremost experts in the field of attachment, and has received numerous awards for her contributions to the field of psychotherapy. Dr. Johnson is also the author of seven books, including the best-selling Hold Me Tight.
Elizabeth Ferreira is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist working in California. She specializes in somatic approaches to trauma work.
Julie Menanno a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, and Relationship Coach. She is the founder of The Secure Relationship coaching method, and maintains an instagram of the same name with over 1M followers. She is also the author of Secure Love.
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
23 December 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 20 minutes

Working with Your Parts: Complex PTSD, Dissociation, and Hypervigilance with Elizabeth Ferreira
Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins the show to discuss complex trauma, dissociation, and working with challenging emotions. Forrest and Elizabeth start by exploring the relationship between Internal Family Systems and somatic therapy, including how we can apply a somatic lens to working with our parts. They then apply that framework to complex PTSD, cognitive bypassing, emotional numbing, hypervigilance, and other difficult experiences. Other topics include issues around comparing trauma, windows of tolerance, appreciating individual needs, and Elizabeth’s own journey of becoming a therapist while managing C-PTSD and ADHD.
About our Guest: Elizabeth is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist working in California. She specializes in somatic approaches to trauma work.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:15: What is the crossover between IFS and somatic therapy?
12:25: What helps a psychologically literate person who struggles to have a felt experience?
19:05: How can I track my capacity and needs in social situations before dissociating?
35:05: Why do I feel numb, and how can I move past it and feel my feelings again?
41:05: How can I address hypervigilance and stay present with my feelings without catastrophizing?
48:40: How do I respond to friends (or clients) who minimize their own pain or trauma?
58:55: What has supported Elizabeth in pursuing her vocation amidst challenges with trauma and neurodivergence?
1:10:40: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
16 December 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 21 minutes

Anxious and Avoidant in Relationship: The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic
We all have different needs for closeness and distance, for intimacy and independence. You might have heard terms like anxious or avoidant attachment to describe this, and these tendencies can create challenges - particularly when people with different needs try to relate to each other. In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest explore why we're drawn to people who activate our insecurities, how anxiety manifests differently in "pursuers" versus "distancers," and what we can all do to work with our natural tendencies more skillfully. They discuss common relationship patterns, why pursuers usually receive more blame than distancers, schizoid personalities, and practical ways to break free from entrenched patterns.
Rick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWB
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: Key characteristics of pursuers and distancers
9:25: Demands and reassurance
13:35: Assigning blame, and gender stereotypes
20:40: Why opposites attract, the power of small wins, and changing ourselves
31:15: The distancer
40:45: Finding motivation to identify common ground with our partner
54:30: The pursuer
1:00:00: Self-consciousness and ego
1:02:10: Brave questions to ask in your relationship
1:07:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
9 December 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 17 minutes

Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn
Why does change feel so difficult, even when we desperately want it? Dr. Ross Ellenhorn joins the show to explore our resistance to change, and the many good reasons we might have to stay just as we are. Forrest and Dr. Ellenhorn discuss the “fear of hope,” the allure of sameness, and what actually helps people develop the confidence to make meaningful changes in their lives. Topics include challenging conventional self-help wisdom, existential dread, dealing with disappointment, major issues in social work, psychedelics, and self-compassion.
About our Guest: Ross Ellenhorn is a psychotherapist and sociologist, the owner and CEO of Ellenhorn, a community-integration program offering services for individuals experiencing addictive behaviors or extreme and complex states of mind and mood, and the author of three books including How We Change (and Ten Reasons Why We Don’t).
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:00: How Dr. Ross’s background in social work influences his outlook on change
6:20: What makes people want to stay the same
18:00: Self-efficacy, faith, and making hope big
24:55: Seeing your problems as solutions
30:00: Grappling with existential anxiety
34:20: The shock of recognition, and connecting with motivations through dialog
40:25: Managing disappointment
43:20: Psychosocial rehab, and the changing definition of mental health
52:55: Psychedelics and direct action
1:04:30: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 December 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 11 minutes

Now What? What to Do When Things Fall Apart
Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs: a sudden job loss, a relationship ending, a health crisis, or losing faith in something. These moments can leave us feeling overwhelmed, lost, and unsure of how to move forward. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick explore a practical framework for navigating life's most challenging transitions. They break down the essential steps for finding your footing when things fall apart: managing the initial emotional impact, steadying yourself, gathering information, working with loss, and taking meaningful action.
You'll learn how to process difficult emotions without getting stuck, ways to evaluate your situation objectively while avoiding common cognitive biases, strategies for decision making under stress, and approaches to building resilience and finding meaning in challenging experiences.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
4:55: Four steps to find your footing when things fall apart
7:05: Stabilizing your body, and reestablishing routines
14:45: Slowing down, and confirmation bias
17:30: Emotional first aid, limiting stressors, and rumination
29:45: Identifying what is reliable in your life
32:45: Facing reality, and gathering information
40:00: Processing loss and disappointment
48:00: Making a plan and taking action
52:30: Post-traumatic growth
58:10: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
25 November 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 31 minutes

How to Make Good Choices: A System for Decision Making
We all have to make big choices in life, but it’s easy to feel overwhelmed when facing major decisions about careers, relationships, or personal growth. In this episode, Forrest and Rick Hanson explore how to develop a reliable system for making choices that align with your values and goals. They break down balancing analysis with intuition, the five key decision-making styles, and common obstacles that lead to poor choices. The episode also includes two live demonstrations of working through a big decision, which includes learning how to identify what you want and pursue it from a values-oriented perspective.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
3:50: Analysis vs. intuition, and activities vs. results
10:45: Effort, values, and the environments you put yourself in
17:05: The five decision-making styles
28:50: Motives and attachment
33:30: Rigidity, excessive certainty, and other common pitfalls
42:10: Demo #1 - Reverse-engineering a career decision (or Rick with a legal pad)
1:04:55: Demo #2 - Deciding whether to invest deeply in a romantic relationship
1:18:00: Recap
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
18 November 2024, 11:00 am
1 hour 31 minutes

Healthy Productivity with Cal Newport
We’re tired, burnt out, and searching for a reprieve from hustle culture. Something needs to change if we’re going to get to real productivity: doing that is meaningful and fulfilling rather than just checking boxes off an endless to-do list. On today’s episode, Cal Newport joins the podcast to explore slow productivity, deep work, and how we can achieve more by doing less.
About our Guest: Cal is a computer science professor at Georgetown University and the bestselling author of eight books including Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World and most recently, Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout. He also has a YouTube channel and hosts the podcast Deep Questions with Cal Newport.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:45: Slow productivity vs. pseudoproductivity
10:35: Anxiety, procrastination, and overwhelm
17:40: Meaningful work and anti-productivity
22:40: Technology, anti-capitalist philosophy, and knowledge work
28:55: The cognitive drain of multitasking
32:45: The distraction of phones social media
36:00: The ratio of deep work to lighter work
41:00: How timeblocking actually reduces stress
45:20: Office hours and shared documents
48:05: Common misconceptions about Cal’s work
55:45: Tailoring advice to your individual situation
1:00:40: Life transitions, and the deceptive advice to “follow your passion”
1:08:00: Obsessing over quality while avoiding perfectionism
1:17:30: Recap
Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
Sponsors
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.
Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts.
Get 15% off OneSkin with the code BEINGWELL at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Connect with the show:
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
11 November 2024, 11:00 am
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