ROUGH RIPPED AND READY!!!!!!!!!!!
This week we're diving deeply and darkly into the DTV realm and fishing up a couple of classier than usual gems with legitimate people involved. We kick things off with a discussion of the subtly anger fueled Neo-Noir, Sweet Virginia (2017), featuring a sad, bearded bull riding Jonny Bernthal. Then we head out to Baltic region and fish ourselves up some Polish gangsters in the undercover-snitch/prison crime drama, The Informer (2019), featuring Robocop, Gone Girl, Shoot 'Em Up, Marilyn Monroe and Common!
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Sometimes you go into a movie with hopes and dreams of the magnificently magical treasure box that's about to hopefully be revealed before your eye meats. You see the cast, the plot synopsis and the vintage and you just know you're in for something truly special. And other times you end up with the Brent Huff penned and directed stinkbag, The Bad Pack (1997) starring Robert Davi in a big dumb leather jacket and Confederate soldier cap. Luckily, there are yet other times when you don't have any expectations at all and you end up with something really kinda special. Such is the case with Don Johnson in his cinematic debut, as an unhinged cop on the edge, chasing Neo Nazis across the American heartland in Dead Bang (1989)!
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Real movie fans buy a lot of movies. The REALEST movie fans buy movies they've never even seen. The even REALER REALEST movie fans buy movies they've never seen and often don't watch them for years... Even decades. This week we help to assuage this weighty, watchlist affliction by assisting Jake in ensuring his well earned money has been spent wisely by watching two bangers from his back catalogue. We kick things off with a discussion about a snow suit and social commentary infused, Exploitation/Docu-Drama from Canucklehead land, Gina (1975). Then we throw on our crispiest pair of tighty whities and descened into a nightmare world of gay panic and hairy thighs in the Giallo inspired weirdness of Hanging Heart (1989).
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One big, fat Keanu special. Two big, fat Keanu Meatball Sandwiches. Young Keanu as an action boy in Point Break (1991) and Old Keanu as an action man in John Wick Chapter 4 (2023).
"Gimme 2!"
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This week we salute all the heroes and their various blood types. Rutger Hauer, Vincent D'Onofrio (looking fine as hell), Delroy Lindo, Sean Connery, that pale dude from Queen of the Damned, The Invisible Man, La Femme Nikita, Mr. Hyde's outsized tophat, Stephen Norrington's ego, Captain Nemo's Indian Capoeira skills and a surprising amount of Cum. Literally the whole shebang. We get the dog skull rolling with a chat about a game that makes no sense but nevertheless captivates the endtimes in The Blood of Heroes aka Salute of the Jugger (1989). Then we dive headlong into Victorian era, filigree ensconced hatred with Sean Connery and Stephen Norrington's mutual retirement-driven, early 2000s cash toilet, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
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This week we head out to the European wilds and experience death and destruction as only the Netherlands and Jolly Old England can provide. First, we experience emotional death and destruction in the form of the miserable, Kitchen Sink nightmare, The Black Panther (1997). Then we head to Amsterdam with Dick Maas at the helm and experience the death and destruction of a mute girl's childhood at the hands of The Commish himself, Michael Chiklis in Do Not Disturb (1999).
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The desert is a place where people go to get lost. It's also a place where people go to get found. Then again, it's also a place where dirtbags like to do dumb sh*t while messed up on illicit drugs and maybe start an off the grid colony or something. The point is... wait... what was the point? Oh yeah, this week the movies we're talking about feature deserts. They also feature lots of scenes with dumbsh*ts embarrassing themselves in front of cameras while potentially under the influence. Often while in the desert. First we kick things off with one of the cornballiest cornfests that ever corned in Lee Katzin's doofy post apoc dorkfest, World Gone Wild (1988). Then we take a hit off that good, good nostalgia hooka in the backseat of Ollie Stone's convertible and have a panic attack because he's sweating too much, talking too fast and his face keeps morphing into Tarantino's while blabbering media conspiracies at us in Natural Born Killers (1994). Oh yeah, and we managed to do somewhat of a Tom Sizemore tribute episode a week before his death without even knowing it!
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This week we head back to the mystical land of the orient and discover that, as long suspected, the people of Asia have the highest blood pressure of anyone in the world. We also discover that high school girls are more terrifying than the reanimated corpse of a World War II soldier capable of pulling a man's arm off and caving his skull in with it. We kick things off with a discussion of what may be the bloodiest movie (in gallons) to ever bloody our screens in the newly released South Korean blood bomb, Project Wolf Hunting (2022). Then we suffer a full blown nervous breakdown while watching Koji Yakusho track down his emotionally abusive demon spawn in Tetsuya Nakashima's nihilism bomb, World of Kanako (2019).
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Why can't we escape the early aughts?! BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT TO. This week we mix things up with one of the sleaziest, most confounding teen dramas of the past two decades with the sleaztastic, Elisha Cuthbert produced, incest infused The Quiet (2005). Then we bring "The Demon" back to the show with a heaping helping of dad-ly Rob Van Dam and a side of Big Dave Bautista slappy knife fighting his way through David DeFalco's The Wrong Side of Town.
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It's episode 450! Which means it's time to talk about honor. It's time to talk about brotherhood. It's time to talk about Heroes. Bloodshed. It's time to talk about cool sunglasses. Trenchcoats. The plausability of smoking while also holding a toothpick in one's mouth. Dealing with trauma by way of the food triangle. Whether or not it's a good idea to wear all white to a precarious criminal exchange. And most importantly, the concept of rice being the embodiment of one's father AND mother all at once. It's time to talk about John Woo's bro-therly duology, A Better Tomorrow I (1986) and A Better Tomorrow II (1987). Happy 450!
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