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The Relationship School Podcast

Jayson Gaddis

with Jayson Gaddis

  • 38 minutes 19 seconds
    Advice for Couples, Therapists and Coaches - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 497

    Are you attending couples therapy but feeling like you're not making progress? Jayson and Ellen delve into why couples often find themselves spinning their wheels and offer insights on how to propel your relationship forward if you're feeling stuck. They also tackle the issue of spiritual bypassing, emphasizing that true letting go is a gradual process.

    Timestamps:

    • 2:01 - Couples not making progress
    • 7:36 - Doing the work
    • 22:28 - Overly spiritual couples

    Links:

    30 April 2024, 11:00 am
  • 1 hour 2 minutes
    Polyamory vs Monogamy - Irka & Eugene - 496

    Irka and Eugene join Jayson to talk non-monogamy. Is monogamy inherently restrictive? Do people in polyamorous relationships have boundaries? Is non-hierarchical polyamory possible? What role does sexual exploration play in a polyamorous relationship? Is non-monogamy for you? Whether you’re monogamous or not, you’ll find plenty of wisdom in this insightful conversation.

    Timestamps:

    • 8:45 - Definitions and terms
    • 11:40 - Boundaries
    • 19:52 - Thirds
    • 34:09 - Is monogamy inherently restrictive?
    • 37:39 - Sexual exploration
    • 42:27 - Is non-monogamy for you?
    • 51:03 - Communication
    • 53:51 - Advice for high school kids
    • 57:45 - Links
    • 59:15 - Action step

    Links:

    23 April 2024, 11:00 am
  • 53 minutes 36 seconds
    28 Years Strong Even After Affairs - Satyen and Suzanne Raja - 495

    In this podcast, I interview Satyen and Suzanne, both long-time students of David Deida. These two are super honest, loving individuals, and wow have they been through a lot! There share some very vulnerable details about how they navigated religion, affairs, and fighting. They give you concrete practical tools you can try right now with your partner. These guys live it!

    SHOWNOTES

    • How did Satyen and Suzanne start caring about relationships? [4:27]
    • Why did Satyen resist marriage? [7:00]
    • What ingredient was the “it” factor for Suzanne’s attraction to Satyen? [7:44]
    • What role did religion play in their relationship? [10:42]
    • How did fighting about food bring them closer? [12:15]
    • What impact did David Deida have on their connection? [14:28]
    • How did they create a new template for their relationship? [16:06]
    • The most challenging period of their relationship [18:02]
    • One really important practice to heal from infidelity [20:15]
    • Satyen and Suzanne demonstrate a powerful tool to express emotional pain to your partner [26:30]
    • The often-missed key to understanding your partner [32:43]
    • What is PCP and ISE and how do they create connection and turn-on? [34:50]

    Links:

     

    Satyen and Suzanne are the authorities on relationship – passionately intwined for twenty-seven years and sought after by people over the the world for their powerful and cutting edge trainings. With over two decades of study, teaching and facilitation in this area, they have taught tens of thousands of singles and couples the art of creating passionate, juicy intimacy that lasts a lifetime.

    A living demonstration of a couple who are continually re-igniting their spark, passion and love, Satyen and Suzanne practically distill what for many can be a confusing, frustrating and even painful topic down to its very workable, irresistible essence. Whether on radio, tv or in auditoriums of thousands, their style is provocative, inspiring, and above all, full of practical wisdom. They have a unique gift for hearing what lies beneath your questions, and giving you answers that convey deep truths with incredible heart. Never shy of controversy, they are willing to take conventional wisdom to task where it falls short in order to help you learn and live the most effective relationship skills.

    Satyen and Suzanne are committed to, and superlatively skilled at, saying the things that no one else says, going places that no one else goes — so that you can have the hot, deep, loving, passionate relationship that you deserve…starting now!

    http://acceleratedevolutionacademy.com

    16 April 2024, 11:00 am
  • 23 minutes 26 seconds
    My Take on Andrew Huberman and His Relationship Issues - Jayson Gaddis - 494

    Jayson shares his thoughts on the controversy surrounding popular podcaster Andrew Huberman. What can we learn about ourselves and our relationships from the online reaction to the recent revelations about Andrew Huberman? What are you projecting onto the authority figures in your life? Are you putting people in your life on a pedestal, and how will you react when they inevitably fail you?

    Timestamps:

    • 2:17 - What can we learn from the Andrew Huberman situation?
    • 5:24 - Pedestal to pit
    • 13:55 - Are you projecting on to authority figures?

    Links:

    9 April 2024, 11:00 am
  • 27 minutes 36 seconds
    The Purpose of Relationship Pain - Jayson Gaddis - 493

    Relationship pain has a very clear purpose. If you are hip to it, you’ll thrive in relationships. If you are uneducated here, you’ll run away and play the victim. Direct and to the point, I suggest a very important daily practice for you to strengthen your mindset about long-term partnership. Pain hurts indeed. And, what if pain was your ally in disguise?

     

    Relationship Pain Daily Practice

    I have two choices with my relationship pain:

    1. Use it to make me weaker by whining, complaining, and blaming others (or myself). 2. Use it to make me stronger by seeing it as my ally to master the lesson it’s bringing me.

    It’s 100% of the time up to me to choose.

    Timestamps:

    • 3:15 - Two choices when it comes to relationship pain
    • 9:32 - The first thing to NOT do when in relationship pain
    • 13:40 - The good news about pain and stress
    • 19:40 - The link between your emotional pain and your numbing habits
    • 24:37 - Action step

    Links:

    2 April 2024, 11:00 am
  • 1 hour 4 minutes
    Dan Savage On Being Monogamish - Dan Savage - 492

    Are you simply defaulting to monogamy?

    Have you ever genuinely asked yourself, "Would a different sexual model work better for me?"

    Dan Savage, an author, sex-advice columnist, podcaster, and public speaker, suggests that we should all regularly pose these questions to ourselves. Dan and his husband have chosen what they call a "monogamish" relationship. They've acknowledged that it's impossible to fulfill all of your partner's needs, and that's a message from which we can all learn.

    While we typically focus on monogamous long-term relationships, in this episode, we'll explore how various types of relationships can be successful. Tune in and prepare for some introspection into your own sexual expression.

    Timestamps:

    • 5:00 - What does monogamish mean?
    • 11:27 - Eroticism in a long-term relationship
    • 17:24 - Bringing in a third
    • 23:37 - Monogamy as the default setting
    • 31:00 - Changing broken marraige norms
    • 33:50 - Dan's relationship journey
    • 46:49 - Allowing for erotic autonomy
    • 53:57 - Dan's advice for young people
    • 59:00 - Action step

    Links:

    26 March 2024, 11:00 am
  • 29 minutes 38 seconds
    Conflict, Communication, Fixing, Problem Solving - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 491

    Jayson and Ellen discuss conflict, communication, and problem-solving versus understanding. What's the issue with being a conflict-avoidant couple? When is it appropriate to problem-solve and offer advice to a long-term partner? Can excessive understanding become problematic? Tune in to hear Ellen and Jayson offer a few simple strategies that you can use to resolve your communication issues.

    Timestamps:

    • 1:51 - Avoiding Conflict
    • 11:21 - Solving communication problems
    • 17:04 - Problem solving vs understanding
    • 20:28 - The conflict-repair cycle
    • 22:31 - Taking action vs understanding

    Links:

    19 March 2024, 11:00 am
  • 1 hour 15 minutes
    Couples Coaching: Anya & Bodhi Part 2 - Jayson Gaddis - #490

    Jayson coaches the couple, Anya and Bodhi. The last time this couple appeared on the podcast was in episode #364 when they were in the midst of deciding whether to stay together or break up. Since their last appearance, they have grown into a strong and stable couple. In this episode, they discuss the turning point in their relationship that led to them staying together. They also work through current tensions in their relationship related to conflicting schedules and navigating a small living space. You won’t want to miss this insightful conversation.

    Timestamps:

    • 5:17 - Anya & Bodhi's turning point
    • 13:23 - Individual growth
    • 20:00 - Getting to the root of relationship tension
    • 33:34 - Feeling trapped by a lack of connectedness
    • 39:05 - Spontaneity vs. responsibility
    • 43:00 - Different schedules
    • 47:00 - Helping your partner feel less judged
    • 1:00:30 - Being true to yourself vs. being considerate
    • 1:08:59 - Action step

    Links:

    12 March 2024, 11:00 am
  • 28 minutes 29 seconds
    Teen Talk: An Intimate Conversation With My Son - Jayson & Lucian Gaddis - 489

    Jayson is joined by his son Lucian for a conversation about the unique challenges of being a teenager in high school. What are the challenges of being from a relationally focused family? What kinds of stereotypes do teens face? Why do so many parents over-parent their kids? You won’t want to miss this candid father-son conversation.

    Timestamps:

    • 3:52 - Boys in high school
    • 5:28 - Social media apps
    • 6:19 - Waldorf vs. public high school
    • 9:21 - The relational family experiance
    • 16:41 - Challenges high school kids face
    • 20:25 - Over-parenting
    • 23:41 - How to get teenagers involved

    Links:

    5 March 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 37 minutes 9 seconds
    The Trap of Falling in Love - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 488

    Is it possible to truly love someone while you’re still infatuated with them? In this episode, Jayson and Ellen talk about the trap of falling in love and why it’s important to learn to live with the reality of who your partner actually is instead of projecting your fantasies onto them. How can you make your partner your priority every day? What should your relationship boundaries be? It’s time to take a deep dive into the world of love after infatuation.

    Timestamps:

    • 2:16 - Infatuation vs. love
    • 6:16 - Reality vs. fantasy
    • 20:00 - Accepting people for who they are
    • 24:48 - Know your relationship boundaries
    • 28:16 - Love after infatuation
    • 31:52 - Our impact on others

    Links:

     

    27 February 2024, 12:00 pm
  • 22 minutes 8 seconds
    Dealing with Division and Getting Unstuck - Jayson Gaddis - 487

    Jayson talks about dealing with division in the world, digital minimalism and getting unstuck in your relationship. Can solving division in the home help make the world a better place? How do you know when you’re stuck as a couple? What should you do if you’re stuck? Would you like to be the next guest on The Relationship School Podcast? Listen in to find out more!

    Timestamps:

    • 4:01 - Couples, how do you know when you're stuck?
    • 11:47 - Dealing with division
    • 19:25 - Action steps

    Links:

    20 February 2024, 12:00 pm
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