The Relationship School Podcast

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The Relationship School Podcast

Jayson Gaddis

with Jayson Gaddis

32 minutes 52 seconds

Coaching Someone Whose Partner Isn’t Doing the Work - Jayson Gaddis - 535
How should you coach someone whose partner isn’t doing the work? Jayson breaks it down. How should coaches and therapists get their clients to focus on themselves? Should clients leave or stay with an impossible person? Why is it so important for clients to have their feelings validated? How can you help your clients take responsibility for not speaking up? Don’t miss this insightful look at a difficult situation.
Timestamps:
- 1:18 - Coaching someone whose partner isn’t doing the work
- 4:47 - Getting clients to focus on themselves
- 8:47 - Staying with an impossible person
- 10:35 - Leaving an impossible person
- 15:00 - You need to have your feelings validated
- 20:35 - Helping clients feel the sharp edge of the knife
- 24:00 - Why do clients get defensive about the partner they’re criticizing?
- 25:00 - Coaching your client to ask their partner to change
- 31:21 - Helping your clients take responsibility for not speaking up
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
16 July 2025, 9:57 pm
1 hour 11 minutes

Psychedelics: Revolutionary Healing Tool or a Spiritual Bypass? - Dr. Will Van Derveer - 534
Dr. Will Van Derveer joins Jayson to discuss the uses and misuses of psychedelic drugs. He shares his background, his work in integrative psychiatry, and the limitations of conventional mental health treatments. Dr. Van Derveer also explores the therapeutic potential of ketamine, MDMA, LSD, psilocybin, and more.
Are there people who shouldn’t use psychedelics? If you’re going to use them, what are some best practices? Don’t miss this enlightening episode.
Will Van Derveer, MD is a leader in the adoption of integrative psychiatry practices globally. After discovering that his conventional psychiatric training was inadequate to answer many of the challenges facing his patients, Dr. Van Derveer began to learn how to resolve the root causes of common psychiatric problems such as depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Dr. Van Derveer has published research on MDMA-assisted psychotherapy for PTSD and written book chapters in the fields of ketamine-assisted psychotherapy and other clinical applications of psychedelic compounds. His passion is finding effective relief from psychological suffering using a vast array of the most natural approaches possible. In addition to traditional medical training, He is a meditation instructor and has trained in shamanism, EMDR, somatic experiencing, internal family systems, cognitive behavioral therapy, and hypnosis.
Timestamps:
- 1:09 - Will's journey
- 3:24 - Limitations of conventional mental health treatments
- 14:56 - Will's journey with psychedelics
- 22:16 - Ketamine
- 27:08 - MDMA
- 31:09 - Other psychedelics
- 42:20 - Jayson's experiance with psychedelics
- 46:02 - Problems in the psychedelics scene
- 57:02 - Psychedelics as part of a long-term treatment plan
- 1:00:00 - Who does NOT benefit from psychedelics?
- 1:04:00 - Tips for using psychedelics
- 1:07:00 - Where to find Will
Links:
- Will's Instagram
- Will's X
- ⁠Relationship Coach Training⁠
- Follow Jayson on social media:
8 July 2025, 11:00 am
21 minutes 5 seconds

The Victim Triangle - Jayson Gaddis - 533
Are you stuck in victimhood? Jayson breaks down how to invert the victim triangle and make the shift from victim to author. What’s the difference between blame and responsibility? Is being in the victim seat always a bad thing? Stay tuned until the end when Jayson shares one important question you should always ask your clients - and yourself.
Timestamps:
- 0:55 - The victim/drama triangle
- 5:08 - The difference between blame and responsibility
- 6:58 - Getting out of the victim seat
- 8:31 - Inverting the victim triangle
- 15:00 - Making the journey from victim to author
- 18:15 - One challenging question
Links:
- Relationship Coach Training
- Follow Jayson on social media:
1 July 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 10 minutes

Evolved Coaching with Navy Seal Mark Divine PhD - 532
What if today were your last day on Earth? Jayson is joined by author and retired Navy SEAL Commander Mark Divine for his 3rd time on the show to discuss finding your purpose on this planet, meditation vs. psychedelics, developing mental and physical toughness, and much more. Don’t miss Mark’s exhortation for coaches at the end.
Mark Divine is a retired Navy SEAL, bestselling author, and transformative thought leader, inspiring compassion, resilience, and fortitude. His distinguished military career spanned two decades with tours in Iraq, the Middle East, and the Korean Peninsula, culminating in his retirement in as a Commander. Beyond the battlefield, Mark founded SEALFIT, where he blends Navy SEAL training with innovative mental toughness and mindfulness techniques. Through the Unbeatable Mind program he has trained thousands in his "Kokoro" whole mind system, and through the Mark Divine Courage Foundation, he aids veterans seeking post-traumatic growth. Mark holds a PhD in Global Leadership from Pepperdine University and resides in Encinitas, California, with his wife, Sandy, and Husky Mahina.
Timestamps:
- 5:15 - Horizontal vs. vertical development
- 13:04 - The importance of training your body
- 19:06 - You are not your thoughts
- 24:08 - Vertical development takes time
- 29:24 - What are you on this planet for?
- 37:39 - Don’t feed the fear wolf
- 41:05 - Meditation vs psychedelics
- 45:33 - What if today is your last day?
- 48:48 - Why coaches need to be doing the work
- 56:53 - AI in coaching
Links:
- Mark Divine – Navy SEAL Speaker, Author, Founder of Unbeatable Mind
- Follow Jayson on social media:
24 June 2025, 11:00 am
28 minutes 44 seconds

Signs It’s Time to Fire Your Therapist or Coach - Jayson Gaddis - 531
Is it time to fire your coach or therapist? Jayson breaks it down. Do the sessions you attend feel more like coffee dates? Is your trauma going unaddressed? Have you been seeing a practitioner for years without making real progress? If you're struggling to see results, you won’t want to miss this episode.
Timestamps:
- 5:26 - Your story isn’t being challenged
- 6:35 - Sessions feel like a coffee date
- 7:36 - Therapy feels like a friendship
- 8:56 - Trauma isn’t being addressed
- 11:31 - No change is happening
- 13:13 - Uncritically siding with your story
- 15:20 - The asks are too challenging
- 17:26 - You’re not doing your homework
- 21:19 - Final thoughts
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
17 June 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 7 minutes

Coaching Reframes and Context with Master Coach John O’Connor
What does it mean to follow your deepest calling? How do you get clear on what actually matters and act on it today? Jayson sits down with executive coach John O’Connor to explore what it takes to create real transformation.
They get into symbolic sovereignty, creating a clear vision, and how deep callings can emerge from deep traumas. Jayson shares what it means to earn your black belt in relationships, they discuss why music is a powerful metaphor for life, and the one skill every facilitator needs. They also talk about entanglement, and having a shared vision with your partner. Stick around for grounded insights on leadership, connection, and showing up fully to the work only you can do.
John O’Connor is an executive coach and facilitator living in Boulder, Colorado. For more than a decade, John has coached the top CEOs and leaders in hedge funds, startups, and Fortune 500 companies. John embodies a masterful level of skill to create radical transformation. His coaching path emerged out of 17 years as a massage therapist, after working through tens of thousands of bodies, he developed a deep connection and curiosity to the unconscious mind, learning how to facilitate behavioral, emotional and mental change at the deepest level. John was a co-lead facilitator at the first two Open Source Retreats that helped lay the foundation for the EVRYMAN movement. He is also a certified NLP and hypnosis trainer, a certified master coach, creator of The Access Method, and author of the upcoming book From Ordinary to Extraordinary.
Timestamps:
- 1:23 - What is your deepest calling?
- 3:49 - Stepping out of time
- 8:54 - Creating a clear vision
- 10:43 - What are the three most important things you need to do today?
- 13:19 - Symbolic sovereignty
- 32:24 - How to get your black belt in relationships
- 37:36 - Music as a metaphor for relationships
- 45:48 - Having a shared vision
- 52:42 - Deep callings can emerge from deep traumas
- 58:56 - Dealing with entanglement
- 1:04:00 - An important skill for facilitators and coaches
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
10 June 2025, 11:00 am
23 minutes 45 seconds

The Core Inner Conflict
Jayson breaks down the problems with one common strategy—people-pleasing and how it relates to the core inner conflict. What are the childhood roots of people-pleasing? Why do people-pleasers become resentful? Why do integrated individuals make better coaches and therapists? Tune in to this insightful episode to learn how to stop betraying yourself in the context of your relationship.
Timestamps:
- 1:37 - Client example
- 5:43 - The childhood roots of people-pleasing
- 12:04 - Betraying yourself to fit in
- 14:46 - Why people-pleasers become resentful
- 18:23 - Why integrated people make better coaches and therapists
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
3 June 2025, 11:00 am
1 hour 18 minutes

50 Years As A Therapist- Sage Advice for All Coaches & Therapists - Duane Mullner - 528
Jayson sits down with Duane Mullner to talk about the role of the therapist or coach. Why is the here and now so important? Can clients help their coaches and therapists? How should you prepare for a session? What should you do with a client who isn’t making progress? How can you help clients who are stuck in victimhood? Don’t miss this chance to hear Duane Mullner share the wisdom he has accumulated over his long career.
Timestamps:
- 6:44 - What is the role of the therapist/coach
- 15:30 - What’s going on between therapist and client?
- 20:31 - Why is the here and now so important?
- 27:39 - Don’t make resistance wrong
- 34:35 - How clients help coaches and therapists
- 41:46 - How to prepare for a session
- 44:51 - Making progress with clients
- 54:18 - How to help people who are in their victimhood
- 1:07:00 - Should you trust clients to treat you about their problems?
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
27 May 2025, 11:00 am
19 minutes 5 seconds

Coaching Yourself with AI - Jayson Gaddis - 527
Jayson breaks down how to coach yourself using AI and shares a variety of example prompts. Can AI offer constructive criticism? What can it do with astrology and Gene Keys? Can it give you a tough-love wake-up call? Stick around until the end to learn how you can use AI to get the most out of your therapy sessions!

Timestamps:
- 2:40 - Ways to use AI as a client
- 4:52 - Using AI for constructive criticism
- 7:50 - Astrology
- 10:27 - Tough love
- 13:36 - Getting the most out of therapy
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
20 May 2025, 11:00 am
33 minutes 53 seconds

Will AI Replace Coaches and Therapists? Jayson Gaddis - 526
Jayson discusses the role of AI in the therapy and coaching space. Will AI replace therapists and coaches? Can it ever be better than a real coach or therapist? What are the downsides of using AI to coach yourself? Stay tuned until the end of the episode to find out how you can thrive—rather than just survive—as a coach or therapist in the age of AI.

Timestamps:
- 5:42 - Price point
- 9:10 - Who will lose their jobs?
- 12:53 - What AI can't replace
- 19:24 - AI and intuition
- 23:47 - How should coaches and therapists adapt to AI?
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
13 May 2025, 11:00 am
17 minutes 45 seconds

User Error- How to Be a Great Client - Jayson Gaddis - 525
If you want to get the most out of therapy or coaching, it’s important to know how to be a great client. In this episode, Jayson shares his experience of being a client and breaks down how you can make sure you’re getting the results you want. Is it ever okay not to make progress? Learn how to advocate for yourself, prepare for your sessions, stay accountable to friends and family, and much more in this episode!
Timestamps:
- 1:40 - Is it okay not to make progress?
- 4:01 - Jayson's story
- 8:51 - How to be a good client
- 15:53 - When to have a frank conversation with your coach or therapist
Links:
- Follow Jayson on social media:
6 May 2025, 11:00 am
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