🗡️If at first you don't succeed, die, die again.

Ian's had a hard life. That life gets even more difficult when he falls in love with a woman who is (not-so-secretly) a deer. And who makes him eat her earwax.

😈 The Creature: The Charles Mill Lake Monster

This week, the state of Ohio flexes its greatest (super)natural resource: quirky cryptids.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age.

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Disclaimer: https://myths.link/441
Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://myths.link/source
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Quince: Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to https://quince.com/legends. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too.

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box PLUS free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends

Vinted: Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep everything you earn.

Mint Mobile: To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to https://mintmobile.com/legends.

---

🎵 Music Credits

Salmony by Blue Dot Sessions
Another Love Song from the Corner by Breakmaster Cylinder
8Bit Sadventure Time by Breakmaster Cylinder
Nightwatch Beetles by Breakmaster Cylinder
Sadly Here We Are Again by Breakmaster Cylinder
Lessita by Blue Dot Sessions

🐒 Sun Wukong, the Monkey King, knows a demon shakedown when he sees it.

And what's happening in this town, where people need to pay upwards of $30k (in 2026 USD) a year to a Buddha they never see? That's a shakedown. Does his master, the Tang Monk, believe him? Of course he doesn't.

😈 The Creature: Man-dragon

Hey, just because man-dragon knows something bad is about to happen and shows up there ahead of time doesn't mean he's obligated to tell you the bad thing that's going to happen.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age.

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Don't let stigma stand in the way of support. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths

Wayfair: Ready to upgrade your home for way less? Head to https://wayfair.com right now to shop all things home and get your space ready for less.

---

🎵 Music Credits

A Peaceful Plummet by Breakmaster Cylinder
Spheres of Doom by Breakmaster Cylinder
Damn Yea, Shebeasts! by Breakmaster Cylinder
Dislotec - Pitbull by Breakmaster Cylinder
Embers Bounce Around You on the Way Downward by Breakmaster Cylinder
Elmore Heights by Blue Dot Sessions

✏️Gaṅgâdhara's astrologer dad has some bad news for his boy: he's going to die.

Well, first he'll spend a decade in prison, and then die. Then things will get better? It's the story of the Soothsayer's Son.

😈 The Creature: Denpachi Kitsune

Are you sure the best student in your school isn't a secret monster? Really? Ok, then, it's probably just Denpachi.

---

🎉 The Giveaway!

From now until July 24th, 2026, Our awesome publisher is giving away 15 early copies of For the King, book one of Myths and Legends's comprehensive version of the King Arthur legends. The winners of the giveaway can read their very own free physical copy months before it even goes on sale! Enter to win here: https://myths.link/giveaway

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age. 

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/37002/pg37002-images.html#ch3
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box plus free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends

BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Don't let stigma stand in the way of support. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths

Quince: Elevate your summer wardrobe. Head to https://quince.com/legends for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Mint Mobile: To get your new wireless plan for just $15 a month, go to https://mintmobile.com/legends.

---

🎵 Music Credits

India Melody by Breakmaster Cylinder
Lovin You is Easy Cause You're Chewable by Breakmaster Cylinder
Time's Arrow by Breakmaster Cylinder
On a Straight Down Train Car by Breakmaster Cylinder
Etude 1 Cherub by Breakmaster Cylinder
Izeah by Blue Dot Sessions

🏝️No one has seen or heard about Maui for quite some time

Meanwhile, all these strange portents are leading disparate groups to a faraway island, all the while there are ominous tales spoken in whispers. It's probably ok, right? I mean, it's Maui. He's always looking out for us.

Right?

😈 The Creature: Menehune

They'll build things for you (out of love), or they'll shoot you (also out of love?) but you better not watch them do either.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age.

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Disclaimer: https://myths.link/438
Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Mint Mobile: To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to https://mintmobile.com/legends.

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box plus free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends

---

🎵 Music Credits

Woke up at the Aquarium by Breakmaster Cylinder
Bitter Bit by Blue Dot Sessions
Runway 12 by Blue Dot Sessions
Depths of Field Retreating by Blue Dot Sessions
Pelly's Overture by Blue Dot Sessions
A Aecollection by Blue Dot Sessions

🍼 If your parent goes through the trouble of getting you superpowers...

Kind of the least you can do is get them a new house. And fight all the dragons infesting that house. And get their increasingly specific and dangerous medical treatments for their very real and not made-up illnesses.

😈 The Creature: Sisimito

I did not know the Soviets had a secret program to create Chimpanzee-human hybrid. That's almost unrelated to the Sisimito. Almost.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age. 

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://myths.link/victorious
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

BetterHelp: You don’t have to say yes to everything this summer. Find support in therapy. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths

Mint Mobile: To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to https://mintmobile.com/legends.

Wayfair: Patio season is here and these deals won’t last! head to https://wayfair.com right now to get your outdoor space ready for way less.

---

🎵 Music Credits

this is where I leave you by Breakmaster Cylinder
snails attack! by Breakmaster Cylinder
An Egg-Shaped Room For Your Thoughts by Breakmaster Cylinder
Building Blocks B by Breakmaster Cylinder
Our Names Engraved by Blue Dot Sessions

🪱Mr. Worm is getting married! That (not creepy) stranger is looking in your windows! Shin is driving tired!

Five interconnected stories from Korean folklore about letting people know the real you. And 

😈 The Creature: Duergar

If you're at risk of being beaten up by the Duergar, no offense, but you're probably already breaking several rules of the Myths and Legends podcast

---

🎉 The Giveaway!

From now through June 14th, 2026, Our awesome publisher is giving away 35 early copies of For the King, book one of Myths and Legends's comprehensive version of the King Arthur legends. The winners of the giveaway can read their very own free physical copy months before it even goes on sale! Enter to win here: https://myths.link/giveaway2

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age. 

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box plus free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends

Quince: Elevate your summer wardrobe. Head to https://quince.com/legends for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Storyworth: Father's Day is Sunday, June 21st. Order right and save up to $20 at https://storyworth.com/legends. 

---

🎵 Music Credits

A Dolphin Most Serious by Breakmaster Cylinder
Beef Strokinoff by Breakmaster Cylinder
Catbus Catbus Where You Been by Breakmaster Cylinder
Big Stupid Wolly, PI by Breakmaster Cylinder
A Pathetic Moment by Blue Dot Sessions
Genesis Valley by Blue Dot Sessions
Gilded Frames by Blue Dot Sessions

⚔️Sir Graelent is too beautiful for his scruples

At least that's what the queen thinks. Good thing she doesn't have the power to wreck his whole life if he doesn't love her. Oh, wait...

😈 The Creature: The Witkəś

Sick bears eating dirt means you have to get your gunpowder boat, scarecrow, and slow stump wick. That sentence will make sense if you listen to the creature of the week.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age.

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Disclaimer: https://myths.link/435
Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://myths.link/graelent
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social:

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Mint Mobile: If you like your money, Mint Mobile is for you. Shop plans at https://mintmobile.com/legends

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box PLUS free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends.

BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. You don’t have to be on this journey alone. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths.

---

🎵 Music Credits

Rumoi Line by Blue Dot Sessions
Cupcake Marshall by Blue Dot Sessions
Invention #1 by Breakmaster Cylinder
Inspector F by Blue Dot Sessions
Alright but Here's the Problem by Breakmaster Cylinder

🐐 Who knew packing so many epic Norse heroes into a single house could have such disastrous consequences?

Not Odin, that's for sure. There's trouble brewing in Valhalla, and there's only one man who knows how to solve it: Skíði, the smartest famous man of our world, Midgard. But, has the world of Midgard changed too much since Odin last looked in on it?

😈 The Creature: Lusca

If you see octopus hands feeling around your boat, you better not toss that empty plastic bottle into the ocean. Probably don't do that anyway, actually. Littering is gross.

🎉 The Giveaway!

From now until May 5, 2026, Our awesome publisher is giving away 35 early copies of For the King, book one of Myths and Legends's comprehensive version of the King Arthur legends. The winners of the giveaway can read their very own free physical copy months before it even goes on sale! Enter to win here: https://myths.link/giveaway

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! FOR THE KING is a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend, focused on humanity and written for the modern age.

If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.  Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Disclaimer: https://myths.link/num
Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Storyworth: Mother's Day is Sunday, May 10th. Order right and save up to $20 at https://storyworth.com/legends.

ButcherBox: As an exclusive offer, new listeners can get their choice between free sirloin tips, ground beef or chicken wings in every box for life, PLUS $20 off when you go to https://ButcherBox.com/legends

BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. You don’t have to be on this journey alone. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths.

Quince: Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to https://quince.com/legends for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.
---

🎵 Music Credits

World 7 - Clouds by Breakmaster Cylinder
World 4 - Trees by Breakmaster Cylinder
Possibility Portals by Breakmaster Cylinder
CarreBarre by Blue Dot Sessions
Only Lara by Chad Crouch

⛰️When the unthinkable happens, Doña must become something she doesn't even recognize to bring justice

But, once she travels so far from herself, can she find her way home? This is the story of Doña Josefa Ramirez y Marmolejo.

😈 The Creature: Sheepsquatch

Basically a Wampa from Star Wars that lives in West Virginia.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! Written by Carissa, it's a definitive version of the King Arthur legends.
If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.
Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://myths.link/dona
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

GhostBed: Right now, listeners of Myths and Legends can take an extra 10% off already-reduced prices. Just go to https://GhostBed.com/legends and use promo code LEGENDS at checkout.

BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths.

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box PLUS free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends.

Mint Mobile: If you like your money, Mint Mobile is for you. Shop plans at https://mintmobile.com/legends

---

🎵 Music Credits

Another Love Song from the Corner by Breakmaster Cylinder
The Sky Darkens by Breakmaster Cylinder
Trent Reznor Dons His Cape and Celebrates Another Birthday by Breakmaster Cylinder
Falling In Place by Breakmaster Cylinder
Slow Piano Pasta by Breakmaster Cylinder
Finn's Valley by Blue Dot Sessions

🍜Samurai Pirates, Stabby Sumo Wrestlers, and Punchable Oni

Are the consequences of Jiuyemon's actions. 

We all make mistakes. Too many of the samurai Jiuyemon's mistakes involved killing people with a sword while drunk, though. While the heat dies down, he needs to start a new life in exile. As a toothpaste salesman.

😈 The Creature: Kappa

Famous for being cute and giving boat rides in Animal Crossing! Don't ask about what he used to get up to before he was a kawaii manga star, though! It definitely doesn't involve eating humans and having multiple anuses!

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! Written by Carissa, it's a definitive version of the King Arthur legends.
If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.
Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Disclaimer: https://myths.link/432
Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source: https://myths.link/source
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

ButcherBox: As an exclusive offer, new listeners can get their choice between chicken breast or top sirloin for a year, OR ground beef for life, PLUS $20 off when you go to https://ButcherBox.com/LEGENDS

Home Chef: For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping for your first box PLUS free dessert for life! Go to https://homechef.com/legends. 

GhostBed: Right now, listeners of Myths and Legends can take an extra 10% off already-reduced prices. Just go to https://GhostBed.com/legends and use promo code LEGENDS at checkout.

Quince: Go to https://quince.com/legends for free shipping and 365-day returns. That's a full year to wear it and love it, and you totally will.
---

🎵 Music Credits

Gibbian by Blue Dot Sessions
Marking the Clock by Blue Dot Sessions
Spiro's Etude by Blue Dot Sessions
Illa Villardo by Blue Dot Sessions
Ghosts, Yo by Breakmaster Cylinder
Ice Cream Truck EDMR by Breakmaster Cylinder
Writer's Retreat by Blue Dot Sessions

✨Cobbler Ahmet just wants to fix shoes✨

But his wife wants those sweet, sweet bath reservations, so it looks like he's going to go be the Chief Astrologer to the Sultan. The only problem(s)? He doesn't like astrology, doesn't know how to do it, and starts out by selling his astrology by the side of the highway.

That's actually the second story, because this week there are two stories of two Ahmets following dreams. On the first is junkman Ahmet, who has the same wonderful dream every night...except when it stops being wonderful, and starts getting real, he learns that sometimes following your dreams can be painful. And also weird.

😈 The Creature: Wapaloosie

If you find you're always misplacing your gloves, they might be actively crawling away from you...because they're made from the fur of a Wapaloosie, a half squirrel, half dachshund, half caterpillar.

---

📖 The Book!

Myths and Legends has our first book coming out on December 1st! Written by Carissa, it's a comprehensive retelling of Arthurian legend for the modern age.
If you like the podcast, you'll love the book, and preorders are a massive help to us.
Check it out here: https://myths.link/preorder

🔗 Links:

Membership: https://www.mythpodcast.com/membership
Source 1: https://myths.link/junkman
Source 2: https://myths.link/astrologer
Myths and Legends YouTube:https://myths.link/youtube

💬 Social

Discord: https://myths.link/discord
Instagram: https://myths.link/instagram
Bluesky: https://myths.link/bluesky

---

📢 Sponsors

Better Help: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/myths

ButcherBox: As an exclusive offer, new listeners can get their choice between chicken breast or top sirloin for a year OR ground beef for life, PLUS $20 off when you go to https://ButcherBox.com/LEGENDS

Wayfair: Get organized, refreshed, and back on track this new year for WAY less. Head to https://wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.

---

🎵 Music Credits

Greylock by Blue Dot Sessions
Filesharer's Lament by Chad Crouch
Cello Pizz by Breakmaster Cylinder
Rhodes by Blue Dot Sessions
Julmust by Breakmaster Cylinder
Dream Abridged by Blue Dot Sessions
Corkscrew Pt. 2, Score 19 by Chad Crouch