This week we're tackling a question about sneaky hierarchy, aka sneakiarchy. We're talking about how to recognize it in future relationships, how to recognize when you might be creating it by accident, and more.

If you want your question answered on a future Q&A episode, consider becoming a member of our Patreon community! Visit www.multiamory.com/join to sign up.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about love languages, and taking a critical look at them to discuss whether or not they're actually as important as we make them out to be. We're going to go over some of the key assumptions behind the love languages and of course, look at what the research has to say. And finally, we discuss both the potential benefits and the possible pitfalls of relying too heavily on the love languages as a framework.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY

Get 20% off your first order of the world's smartest cat litter at prettylitter.com/multiamory with promo code MULTIAMORY


This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/multi and get 10% off your first month.


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's Q&A episode is discussing couples' privilege and how to be cognizant of when it may affect interactions with other potential partners.

If you want to submit a question to be answered on one of the extra Q&A episodes we're doing for the next few months, become one of our Patreon supporters at www.patreon.com/multiamory.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today, we're talking about feeling possessive over a partner, the psychology and science behind it, and how even when non-monogamous, possessive feelings can still arise and create challenges for us. We'll even be discussing some times when a little bit of possessiveness can be a good thing!

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Treat yourself to some stories to turn you on or help you drift off to sleep with an extended 30-day free trial at DipseaStories.com/multi

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY

Get a personalized original song and put it on Spotify for free at our special link Songfinch.com/multiamory


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's question from our Patreon supporters is discussing initiating sex, foreplay, and mismatched communications.

If you want to submit a question to be answered on one of the extra Q&A episodes we're doing for the next few months, become one of our Patreon supporters at www.patreon.com/multiamory.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nobody LIKES feeling uncomfortable...but today we're going to be looking at a few ways we sometimes avoid discomfort that may be making the problem worse instead of better. We're taking a good hard look at the emotions a lot of us prefer to avoid, how distractions and quick fixes aren't the best things to do all the time, and explore some techniques for reclaiming your ability to feel your emotions and improve your relationships.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Connect with your partner every day using Paired. Download the app at paired.com/MULTI.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/multi and get 10% off your first month.

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's question for our Q&A episode is addressing mismatched desire during busy, long-term partnered life and being stuck in "practical mode."

If you want to submit a question to be answered on one of the extra Q&A episodes we're doing for the next few months, become one of our Patreon supporters at www.patreon.com/multiamory.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're joined by Jeff Guenther, also known online as TherapyJeff! Jeff has joined us to talk about what he does, therapy, non-monogamy, and much more!

Jeff Guenther, aka TherapyJeff, is, according to him, the most handsome therapist on the internet and is an international treasure who made Portland Oregon cool when he moved there in 2005. Jeff dedicates his time to creating short videos for TikTok and Instagram, and hosting his weekly podcasts, 'Big Dating Energy' and Problem Solved.’ Honestly, we can’t believe he is on our show. What a blessing! Learn more about him at TherapyJeff.com.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Join Beducated for 40% off their yearly pass and level up your sex life at https://beducate.me/pd2412-multiamory with promo code multiamory

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY

Get hair care that is completely customized to your hair and your life AND get 15% off at Prose.com/multiamory

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/multi and get 10% off your first month.


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

During this mini episode, we're answering just one question from our Patreon community. Today we're discussing reframing relationships, de-escalation, and acceptance.

If you'd like to have your question answered on a future mini episode, visit patreon.com/multiamory and become one of our Patreon supporters!

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Breakup season has passed, so we're going to spend an episode talking about independence is important for everyone, regardless of your relationship status. We'll go over some research and demographics, some common misconceptions about singlehood, and finally, some lessons we can all take to heart about being independent and prioritizing our own desires.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Treat yourself to some stories to turn you on or help you drift off to sleep with an extended 30-day free trial at DipseaStories.com/multi

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/multi and get 10% off your first month.

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today, we're talking about honesty, and what makes it difficult to be honest with a partner. We all have difficulty with being honest sometimes, whether it's sharing a negative opinion about something or disclosing information about other partnerships. We're going to go over some of the research about what sometimes stops us from being honest in our relationships, and share some tools that can help you feel more comfortable being vulnerable and honest with people you love.

If this show is helpful to you, consider joining our amazing community of like-minded listeners at patreon.com/Multiamory. You can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, bonus episodes, and more!

Quality lube is essential for good sexual experiences. Try our absolute favorite, Uberlube and get 10% off plus free shipping with promo code MULTIAMORY

Get 20% off your first order of the world's smartest cat litter at prettylitter.com/multiamory with promo code MULTIAMORY


Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get $5 off off your Starter Pack (that’s over 40% off) with promo code MULTIAMORY at LumeDeodorant.com

Get hair care that is completely customized to your hair and your life AND get 15% off at Prose.com/multiamory


Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices