Here Be Monsters

Here Be Monsters Podcast

An independent podcast about fear, beauty and the unknown. Since 2012. Hosted by Jeff Emtman and others.

  • 40 minutes 9 seconds
    HBM158: An Illusion

    n the midst of a stressful move, HBM producer Jeff Emtman finds comfort in the phasing techniques developed by minimalist composer, Steve Reich

    Note: this episode contains sounds that cannot be accurately represented by speakers.  Please use headphones.  

    Steve Reich compositions excerpted in this episode: 

    Clapping Music, performed by Steve Reich and Wolfram Winkel

    Violin Phase, performed by Jonathan Morton 

    Pendulum Music, performed by Joan Cerveró, Víctor Trescolí, Isabel León, and  Estefanía Sánchez

    Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listener donations.  If you’d like to make a small monthly contribution, visit patreon.com/HBMpodcast

    Producer: Jeff Emtman

    14 December 2022, 11:25 pm
  • 39 minutes 51 seconds
    HBM157: The Raw Whatever

    Allen H Greenfield is a UFOlogist and occult researcher.  He’s also a father of three.  

    His first child, Alex was the subject of HBM155: Ghosts Aliens Burritos.  In that episode, Alex tells stories from his childhood of chasing strange phenomena with his father. 

    In this episode, Here Be Monsters host Jeff Emtman talks to Allen to get the “fatherly perspective” on UFOs, black lodges, tarot, The Day the Earth Stood Still, and (most of all) how to be a good parent. 

    Allen Greenfield is currently working on the final installment of a trilogy whose first two entries are Secret Cipher of the UFOnauts and Secret Rituals of the Men in Black.  The forthcoming book is yet to be titled. 

    Also heard on this episode: Rick Emtman, who is Jeff’s dad.

    Content Note: Language
    Producer: Jeff Emtman
    Music: Serocell, The Black Spot
    Sponsor: Pal’s Plants

    Pal’s Plants is a Flatbush, Brooklyn based subscription service for potted plants and intriguing zines.  

    Plants can be delivered to the 5 boroughs of New York City. 

    Zines can be delivered anywhere in the USA.  

    Pal’s Plants is customized to your preferences.  They’ll have you fill out a short survey when you sign up so that you can be sure to get something you like each month in the mail. 

    Pal’s Plants makes a great gift.  Use offer code HBM50 at signup to get half off your first month’s subscription.  

    Thank you Pal’s Plants for sponsoring Here Be Monsters.

    28 November 2022, 11:47 pm
  • 19 minutes 19 seconds
    HBM156: Heavy Load-Bearing Body

    Berlin’s Schwerbelastungskörper is a massive concrete structure that, today, is hidden in plain sight between a railroad and an apartment building.  It’s one of just a dozen remaining pieces of Nazi Architecture in Berlin.  And it’s not much to look at. It was built in 1941 as a test structure for a triumphal arch that Hitler wanted to build in that spot. 

    The Schwerbelastungskörper (“heavy load-bearing body”) is the arch’s test structure.  It weighs about 12,650 metric tonnes, or about 28 million pounds, and it’s the equivalent weight of one of the four massive legs of the never-built arch.

    This plan was abandoned as World War 2 accelerated.  And the structure remained, slowly sinking into Berlin’s marshy soil, providing proof of the arch’s impossibility. 

    In this episode, HBM host Jeff Emtman visits the Schwerbelastungskorper, records some impulse responses in the structure’s single room and reflects on his discomfort in finding beauty in another Nazi structure nearby, Tempelhof Airport (now a public park and refugee camp). 

    Also mentioned on this episode: The Berlin Airlift, Austrian Tyrol, The Little Mermaid (1989), and Der Herr Der Ringe (Lord of the Rings movies dubbed in German).  

    Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listener donations.  If you’d like to make a small monthly contribution, visit patreon.com/HBMpodcast

    Registration for the Here Be Monsters Art Exchange is open until November 10th, 2022.  Sign up: https://HBMpodcast.com/art/

    Producer: Jeff Emtman
    Music: The Black Spot

    9 November 2022, 5:16 pm
  • 12 minutes 34 seconds
    The HBM Art Exchange is Back!

    The Here Be Monsters Art Exchange is back!

    It’s a really simple and wonderful thing where you, gentle listener, can mail a piece of art to a stranger and get a piece of art in return. It’s open to artists of all experience levels from around the world.

    The deadline to sign up is November 10th, 2022. Sign up and more info here: https://www.hbmpodcast.com/art

    The art exchange is made possible this year by HBM listener Devon Sherman, who’s offered her time and expertise to help with communication between artists. Thank you Devon. Devon is a past participant in the art exchange, and has an ongoing project where she illustrates Robert Burton’s The Anatomy of Melancholy. Another listener, known as “Endless_Want”, also helped out by making the Art Exchange’s promotional video, which you can see on the sign-up page and on our Instagram and Twitter.

    Music: The Black Spot, Robbie Quine—Glitter Rock Werewolf

    24 October 2022, 9:56 pm
  • 32 minutes 16 seconds
    HBM155: Ghosts Aliens Burritos

    Content Note: pervasive language, brief mentions of bigotry.

    Alex Greenfield says that there was no such thing as a normal day when he was a kid.  His dad (Allen H Greenfield) self describes as a “researcher in the shadow world.” And his mom soon grew tired of her husband’s lifestyle, which included a lot of time on the road: chasing rumors of cryptids, ghosts, and aliens.  

    But after his parents split up, Alex, his dad, and an ever changing cast of motorcycle gang members and step-moms kept seeking the occult. 

    Some of the topics discussed in this episode: St. Simons Island in Georgia (and reported hauntings), The Okefenokee Swamp (and the ignition of swamp gas), The Three Mile Island Nuclear Accident (and subsequent protests), Mono Lake in California (and the UFO sightings  there), and a movie called Being There (wherein the character played by Peter Sellers appears to walk on water).

    Alex Greenfield is the writer of The Sand, 10.0 Earthquake, and other movies.  He also used to be the head writer for WWE Smackdown

    Alex’s dad, Allen H Greenfield (aka. T Allen Greenfield), is a UFOlogist and occultist.  He is the author of Secret Cipher of the UFOnauts, The Story Of The Hermetic Brotherhood Of Light, and other books. 

    Unrelated to this episode, but do give a listen to the limited series that Jeff’s been mixing for Crooked Media.  It’s called Another Russia, and it’s about the assassination of Russian dissident Boris Nemtsov, as told by Ben Rhodes and Zhanna Nemtsova.  Available now on every podcast app.  

    Also, Jeff’s headed back to Berlin, Germany for about a month.  If you know any good stories/interviews he should record while he’s there, send a DM on Twitter or Instagram, or use the contact form.

    Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listeners and sponsors

    Producer: Jeff Emtman

    Music: The Black Spot, Circling Lights, August Friis

    Sponsor: is / ought books  is / ought books is a publisher of spiral bound self help manuals, art books, and non literary works on paper.All titles from is / ought books are available to buy online via the link below. is / ought books are also distributed via Small Press Distribution (SPD).

    Thank you is / ought books for sponsoring Here Be Monsters.

    24 August 2022, 10:32 pm
  • 24 minutes 26 seconds
    HBM154: Ancient Roman Recipes

    Sally Grainger was originally a chef, but in her 20’s, she was gifted a copy of an ancient Roman cookbook called Apicius

    Apicius is a bit of a fluke.  It shouldn’t have survived the 2000-ish year journey into the modern era, but it did.  And in this episode of Here Be Monsters, Grainger explains how Apicius persisted due to being a favorite text for monks-in-training to practice their gilding skills.  And thus, this fascinating book of recipes (featuring cooking instructions for boiled ostrich soup, complex sauces, and cucumbers stewed with brains) is still feeding people today.

    While cuisine today might seem distant from ostrich soup, Grainger thinks that Roman food often gets inaccurately portrayed as overly decadent or overly spiced.  Cooked correctly, the cuisine is quite balanced, she says.  And in her book, Cooking Apicius, she uses her knowledge of ancient Roman life to put the recipes in context for a contemporary kitchen and contemporary cooks. 

    Also, on this episode, Jeff also reads from a 1932 English translation of Apicius by Joseph Dommers Vehling, which is available in the public domain thanks to Project Gutenberg

    Producer: Jeff EmtmanMusic: The Black Spot

    Have you seen the new HBM stickers? They’re beautiful.  Get yours here.  As of publish date: if you buy 4, one of them will be free.  The discount gets applied automatically when you add them to your cart.

    22 June 2022, 7:15 pm
  • 12 minutes 24 seconds
    The Straight and Narrow

    In 2012, a street preacher walking three small dogs tried to convince Jeff Emtman of his way of thinking about gender and the afterlife. 

    In this Here Be Monsters brief, Jeff shares the short essay he originally wrote about the dinner party where they attempted to make an uneasy friendship. 

    Jeff re-edited the essay in 2022 and gave pseudonyms to the main characters (“Cliff” and “Sophie”). 

    Producer: Jeff EmtmanMusic: The Black Spot

    Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listeners and advertisements from small businesses. If you’d like to support the show, consider sponsoring an episode, or becoming a supporter on Patreon

    Some other news: 

    1. Album of German field recordingsThe recordings from the last episode (HBM153: Klänge from Berlin) are now available as an album.  Listen and purchase here.

    2. New HBM stickers are here! They’re beautiful, screen printed, die-cut, clear vinyl versions of the “HBM” logo.  Available for purchase on the HBM store. Patreon supporters can get some for very nearly free by following the instructions in this post.

    2 June 2022, 7:13 pm
  • 50 minutes 15 seconds
    HBM153: Klänge from Berlin

    The composer Pauline Oliveros thought there was a difference between hearing and listening.  She defined hearing as a passive act, something done with the ears.  But she defined listening as something active saying that listening happens in the brain.  

    Sam Parker is a recordist who takes inspiration from Oliveros’ words and work.  About six years ago, on an episode of Here Be Monsters called Sam’s Japan Tapes, Sam shared dozens of recordings he made during his first (and only) trip to Japan.  He released those recordings under the name Observance as an album called Japan, 6/21 - 7/14.

    On this episode, Here Be Monsters host takes two trips to Germany, and records the sounds of Christmas in Berlin, New Years in Saxony, and many hours of people and birds just going about their daily lives in the late winter and early spring. 

    Before Jeff leaves on his first trip, he calls Sam Parker back, to ask for recording advice before the trip, and Sam offers three tips: 

    Take lots of time.

    Capture moments of everyday routine. 

    Trust your instincts


    The recordings on this episode are available as an album called “Field Recordings: Germany, 2021-2022” and it’s available for purchase on Bandcamp, under Jeff Emtman’s The Black Spot moniker.  Until June 30th, 2022, all profits from the sale of this album will be donated to The International Committee of the Red Cross

    Producer: Jeff Emtman
    Music: Remixes from the recording session in HBM049: Sam’s Japan Tapes.
    Photos: Jeff Emtman
    Thank Yous: Sam Parker, Johanna Gilje
    Sponsor:
    HBM’s Patreon Supporters

    Here Be Monsters’ supporters on Patreon send a small monthly (or yearly) donation to help cover Jeff’s living expenses, pay contractors, fees, taxes, etc.

    Listener Kit Roberts supports HBM on patreon, saying “I’m a patron of HBM because no other podcast has ever made me feel like this one does…so small and singular and yet connected to everything all at once.”

    Thank you so much, HBM Patrons.

    👽👉Become a patron👈👽

    Recordings heard in this episode

    MM:SS - Description.  (📸 means there’s a photo in the gallery)

    08:45 - Train to SeaTac airport.

    09:45 - Announcements on an Air France flight.

    11:00 - Turbulance and people rustling.

    12:30 - Berlin's Brandenburg Airport

    13:15 - A brown swan hissing and chirping

    13:30 - Boats rubbing against wooden piers and a small dog barking.

    14:15 - Cars driving on cobblestone streets.

    14:45 - Ice Skating at Berlin's Alexanderplatz 📸

    15:30 - Swing ride with metal chains at Alexanderplatz. 📸

    16:00 - Riding on the subway, then walking up several flights of stairs.

    18:45 - Radio playing advertisements, news, and christmas music

    20:45 -  A Christmas Eve service in a cathedral with a speaker reading a children's story.

    21:30 - Christmas carols playing as people mill around.

    22:00 - A wedding party in front of the Brandenburg Gate.

    23:15 - A Christmas exhibit with a lit up polar bear and fog machine.

    24:00 - Birds chirping in Berlin's Mauerpark as people walk by.

    25:00 - Crunching frosted leaves on a cold morning.

    25:30 - Walking through a forest in the Saxony Region of Eastern Germany.📸

    26:15 - Whistling through hands in the forest.

    27:00 - Buying 5 kilograms of potatoes from a vending machine as a dog barks.📸

    27:30 - Mountaintop shop selling hot drinks and snacks in Czechia.

    27:45 - Chopping kindling. Distant fireworks echoing through the hills in Saxony.

    28:30 - Snaps and pops of a small fire

    29:00 - Distant fireworks to celebrate the start of 2022.

    29:30 - Close fireworks echoing.

    30:00 - A strong wind blowing on a mountaintop in Saxony.📸

    30:30 - A tree swing creaking.

    31:15 - 6AM on the outskirts of Berlin.  Traffic starting, crow screaming.

    32:45 - Captive pigeons fluffing their feathers and cooing at Hasenheide Park

    34:00 - Slow motion recording of a sudden hailstorm.

    34:30 - A motorized billboard in a subway station

    35:00 - Accordion player performs in a subway station in Berlin's Mitte neighborhood.

    37:45 - Applause after a play.

    38:15 - A small bird singing several songs.

    39:30 - Church bells ringing.

    40:45 - Wind flapping the torn domes of the Teufelsberg listening station as people sing.📸

    43:00 - Walking through the forest near Teufelsberg as bikes pass.

    4 May 2022, 6:50 pm
  • 35 minutes 7 seconds
    HBM152: Dirt Becomes You

    What do you want to happen to your body when you die?  It’s a touchy topic where tradition, religion and death denial all come into play.  But across much of the world, there are just two options: burial and cremation, which both have substantial ecological impacts

    In 2019, Washington State passed SB 5001, which legalized several new options for deathcare. 

    In this episode, host Jeff Emtman visits Return Home, a facility in Auburn, Washington that’s using one of those new options, called “Natural Organic Reduction” (NOR) which is commonly called “human composting”.  

    Return Home has built the world’s largest NOR facility to date, with 74 available individual vessels.  Their process (which they’ve trademarked as “Terramation”) takes about two month to complete, and involves dressing a deceased person in a pressed cotton gown and placing them a bed of organic material, and left to naturally break down using active composting techniques that bring the contents of the vessel to well above 100° Fahrenheit for much of the composting period. 

    The techniques used by Return Home were largely inspired by Katrina Spade, a death activist and the owner of Recompose, another NOR facility located near Seattle.  Spade was one of the people who strongly advocated for the passage of SB 5001.

    There’s currently one other NOR facility in Washington State: Herland Forrest in Wahkiacus.  Currently two other states, Colorado and Oregon have legalized NOR.  

    NOR’s future isn’t known.  It’s new and still relatively rare. Do enough people want to be composted to have it be a viable business model? Each of these companies have different approaches to their process.  

    Return Home’s model relies on scale.  They wouldn’t disclose the exact cost of building their facility, or how many simultaneous descendants they’d need in their facility to be profitable.  As of publishing, they charge $4,950 for their process and they have 15 of their 74 slots occupied.  

    And in some ways, the full ecological benefits for Return Home’s process also rely on scale.  In a follow up email, CEO Micah Truman stated that “We calculate our inputs as follows. Our electricity bill each month is about $1,700, and is sufficient to Terramate 74 bodies. This comes to $22 per body. In current gas terms ($5 a gallon at present) that is roughly 4 gallons of gas, which is about 1/8 the amount of gas used for cremation. The number is actually quite a bit better than that, as our electricity bill also powers our entire facility, not just the Terramation equipment.”

    When asked about the relative emptiness of the facility, Katey Houston (Return Home’s Services Manager) said, “The funeral industry is so slow to change. When cremation became a thing, it took sixty years to become mainstream.  The fact that we’ve served just over thirty families now in four months, is quite amazing.  And we’ve continued to grow month-over-month, and that’s all I can ask for.”

    Thank you Hannah Suzanna for help with research for this episode. 

    Here Be Monsters is an independent, listener supported podcast.  Consider supporting the show on Patreon

    Producer: Jeff Emtman

    Music: The Black Spot and Serocell


    Sponsor:
    Sleep With Me Podcast

    Sleep With Me is a podcast that helps you fall asleep.  Host Drew Ackerman tells tangential stories, reads old catalogs, makes metaphors about washing machines, and does other calming things all in pursuit of slowing your mind down and letting you drift off to sleep more peacefully.  Subscribe to Sleep With Me on any podcast app.

    30 March 2022, 8:23 pm
  • 27 minutes 13 seconds
    HBM151: Blowgun Time Warp

    Season 10 of Here Be Monsters starts and host Jeff Emtman hallucinates his adolescence while working long hours.  Scenes from middle school dances, dawn bus rides, the basement, and ( most crucially), a late-night raffle at a hardware store.

    Do you like Here Be Monsters? Tell your friends, support HBM on Patreon, and have your boss sponsor an episode.

    Producer: Jeff Emtman

    Music: Serocell and The Black Spot


    Sponsor:
    RadioLab

    Are you curious about the world, but also want to be surprised, and even moved? Radiolab experiments with sound and storytelling allowing science to fuse with culture, and information to sound like… well, music. Join hosts Lulu Miller and Latif Nasser for an experiential investigation that explores themes and ideas through a patchwork of people, sounds, and stories. Listen to Radiolab

    9 March 2022, 10:32 pm
  • 4 minutes 41 seconds
    Season 10 is Coming!

    Season 10 is nearly here!  The season starts on March 9th and episodes will be released on a rolling basis until all ten shows are published.

    Want to advertise on an episode? Fill out the sponsorship request form

    Want to support HBM with a small monthly donation?  Become a patron on Patreon

    Can’t wait to share the season with you.  More soon. 

    Producer: Jeff Emtman
    Music: The Black Spot

    11 February 2022, 7:36 am
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