With Todd and Cathy Adams
Todd and Cathy discussed the importance of developing talents and the challenges of pursuing one’s passions. They also emphasized the need for understanding and empathizing when teenage boys lash out or question their belonging (they share an audioclip from Dr. John Duffy). They shared the difference between empathy and sympathy, and why it’s important to be really clear about what you need and ask for it. They ended the show by discussing the victim, villain, hero triangle and what it really means when you are ‘hero-ing’ someone.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:03:44) Passion vs Talent
(00:27:14) Do our boys feel lost?
(00:29:35) Join Team Zen
(00:42:02) Empathy vs sympathy
(00:48:25) Not letting it sit *
(00:59:26) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
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Cathy and Todd discuss the distinction between weaponized incompetence and regular incompetence, exploring how gender norms and societal expectations shape these ideas. They engage in real-time reflection on how they navigate these dynamics within their partnership and parenting, and they stress the need for communication and flexibility depending on the situation. This is a good episode to listen to with your partner or friends! Lots of issues to discuss and process.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:29:15) Join Team Zen
(00:39:25) Cathy “I’m good at this” *
(00:50:44) Seeing vs needing *
(01:03:48) Weaponized incompetence ? through the lens of making the bed *
(00:59:26) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
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Todd and Cathy discuss two factors that make parenting feel more self-directed and understandable. While it will still be messy, unpredictable, and tiring, at least you will feel more in your integrity while doing it! They also talk about listening skills, anxiety, NCAA basketball, and Beyoncé’s new album.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:00:00) Intro
(00:03:34) Tournament of Bad
(00:10:24) 5 regrets of dying
(00:15:30) The differences in the way we watch sports
(00:29:06) The first secret to parenting
(00:37:30) The second secret to parenting
(00:38:05) Todd’s Starbuck’s story
(00:40:11) Cathy’s late bus story
(00:52:00) The 1 rule of parenting
(00:59:26) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
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Todd and Cathy discuss about how genuine curiosity helps our kids really hear us and value what we’re saying. The same goes for understanding each other in a partnership or empathizing with someone from a different gender perspective. When we’re open about not having all the answers, it paves the way for learning and staying connected.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:00:00) Intro
(00:19:31) Team Zen
(00:21:27) Can’t throw water at a closed door
(00:26:24) Having a conversation with your kids about Sephora *
(00:40:42) The greatness of Caitlin Clark- the difference ways of greatness *
(00:48:41) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
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Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of emotional conversations with our kids and why we need to pay attention to how we experience and perceive what our children are telling us. They discuss what kids really need from us when they are emotional and how we can support them without absolving or absorbing their pain. They also discuss Friday Night Videos and commercials from the 80’s.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:00:00) Intro
(00:12:54) The Do’s & Don’ts of Emotional Conversations
(00:20:40) Cathy’s experience of parents at school presentations
(00:30:08) Team Zen
(00:35:03) The two phrases that can help
(00:40:08) What to do when they dump all of their day right before you go to bed
(00:42:00) How to prep for the emotional conversations
(00:58:48) Todd’s vs Cathy’s default
(01:03:23) Jeremy Kraft Avid Co- Jeremy Kraft the bald-headed beauty from Avid Co – Painting and remodeling for the western suburbs 630-956-1800
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Todd & Cathy discuss why it’s the ordinary moments that make us feel connected and content, and why what we end up missing are the simple things, not the big things. They also discuss the five things that make someone a Gen Xer, have a follow-up discussion about astrology and its usefulness, and Cathy talks about her new book RESTORING OUR GIRLS, coming in early 2025.
Join Team Zen to hear Cathy & Todd’s talk about bringing genuine romance back into your relationship (3/18, 7 pm).
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:01:22) ZPR Women’s March Madness Pool
(00:08:06) Moment- Astrology
(00:13:25) The warrior “bang bang” *
(00:16:28) Tournament of Bad -Frustrations with kids and doordash
(00:21:15) Workshop titled “Sephora Kids”
(00:26:42) Team Zen
(00:30:52) Restoring Our Girls Announcement
(00:36:27) The Ordinary is the Extraordinary
(01:00:05) Jeremy Kraft Avid Co- Jeremy Kraft the bald-headed beauty from Avid Co – Painting and remodeling for the western suburbs 630-956-1800
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Todd and Cathy discuss the stories we create about our lives and process whether or not we can reconsider our stories – not to deny reality, but to focus on what’s working rather than what’s lost. They also talk about role models for men, why it’s important to acknowledge every aspect of ourselves, what’s going on with Hall&Oates, and whether or not astrology is a science-based tool.
Join Team Zen to hear Cathy & Todd’s talk about bringing genuine romance back into your relationship (3/18, 7 pm).
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
David Serrano Personal Financial Advisor
Monday Night Wildcard- True Romance (all genders)
Jeremy Kraft from Avid Painting and Remodeling 630-956-1800
Time Stamps
(00:09:45) Ghosts-
(00:15:19) Travis and Jason Kelse- healthy masculinity?
(00:26:55) Zen Parenting Moment brought to you by David Serrano Financial Advisor Services 815-370-3780
(00:30:39) Stories and meaning we create
(00:31:10) Team Zen
(00:43:32) Astrology
(01:02:10) Jeremy Kraft from Avid Co – Painting and remodeling for the western suburbs 630-956-1800
(00:09:45) Zen Parenting Moment brought to you by 815-370-3780
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Cathy and Todd discuss why we struggle to show up as fully ourselves in groups, and how we can get better at noticing this behavior. Then Todd says, “I’m just not feeling it” so they move into a pop culture conversation that seems to be about nothing, or maybe it was about a lot of little somethings including Bon Jovi, the members of New Edition, why stuffed animals are important, how Cathy got their daughter to stop stealing her brush, why Cathy’s college friends are so funny, and the importance of capybaras, cats, interrogation videos and gorillas on Reels & TikTok. Join Team Zen to hear Cathy & Todd’s talk about bringing genuine romance back into your relationship (3/18, 7 pm).
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
David Serrano Personal Financial Advisor
Monday Night Wildcard- True Romance (all genders)
Time Stamps
(00:05:56) Bad Medicine
(00:09:45) Zen Parenting Moment brought to you by David Serrano Financial Advisor Services 815-370-3780
(00:14:54) Cool it now
(00:16:37) Kids love to correct us
(00:18:42) Kids need to conform
(00:20:49) Cathy’s meditation area
(00:24:53) Cathy’s trivia
(00:27:42) A discussion about Monkey
(00:36:25) Cathy laughs hard
(00:39:43) Favorite animals
(00:28:22) The show is about nothing
(00:50:15) Monday Night Wildcard- True Romance (all genders)
(00:51:35) Join Team Zen
(00:52:48) MenLiving Eastern Advance
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Cathy and Todd discuss how our upbringing shapes our current approach to parenting, share why some traditional parenting tricks fall short, and attempt to redefine romance—it’s not just about grand gestures, but the heartfelt intentions behind them.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
David Serrano Personal Financial Advisor
WHY TIME-OUTS DON’T WORK – WHAT TO DO INSTEAD
Time Stamps
(00:03:43) Zen Parenting Moment brought to you by Financial Advisor David Serrano
(00:09:18) Why timeouts don’t work
(00:15:13) The should of motherhood
(00:28:00) David Serrano Financial Advisor Services 815-370-3780
(00:28:54) Join Team Zen
(00:29:58) Drinking in front of our kids
(00:39:09) Being romantic (or not)
3 Ways to Support Us
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Cathy and Todd discuss an article from The New York Times titled, ‘Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With It,‘ explaining that staying intimately connected to our older children has benefits, not just risks, and most young adults agree. They discuss the perspectives of previous generations and why things have changed, as well as why it’s easy to stay connected due to devices and the research around effective parenting. They also discuss the fascination with OOTD (outfit of the day) and GRWM (get ready with me) on social media and how we can talk to our kids about comparison culture and self-worth.
For the full show notes, visit zenparentingradio.com.
Resources
David Serrano Personal Financial Advisor
Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With It
Time Stamps
(00:01:52) Zen Parenting Moment brought to you by Financial Advisor David Serrano
(00:03:11) Secret love commercial
(00:15:38) Macaroni & cheese
(00:20:54) Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With It
(00:26:44) David Serrano Financial Advisor Services 815-370-3780
(00:27:38) Join Team Zen
(00:28:50) Todd’s stories generation comparison
3 Ways to Support Us
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This week’s sponsor(s):
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If You’ve Come this Far Podcast
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