- 46 minutes 29 secondsThe 3-Step System for Simplifying Your Work and Life
When people are faced with problems and complexity, our instinct is to add instead of subtract. As a result, we have a tendency to make our work and our lives more and more complex, and less and less effective and fulfilling. Even when what we add is new technology that promises to make us more productive, it often only seems to bog us down and give us even more to do.
My guest says that to fight this drift toward complexity, especially in the modern age, you’ve got to be ruthless about cutting out the superfluous and focusing on what’s most important. His name is Jim VandeHei, and he’s the co-founder and CEO of Axios and the co-author of Simplify.
Today on the show, Jim explains how to simplify your work and personal life using a three-step process: confront, delete, and amplify. We discuss how to identify the “slop” we’re all inundated with (and he’s not just talking about what’s generated by AI), rules of thumb for what to say no to, why you should spend more time developing your strengths than fixing your weaknesses, and the importance of getting clear on what you want out of life, both personally and professionally.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Jim's Book: Simplify: Do 50 Percent More with 50 Percent Less
- Jim's last appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #987 — The No-BS Secrets of Success
- Smart Brevity: The Power of Saying More with Less
- AoM Article: The Spiritual Disciplines — Simplicity
- AoM Podcast #699: The No-Nonsense Guide to Simplifying Every Aspect of Your Life
Connect With Jim VandeHei
0:00 Introduction & Website Redesign
0:48 The Problem with Complexity
1:56 Interview Begins: Why Another Book on Simplifying?
3:00 How AI Makes Life More Complex
5:42 The Confront, Delete, Amplify Framework
8:14 Why Complexity Creeps Into Everything
11:35 Identifying Slop in Work and Life
17:43 How to Confront Your Habits
24:59 Rules for Saying No
29:48 Amplify Strengths Over Weaknesses
37:35 Simplifying Communication at Work
42:29 Using AI to Simplify Your Life
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15 September 2026, 10:00 am - 48 minutes 2 secondsIf I Don’t Return: A General's Wartime Journal for His Sons
When Mark Hertling learned he was deploying for Operation Desert Storm, he decided to start a journal.
Back then, Mark was an Army major and cavalry officer with two young sons. His unit would be out in front of the main force, and during an intelligence briefing, he was told it could suffer casualties as high as 50 percent. Mark realized there was a real chance he might not come home. So he began writing down what he was experiencing, along with the lessons about life, leadership, and character that he wanted his boys to know if he wasn’t there to teach them himself.
Mark did come home, and went on to serve 38 years in the Army, including as an assistant division commander in Baghdad and later commander of the 1st Armored Division in Iraq during the 2007–2008 surge, before finishing his career as commander of U.S. Army Europe.
Decades later, that wartime journal became the basis for his new book, If I Don’t Return. Today on the show, retired three-star General Mark Hertling and I talk about the reflections it contains on making every day count, planning for friction, marriage and friendship, handwritten notes, casual profanity, the moral weight of war, and what it means to build a man.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- My Life
- On War by Carl von Clausewitz
- AoM Article: Clausewitz on Overcoming the Annoying Slog of Life
- General Douglas MacArthur’s Prayer for His Son
Connect With Mark Hertling
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8 September 2026, 10:00 am - 55 minutes 59 secondsTo Change Yourself, Change Your Situation
Professor of psychology Angela Duckworth is famous for her work on grit — the combination of passion and perseverance that leads to high achievement. But she’s come to an increasing appreciation for the fact that success isn't just a matter of the qualities inside you; it's also driven by what's outside you — your peers, your mentors, and even your zip code.
Today on the show, Angela, whose latest book is Situated: Find the People and Places That Bring Out Your Best, shares how our environments play a much bigger role in shaping us than we realize. She explains the three-box model of behavior, why relying on willpower is a fallible strategy for altering your habits, and why the most effective way to change yourself is to change what’s around you. We discuss how different situations bring out different versions of ourselves and how to shape your surroundings to encourage good habits, mitigate bad ones, and become who you want to be — whether that means rearranging what’s on your desk or moving across the country.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Angela's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #210 — Got Grit?
- AoM Podcast #887: The Golden Rules of Success With Bob Bowman
- AoM Podcast #1,023: Is Self-Control Overrated? With Michael Inzlicht
- Dying Breed Article: The Power of "I Like," or Why Do People Hate the Idea of Motivation?
- AoM Article: Alexander Graham Bell’s Secret to Greater Productivity
- AoM Article: The Ceiling Word Art of Michel de Montaigne
Connect With Angela Duckworth
0:00 Introduction
1:42 From Grit to Situated
4:18 Michael Phelps: Grit Meets Environment
8:43 The Three-Box Model Explained
12:28 Why Willpower Fails
19:18 Multiple Selves & Code Switching
26:30 Saving a Marriage Through Situational Change
31:51 Curating Your Physical Space
38:26 Shaping Your Digital Environment
43:14 Social Environment & Accountability
47:05 Culture, Microcultures & the Flywheel
53:15 Start With Situational Awareness
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1 September 2026, 10:00 am - 53 minutes 5 secondsThe Lost Virtue of Thumos (And Why Men Need It)
The ancient Greeks believed the human soul had three parts: reason, appetite, and something called thumos. Thumos is difficult to translate into English. It encompasses anger, noble spiritedness, pride, ambition, a sense of honor, and the drive to act. The Greeks thought it was essential to living a life of manly virtue, and my guest thinks we could use a lot more of it.
His name is Mike LeBlanc, and he’s a decorated Marine, a Harvard Business School grad, a tech founder, and the author of What If Anger Is the Answer? Today on the show, Mike and I discuss how the angry energy of thumos can help you close the gap between who you are and who you should be. We discuss why physical training helps cultivate thumos, how it can be an aid in overcoming appetites, overthinking, passivity, and cynicism, and the role it can play in being an effective leader.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- AoM Article: Got Thumos?
- AoM Article: 10 Movies That Inspire Thumos
- AoM Article: Soundtrack for Your Thumos
- AoM Article: How to Make Anger Your Ally
- AoM Podcast #1,083: Good Anger — Harnessing a Misunderstood Emotion
- AoM Series: The Life of Jack London as a Case Study in the Power and Perils of Thumos
Connect With Mike LeBlanc
0:00 Introduction
1:42 Meet Mike LeBlanc: Marines, Great Books & Robotics
5:45 A Letter to His Son: What It Means to Be a Man
8:07 Socrates' Metaphor: The Little Man, the Hydra & the Lion
15:26 The Attributes of Thumos: Dignity, Pride & Shame
17:36 Thumos and Action: The Soul's Three Parts at Work
20:19 Thumos in Defending Boundaries
25:31 Thumos and the Physical Body
31:36 Thumos vs. Overthinking: The 70% Solution
36:03 Thumos, Power & Authority in Leadership
44:42 Overcoming Cynicism with Thumos
49:46 Raising Boys with Thumos & Where to Find the Book
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25 August 2026, 10:00 am - 45 minutes 6 secondsThe Secrets of Supercommunicators
Note: This is a rebroadcast.
Have you ever known one of those people who seemed to be able to connect with anyone? The kind of person who had the ability to make others feel understood and smoothly navigate even the trickiest of conversations?
Charles Duhigg calls these folks “supercommunicators,” and he’s the author of a new book by the same name. Today on the show, Charles explains that what underlies supercommunicators’ skill in connection is something called the matching principle, and he unpacks how it works and how you can put it to use in your own conversations. We discuss several techniques for how to figure out what kind of conversation you’re having, so you can align your language and energy with the other person. And because emotional conversations can be particularly difficult, we dig into tactics for successfully navigating them, even when they contain a high degree of conflict. We also get into how to carry the skills of connection into your digital conversations.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Charles’ previous appearances on the AoM podcast:
- Episode #61: The Power of Habit
- Episode #196: The Science of Self-Motivation & Productivity
- AoM Podcast #559: How to Handle Difficult Conversations
Connect With Charles Duhigg
0:00 — Intro & Rebroadcast Notice
0:32 — Why Communication Matters
2:08 — The Matching Principle
5:07 — Deep Questions & FBI Negotiator Felix Sigala
9:50 — Identifying What Kind of Conversation You're Having
10:52 — Setting Goals & Preparing for Conversations
15:06 — Conversations as Quiet Negotiations
19:07 — Navigating Emotional Conversations
24:11 — Turning Shallow Questions Into Deep Questions
28:00 — Mood, Energy & NASA's Emotional Intelligence Test
32:34 — Looping for Understanding & High-Conflict Conversations
38:38 — Digital Communication & Closing
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18 August 2026, 10:00 am - 51 minutes 30 secondsThe Joy of Touching Grass (and Knobs, Buttons, and Boarding Passes)
Remember the old hotel ice machines? The kind where you'd slide your bucket under the chute and hear the avalanche of cubes crashing into it? There was something so fun and strangely gratifying about that thing.
Or think about breaking an icicle off the edge of a roof. Such a gratifying feeling from such a small act.
My guest has written an ode to the outsized pleasures that arise from these kinds of everyday interactions with the physical world. His name is Ian Bogost, and his new book is The Small Stuff. Today on the show, Ian argues that a fulfilling life isn't built solely by chasing the big components of happiness but also by embracing the small moments of gratification that are woven throughout ordinary life. We discuss how those moments can be found in tactile experiences like shifting a manual transmission, turning a well-made knob, or flipping through the pages of a real menu. We explore how these small opportunities for engagement — for contact, connection, and control— have been disappearing as the world becomes more digitized and automated and everything becomes a touchscreen. And Ian shares how opportunities for "sensory enchantment" can still be found in our increasingly dematerialized world.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Ian's previous appearance on the AoM Podcast: Episode #247 — The Pleasure of Limits, the Uses of Boredom, and the Antidote to Excessive Irony
- Ian's Atlantic article "The End of Manual Transmission"
- Andy Rooney compilation
Connect With Ian Bogost
0:00 Introduction
0:40 Ian Bogost and 'The Small Stuff'
2:25 What Kickstarted This Book
6:38 Happiness, Satisfaction, and Gratification
14:58 Gratification Is Everywhere — But Disappearing
18:28 Dematerialization: How the World Is Losing Sensory Richness
26:41 How Work Has Become Less Gratifying
33:09 How to Reclaim Your Sensory Life
38:35 Keep More Junk Around
44:38 Talk About Small Pleasures
48:17 Living Life Sideways (Orthogonality)
50:03 Wrap-Up
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11 August 2026, 9:00 am - 50 minutes 49 secondsBig P vs. Little P Purpose: Why You Don't Need to Find Your One True Calling
People are told their whole lives how important it is to find their purpose. But many find the search frustrating. They feel there's one true calling or one grand goal they're supposed to be pursuing, but they can't seem to discern what it is.
My guest, Jordan Grumet, author of The Purpose Code, says that searching for what he calls your big P purpose can be fruitless and even harmful, and that a better path is to embrace a life of little p purposes. Today on the show, Jordan explains the difference between big P and little p purposes and argues that the former can lead to anxiety while embracing the latter can be the path to meaning, satisfaction, connection, and even the legacy you were looking for in the first place. We discuss how Jordan found his way to this philosophy after burning out as a doctor, practical ways to discover your own little p purposes, what he thinks we get wrong in making family our purpose, and what his work in hospice has taught him about living a life without regret.
Connect With Jordan Grumet
00:00 Intro & Show Overview
0:41 Meet Jordan Grumet
1:46 From Doctor to Purpose Writer
5:00 Big P vs Little P Purpose
8:32 Why Purpose Talk Makes People Anxious
11:15 What the Research Says
13:42 Burnout and Big P Purpose
16:18 The Podcasting Example: Process vs Goals
19:42 Legacy Through Little P Purpose
28:24 Finding Your Purpose Anchors
38:01 The Climb: Building Your Purpose
43:14 Family, Regrets, and Final Thoughts
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4 August 2026, 10:00 am - 52 minutes 37 secondsRestless, Rooted: What the Odyssey Reveals About Americans' Divided Souls
With the release of Christopher Nolan's adaptation of the Odyssey, it seems like everyone's been talking about a 3,000-year-old epic again. But my guest thinks this ancient tale offers a framework for understanding our modern lives that you probably haven't heard before.
Patrick Deneen is a professor of political science and the author of American Odyssey. Today on the show, Patrick argues that Odysseus embodies a tension that has defined the human experience, and especially the American experience: we're both home-seeking and exploring, rooted and restless. We long to settle down somewhere, yet we're equally driven to push beyond the horizon in search of something new. Patrick shares how Alexis de Tocqueville made this observation about our country two centuries ago, how Odysseus navigates the temptation to become both more than human and less than human, and the surprising act Patrick thinks is the most heroic thing Odysseus does. We end our conversation with the idea that having a home can give us the confidence to explore, or as David Brooks put it, "All of life is a series of daring explorations from a secure base."
Resources Related to the Podcast
- AoM Article: 3 Lessons From Homer’s Odyssey
- AoM Podcast #337: What Homer’s Odyssey Can Teach Us Today
- Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville
- "Ulysses" by Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Connect With Patrick Deneen
0:00 Intro & sponsor plugs
0:41 Patrick Deneen's American Odyssey & Nolan's film
2:28 Nolan's changes to Odysseus's character
4:56 Dante's Odysseus in hell
7:33 Why Odyssey keeps drawing Patrick back
13:02 The most American text: home-seeking vs exploring
17:15 Tocqueville's restless Americans
20:03 Restlessness as source of American unhappiness
21:03 Odysseus vs the temptation to be more/less than human
26:14 That temptation in modern American life
31:26 Odysseus's underworld talk with Achilles
39:41 What today's Americans can take from that
41:24 Does Odysseus stay home? The "sequels" to The Odyssey
45:49 Home as the foundation for risk-taking and adventure
51:14 Where to find the book
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28 July 2026, 10:00 am - 1 hour 25 secondsThe Secret Skills of Master Negotiators
When most people think of negotiation, they picture big, high-stakes moments: haggling over the price of a house, negotiating a starting salary, or hammering out the terms of a business deal. But negotiation is also something we do every day. It’s working out who’s taking on which chores with your spouse, convincing a coworker to help on a project, or even deciding where to go for dinner with friends. The better you understand negotiation — which is really about influencing other people’s decisions — the better you’ll be at navigating conflicts and opportunities both big and small.
My guest has spent decades studying the art and science of wielding that influence. John Richardson teaches negotiation at MIT’s Sloan School of Management and is the co-author of Never Settle. Today on the show, John shares what he learned from negotiation legends like Roger Fisher, co-author of Getting to Yes, and FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss. He unpacks the skills of master negotiators, including how to build reciprocity, uncover what people actually want, and keep your emotions from hijacking your judgment. We also get into the part of negotiation that makes people the most uncomfortable: the back-and-forth over hard numbers like price and salary and how to handle those conversations with greater confidence and better results.
- Resources Related to the PodcastAoM Podcast #234: Haggling and Deal Making Advice From a FBI Hostage Negotiator (With Chris Voss)
- AoM Podcast #559: How to Handle Difficult Conversations (With Sheila Heen)
- Influence: The Essential Guide to the Psychology of Influence and Persuasion in Everyday Life by Robert B. Cialdini
- AoM Article: How Labeling Your Emotions Can Help You Take Control
- Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher
- Start with NO…The Negotiating Tools that the Pros Don’t Want You to Know by Jim Camp
Connect With John Richardson
0:00 Everyday Negotiation & Meet John Richardson
2:18 John's Path Into Negotiation
9:50 Why People Fear Negotiation
12:34 Roger Fisher's Philosophy (Getting to Yes)
17:46 Chris Voss & Hostage Negotiation Tactics
22:54 Give Them a Sandwich (Reciprocity)
30:06 Using Someone's Name
33:59 Managing Your Emotions
39:00 Figuring Out What Everyone Wants
46:29 Distributive Negotiation & Anchoring
54:52 Alternatives, Saying No & Closing
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21 July 2026, 10:00 am - 53 minutes 50 secondsThe Art of Easy Discipline
Most people assume that if a goal is hard to achieve, getting there has to feel hard too. We tend to believe that extraordinary results require extraordinary suffering.
But my guest says the secret to success isn't gritting your teeth; it's making the path enjoyable. His name is Jia Jiang, and in his new book, Easy Discipline, he argues that consistency comes from designing your work and your life so that doing the right thing becomes something you actually want to do. Today on the show, Jia explains the difference between hard and easy discipline, why "eating bitterness" isn't the best way to go after your ambitions, and how to make your work feel more like play without lowering your standards. Along the way, we discuss Soviet hockey, Japanese tea ceremonies, rejection therapy, one-action goals, and the power of pursuing aims that are an expression of who you are.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Jia's previous book: Rejection Therapy
- Jia's 100 Days of Rejection Therapy videos, including asking for a "burger refill"
- AoM Article: Motivation Over Discipline
- AoM Podcast #954: The Feel-Good Method of Productivity
Connect With Jia Jiang
0:00 Introduction to the AOM Podcast
0:41 Introducing Jia Jiang and Easy Discipline
1:36 Welcome Jia Jiang / The Myth of Sisyphus
6:05 Hard Discipline vs. Easy Discipline
9:36 Eating Bitterness
10:44 Soviet Hockey: Tarasov vs. Tikhonov
16:02 The EASY Framework: Enjoyment
31:02 Artistry and Ichi-go Ichi-e
33:54 Systems and One Action Goals
41:22 Repetition with Variation
44:18 Why: Being True to Yourself
52:33 Where to Find Jia Jiang's Work
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
14 July 2026, 10:30 am - 50 minutes 7 secondsBeyond Midlife Myths: Why Middle Age Can Be Your Prime Time
Many of us grow up believing that midlife is when things start going downhill. Your body's breaking down, your best work is behind you, and you may fall into a full-blown existential crisis. But a lot of what we think we know about midlife turns out to be based more on pop culture than actual research.
My guest says the reality is much more encouraging. Her name is Margie Lachman. She's a professor of psychology, the Director of the Lifespan Lab at Brandeis University, and the author of Primetime: A New Vision for Midlife. Today on the show, Margie discusses what age range constitutes midlife — and how it's not just a matter of chronological age — and whether people really become less happy and experience a midlife crisis during these years. She explains the surprising ways your mind continues to improve even as some abilities slow down, and why this stage of life often represents a peak combination of creativity and judgment. We also talk about the real challenges that come with midlife and how adopting the right mindset and habits can mitigate those downsides while helping you make the most of what Margie argues can truly be a sweet spot in life — a time when you still have much of your physical and mental vitality, and it's coupled with seasoned experience and wisdom.
Resources Related to the Podcast
- Seasons of a Man’s Life by Daniel Levinson
- AoM series on Levinson’s research
- Transformations: Growth and Change in Adult Life by Roger Gould
- Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Life by Gail Sheehy
- AoM Podcast #598: Journeying From the First to the Second Half of Life With James Hollis
- AoM Podcast #776: How to Shift Out of the Midlife Malaise
Connect With Margie Lachman
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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