NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

Patrick Melton

For over TEN YEARS, Nobody Likes Onions has been making audiences laugh at the absurd, the obvious, and the wrong. Comedian Patrick Melton, along with other entertainers from New York City and around the world, gather around microphones three times a week to present their unique observations and opinions about current events, pop culture, and real-world experiences in their personal lives.

  • 5 hours 30 minutes
    February 2, 2026: A Really BIG Offer! Mersh vs. Schmuel! Summer Sinclair LIVE! KarmicX & More!

    Stuttering John has challenged Rocco to a boxing match, and Rocco has accepted. But in this world people are constantly challeging each other to fights that never happen. Will this be different? Summer Sinclair is cranking away at her comedy career and it’s time we checked in on her. Mersh is done with the Dabbleverse and it looks like resident grandpa Schmuel Buckman has triggered yet another streamer. Karmic isn’t doing well after his recent “accidental” reveal that he is traveling with Felicia Gillespie. Let’s also watch on of the latest Chad’s Wet Brained Follies courtesy of the one and only Chad Boozemock!

    2 February 2026, 10:52 am
  • 6 hours 3 minutes
    BONUS NOTHING! Saturday Night Squirts!

    Why don’t you duck-walk your silly ass on over here an plant one on me, Sally!

    1 February 2026, 7:27 am
  • 4 hours 39 minutes
    January 29, 2026: Matt Mead Can’t Stop! Mersh Explains! Steel Toe Beg Time! Chad Zumock Drunk!

    Chad Zumock is having a rough time between his tiny apartment being revealed, harassing deliveries during his show, and now his fake girlfriend breaking up with him and his dreams of being a homeowner evaporating. Matt Mead still hasn’t learned damage control and continues to make things worse for himself. Aaron Imholte is doing great, crushing the haters and making us feel! Mersh thinks Patrick plays dumb for content, but on this show Patrick plans to play even dumber!

    30 January 2026, 7:27 am
  • 7 hours 6 minutes
    January 26, 2026: BRING A SPOON! Chad! Kevin! Scarlett! Karmic! Toe!

    Is Matt Mead the biggest simp you’ve ever seen in your life? Or is he just a complete idiot? You be the judge! Karmic gets cryptic about his life and wherabouts while revealing even more about his life an whereabouts. Scarlett continues her parade of shows while completely alienating her original e-Daddy Mersh, who completely loses it on her for her appearance on Ethan Ralph’s show. Aaron Imholte spent the weekend neglecting his kids again to go out on the streets and play news man, and he still can’t hit a goal.

    26 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 3 hours 42 minutes
    THIS LITTLE PIGGY: A Steel Toe Morning Show Roundtable Discussion (January 23, 2026)

    With the lowest numbers he’s ever had, and hypocrisy galore, things just keep getting better for Steel Toe! Join Patrick, Karl from WATP, and Moody as they discuss the hilarity of the week from Aaron Imholte and his Steel Toe Morning Show. The man who refuses to get a job never ceases to captivate while ratcheting up his lies and sperg-sessions for our amusement.

    23 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 4 hours 41 minutes
    January 22, 2026: Stuttering John On Hackamania! Bower In Distress! Chad Zumock Walk Stream!

    Patrick has put out an offer for Stuttering John to come to Hackamania, but just like a bunch of buffoons before him, he’s handled in the wrong way! Felicia Gillespie has a track record of being completely nuts when it comes to relationships. Michael Ray Bower is trying to make the most of the new year, but will it stick? Chad Zumock does another walk and talk stream where he reveals how much his loyal fans really mean to him. Plus we check in on some of our favorite nuts in the NLO goof troupe!

    22 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 4 hours 58 minutes
    January 20, 2026: Kevin Brennan Provides LOLs! KarmicX MISERY Continues! Kitty Pineapple Is Back!

    KarmicX is living at Felicia Gillespie’s place again, because he can’t be alone with his own thoughts in the frozen Minnesota north. But it doesn’t seem like he is finding peace and happiness in his newfound old relationship, and the cracks are already forming in this simple man’s facade. Kevin Brennan doesn’t understand anything, and the meltdowns lately have been amazing. Watch as dementia-adjacent KB continues his crash outs for all to watch. Kitty Pineapple, one of the belles of the Las Vegas comedy ball, is back making content and laughs for us to dig in to.

    20 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 4 hours 32 minutes
    January 15, 2026: Chad Zumock Has NO IDEAS! DonkeyLips Is In NEW YEAR Mode! LOLCOW Soup!

    Chad Zumock admits he has no skills and talent while rehashing what went wrong with his life, but still blames other people for his shortcomings. Let’s watch Chad learn about the internet in real time as he discovers his very own Pizzagate. Kevin Brennan is still obsessed with the numbers. Michael Ray Bower has a chance to start over, but what does that mean for the once super-successful and beloved child actor? Crazy Joe is still battling demons as he attempts to get his show off the ground eleven years after we found him. Karmic explains his 90-day probation plan with Felicia Gillespie. This time it’s gonna go great!

    15 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 5 hours 5 minutes
    January 13, 2026: Kiki Gets Cheeky! Kevin Brennan’s NUMBERS Haunt Him! Broken Bone Therapy!

    Kevin Brennan is living the dream. Sure, his Patreon numbers are down, but he’s not going to let that bother him. As a matter of fact, he’s playing a joke on all of us because he’s making up the money elsewhere. Don’t worry about him. He’s doing fine. You’re all just Melton trolls, anyway. Keanu Thompson may be growing tired of her husband as he inches towards sixty years old, constantly gets drunk on stream and embarrasses himself, and can’t stop repeating his broken-brain chants about a flu and dragging her in to his fights. Is the honeymoon over?

    13 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 5 hours 11 minutes
    January 12, 2026: Chad Zumock The HYPOCRITE! Ashley Cummings Stinks! Steel Toe PIVOTS On ICE!

    Chad Zumock spent another weekend drunk in the tiny apartment he claims is only a temporary housing situation. Watch as he tries to confront Scarlett about her issues while his daddy Kevin uses her for chuckles. Ashley Cummings needs the Dabbleverse even though she claims to be tired of it. She can’t cash her $20 checks fast enough! Aaron Imholte leaves his basement and gets more views than ever while prancing around St. Cloud and pretending to not be a racist!

    12 January 2026, 6:43 pm
  • 3 hours 31 minutes
    THIS LITTLE PIGGY: A Steel Toe Morning Show Roundtable Discussion (January 9, 2026)

    With the lowest numbers he’s ever had, and hypocrisy galore, things just keep getting better for Steel Toe! Join Patrick, Karl from WATP, and Moody as they discuss the hilarity of the week from Aaron Imholte and his Steel Toe Morning Show. The man who refuses to get a job never ceases to captivate while ratcheting up his lies and sperg-sessions for our amusement.

    9 January 2026, 6:43 pm
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