Free-Ass. Press Podcast

Free-Ass. Press

The New York Times called Free-Ass. Press "the fake news site whose name cannot be repeated here," and has listed it among the best comedy of the day alongside Jay Leno, David Letterman and The Onion.

  • 1 minute 9 seconds
    Oprah Gains Weight Eating Her Own Ratings
    Oprah Winfrey, the daytime queen of talk and weight loss minus the weight loss, has gained the weight back again.
    20 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute 1 second
    TV Goes Digital; Playboy Channel Still Fuzzy
    14-year-old boys all over America are outraged that the Playboy channel still comes in fuzzy.
    18 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute 5 seconds
    Optimists File For Chapter 11 Bankruptcy
    Optimist International, commonly known as the Optimists, has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.
    16 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute 12 seconds
    State-of-the-Art Presidential Limo Boasts a Top Speed of 3
    GM unveiled its largest, heaviest, most-polluting, least fuel-efficient vehicle ever to hit American roadways.
    13 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute
    Condi Rice Publishes Memoir:
    Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has announced the publication of her new tell-all memoir, "I'm Black Too, Ya Know!"
    11 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute
    Afghanistan Cancels "Take Your Child To Work" Day
    "Take Your Child To Work Day" has been canceled in Afghanistan due to weather. For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    9 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 48 seconds
    Obama Cancels Black History Month
    In yet another sign of the continuing economic crisis, President Barack Obama has canceled Black History Month for lack of funds. For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    6 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute 3 seconds
    VP Biden's Schedule Packed With Meaningless Busy Work
    VP Biden's schedule is so packed with meaningless busywork that he is having trouble keeping up. For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    4 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 57 seconds
    Jimmy John’s Now Charging For Free Smells
    In another sign of the deepening economic recession Jimmy John's, the beloved sub sandwich shop that used to offer "Free Smells," will start charging $1 for them effective immediately. For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    2 February 2009, 11:00 am
  • 58 seconds
    Astronauts Hardest Hit By High Gas Prices
    With fuel prices in the U.S. now averaging four dollars per gallon, no one has been harder hit than NASA astronauts. To lessen that impact, NASA has announced that it will now allow its non-essential astronauts to telecommute. For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    30 January 2009, 11:00 am
  • 1 minute 6 seconds
    Study: 70% of American Dental Association Employees Have F***ed Up Teeth
    According to a new study by the Center for Popular Hypocrisy, 70 percent of American Dental Association workers have "f***ed-up teeth." For these stories and more, go to www.freeasspress.com.
    29 January 2009, 11:00 am
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