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When we look at the love of Christ, we make a wonderful discovery: love is more a decision than an emotion.

Christ-like love applauds good behavior. At the same time, Christ-like love refuses to endorse misbehavior. Jesus loved his apostles, but he wasn’t silent when they were faithless. Jesus loved the people in the temple, but he didn’t sit still when they were hypocritical. Love does whatever is in the best interest of a person. The cheating husband says to his wife, “If you loved me, you’d forget what has happened and let me come home.” That may not be true. Love does what’s in the best interest of a person. Love sets boundaries. Love seeks counsel.

The love of Christ is no sweet sentiment, but rather a heartfelt resolve to do what’s in the best interest of another person. And sometimes that means dying on a cross.

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Vengeance fixes your attention on life’s ugliest moments. Score settling freezes your stare at cruel events in your past. Is that where you want to look?

Will rehearsing and reliving your hurts make you a better person? By no means – it will destroy you. Revenge moves God away from the equation. It replaces God. I’m not sure you can handle this one, Lord. You may punish too little or too slowly.  I’ll take this matter into my hands. So God reminds us in Romans 12:19, “I’ll do the judging. I’ll take care of it” (my paraphrase).

Only God assesses accurate judgments. Vengeance is his job. Leave your enemies in God’s hands. Forgiveness is not endorsement of misbehavior. You can hate what someone did without letting hatred consume you.

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You’ve been hurt. Part of you is broken, the other part is bitter. Part of you wants to cry, part of you wants to fight. And you’re left with a decision. Do I get over it or get even? Do I release it or resent it?

Resentment is when you allow what’s eating you to eat you up. Revenge is the raging fire that consumes the arsonist. Bitterness the trap that snares the hunter. And mercy is the choice that can set them all free.

“Blessed are the merciful,” Jesus said on the mountain. “They shall be shown mercy” (Matthew 5:7 NIV). Forgiving others allows us to see how God has forgiven us. The dynamic of giving grace is the key to understanding grace, for it is when we forgive others that we begin to feel what God feels. Set your enemy—and yourself—free.

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The fear-filled cannot love deeply. They cannot give to the poor; benevolence has no guarantee of a return. They cannot dream wildly; what if their dreams sputter and fall from the sky? Fear paralyzes people.

Are you afraid? Afraid of a job loss? Afraid of what people are saying about you? Jesus wages such a war against fear. In Matthew 10:28 (NIV) he says, “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul.” In John 14:27 (NIV) Jesus says, “Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”

Fear’s main goal is to keep you from God’s plan for your life. Don’t allow it to win! Punch fear in the face! If anything should be afraid, it should be fear itself.

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I wonder what formed the Grand Canyon? Maybe a few drips here and there. Slowly more and more water built up. Then thunderstorms and lightning. Angry expressions from the sky spilling out in the raging river of the Colorado. A once innocent stream now full of power and purpose. As the years go by, the crevasse is dug.

Our anger builds like the Colorado. Slowly, small things drip, drip, drip down, annoying, irritating, finally enraging. That was mine! Drip. Get out of my way! Drip. Don’t tell me what to do! Drip. The pressure and the buildup unleashing a frenzy of anger, pouring out in our words, sweeping away our loved ones, our homes, and our peace.

Don’t wait until you have a gushing fire hydrant. Go after the small drips. Address every little irritant with forgiveness and prayer. Do it before your anger digs a canyon in your life.

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“We know that in everything God works for the good of those who love him.” Romans 8:28 is one of the most helpful, comforting verses of the entire Bible, announcing God’s sovereignty in any painful, tragic situation we face. God works. Paul’s word for this is sunergeo—the great-great-grandfather of the term synergy. Paul is saying that God can make all things sunergeo for the good. Blending faith with the failings, triumphs with the tears.

James makes the same point in James 1:2 when he says, “Count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” God is working…for our good!

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God uses our struggles for his glory. The last three years of my dad’s life were scarred by ALS. The disease took him from being a healthy mechanic to being a bed-bound paralytic. He lost his voice and his muscles, but he never lost his faith. Visitors noticed. Not so much in what he said, but more in what he didn’t say. Never outwardly angry or bitter, Jack Lucado suffered with dignity. His faith led one man to seek a like faith. This man sought me out and told me. Because of my dad’s example, he became a Jesus follower.

Did God orchestrate my father’s illness for that very reason? Knowing the value God places on one soul, I wouldn’t be surprised. And imagining the splendor of heaven, I know my father is not complaining. A season of suffering is a small assignment when compared to the great reward!

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My college roommate, Steve, was neat. Not just neat in the sense of a lot of fun, but neat in the sense of not sloppy. I, on the other hand, tend to be sloppy. Why make up a bed you’re going to sleep in that night? Steve was very gracious. Little by little he helped me change. I learned the purpose of hangers, the reason for toothpaste lids. Our four years of rooming together were four years of regular repentance. Then he turned me over to Denalyn, and she’s still working on me.

The same thing happens to Christians. As Christ moves in and takes up residence in his life, the Christian sees how sloppy he is. Over time, his language changes. His habits change. He lives a lifestyle of repentance. The longer we hang out with Jesus, the more we see what needs to change. Repentance becomes a lifestyle!

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If God chose only righteous people to change the world, you could count them all on one finger—Jesus! Instead he included others in his plan—sinners, the ungodly, the imperfect. God used and uses people to change the world. People! Crooks, creeps, lovers, and liars—he uses them all! If you ever wonder how God can use you to make a difference in your world, just look at those he has already used, and take heart.

No matter who you are or what you’ve done, God can use you. Because you’re imperfect, you can speak of making mistakes. Because you’re a sinner, you can speak of forgiveness. God restores the broken and the brittle, then parades them before the world as trophies of his love and strength. And when the world sees the ungodly turn godly, they know God must love them too. God can use you, my friend.

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Impatience is selfishness with time. We don’t like to waste it. People get in our way and slow things down, so we burn them with impatience!

Patience recognizes that we share time with others; it’s not just our time. Patience knows other factors are at work—that some things can be sped up with encouragement, not flames of retribution. The best way to turn down the flame of impatience is with love.

“Love is patient.” Love is a fruit hanging from the tree of Galatians 5:22. It’s the first-fruit, and some say the most important. The seeds of love produce the harvest of all the other fruits: joy, peace, patience… So if you have the Holy Spirit, then you have the potential of making patience a part of your life. Thankfully, God is patient while you find that patience.

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