Vanilla. Straight. Cis. Monogamous. How could this story possibly be sexy?
A monogamous couple tried a dual massage in a foreign country. Mirrors on the ceiling. Pillows on the bed. Jacuzzi. Steam room. At first they wondered if they were allowed to have sex.

They were.

Hear the tale!

If you have a story you think everyone should hear, write it up and send it in to [email protected].

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

When does subbing morph into self-harm? The relationship between a man and his much younger trans woman lover involves intense physical abuse. The girl has a wretched history, and engages in self harm. Although she gives consent, there's also a language barrier that makes everything they do seem out of control and destructive.

A bisexual woman took the plunge and came out to her conservative Catholic mother. Although her mother didn't completely melt down, she has a ways to go before she reaches acceptance. What will it take to move her mother into the light?

Our guest this week is Intimacy Coordinator Yehuda Duenyas. He and Dan talk about what an Intimacy Coordinator does, and whether they should be required on a movie set. How a director's prompt can sometimes be as vague as "They Have Sex" and it's up to the IC to flesh out how that should look to the audience. How portraying scenes of abuse can be wrenching for sensitive male actors. And of course, Dan has Yehuda answer a couple of sex questions too. A little of this conversation is on the Micro and the whole thing is on the Magnum.

Finally, is it possible for a man to both come and pee at the same time...in his girlfriend's mouth? Sadly, this is not a theoretical question.

Ask Dan ANY kind of question.

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now,  get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, media darling and creator of the It Gets Better Project. A tireless advocate for ethical conduct within relationships, queer rights, and sexual freedom with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage is a cultural force for sex positivity, when we most need it.

They designed, engineered and built their own fuck box. Dan's question: "So did you upholster it?"

Hear all about it, how it fit into the sex party and whether they enjoyed it or not.

Do YOU have a perverted tale to tell? Write it up and send it in to [email protected].

A 60 year old woman wonders where she can score some poppers.

A lesbian would like to score a queer dominatrix to work her over.

On the Magnum, Dan chats with Rich Juzwiak of Slate's love and sex advice column, "How to Do It." They talk about how to make anal sex pleasurable when your partner is very, very, (some might even say "too") well endowed. How too many sex partners can be dangerous. And they discuss age gap relationships: are we are in an age of peak daddy?

And, a woman's boyfriend complains that his wiener slips out during sex because she is "too wet."

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is sponsored by Sundays for Dogs- Dog food using the same ingredients and care you’d use to cook for yourself and your family. Go to sundaysfordogs.com/SAVAGE50 and get 50% off your first order. Or, you can use code SAVAGE50 at checkout.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A woman wanted to try out her dollification kink. So, she and her butch girlfriend went to a lesbian sex party. You may be wondering what do they do to dolls at lesbian sex parties.

Listen, and find out.

Did you have a wild night recently?

Write us at [email protected].

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

A concerned listener asks "Where's the lube?"-specifically about movie scenes showing gay sex.

A woman in a red state makes it clear in her dating profiles that she is a leftie. She attracts men who claim to be moderate, but are really stealth MAGA creeps. Why do they do this? Why?!

Our Magnum guest is the effervescent internationally renowned human sexuality professor, author, and speaker Dr. Nicole McNichols. In her very popular Diversity of Sexuality class, she gets tied up and whipped as part of a lecture on communication and consent. So. She and Dan talk about the difference between bad sex and traumatic sex. They also dig into the data on why young people are having less sex these days.

And, hear the sad tale of a man who was dumped by both his wife AND his goddess.

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Mill, odorless, effortless, fully automated food recycler. Try Mill risk-free for 90 days and get $75 off at Mill.com/Savage and use code Savage at checkout.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, beard-hater and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From bondage to bisexuality, cuckolding to crossdressing and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage is a cultural force for sex positivity, when we most need it.

Right after her ketamine infusion, she ran home as fast as should could.

And then her boyfriend got busy...

Have YOU ever seen the face of a lynx in the sky? Didn't think so.

Have a sordid, sexy, weird, funny or freaky tale to tell? We are listening...

Write it up and send it in to [email protected]

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit ⁠VB.Health⁠ when you use the code Savage.

You poor, poor people. For Valentine's Day this year, we're going dark and airing some of your most unpleasant break-up stories. Like the woman who learned her husband was cheating on her when she saw the tattoo he got of the other woman's initials on his leg. That sort of thing. You'll hear a few of these stories on the Micro and more on the Magnum.

Meanwhile, a married man sneezes uncontrollably after he comes. Why?! Make it stop!

A woman begs every man, everywhere to shave his beard.

Our Magnum guest is the delightful Adam Zmith- author of Deep Sniff: A History of Poppers Queer Futures. He has recommendations for popper brands and...flavors. Anybody up for some pumpkin spice poppers?

And, how soon is too soon to ask your boyfriend to get a vasectomy?

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

Beducated brings pleasure-based sex education right to your bedroom. Kick off your best sex life with Beducated’s awesome, five-minute quiz at https://beducate.me/pd2607-savage.

Some might consider Daniel a very lucky man. He brought one of his 4 girlfriends to a sex party where the men wore tuxedos and the women wore...nothing at all.

Oh, and it was a Christmas party.

Hear all about it.

If you did something totally bonkers and want to tell the wide world about it, write it up and send it in to [email protected] with the subject line: After Action Report

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

Dan interviews, argues and politely spars with gay evangelical Christian Matthew Vines, author of "God and the Gay Christian." Vines, who is married to his husband since 2022, was a potent advocate for gay marriage. Now he and Dan have a debate about the role of monogamy in gay life and society in general.

They both take the gloves off, and somehow remain friends at the end of this long conversation. We are releasing about 20 minutes of it on the Micro version, and the whole thing is on the Magnum, available by subscription at Savage.Love.

Check out Matthews book God and the Gay Christian, and his talk on monogamy at The Reformation Project's 2025 Reconcile & Reform Conference.

Yip! Yap! Bite! A woman's little, nasty, needy dogs are anything but "comfort animals" and her girlfriend isn't having it. She refuses to move in with the caller while those tiny beasts are around. Are they fundamentally incompatible?

A British woman learned that her husband had sexual experiences with other boys at his British boarding school. She never knew this and finds it shocking. Dan brings on the sexiest survivor of boarding schools that we know- porn star John Thomas. Let John's amazing voice take you on a journey examining situational homosexuality at British boarding schools.

And on the Magnum, a man with blood cancer has an enlarged spleen. He's worried that anal sex might cause him harm. Dan brings on anal surgeon Dr. Evan Goldstein to talk about risks, and how sex toys can rearrange your guts...safely.

And a woman who is learning about gay intimacy for the first time through "Heated Rivalry" wonders if homo sex goes as fast as it does on the tee-vee.

[email protected] 206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now,  get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage

This episode is brought to you by VB Health, Doctor-formulated supplements that work . To learn more about Load Boost, Drive Boost and Soaking Wet and to get 10% off, visit VB.Health when you use the code Savage.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.