Join Lou Paoletti and Michael Malone as they embark on a humorous journey of self-discovery while unpacking their weekly therapy sessions. From navigating grief and anxiety to embracing ADHD quirks, Secondhand Therapy is a funny, heartfelt podcast that brings laughter and meaning to life’s toughest challenges. Merch available at http://secondhandtherapypod.com Full video episodes on YouTube! http://youtube.com/@secondhandtherapypod Follow us on TikTok: @secondhandtherapypod Follow us on Instagram: @secondhandtherapypod Contact us: [email protected]
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
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What happens when you realize you don’t actually know your parents as people?
In this episode, we talk about the moment adulthood hits and you suddenly see your mom as a human instead of just “Mom.” We get into parent–child relationships, emotional maturity, grief, family dynamics, divorce, childhood memories, and why so many adults feel regret about not asking their parents deeper questions sooner.
We share the emotional experience of trying to intentionally connect with a parent, what changes as parents age, how becoming a grandparent can shift emotional openness, and the complicated feelings that come with realizing your parents had full lives before you.
We also talk about:
Losing a parent and the regret of never truly knowing them
How childhood shapes your adult relationships
Therapy concepts like reframing, empathy, and emotional growth
How grief and healing change family relationships
The psychology of seeing your parents differently as an adult
If you’ve ever wondered:
Why don’t we really know our parents?
Why does time with family feel more meaningful as we get older?
Why do adult children start asking deeper questions later in life?
This episode is for you.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
_____
Why do we sabotage ourselves right when life is going well? In this deeply honest and funny episode, we talk about self-sabotage, burnout, body image, ADHD overwhelm, emotional contagion, perfectionism, and the fear of slowing down.
One host opens up about gaining weight and the shame spiral that followed, while the other calls out the real culprit: feeling defeated before even trying. From driving to Costco and leaving with In-N-Out instead of groceries, to the exhausting pressure of productivity and the inability to truly rest, this episode dives into the psychology of why change feels impossible when you’re already overwhelmed.
We also explore:
• Why burnout kills motivation
• The hidden link between shame and self-sabotage
• The pressure to always be “productive”
• Why we struggle to feel content or fulfilled
• Emotional contagion and childhood emotional patterns
• The fear of stopping, slowing down, or “not running” anymore
This episode blends mental health, comedy, therapy insights, and real conversations about anxiety, depression, motivation, and personal growth.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, exhausted, or like you’re getting in your own way — this one will hit hard (and make you laugh).
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
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What happens when childhood trauma meets therapy, neuroscience, and personal growth?
In this episode, we sit down with David Sussillo, a tech leader and author who grew up in foster care, group homes, and institutional living to explore how early adversity shapes the brain, emotional regulation, confidence, and adult success. Together, we unpack the psychology of trauma, resilience, and the long-term impact of feeling unsafe as a child.
We talk about:
• Growing up in foster care and surviving a turbulent childhood
• How trauma affects curiosity, intelligence, and risk-taking
• Emotional regulation, anger, anxiety, and relationship patterns
• Therapy, meditation, and learning to “observe” your thoughts
• Addiction, family history, and breaking generational cycles
• Religion, meaning, and the fear of nothing after death
• Neuroscience, AI, and what makes humans conscious
This conversation blends mental health, psychology, neuroscience, and real lived experience to answer a big question: Can trauma hold you back—or help you grow?
If you’re interested in therapy, healing, self-awareness, personal growth, childhood trauma, anxiety, depression, resilience, and the science of the mind, this episode is for you.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
-Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
-BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
-Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
_____
Why are some people afraid to be happy? In this episode, we unpack the fear of happiness, losing your identity, and why suffering can feel tied to purpose. We talk about loneliness, the “sad identity,” and the belief that being happy makes you less relatable or useful to others.
We dive into emotional immaturity, childhood conditioning, emotionally immature parents, gaslighting vs lying, codependency, people-pleasing, and the urge to help or control others. We explore how trauma, family dynamics, and early experiences shape your self-concept, relationships, and sense of worth.
If you struggle with feeling undeserving of happiness, fear being seen as “better than others,” or feel stuck in a helper role, this conversation will feel deeply relatable.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
_____
Why do we people-please? Why is having opinions so scary? And why do old memories and regrets stay with us for life?
This episode dives deep into people pleasing, fear of abandonment, identity, childhood emotional development, and the pressure of expectations. We talk about why we struggle to disappoint others, why external validation feels safer than authenticity, and how regret and unresolved memories shape adulthood.
We also unpack a short story about childhood friendship, curiosity, sexuality, nostalgia, and the emotional weight we carry from growing up.
Topics include:
• people pleasing & fawning response
• fear of abandonment
• identity & self-worth
• regret & shame
• childhood emotional development
• nostalgia & memory
• masculinity & emotional expression
• therapy & personal growth
If you’ve ever struggled to say no, feared disappointing others, or wondered who you really are — this episode is for you.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
_____
In this episode of Secondhand Therapy, we dive into dopamine detox, phone addiction, and what happens when you remove distractions from your life. One host quits his smartphone, switches to a Light Phone, ditches Bluetooth, and starts living with extreme intention—only to realize it’s way harder (and more uncomfortable) than expected.
We talk about doomscrolling, online shopping addiction, constant comparison, and the feeling of always searching for something you can’t define. Is modern technology making us anxious, disconnected, and unhappy?
We also get into family dynamics, political tension, overthinking, and the struggle with self-worth—especially when you assume people are judging you. Why do we spiral about what others think? And how do you stop?
This episode is about slowing down, being present, and learning how to sit with discomfort instead of escaping it.
Topics include:
If you’ve ever felt addicted to your phone, stuck in your thoughts, or unsure if you’re growing or just spiraling—this one’s for you.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
ADHD burnout, perfectionism, EMDR therapy, anxiety, and deciding when you're ready to share your story.
_____
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
_____
ADHD, executive dysfunction, EMDR therapy, anxiety, and healing after relationships — this episode dives deep into the messy reality of mental health recovery.
Michael opens up about living with ADHD, the pressure of rigid routines, executive dysfunction burnout, and the exhausting cycle of all-or-nothing thinking, perfectionism, and chasing the ideal self. He shares how ADHD impacts productivity, identity, motivation, and emotional regulation.
Lou reflects on recent EMDR therapy sessions while processing a past relationship and the emotional residue left behind. He discusses anxiety, avoidance, emotional numbness, and the fear that comes with telling deeply personal stories. The conversation explores vulnerability, trauma processing, therapy breakthroughs, and deciding when you're ready to share your truth.
This episode is for anyone navigating ADHD overwhelm, therapy healing, relationship grief, anxiety recovery, perfectionism, and personal growth.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
We called a psychic medium to talk to our dead loved ones… and it got real.
_____
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
____
In this episode of Secondhand Therapy, we share what happened when we called a psychic medium to see if we could speak to our deceased loved ones.
What started as skepticism turned into an emotional experience neither of us expected. One of us connected with his mother who passed away 10 years ago. The other spoke about a deceased ex-partner and unresolved guilt. We talk about grief, survivor’s guilt, regret, emotional numbness, and what it means to feel like nobody needs you.
Is talking to a psychic real? Are medium readings legit? Or is it just cold reading and coincidence? We break down what felt accurate, what didn’t, and how it stirred up deeper conversations about therapy, closure, depression, burnout, suicidal ideation, and self-abandonment.
We also explore:
Guilt about your last conversation with a parent
Feeling disconnected after loss
Numbing with work or substances
The pressure to be needed
The realization that maybe the person who needs you most… is you
If you’ve ever lost a parent, struggled with grief, wondered about psychics or mediums, or felt like no one would notice if you disappeared, this episode is for you.
Disclaimer: We are not therapists. This is not professional advice.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Codependency, people-pleasing, and losing yourself in love — how to break the cycle and build real intimacy.
_____
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
______
Why do we lose ourselves in relationships, chase validation, and confuse caretaking with love?
This week we sit down with Ken to unpack the reality of codependency — from people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, and attachment anxiety to the addiction of needing validation from partners. We talk CoDA meetings, self-worth, intimacy avoidance, honesty in relationships, and the uncomfortable process of learning boundaries without losing compassion.
If you’ve ever felt responsible for fixing your partner, struggled to express needs, or stayed in unhealthy dynamics out of fear of abandonment, this episode will hit hard.
We also get into:
• why codependent people struggle with identity
• the difference between love and emotional dependency
• learning to stop controlling outcomes and tolerate discomfort
• how honesty builds real intimacy (even when it’s terrifying)
• breaking the cycle of choosing “projects” instead of partners
This is a vulnerable, funny, and deeply honest conversation about recovery, relationships, and learning to finally choose yourself.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
Exploring dry drunk behavior, earned love, and why misery can feel safer than happiness.
_____
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
Psychic Source:
Go to our sponsor https://trypsychicsource.com/sht10 and use our code sht10 to try up to 40 minutes with an advisor for just $19.80. That is up to a $240 value!
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
Southern New Hampshire University:
Go to https://snhu.edu/sht to explore over 200 degree programs and find your path forward. #sponsored
______
In this episode, we unpack the uncomfortable idea of being a “dry drunk” — not addicted to substances, but addicted to behaviors, control, and emotional suffering.
What starts as a conversation about sobriety quickly turns into something deeper: the fear that happiness isn’t real, the belief that love must be earned, and the quiet ways self-worth gets shaped by childhood experiences.
We talk about feeling stuck in survival mode, struggling to accept love without performing for it, and why misery can feel safer than healing. From identity confusion to self-neglect, people-pleasing, and the anxiety of being perceived, this episode explores the internal battles that don’t always look dramatic from the outside — but feel overwhelming on the inside.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re self-aware but still trapped in the same patterns… this conversation will hit close to home.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks
If the world ended in 14 days, who would you choose — and why are you scared to choose anyone?
Support the pod:
PATREON - http://patreon.com/secondhandtherapypod
MERCH - http://secondhandtherapypod.com
BetterHelp:
If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our sponsor. Visit https://betterhelp.com/secondhandtherapy for a discount on your first month of therapy. #sponsored
If you have questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are credentialed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation, here is an overview written by the YouTube creators behind the channel Cinema Therapy that goes into these topics: https://www.reddit.com/r/cinema_therapy/comments/1dpriql/addressing_the_betterhelp_concerns_headon_deep/
The Maca Team:
Louie really does take Maca every day. (He takes Black and Tri-Blend). He loves it.
http://themacateam.com/secondhandtherapy
promo code: bearcub for 10% off
Light Phone:
Louie really does have and use a Light Phone III. He loves it.
https://www.thelightphone.com/shop?ref=mmexymn
promo code: secondhandtherapy for $50 off pre-order of Light Phone III
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What would you do if the world was ending in 14 days?
This week on Secondhand Therapy, we break down Seeking a Friend for the End of the World through a therapy lens — and it gets personal fast. We talk about attachment styles, fear of abandonment, self-sabotage, purpose, loneliness, and the urge to unblock your ex when mortality hits.
Would you numb out with chaos… or search for connection?
Would you end it with family, your partner, or alone?
And why does control feel safer than vulnerability?
This episode dives into:
Anxious vs avoidant attachment
Preemptive abandonment
Fear of being “too much”
Existential anxiety & meaning
Why we sabotage love before it can hurt us
It’s funny. It’s uncomfortable. It’s deeply honest.
If the clock were ticking — who would you choose?
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: [email protected]
Follow us here:
http://instagram.com/secondhandtherapypod
http://tiktok.com/@secondhandtherapypod
Contact us:
[email protected]
818-850-2448
PO BOX 230595, Las Vegas, NV 89105
Cover Art Design: Louie Paoletti
Theme Music: Jamie Franks