Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Hi, Scarlet. God, this is trippy. I guess I'm talking to Red, too, because. Well, I don't know what you all can hear of what I'm hearing, but, Red, if you can hear me. A person? Well, a person that sounded just like you reached out and says their name is Scarlet, or that's a pseudonym that they chose because of you. Well, now I don't know who I'm talking to. Two different versions of the same person speaking to me from two distinct universes. Both universes sound tough. And lonely. But universes in which the two of you have taken very different paths, had very different lives and experiences. 

I think about her all the time. The other me. Well, all of the other me's. What are they doing? What lives are they living? In how many universes are they already dead? In how many universes are there accompanying Harry's keeping all of those Whiskey's company. In how many universes are those Harry's driving all of those Whiskeys completely insane and vice versa? 

I shouldn't say that. Things have been a little better lately. The arguments fewer and farther between, but...I don't know. Now we're at the point where things are just aimless. We settled into a rhythm. For a while there, you know, in Pennsylvania. And then obviously the year I was gone...well. That was aimless in its own way, but the driving without a destination in mind was kind of the point. But I don't- I don't think we're ready to settle back down. 

But we need to do something. We can't just keep moving from place to place without any destination in mind or without any purpose. Harry really needs a purpose and we've gotten good at the staying alive bit that that's not going to keep her occupied for long. I'm not going to keep her occupied for long, I- 

How do you keep a brain active when you only hear one voice? Scarlet, you said that you've only been hearing your own voice for the last seven years, and I can't even imagine what that's like. Just having Harry to talk to - just one other person to talk to - it's not that we've...I haven't gotten sick of her. I worry sometimes that I'm not interesting enough for her, but. I don't know. 

Even with what we are to each other now, with what we're trying to be to each other, that hunger to find more people...it's still there. I think she feels it too. She doesn't want to admit it because she doesn't want to admit that she spent seven years cooped up in that house with me, begging me not to leave for nothing, but... 

We can't change the past as much as we might want to. And there's no way of knowing who else might be out there. I'm really glad, Scarlet, to have broken the silence for you, to have brought color into the life of your counterpart and I don't know, maybe brightened some other sense of some other you somewhere, but is that enough? Don't you want to find someone? Have you tried looking--? Sorry. Bad choice of words. I just mean...are you certain that you're alone? 

Because we weren't. Junior and Donnie have been out there this whole time and...I've tried- I've tried reaching out to Birdie again. I even called out for Fox a few times. You may have heard it. I don't know, but having some kind of guidance, having some kind of direction to go in, it was...well, it was really frustrating, but it was also helpful. And Birdie, they said something had changed, that they couldn't see the path clearly any more, that the timeline we were in was different than the timeline we started in and I-- 

Nothing's different. Nothing is different and I don't know if I'm terrified of finding out what's changed or if I'm dying to know. 

What would you do, Scarlet? If you could change your world, press a button saying that things would be different, but you didn't know in which direction, would you do it? Or would you choose to keep things the same even if it's not quite enough? It's still safe. Would that be better?

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Hello, Whiskey. My voice might sound somewhat familiar. And I suppose it is, but at the same time… it really isn’t. You received a message from someone calling themselves ‘Red’, and that’s… there’s no other way to say it, but that’s MY voice. I would know it anywhere. It’s all I’ve heard for these past seven years, except for your transmissions, and the occasional stray advert on the airwaves. And when I first heard it, I honestly thought I was going crazy. Thought maybe I’d sent a transmission without even realizing it. It… wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility. I mean I do talk to myself, so that’s probably a sign of something, right? But then… this… Red, this other version of me, she started talking about white walls, and painting them, and colour, and rainbows, and that… Well, that made it clear that it wasn’t me. Not unless I’d gone completely crazy. 

See… (laughs) ’See’… I’ve never seen the walls in this place. I’ve never seen the walls in any place. I don’t know what shade of green money is. I don’t know what the sun looks like. I can tell you what the heat of it feels like on my skin, or the smell of a five-dollar bill, and I know every single bump and dent and bit of texture on the walls of my home… but I’ve never seen them. I’ve never seen any of them. I’ve been blind my entire life. Or… at least as long as I can remember. I won’t get into the… medical details, it’s not like I was in a position to understand them at the time. An infection, a bad fever, that’s all I really know. I certainly don’t envy my parents for what they went through, let’s just put it that way.

So… you couldn’t bring colour back into my life, though I appreciate the sentiment. There’s just never been any there to begin with. I know some people do get lucky – such as that luck is - get to see shapes, or shadows, or pinholes of vision… I wasn’t lucky, I guess. Story of my life.

But I am lucky to be here, I suppose. Beats the alternative. And wherever Red is, it sounds like she’s somewhere similar. And… probably pretty lonely. I know that feeling well. The… desolation, the hopelessness. The silence. So… thank you for breaking the silence, at least, Whiskey. I’m very grateful for that.

And Red… if you’re out there, somewhere, able to hear this… I don’t even know how you would reach out, or how I would hear it, or if that would… destroy time and space or something, but just… I’m here. I’m here if you need someone. I’ve… become very well-versed in talking to myself. You’re… you used a pseudonym for a reason, and I suppose I should follow suit. Don’t want them tracking me down, after all of this. So… if anyone wants to reach out, whether it’s Whiskey, or Red, or… some other alternate version of me… you can call me Scarlet.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Breaker, breaker. This is Whiskey calling out to our dog attack victim. 

Um, I hope you're okay. I'm sorry that happened. I'm glad that you're already on the journey to heal. And I do wish you a lot of luck. I want to say, I think it's amazing that that was your reaction. To want to turn around and pet the head the bit you. I

've always loved dogs, but at the end of the day, they are just animals that live in our homes. And you're right, what good is a world without them? But...sure, we domesticated dogs over millennia, but they still have sharp teeth. They still have an instinct that I'm not sure it can be entirely bred out. And I'm sorry that you were a victim of that. 

I would love a dog to curl up with. To take care of. And to understand myself a little bit more, because sometimes I feel a little bit like that. Like there's something in me that can't be bred out, can't be trained out. That when cornered, I'm just a thing with sharp teeth. 

[click, static]

Harry would be the first to tell you that I bite. She's not talking to me at the moment, and for good reason. Um...that snarling, rabid snap of teeth that has always perched just beneath my soft palate came out the other day, and...well, she was in range. 

[click, static]

It was after...well, I was having another one of those dark days. Thinking about Don, just swallowed in grief and guilt. And she wasn't- she wasn't being a pill about it or anything, but she wasn't exactly being comforting and...not that I expect that from her. She's never been great at that. But I think I just needed her to mostly leave me alone if she wasn't going to be comforting. And she wouldn't. And I snapped. 

I just...I told her it was her fault. It was her fault that I left and found him in the first place. It was her fault that I wasn't there when it happened. And it was her fault that we're in this situation to begin with. Even though I know- I know that it's technically literally the fault of my actions. But still she set us on the path. And that's- 

[click, static]

I'm worried that we're never going to stop having this argument. And that's...you know, in the very foundation of our relationship is having the same argument over and over again, but we've gotten better at it. You know, we've gotten better at fighting with each other. We can hurt more precisely now. Cut deeper with fewer slashes and it's...I wasn't nice about it and she's right to not be talking to me because she lost him, too and we both took actions to protect one another that led us to where we are now, so there's no point in placing blame for Don's death at anyone else's feet other than Junior's. 

It's his fault. He's the one who did it. But we can't confront him. We can't jail him. We certainly can't kill him. And so we're left with only each other to sling arrows at. 

[click, static]

And I'm tired of it. I'm tired of. Lashing out when I feel cornered. I'm tired of caring about the blame. I'm tired of wanting to try and fix what can't be fixed. But I don't know how to stop any of it. I don't know how to train myself out of those animalistic impulses to tear out someone's throat. And part of me wonders if I did it, if I succeeded and was able to change that part of me so fundamentally, would there be enough of me in what was left? Is a dog still a dog if you remove all of its teeth?

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Another message from another person out there in the black. You said:

I thought it was so sad that you only saw one dog on you journey. What good is a world without dogs? Then last weekend I was shocked and heartbroken by being attacked by a large dog that the owner had said was friendly and loved everyone (owner is shocked and heartbroken,  too). So now I'm on a journey to heal, trust, and learn more about that which I thought I loved...just like Whiskey. It'll be a somewhat lonely journey, like hers, and filled with ALL of the emotions. I'm hoping it ends with belly rubs, chewed furniture legs, piddle accidents, full vacuum tanks, five am wake-ups,  and an unshakable bond. Wish me luck.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Breaker, breaker, this is Whiskey calling out for Herm. Hi, Herm. It's good to meet you. Good to hear from you. Good to hear from anyone, really. We've left the place that we were--coming down the mountain--and we've been moving around a little. So I haven't been on the radio as much as I would like. I'm also a little unsure how far my radio is reaching. I had the benefit of all of Birdie's equipment up on the mountain. And now, I mean, I think I think I was able to jerry rig something that will work pretty much like Birdie's set up worked, but I don't actually know for certain. 

I'm hoping...I'm hoping we can go back in the spring, but it was just...it would have been dangerous, foolish to stay up there throughout the winter. I mean, it was freezing by the time we left. But anyway, Herm, your timeline. Sounds interesting, this fresh start that you're describing, the fact that you're with people but they don't know who you are. They don't know that you've flipped into a different version of the world. Color me intrigued. 

Is this how all of you have felt whenever I've alluded to something without actually giving much information about it? It's interesting and also frustrating to have just some of the information. I think--I think you're probably right. That I wouldn't have shared the information that I shared if I weren't in the circumstance that I'm in. But I don't regret it. Not just because it allowed me to say a bunch of stuff to Harry that I don't think I would have been able to say to her face and...to maybe say some things to...to Billings' son. If he was listening. If any of that means anything. 

It's not just the freedom of getting to speak to people that I know or people that I have something to say to specifically. I don't regret it because there's something freeing about all of it. There's something to be said for having this audio diary of my life of the past year and change of everything that I've been through. And there's something nice about people reaching out their voices to me as if they were already friends. The fact that I can mean anything to anybody, any stranger is...I mean...humbling. Just like you're experiencing. And it's surreal, but it makes it easier. It makes living in this big, empty world easier. 

Hearing from...from all of you. Some of you are like me. You're alone where you are. But a lot of you-- you're in the timelines that I guess are a bit closer to the one that you left. And I wonder if there are other people out there who don't even realize that they've slipped into a different timeline? I don't know which would be worse, right? I don't know if those people feel that something is off, that something isn't quite right. If it's like the feeling of worrying that you left your stove on, but not being able to go back and check. I don't know if I could live with that feeling every day in my life. Is it better to live in a world where I so obviously don't belong? Because. At least I know it. 

It must be lonely being the only person who knows that you're in a different place. I mean, that's what I'm assuming, based on what you said, but. Yeah. It must be lonely, especially if you have friends, but they're not the ones that you chose. 

I like your cats' names. Mimzi and JubJub are very good names for cats. I never read the Jabberwocky, but that's an Alice in Wonderland thing, right? Lewis Carroll. I think Harry would understand you, though, wanting to have your books. But it's funny. I never really gave much thought these last seven years about who I wish I'd been stuck with. I guess because as much as it was agony so much of the time, I was with the person that I would have chosen. 

I don't...I haven't told her that. You know? I mean, things have been things have been good and getting better all the time, but. There's still that sense that while we're the only two people on Earth, I mean, not actually, but in every way that counts, we're the only two people on earth. So. It's good that we can tolerate each other. It's good that we can express these emotions that we have for each other now, but...I don't know if acknowledging that and being what we are now, I don't I don't know if that counts as telling her that I would have chosen her anyway. That even if we were back in Manhattan, in the life we used to live, I still would have chosen her. 

I think she knows. She's stopped listening to my transmissions, mostly because she's, you know, near me when I make them. And we only have so many radios traveling with us. It was different back on the mountain, but I should probably tell her, right? It's nice to get to say these things first to you. To have you know me in this way, even though I barely know you. I still-- I like having these things just be mine. Just be ours. 

So, thank you, Herm. For saying that I mean a lot to you. And you haven't been intrusive. I have been putting my diary out for the whole world to hear. So, you know, don't worry about it. You're not violating any kind of privacy line. And I'm not sure that there's a point in comparing the experiences. You're allowed to complain however much you want to complain, and if it makes you feel like a child, then I say embrace that. I haven't felt like a child in so long. And. I don't know. Maybe...maybe that'll be a goal of mine. To feel more like a child. All right, Herm. Um. Thanks for...thanks for reaching out. For letting me matter to yo. And you mentioned missing someone. I think Arthur maybe was the name, and I just-- I hope you find them. Whiskey out.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

--

[TRANSCRIPT]

Whiskey. I think if I found out someone had been reading my diary like we've been listening to yours, I'd be terrified. I'd close my eyes and cover my ears and run away to never appear ever again. But I can't think of it like that- intruding. I mean, I can. I'm like 90% sure if your timeline wasn't out to get you, leave you only surviving, you wouldn't share this. Those kinds of things change what's acceptable and what's not. 

That was an awful start. Sorry. Everyone is just used to how I blabber and blabber that I forget to control it sometimes. So. Hello, Whiskey. This timeline of mine comes with...friends in it. It's not a Harry situation, really. But these aren't the people I would choose for an apocalypse. I wouldn't even choose people at all. I would choose my cats, Mimzy and JubJub. I was young and we had just read Jabberwocky for the poetry unit in class, and suddenly there were cats for me to name that day when I got home. And, anyways, Mimsy and JubJub have stupid names, but they're who I would choose. 

And books. I would choose books. I had so many on my shelves that I was planning to read. There's no going back, though. I mean, the only reason I have my cats is because they needed a checkup. Did not happen by the by. That day, it went so weird so fast. It's weird here because nobody knows about me. I got a restart I never wanted, and I can't tell anybody anything. And I miss Arthur and...oh, geez. 

So I'm not alone. We all have to move sometimes. And it feels like a field trip. It's really different from what you experienced. Humbling. Honestly, I kind of feel like a child whenever I complain now. I'm glad you haven't given up, though. I would. Even in this one, I almost did. I... I talked too long. I'm sorry. You don't know, but you mean a lot to me. Because I've been intrusively reading your diary, I suppose, but thank you, Whiskey. I want to hear your voice again soon. I've gotten pretty used to it. 

You can call me Herm. It's something that...It's familiar. If you hear this Whiskey, or anyone else, I suppose. Callooh Callay. And I'm truly hoping that in front of us will be another good day. Herm out.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A response to Passerine.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

----

[TRANSCRIPT]

Breaker breaker. This is whiskey calling out for Passerine. I think-I hope I'm pronouncing that correctly. I read your message out the other day. I don't know if you heard it. I recorded it and then set it to repeat, so hopefully you caught it. I just figured I didn't want to respond to your message and have you not hear it. So I hoped that in reading your message out loud, you would know that I was going to respond and stay tuned in. I don't know. I don't know how any of this works.

So anyway, hopefully you are listening and hopefully I said that name correctly, Passerine. I don't know that I'm familiar with that particular type of bird, but I like a theme. You're definitely right in that I have had a year. Sometimes if I think about it too much, it doesn't seem real. It doesn't seem like all of those things happened in a 12 month period, especially when compared to the previous six years. I didn't know life could be that full. Maybe full is the wrong word because obviously I was alone for pretty much all of it. But eventful. And different, right? Just different. That's what I wanted and that's what I got and..

I wanted to not feel so alone and...to your point- talking to you helped me with that feeling. So did Donnie of course. I think about him every single day. It was easier- it was easier to miss him. To miss Richie and Pete and Sylvie and Francis and Martha and everyone else...it was easy to miss them when I thought there was nothing I could do, when I thought that the whole world had just gone mad and any help I could have provided, was way too late.

So it hurts worse now. The fact that he's gone. Because I was in a position to help him, to protect him. And I...I failed.

[static]

And you're right, Passerine. Some days I do want to run away?. And wrap myself in that darkness. And today is one of those days I... Harry said something, made some joke and...I don't know. It just set me off, you know? It was like for a second I could hear the echo of what Don would have said had he been there, because even though it wasn't perfect between all of us, we did, you know, we had a rhythm and and Harry would say something and then Richie would say something, and Don would come in with the punch line, or Harry and Richie would be arguing and Don would mediate and-- or lean over to me and make a joke, just the two of us. And this was one of those moments where there should have been another beat, right? I said something. Harry said something, and then...

And he wasn't there. He just - he just wasn't there. I still heard his voice. Still imagined what he would have said.

It's not like that's the first time that's happened, right, in the last seven years. Like, Harry and I have had plenty of times where we feel the specter of the people that we lost around us. But it's worse now.

[static]

Sorry, I didn't mean to make a response to your message about this. I just, I wanted to follow your advice. You know, in feeling that feeling of wanting to run into the darkness, turning here instead to talk to you. I wanted to. I wanted to do that.

[static]

And I'm glad I could be a reminder for you. I don't know why you feel lonely or if you are literally alone. You didn't tell me much about you, but I'm glad if I eased some of that feeling a little bit. It's weird to think about. It's strange to think about being a part of people's lives when I don't know those people, you know? I mean, that's part of life no matter what, right? he person behind you in line gives you that last quarter that you need to buy coffee and they make your day okay. And you think about them and remember their face and they don't really think about you, right? They did a nice thing and it didn't really cost them much, but it made an impact on you.

Things like that happen all the time, happen every day in a place like New York City, where most of the people you're interacting with on any given day are complete strangers that you'll probably never see again. So it's not like I haven't always been a supporting character in people's stories and vice versa. But well, you know, there's the whole being a part of people's lives when those people's lives are occurring in different timelines thing which is still hard to wrap my mind around, but I can't think about too long or my head because I'll wobbly.

But, even beyond that, I don't- I don't know what your face looks like. I don't even know your real name. And granted, you don't know my real name, not my full name. But you know my voice. You know things about my life, about my mind, about my heart. And the most wild thing is that all of that means something to you. It means something to you that I have feelings and that I've shared what's happened to me and that I continue to share what's happening to me now and that...

Sometimes I think, why does anyone care? But then I think, gosh, I mean, if I had someone to listen to on the radio who knew things that I didn't and had lived life that I hadn't lived, I'd wanna listen to them too, just for some entertainment. At this point, I'm pretty sure I know everything about Harry that I ever will know.

Well, that's not true. But, you know, seven years of someone...You kinda hear all their stories at least once. Anyway. I feel like I'm repeating my stories and my thoughts. But, it still just blows me away. That people care. That people think I'm brave.

You're right. The true loneliness is being unknown. And I hope you do break out of that. I really do, because. It is such a cage, isn't it? To feel like no one knows you. And sometimes I wonder with Harry if I'm opening that door and walking into that cage myself over and over again. Because she knows me. Of course she knows me. But even now, even now that she knows the truth of my feelings, sometimes I get afraid of her seeing me. Of her knowing me in my heart of hearts. And I want to hide. I want to run away and...who does that serve?

So this is my promise to you, Passerine. I will keep calling out. I will not run into the darkness. And I will try to let myself be known. I hope the same for you.

Whiskey out.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

---

[TRANSCRIPT]

Hey Whiskey

Call me Passerine. Figured I'd keep with the bird theme that's going on around here.

I've been seeing these messages coming through for a while now, but only recently did I take the time to actually sit down and hear. And, wow. What a year you have had. From visiting all of these beautiful places, to the danger of being chased, and all the heartache that Harry has brought you, I'm so glad you chose to call out to us. Some days I wish I had the bravery to do that, to call out to the world and let them know what the inside of my heart looks like. Or, well, to just go up to the people around me and just let them see the outside. I feel like even in a timeline where I'm surrounded with people, the loneliness still gets to me. I don't think you understand just how brave you are, to fight through that loneliness, to tell the world, and Harry, what it is that you feel. I think sometimes true loneliness is being unknown. I don't know how to break out of that.

I'm so glad that you aren't alone anymore, even though I know some days you'll probably feel it again. Some days you're going to want to run away into the wilderness, and wrap yourself in the comfort of darkness, and just stay where no one can see or hear you. But I think this past year has shown that you're strong enough to fight that urge. And hey, if you're ever feeling that way, like that loneliness is creeping up on you, you know what to do. Turn on that radio, and tell us everything. We'll be here for you. You're never alone. And I think that's what I'm most grateful for. You've reminded me again that I don't have to be alone. Thanks Whiskey.

This has been Passerine, over and out.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A response to Red.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

------

[TRANSCRIPT]

Well, hi there, Red. It's good to hear from you. It's strange to hear from you, to talk to you, to talk to anybody, which I know you understand. I haven't been ignoring your transmissions if you really have been sending them for this long. I—I just really haven't heard anything until now. 

And it’s..hard to think about. You know, when when we first got here and I switched on the radio and turned it to the channel that Birdie told me to, it was such a gift, hearing all those voices. But it was also hard. To think that so many people have been calling out and I just hadn’t… 

[static]

It's something I've struggled with. I did…I needed time to breathe and to figure out what to do next, to figure out things with Harry. And, well, I'm not necessarily any closer on any of those things, but it's been good, I think, to step back a little bit. But I did feel bad. You know, I felt bad leaving people behind just when I finally found them. But then I thought, well, who do I respond to? How do I respond? How do I know that in all of the frequencies and all of the transmissions coming from all these different timelines, how can I make sure I hear from the people that I want to hear from? The next transmission you send, Red, if you send another one, how am I going to be sure that I can can hear it and document it? We've got the radio running all day, every day and are absolutely burning through tape recording it when one of us isn't there. I know we're going to run out at some point and…

Harry says I'm not responsible for the world, but hearing you talk what you've been through the last seven years…the loneliness. Missing the sun. I'm glad that I was able to bring some color, some light back into your life, but I just can't help thinking, where are you? Are you here? Are you somewhere else? Are you somewhere that I can get to? Birdie said that things shifted again and I still don't know how. Still haven't seen any sign of what's different. But to think that you and I could merge our disparate timelines. Our isolated little personal purgatories could somehow join up down the line, I don't know. I don't know how we would know or how we would find one another. 

I guess if there's anything that you can tell me specifically about the world that you're in now…maybe that'll help narrow things down a little. I don't know. 

[static]

But I'm glad I finally heard you. And I hope you hear this. I hope you know that I wasn't ignoring you. I've been listening. I've been trying to listen for so long. Also you should know that I got a real crack out of you assigning colors to everybody. It sounds like you nailed them, too. I mean, Pete being money green is…

[static]

And I did get a good chuckle out of you picking a color that you didn't like very much for Harry. I mean, that's probably what I would have done too. But if it makes you feel any better about things, I think she liked the idea of a yellow-orange. You know, because she's a painter too she thinks about colors differently. There is no ugly color to her. It's all possibility. 

Anyway, Red, I hope…I hope your loneliness abates a little bit in the way that mine has. Being with Harry hasn't felt that void. Not entirely. I don't know that anything can or will unless we can find our way back, but it has helped. Being honest with her has helped. So I hope wherever you are that you're safe and that I can add more colors to your palette in the future. 

Whiskey out.

[static]

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Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

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[TRANSCRIPT]

Hello Whiskey. Ohh, that feels weird. Like… sending a message to your best friend but… also to a celebrity that has no idea you exist. I must sound a little crazy. And maybe I am. You’d probably go a little crazy down here, too. 

Anyway, I don’t think I’ve actually gone crazy, pretty sure I read somewhere that if you’re still able to think about whether or not you are, then you aren’t. I think therefore I am not crazy? I don’t know. I don’t think any of my transmissions are getting through, anyway. Or maybe they are and you’re just… ignoring them. That… that hurts more, I think. Knowing that someone else is out there and they don’t want to talk to you. Or maybe they’re getting trapped somewhere between here and the surface. I don’t think it’s because they sound crazy or anything – I listened back to them to be sure. That was weird, hearing my own voice. The sound was… foreign. A stranger. 

I know your voice better than my own, now. I could pick it out of thousands of radio signals. Couldn’t even recognize my own played back to me. But then it’s not like I’ve had much to say these past… seven years? I think it’s been seven. I stopped counting the days a while ago. Just got… depressing. All those… plain white concrete walls covered in tally marks.

(Cheering) But now my walls look beautiful. I’ve been transcribing everything you’ve said – I have tapes of every broadcast, and I’ve written down every word. Pasted them up on my walls. And I haven’t used my paints in years – even… even before all of this, but… they needed a little colour. 

I started by making my own notes in red, and then your locations in green, for the landscape, and Birdie’s messages in blue. Like a bluebird. And all the people you talked about - Don’s rust, Richie’s yellow, Pete’s green – not like the landscape, but like… money. Like the colour that I remember money being, at least. And Harry was… well. I had decided her colour back when I thought she had hurt you – and she had, of course, but I mean… back when I thought she did it for the sake of it. 

So I gave her this… yellow-orange colour. And knowing what I know now, I feel… a little bad about that. I wish I’d given her a prettier one. But maybe she would like it. It’s not terrible. Sort of a… sunny orange. Like the colour that I remember the sun being, at least. Anyway, every… every rainbow needs some sun, right? And their names… they make a rainbow.

(Tearing up) You brought that rainbow back into my life, Whiskey. Seven years of white walls, and now there’s colour. Seven years of silence, and you bring back sound. Seven years of isolation and desolation and hopelessness… and you bring back… me.

You mentioned liking Rothko, back on… (checks) transmission 179. I mean, I’m no Rothko, obviously, but… I suppose he won’t mind if I take a little inspiration from him

So Whiskey… you can call me ‘Red’.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.

If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.

If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.

------

[TRANSCRIPT]

Breaker, breaker, this is whiskey calling out to one and all. 

[click, static] 

Hi, everybody. I know it's been a minute. I’m—I'm weirdly nervous talking to you now. Now that I know that people are listening. Now that I know that people across infinite timelines are listening, it's a lot of pressure. I feel like I have a little inkling of what Jean Shepard would have felt getting on the radio every night, except I actually think I probably have more listeners than Jean, which yeah, I actually can't think about that very much or I will get even more nervous. 

[static]

As an update because some of you have seemed curious— we’re doing good, I think. Not too much has changed since my last transmission. We're still where we were, although I think we're going to have to head down the mountain soon. The weather is changing and I don't think we want to be here when the snow comes. Well, when the snow really comes, there is already snow because we're that high up. But we can't survive a winter here, not with how thin these walls are. As for where we go next, I don't know. I know I probably won't be telling you. Not because I don't want you guys to know, but because. Well, you know, people may be listening and I don't want to invite any more trouble than I already am inclined to do, just living my life. 

[static]

Harry and I are good for the most part. I mean, we've had a few blow up, knock down, drag out fights. Well, you know, a dozen, maybe. Nothing— nothing earth shattering, just the usual. Although now we have a a different mode of conflict resolution, by which I mean we actually make attempts at conflict resolution now and in a way that I think is very productive. Maybe not talking things out as much as we should, but I don't think either of us can complain. So. Yeah, we're. We're okay. 

Not much else to report. Not much has changed. Haven't heard from Birdie or from Fox since that last big transmission, but I have been hearing from a lot of you. We spend most of our days sifting through all the different messages we get. Some of them are like this, and a lot of them are Morse code, which I don't think either of us were expecting necessarily. But it's nice to have somebody else with me to translate the Morse code. 

One of you…one of you sent a morse code message asking if this was real. You said it was a cool project and that that threw me because does that mean that somehow you, whoever you were that send that message, you're back in the normal world and this was coming through on your normal radio and you thought, hey, maybe there's another Orson Welles joint or something of that kind. Does this sound like a story to you? Like I'm just an actor pretending to be somebody stuck somewhere. I—I’m glad that you thought it was cool. In any case, I don't know that I would categorize it that way because it's my life, but yeah. 

Yeah, it’s real.

[static]

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.