Neurodivergent young people are more likely to question their gender identity, and it can be a confusing and confronting time. Not just for the individual, but also for their loved ones.

The support and validation of families is vital, but many feel unprepared; struggling to even navigate things like the role of pronouns. 

This episode gives some insight into the unique way a number of autistic and ADHD young people experience identity - including gender identity. Through deeply personal stories and expert insight, we look at how families can best support young people as they navigate this complex space, and how they can reframe it as a natural period of exploration.

At the heart of this conversation is mental health. The statistics for those at this intersection are confronting, but responsibility for better outcomes extends beyond immediate families; it rests with society as a whole.

Greater awareness of lived experience can help reduce stigma - and with it, much of the suffering. As can recognising the immense courage it takes to live authentically, especially when that identity sits outside societal norms.

In this episode:

• Adolescence: a time of identity formation for all young people.
• The mental health risks and what can significantly reduce them
• The role of interoception in identity
• The reality for parents: Uncertainty, and the fear of ‘getting it wrong’.
• The impact of stigma, and what it feels like to navigate the world as non-binary or trans and neurodivergent
• Practical advice for parents: how to support without rushing or shutting things down
• Why authenticity isn’t a choice

No Such Thing as Normal is made with support from NZ On Air

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Why do so many neurodivergent people struggle in the workplace; even when they are highly capable?

In this episode, Sonia speaks to workplace strategist Rich Rowley about why modern workplaces value one narrow style of thinking, and how that can leave ADHD, autistic and dyslexic employees exhausted, ashamed and underperforming.

Rich argues neurodivergent people are not simply workers who need accommodations and support; they’re an untapped valuable resource for organisations.

Neurodivergent minds often excel at complex problem-solving, and workplace culture can either unlock or suppress that potential. Rich says that when organisations get this right, every metric improves - including the bottom line. Because true neuroinclusion benefits everyone.

Guest: Rich Rowley 

For more on Brainbadge go to ​​https://neurofusion.co.nz/

In this episode:

• Why ADHD, autistic and dyslexic employees often struggle in traditional workplaces
• The hidden toll of masking, burnout and “fitting in” at work
• Why neurodivergent people may excel at solving complex problems
• How businesses may be overlooking their most valuable thinkers
• The Values–Decisions Gap
• Why psychological safety is the foundation of true neuroinclusion
• How better workplace design can benefit all employees

No Such Thing as Normal is made with support from NZ On Air

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Isabella* is just 22, but she’d been living with severe contamination OCD for eight years. It had taken over her life - touching people, objects, even parts of her own home, felt dangerous. Every interaction came with a cost: hours of cleaning, sanitising and rituals.

In this episode we follow Isabella’s story. From a life ruled by OCD to her experience with a revolutionary therapy: the Bergen 4 day Treatment (B4DT).

Over 100 thousand New Zealanders are estimated to suffer from OCD and access to treatment is difficult.  Thanks to the charity Open Closed Doors the B4DT had it’s first New Zealand trial in January of this year.  And the results were phenomenal.

Guests:

Isabella*

Dr Bjarne Hansen

Dr Marthinus Bekker

Emma Chapman

Mihi Gillies

To find out more, or to support the charity go to Open Closed Doors. 

Resources:

Open Closed Doors.

Fixate - FB group

In this episode:

• Isabella’s story: what OCD feels like from the inside
• The hidden cost of OCD: intrusive thoughts, compulsions, and the exhausting mental load
• Why OCD is so often misunderstood, and why logic alone doesn’t work
• The impact on families, relationships, and daily life
• The gold-standard treatment: Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), and its limitations
• The first New Zealand trial of the Bergen 4-day Treatment (B4DT) - an intensive four-day therapy
• Insights from co-founder Bjarne Hansen on anxiety, intention, and “cracking the code”
• Willingness:  the key predictor of recovery
• A strengths-based reframe of OCD: these traits are not weaknesses.
• “Don’t feed the cat”. Learning to respond differently to intrusive thoughts
• What recovery looks like in real life.
• Honest reflections on early recovery, the highs, the doubts, and what comes next
• Practical insights for parents and families: supporting without reinforcing OCD

No Such Thing as Normal is made with support from NZ On Air

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ADHD is being talked about more than ever.  But for many, life still feels harder than it should. Even with a diagnosis there can be a lingering sense of “Why is life still so difficult?”

In this episode, Sonia speaks with ADHD coach Alex Campbell, to find out what we’re missing.

Alex says ADHD brains are motivated by interest, not importance. But the world expects the opposite, and that’s the where issues arise.

People often develop hidden systems to try to meet life’s demands - hypervigilance, hyper-independence and a harsh inner-critic.  But these come at a cost.  Their are high rates of burnout and exhaustion for those with ADHD.

This conversation explores a different way forward: understanding how your brain works, and learning how to work with it, rather than constantly pushing against it.

In this episode:

• How interest acts as the fuel for focus and executive function
• Why simple tasks can feel disproportionately hard to start
• How the brain creates stimulation when things feel boring
• Negative interest: why anxiety and urgency often become the default fuel
• The hidden coping systems (hypervigilance, masking, hyper-independence)
• The role of the inner critic
• The long-term cost: exhaustion, stress and burnout
• Internal vs external hyperactivity.
• ADHD and emotional intensity
• Spiky strengths: brilliant in some areas, challenged in others
• Practical ways to begin working with your ADHD brain, rather than against it
• The value of connection
• Identifying strengths, and using them to get activated

Guest: Alex Campbell ADHD Coach
Alex’s book ADHD… Now What? Is available here.

Resources:
VIA Character Strengths
ADHD NZ

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In this episode, Sonia Gray speaks with 12-year-old Benjamin, whose extraordinary creativity sits alongside the challenges of dyslexia. His mother, Gretchen, reflects on the hidden effort behind his learning, and what changed when his strengths were recognised and understood.

Dyslexia advocate Dean Bragonier returns, making the case that strengths-based education is not just better for individuals, but for society. He argues that when we fail to recognise neurodivergent strengths, we fail to realise that potential, along with the innovation and creativity that come with it.

The Hyphen Project in Auckland offers a different model of learning for gifted and neurodivergent teenagers who have struggled in mainstream education.

For 17-year-old Travis, who has ADHD, that shift has been life-changing. A talented digital artist, Travis couldn’t find his place in the traditional school system. He arrived at Hyphen in a mental health crisis — and found an environment that worked with his brain, not against it.

In this episode:

• Strengths-based education in practice at The Hyphen Project
• ADHD, dyslexia and “spiky” learning profiles
• Why many neurodivergent students disengage from school
• The link between anxiety, mental health and learning
• The role of belonging in re-engaging young people
• How motivation changes when learning is built around strengths
• Real-world pathways for creative and neurodivergent thinkers
• The “opportunity cost” of overlooked potential

This is a continuation of the previous episode, Strengths-based education: Unlocking the gifts, which explores how identifying strengths early can transform a child’s experience of learning.

Guests: 

Dean Bragonier Noticeability

Benjamin

Gretchen

Holly Gooch The Hyphen Project

Travis

Resources: Dyslexia Foundation NZ 

No Such Thing as Normal is made with the support of NZ On Air

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For many dyslexic children, school is where self-doubt begins. Literacy and numeracy sit at the centre of how ability is measured, so it doesn’t take long for kids who struggle in these areas to absorb the message that something is wrong with them.

And this extends beyond dyslexia. Many neurodivergent learners - including those with ADHD and autism - have strengths that sit outside the narrow skills schools traditionally measure. 

Ensuring all kids learn to read and write is important, and many will need targeted support. But are we missing something vital in this process?  Should the same emphasis be placed on the unique gifts of those with learning difficulties?

Dean Bragonier is an international dyslexia advocate and founder of non-profit organisation NoticeAbility.  He held a series of workshops in New Zealand, designed to help dyslexic students recognise their cognitive strengths.

In this episode, Sonia speaks to Dean, and from some of the children who took part in the workshops here.

This conversation focuses on dyslexia, but the idea reaches far beyond it. 

When young people discover their strengths, the story they tell about themselves can begin to change.

In this episode you’ll hear:

• Why many dyslexic students internalise the belief that they’re “not smart”.
• How the changing nature of the workplace may favour neurodivergent strengths.
• Why a negative self-perception created in school can have lifelong effects.
• Advice for parents of dyslexic learners. 
• Why learning ‘the basics’ is hard for non-linear learners.

This is Part 1 of a two-part focus on Strengths-based education.

Guests:

Dean Bragonier NoticeAbility

Ella

Deanna

Emily

Resources:

Dyslexia Foundation NZ

TED X: The True Gifts of a Dyslexic Mind | Dean Bragonier 

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Parenting a child with ADHD, autism, Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), Pervasive Demand Avoidance (PDA) or sensory challenges can feel unpredictable.

One day everything is fine. The next day it isn’t. Food they ate yesterday is suddenly rejected. A fun outing becomes overwhelming. And sometimes it all ends in a meltdown.

Perhaps your child doesn’t have a diagnosis, but it’s clear they’re not coping. And neither are you.

In this episode, Sonia Gray speaks with sensory integration practitioner Elen Nathan about what’s going on in these moments.  And why the answers parents often look for may not be the ones that help most.

This conversation explores a powerful shift in how challenging behaviour is understood. Regardless of a child’s specific diagnosis or neurotype, their nervous system may be trying to tell us something important.

So what actually helps when nothing seems to be working? 

Elen says: “It all boils down to a sense of safety.”

In this episode we explore:

• What to do when your child isn’t coping
• Why behaviour can change from one day to the next
• What you can do while waiting for a diagnosis
• Why meltdowns are often misunderstood
• The shift in how experts think about behaviour and sensory processing
• How to deal with the judgement of others

If you’re parenting a child who isn’t coping right now, this conversation may offer some insight.

Guest:  Elen Nathan The Playful Place

No Such Thing as Normal is made with support from NZ On Air

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ADHD stimulant medication use is rising in New Zealand, but questions about safety and side effects remain - as does the stigma surrounding these meds.

In the first episode of Season three, Sonia Gray explores what ADHD medication actually does - and what it doesn’t. You’ll hear 11-year-old Tilly take her morning pill and describe, in real time, how it changes the way she feels.

Sonia also speaks with Professor Dave Coghill about how stimulant medication works. Dave addresses some common concerns around safety and effectiveness, and explains what a comprehensive medication trial should involve.

Medication isn’t the only treatment for ADHD. But for many, it can be life-changing.

Note: This episode is for educational purposes only and does not replace personalised medical advice. Always consult a qualified health professional about treatment decisions.

Guests:
Professor Dave Coghill
Tilly and Bex

Resources:  ADHD NZ

No Such Thing as Normal is made with support from NZ On Air

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We all know what Tourette’s is - or we think we do.  But this is a condition that is largely misunderstood and routinely misrepresented. Only around 10% of those with Tourette’s syndrome have the ‘swearing tic’ - coprolalia.  But the other vocal and motor tics can be just as debilitating.

In this episode, Sonia speaks to Tiktok sensation, Leighton Clarke - aka Uncle Tics. He now embraces his Tourette’s and encourages others to do the same.

We also hear from Fyfe, a bubbly and creative 10-year-old. Her mother Amanda describes Fyfe’s journey - from the occasional tic, to a diagnosis of Tourette’s syndrome.

And clinical psychologist, Hilary Mack, talks about the connection between Tourette’s Syndrome, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and ADHD.

Guests:
Leighton Clarke (Uncle Tics) Tiktok
Fyfe and Amanda
Hilary Mack Hilary Mack Psychology

Resources: Tourette’s Association of NZ

Instagram - No Such Thing as Normal Podcast

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A diagnosis of ADHD, autism or dyslexia is merely an indication that your brain works in a different - and exciting - way.

So why are the rates of co-occurring anxiety and depression so high for neurodivergent people?  

In this episode, Sonia talks to 16-year-old Emily Martin, who has ADHD, dyslexia and dyscalculia.  Emily suffered from intense anxiety and low self-esteem throughout her primary school years.

Therapist Jane Kjersten explains the specific type of trauma that can come from feeling ‘lesser than’, and suggests ways to heal from the emotional pain.

Guests:
Emily and Jo Martin
Jane Kjersten Jane Kjersten Therapist 

Instagram - No Such Thing as Normal Podcast

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Dyspraxia (or Developmental Coordination Disorder) is more than just a difficulty tying shoelaces or riding a bike.  It impacts almost every aspect of life, and the effort to carry out basic tasks can be exhausting.

Sonia talks to Bayley Garnham, a 24 year old Personal Trainer, who has dyspraxia and dysgraphia. Dyspraxic kids often give up on sports early, but Bayley wants to change that.  He believes these kids need a different approach to learning sports.

And Sensory Integration Practitioner, Elen Nathan, explains what dyspraxia/DCD is - and what’s going on inside the minds of those with this ‘hidden’ condition.

Guests:
Bayley Garnham bayley garnham – personal trainer
Elen Nathan The Playful Place

Instagram - No Such Thing as Normal Podcast

Resources:  Dyspraxia NZ

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