What if I told you that the people triggering you, challenging you and frustrating you are actually offering you some of the most valuable information about yourself?

And what if learning how to use that information was one of the greatest little cheat codes to life?

In today's episode of The Upgrade Edit, we're diving into a perspective that has completely transformed the way I move through the world.

We're talking about the people around us being mirrors, recognising our unconscious patterns, learning to regulate our nervous systems, honouring our boundaries and taking our power back instead of giving it away to the circumstances around us.

I'm sharing some of my own recent experiences with dating, relationships and the beautiful (and sometimes incredibly uncomfortable) lessons that unfold when we start looking at life as a series of levels to unlock.

Because the truth is, we can't control the people around us, but we can learn to understand ourselves, choose how we respond and become a little more intentional with the energy we bring into our lives.

And once you begin to see life through this lens, everything starts to shift.

Consider this your loving little pep talk to stop taking everything so personally, start getting curious about what life is showing you and remember just how much power you hold in creating your own reality.

Because a bad day doesn't mean a bad life. Sometimes it's simply beautiful data for tomorrow.

After taking some time to land, integrate and find my feet again, I’m finally ready to share what happened during my return to the Amazon.

This was my second time in the Peruvian Amazon, but this journey felt incredibly different. This time, I had the privilege of bringing a beautiful group with me and witnessing them experience the land, the medicine and the magic that changed so much for me the first time around.

In this episode, I take you inside the experience and share some of the moments, ceremonies and teachings that have stayed with me since coming home.

My intention going into this journey was to learn how to hold desire with an open palm. To allow myself to want deeply, dream deeply and be excited for what is coming, without allowing those desires to pull me away from the life that is already here. 

And what unfolded became such a beautiful lesson in presence.

I share what the medicine taught me about stillness over chasing, becoming the grounded woman, trusting what is meant for me, finding safety within myself and recognising that pleasure, love and aliveness are not things we have to wait for another person or experience to give us. They are states we can learn to cultivate within our own bodies. 

This episode is ultimately about learning to hold both.

Desire and presence. Expansion and gratitude. The spiritual and the human. Being deeply in love with where you are while remaining completely open to how good life can still become.

This is a very special episode and a little glimpse into a week that I know will stay with me forever. 🌿🤎

What happens when you stop believing every thought you have… and start observing it instead?

In this episode of The Upgrade Edit, I’m talking about one of the biggest shifts I’ve noticed in myself lately: my ability to become the observer of my own life.

After a situation completely rattled my nervous system and pulled me back into old patterns, resentment, rumination and ways of being that I thought I had moved beyond, I realised something pretty incredible. Even amongst the chaos, there was another part of me watching it all unfold.

I could see the trigger.
I could hear the old thoughts.
I could feel what was happening in my body.
And, for the first time, I didn’t have to become any of it.

We explore metacognition — essentially, the ability to observe your own thinking — and how learning to witness your thoughts, reactions and conditioning can create space between what happens to you and who you choose to be because of it.

I share a very real example involving a braless afternoon walk, an unfortunately placed construction site 😂 and the split-second decision that showed me just how often we change ourselves because of what we think other people might be thinking about us.

We also talk about letting go of old timelines — from burning years of journals to quite literally smashing my favourite mug — and why I’ve suddenly felt such a strong pull to clear physical, emotional and energetic space before heading into the Amazon.

But more than anything, this episode is about the tiny choices.

The moment you notice the thought and choose differently.

The moment you feel yourself shrinking and decide not to.

The moment an old version of you comes online and, rather than judging her, you simply observe her with curiosity and compassion.

Because changing your life doesn’t always require one enormous quantum leap. Sometimes the leap happens in the smallest moments, when you interrupt an old pattern and choose a new direction.

And perhaps that’s where our power really is.

Not in controlling every experience.

Not in never being triggered.

Not in becoming so “healed” that nothing affects us.

But in becoming conscious enough to witness ourselves inside the experience and decide what happens next.

Your little homework after this episode: observe yourself.

Notice the thoughts you think most often. Notice what happens in your body when you feel uncomfortable. Notice where fear changes your direction. Notice where an old version of you is still making decisions.

And then ask yourself:

Do I want to keep choosing this?

Because you are allowed to choose again x

www.theupgradebydavina.com
Instagram: @davvyxx

What if the things you're desperately trying to force are already making their way to you?

In this episode, I'm taking you behind the scenes of how my newest retreat came to life, and trust me, I never could have planned it the way it unfolded!

Although this retreat has only just sold out, the truth is its story began over four years ago. Looking back now, I can see the seemingly random conversations, unexpected opportunities, courageous decisions, and intuitive nudges that slowly led me here. At the time, none of it made logical sense. But in hindsight, every single step was preparing me for this moment.

I also share the powerful reminder that some of the greatest opportunities, relationships, abundance, and experiences in my life haven't arrived because I controlled every detail. They arrived because I was willing to pay attention to the breadcrumbs, trust my intuition, and keep taking the next aligned step, even when I couldn't yet see where the path was leading.

This episode is an invitation to zoom out and reflect on your own life. What if the delays, detours, and unexpected turns aren't setbacks at all? What if they're part of something far greater than you can currently see?

If you've ever questioned your timing, felt frustrated by uncertainty, or wondered whether life is really working in your favour, I hope this conversation reminds you that divine orchestration is often only visible in hindsight.

Sometimes your only job is to trust the next breadcrumb.
ENJOY X

Sometimes your biggest breakthroughs are waiting for you in the pause.

In this episode, I share what happened after I intentionally gave myself three days to completely switch off. No pushing. No forcing. Just rest.

What followed was a wave of clarity, creativity, renewed energy and some of the biggest downloads I've had in months.

We explore why rest isn't something you have to earn, but a powerful part of the creative and healing process. I also share how I've been creating space for a new chapter by simplifying my life, physically, emotionally and energetically. From clearing out my wardrobe and cutting my hair to pruning my rose bushes, every act became a reminder that growth often requires release before expansion.

And at the end of the episode, I share one of the most symbolic things I've ever done: why I decided to burn years of my journals and what that ritual taught me about letting go of old identities, honouring the woman I've been, and making space for the woman I'm becoming.

If you've been craving a reset, feeling burnt out, or sensing that life is asking you to slow down before your next leap, I hope this conversation gives you permission to trust the season you're in.

Because your next upgrade might not come from doing more.

It might come from finally allowing yourself to rest.

www.theupgradebydavina.com

Many women assume a lack of desire is a hormone problem.

But what if it's actually a reflection of chronic stress, self-abandonment, nervous system dysregulation and a life that no longer feels nourishing to your soul?

As an energetic healer, embodiment coach and somatic practitioner, I've noticed a common thread amongst women who feel disconnected from their sexuality.

More often than not, they're not disconnected from sex.

They're disconnected from themselves.

Their joy.

Their creativity.

Their pleasure.

Their playfulness.

Their truth.

In this episode, we're diving into the connection between the sacral chakra, nervous system regulation, self-abandonment and desire. We'll explore why so many women struggle to access pleasure when they're living in survival mode, constantly over-giving, people-pleasing or abandoning their own needs.

We'll also unpack why desire isn't something you force, but something that naturally emerges when the conditions are right.

Inside this episode we explore:

• The sacral chakra and its connection to pleasure, sensuality, creativity and receiving

• Common signs your sacral energy may be depleted or blocked

• Why self-abandonment slowly disconnects women from desire

• The nervous system's role in pleasure, intimacy and sexual expression

• How chronic stress impacts your capacity to receive and feel

• The link between integrity, self-trust and feminine magnetism

• Why your partner can't give you what you're unwilling to give yourself

• Practical ways to reconnect with pleasure, play, creativity and your life force energy

If you've been telling yourself that you have a low libido, this episode invites you to ask a different question:

What if your body isn't broken?

What if it's simply asking for more truth, more pleasure and more of you?

Because sometimes the path back to desire isn't found in the bedroom.

It's found in the way you live your life.

Connect with Davina:

Instagram: @davvyxx

Website: www.theupgradebydavina.com

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a woman who needs this reminder and tag me on Instagram so I can hear your biggest takeaway.

With love,

Davina x

Why is it that some of the most intelligent, successful, self-aware women can find themselves completely distracted by a man?

Why do we suddenly start checking our phones more often, replaying conversations in our heads, neglecting our routines, and feeling emotionally impacted by someone we've only known for a matter of weeks?

In this episode of The Upgrade Edit, I'm diving into the fascinating neuroscience behind attraction, attachment, and self-abandonment.

After spending almost three years celibate, I experienced some of the biggest growth of my life. My business expanded, my confidence deepened, my connection to myself strengthened, and I built a life that felt rich, purposeful, and aligned.

Now that I'm dating again, I've found myself reflecting on a powerful question:

Why do so many women lose themselves in love?

Together, we'll explore the role dopamine plays in attraction, why your brain can mistake chemistry for compatibility, how attachment patterns influence dating behaviours, and why your nervous system is often seeking familiarity rather than what's actually best for you.

This isn't an episode about becoming independent or avoiding relationships.

It's about learning how to stay connected to yourself whilst allowing love into your life.

Because the goal isn't to stop loving others.

The goal is to stop abandoning yourself in the process.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why early-stage attraction can feel addictive

• The role dopamine plays in dating and relationships

• Why your brain is wired to seek connection

• How attachment styles shape romantic patterns

• The difference between chemistry and compatibility

• Why healthy love can initially feel unfamiliar

• How women are conditioned to prioritise others over themselves

• The subtle signs of self-abandonment in dating

• What three years of celibacy taught me about self-worth, purpose, and fulfilment

• How to remain grounded, embodied, and connected to yourself whilst dating

Reflection Questions

• What happens to my energy when I start dating someone?

• What parts of myself tend to shrink when romantic feelings grow?

• Am I seeking connection, or am I seeking validation?

• What practices help me stay anchored in myself?

• Am I building a life that feels exciting outside of a relationship?

Connect With Davina

Follow along on Instagram: @davvyxx

Explore retreats, coaching, embodiment work, and upcoming events via the links in my bio.

If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend or post it to your stories and tag me. Every share helps this message reach more women who are ready to stop chasing love and start coming home to themselves.

Because the healthiest relationships aren't built by two people looking to be completed.

They're built by two whole people who choose to walk alongside one another. ❤️‍🔥

We spend so much of our lives looking ahead.

Manifesting the relationship.

Manifesting the milestone.

Manifesting the next chapter.

Always reaching for what's next, believing that's where happiness, fulfillment, and abundance live.

But what if we're so focused on what's missing that we're overlooking the beauty of what's already ours?

In this episode, I share the unexpected lessons that came through during a beautiful weekend away with my daughter, Mila. A weekend that reminded me to slow down, be present, and fully receive the life that's already unfolding in front of me.

We explore the kind of love that isn't often celebrated, the magic hidden within ordinary moments, and how constantly chasing more can sometimes disconnect us from the abundance that's already here.

I also share the beautiful download I received for my newest passion project, The Village | Mama & Child Connection Retreats — a heart-led offering inspired by the connection, presence, play, and community that Mila and I experienced together.

This conversation is an invitation to soften, slow down, and remember that perhaps the life you've been longing for is already here, waiting for you to notice it.

Follow along:
Instagram: @davvyxx
Instagram: @thevillageconnectionretreats

In this Manifestation Special episode, Davina dives deep into the emotional and energetic side of manifestation and the “secret weapon” most people completely overlook when trying to call in more love, money, success, opportunities, confidence, and aligned relationships.

This episode explores how your nervous system, emotional state, thoughts, and energetic patterns shape the reality you continue to experience and why manifestation is about so much more than vision boards and positive thinking.

Inside this conversation, Davina shares:
• Why your emotions are actually a built in alignment GPS
• How your emotional state impacts what you attract into your life
• The connection between embodiment, nervous system safety, and manifestation
• Why your body must feel safe to receive the things you desire
• How your thoughts and attention influence your energetic reality
• The difference between manifesting from alignment vs anxiety
• Why “the better it gets, the better it gets”
• The role of self awareness in shifting emotional and energetic patterns
• How to begin creating new neural pathways through intentional focus and embodied awareness
• Why pleasure, aliveness, and emotional honesty matter in manifestation work

This is a grounded, candid, and deeply expansive conversation for anyone wanting to better understand the relationship between their inner world and the reality they are creating around them.

If you’ve been feeling stuck in cycles of stress, fear, overthinking, or emotional overwhelm while trying to “manifest” a different life… this episode will completely shift the way you view the process.

Instagram: @davvyxx

In this episode, I share my journey from anxious attachment to becoming securely attached, and how that has completely changed the way I experience love.

After years of doing the inner work, spending time alone, and learning how to truly meet myself, I have stepped back into dating in a very different way.

What has surprised me the most is not just the connection I have created, but who I am within it.

This episode is a raw and embodied reflection on what it feels like to feel safe in love, stay grounded in your body, communicate your needs clearly, and soften into a relationship without losing yourself.

I also share the key shifts that supported me in moving from anxious to secure, and why this kind of love feels so different to anything I have experienced before.

IN THIS EPISODE

• My journey from anxious attachment to secure
• What it feels like to be securely attached
• The nervous system shift that allows you to feel safe in love
• How I stopped abandoning myself in relationships
• The 5 lessons that made dating feel calmer and more aligned
• Why softness comes from safety
• How doing the work alone changed everything

If you are in a season of doing the work or learning to come home to yourself, this episode is for you In this episode, I share my journey from anxious attachment to becoming securely attached, and how that has completely changed the way I experience love.

After years of doing the inner work, spending time alone, and learning how to truly meet myself, I have stepped back into dating in a very different way.

What has surprised me the most is not just the connection I have created, but who I am within it.

This episode is a raw and embodied reflection on what it feels like to feel safe in love, stay grounded in your body, communicate your needs clearly, and soften into a relationship without losing yourself.

I also share the key shifts that supported me in moving from anxious to secure, and why this kind of love feels so different to anything I have experienced before.

✨ IN THIS EPISODE

• My journey from anxious attachment to secure
• What it feels like to be securely attached
• The nervous system shift that allows you to feel safe in love
• How I stopped abandoning myself in relationships
• The 5 lessons that made dating feel calmer and more aligned
• Why softness comes from safety
• How doing the work alone changed everything

If you are in a season of doing the work or learning to come home to yourself, this episode is for you.

Instagram @davvyxx
www.theupgradebydavina.com

In this episode, I’m sharing some of the most powerful permission slips I’ve learned as an embodiment coach.

So many people stay stuck in situations that drain them because they feel guilty leaving, speaking up, or changing.

But growth often requires us to make decisions that other people might not understand.

We talk about:

• Why your social media should be a space that supports your wellbeing
• The truth about “cringe” and why you should still post the content
• How to recognise when friendships are no longer aligned
• Boundaries in dating and noticing what someone brings out in you
• The difference between relationships that activate your inner child vs your caretaker
• Why you are allowed to leave jobs, relationships, or environments that no longer feel right
• The power of reinventing yourself at any moment

This episode is your reminder that you don’t need approval to live a life that feels authentic.

Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is give yourself permission.

https://www.theupgradebydavina.com/