The newborn season can leave couples exhausted, overwhelmed, and struggling to find the time or energy for intimacy, but it doesn't have to mean losing connection with one another. In this episode, we talk about spiritual, emotional, and physical intimacy and how husbands and wives can pursue one another, give grace, and stay connected while navigating the chaos of a new baby.

Discussion Questions:

1. Which type of intimacy (spiritual, emotional, or physical) has been hardest for us to maintain in this season? Why?

2. What is one thing I could do that would help you feel more seen, known, and cared for right now?

3. What rhythms or “little rituals” could we create to protect our emotional connection, even when we don't have much time?

4. How has our relationship with God changed since entering the newborn season? Where do we need to pursue Him together more intentionally?

5. Are there ways either of us has been viewing intimacy primarily through the lens of our own needs? What would it look like to “outdo one another in showing honor”?

6. How can we communicate honestly about physical intimacy without either spouse feeling pressured, rejected, or ashamed?

7. What is one thing about our marriage in this season that we can choose to be grateful for?

8. Instead of trying to get back to the way our marriage was before kids, what might God be inviting us to build in this new season?

Parenthood was never meant to be happen in isolation. But, what do you do when "help" isn't helpful? And how do you know if it's them or you? In the 3rd episode of the "marriage in the newborn season" series, we discuss how to invite community into your marriage, establish healthy boundaries with family, ask for help without shame, and raise your children alongside others.

Discussion Questions

- Why is it difficult to ask for help?

- What practical help would bless us most during this season?

- What boundaries do we want to establish with parents, in-laws, and visitors? Is there anything unfair in our boundaries?

- How can we stay connected to our church and life group instead of isolating ourselves?

- Who are the trusted people we want speaking into our marriage and parenting?

- Are we receiving help with humility—or expecting it with entitlement? How can we practice gratitude?

Pregnancy and the first three months after bringing home a baby can be some of the sweetest and hardest days of your marriage. In this second episode of our "marriage in the newborn season" series, we talk honestly about pregnancy, postpartum recovery, sleep deprivation, serving one another, and how husbands and wives can protect their marriage while navigating the and "fourth trimester."

Discussion Questions for Couples

- What fears or anxieties do we each have about pregnancy or the postpartum season?

- How can we better communicate our needs instead of expecting each other to read our minds?

- What are practical ways we can serve one another during the first 90 days?

- What rhythms (prayer, check-ins, date nights, etc.) do we want to protect after baby arrives?

- How can we intentionally guard against resentment and entitlement?

- What words of encouragement do we each need to hear more often in this season?

Having a baby changes everything, especially your marriage. In this first episode of our "marriage in the newborn season" series, we talk about the mindset, expectations, and biblical foundation couples need before entering the newborn season so they can thrive as teammates instead of simply surviving.

Discussion Questions

- What expectations do each of us have about how becoming parents will change our marriage?

- What are we most excited about, and most nervous about, as we prepare for parenthood?

- How can we intentionally prioritize our marriage after the baby arrives?

- What conversations do we still need to have about finances, work, sleep, family, or expectations?

Your phone can be an incredible tool, but it can also quietly become one of the biggest distractions in your marriage. In this episode, Derek, Andrew, and Gabrielle talk honestly about screen time, social media, work boundaries, pornography, and practical ways to make your spouse more important than your screen.

RESOURCES

Harris Creek Sermon Series “Removed”

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

1- When do our phones distract us the most from one another?

2- Have you ever felt less important than my phone?

3- What boundaries around technology would help us connect more?

4- What would one phone-free hour every evening look like?

5- Is there any app that has more influence over me than it should?

6- How can we help each other without becoming controlling?

Most couples think about selfishness as an individual problem, but what if a marriage itself can become inward-focused? In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss what it means to steward your marriage for God's glory, leverage your resources for the Kingdom, and move from keeping score to living on mission together.

Discussion Questions

1- When we honestly evaluate our marriage, are we more inward-focused or Kingdom-focused? If someone observed our marriage for a month, would they conclude we're living on mission?

Where do we tend to keep score against each other?

2- Which area are we stewarding well? Not well? Time, Money, Resources, Health, Gifts

3- Who outside our family is being impacted by our marriage?

4- What is one practical step we could take this month to better leverage our marriage for God's Kingdom?

Conflict is inevitable in marriage, but it doesn't have to be destructive. In this episode, Derek, Andrew, and Gabrielle discuss how to move from unhealthy patterns of defensiveness and scorekeeping toward biblical reconciliation, healthy communication, and deeper intimacy.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- When conflict arises, do you naturally move toward fight, flight, or freeze?

- Which unhealthy conflict pattern shows up most often in your marriage?

- What family-of-origin experiences influence the way you handle disagreement?

- How would your conflicts change if your mindset became "How do we win?" instead of "How do I win?"

- Do you have trusted people in your life who can help mediate conflict when needed?

- Is there an unresolved conflict that needs a conversation this week?

RESOURCES:

The Thing Beneath the Thing by Steve Carter

Harris Creek sermon series: "Conflicted" 

Sex is one of the most talked-about topics in culture, but can be one of the least understood topics in the church.

This week, Derek and Gabrielle sit down with pastor and author Mick Murray to discuss God's beautiful vision for sexuality, how sin distorts intimacy, why marriage doesn't automatically heal sexual brokenness, and how couples can pursue greater intimacy, healing, and freedom together.

RESOURCES

Books

- A Beautiful Vision by Mick Murray

Podcasts

- Meditations (Mick Murray)

- Ideology (Mick Murray)

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- What messages about sex did you learn growing up?

- Have we ever treated sex primarily as self-serving rather than self-giving?

- Are there unspoken expectations about intimacy that we need to discuss?

- What barriers currently keep us from greater emotional intimacy?

- How can we invite God more intentionally into this area of our marriage?

When one spouse travels regularly for work, it puts unique pressure on a marriage. From loneliness and temptation to resentment and drift, there are lots of potential issues it can create. In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott Kedersha get honest about what it really takes to keep a marriage thriving when work keeps pulling you apart.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- If one of you travels regularly for work, how well have you built communication rhythms that actually work for both of you — not just the one traveling?

- Scott talked about picking up the phone even when he'd rather not. Where in your marriage right now are you letting your own preference win over what your spouse needs?

- What temptations are most likely to come up for you specifically when you're isolated — and have you named those out loud to anyone?

- Scott said distance will exasperate any existing unhealth in a marriage, not heal it. Before taking or keeping a job that requires heavy travel, how honest are you being about the current state of your marriage?

- If you are the spouse who stays home: does your traveling spouse know specifically what would help you feel most supported before they leave and while they're gone?

- When your spouse returns from a trip, what does re-entry look like in your home — and is there anything you could do to make that transition healthier?

- Scott gave a shout-out to Kristen for holding things down at home. When did you last genuinely thank your spouse for their specific role in your marriage — whether they travel or stay home?

From GLP-1s to Botox to testosterone therapy, body-altering decisions are more normalized than ever, but what does it actually look like to process those decisions as a married couple through a Biblical lens? In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Andrew tackle the theology behind how we think about our bodies and why those decisions are never just about you.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- When it comes to decisions about your body — diet, supplements, cosmetic procedures, medical interventions — do you tend to make those decisions together or independently? Why?

- Andrew mentioned that working out became an idol for him at one point. Are there any areas of health or appearance where you sense you might be seeking something beyond physical wellbeing?

- Gabrielle shared that she had gotten into careless patterns with her appearance without thinking about why. Are there any habits you have around your body or appearance that you've never really examined?

- Derek mentioned that influences around us constantly try to make us discontent with how we look. Who or what are you allowing to shape how you feel about your body — and is it trustworthy?

- Is there any area of your body or health that feels like an "off-limits" topic in your marriage — something you wouldn't want your spouse to weigh in on? What might that be telling you?

- Cooper wrote scriptures in the shower for Gabrielle during a season of body insecurity. How are you actively speaking truth over your spouse in the way they feel about themselves?

Addiction doesn't stay self-contained — especially in a marriage. In this honest and pastorally rich conversation, Derek, Gabrielle, and John Elmore talk about how to recognize addiction, what it does to a marriage, and what courageous, biblical steps actually look like for both the addict and the spouse who loves them.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- John described the difference between being "enslaved" to something versus "occasionally enticed" by it. Using that framework, is there anything in your life right now that feels more like enslavement than struggle?

- John mentioned several "Ds" of addiction: duration, depth, deceit, destruction, defensiveness, dependency. Are any of those present in your life or your marriage in ways worth naming?

- Gabrielle shared that when asked to give up Diet Coke for a year, her reaction surprised her. Is there anything in your life where the thought of giving it up produces a stronger reaction than you'd expect?

- John said that "struggling" looks like confessing, feeling convicted, and moving toward accountability — while addiction looks like enjoyment despite destruction. Which of those better describes your relationship with your hardest habit?

- If your spouse gently raised a concern about something you're running to, how would you honestly respond — and what might that response reveal?

- For the spouse walking alongside an addict: have you carried this alone, or have you brought others in? Who could you call this week?

RESOURCES

- Freedom Starts Today by John Elmore