Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson

1 hour 4 minutes
188 - These Oysters Are SCAMMING People
What does a heat rash, a speeding ticket, and a banana shaped car all have in common? They are all in this episode, duh! We're also unpacking a teen Elvis tribute competition, Connecticut’s identity crisis, TikTok pearl parties (allegedly) scamming people, the Wheel of Fortune's shady social media manager, and so much more!
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!

Works Cited:
➜ Spartz, Isabel. “‘The World Needs More Whimsy’: Giant Banana Car Draws Attention, and a Traffic Stop, near Billings.” KBZK, 21 June 2026.
➜ Bates, Sophie. “With Jumpsuits, Wigs and Dance Moves, These Young Boys and Teens Keep Elvis’ Legacy Alive.” AP News, Associated Press, 8 June 2026.
Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
8 July 2026, 8:00 am
29 minutes 24 seconds
This Dude's Car Accident Revealed a Whole Second Life - Trail Mix #138
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper in need of advice for her fiance with a bathroom-related tic in very public settings, a camper who just wanted to visit a coworker in the hospital and instead walked into a plot twist nobody at the office saw coming, and the tale of an AXE slinging devil at church camp.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Sponsors:
➜ Shop now at Fabletics.com/camp to get 70% to 80% off everything when you sign up as a new VIP. Limited time only.
➜ Go to zbiotics.com/CAMP15 to learn more and get 15% off your first order when you use CAMP15 at checkout.
➜ Talk it out, with BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/CAMP
Camp Songs: Listen on Spotify here or Listen online here!
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
6 July 2026, 8:00 am
1 hour 1 second
187 - HAGS! (Have A Gay Summer!)
In the episode we’re talking about the “Have a Gay Summer” drama at Dartmouth High School and why one little Pride bulletin board had terrible ugly adults acting like literal idiodic children. We also get into two former nuns finding love, a robot cop that is terrible at their job, anoying little chipmunks taking over our bird feeder, Disney cruise family trauma... but dont worry bc Zach will close us out with the healing powers of Norah Jones.
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!

Works Cited:
➜ Alves, Ian. “They Were Going to Be Nuns, Now They’re Married: ‘God Was Our Cupid.’” BBC News Brasil, 21 May 2026.
➜ Marchese, Tony. “Ohio Police Retire ‘Robocop’ After It Heroically Made Zero Arrests and Issued Zero Tickets in Nearly 10 Months.” On Tap Sports Net, 19 June 2026.
Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
1 July 2026, 8:00 am
36 minutes 46 seconds
My Hooters Booth Repair Fee - Trail Mix #137
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who was forced to take her self-care routine to the streets, one camper who tea bagged too close to the sun and suffered the consequences, and a camper who went to Hooters for wings and left with structural damage on the bill.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Camp Songs: Listen on Spotify here or Listen online here!
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
29 June 2026, 8:00 am
1 hour 10 minutes
186 - Hired then Fired: My Reality TV Truth
This week at Camp Shady Birch, Counselor Zachariah was almost cast on The Real Housewives, and then his reality TV career was revoked before it even had time to find a cute outfit. CRIMINAL!! We also talk about Kiki the sheep learning to drive, a $700k gold scam that ended in chocolate coins, milk frother slander, wig shopping, and so much more!!
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!
Sponsors:
➜ Go to REVOLVE.com/CAMP to shop and use code CAMP for 15% off your entire order! This offer ends soon!
➜ Get up to 50% off your first order, plus free shipping at MeUndies.com/counselors and using our code: counselors
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
Works Cited:
➜ Miller, Heather. “This Social Media Star Can’t Walk, but She Loves to Drive and Dance.” LiveNOW from FOX, 14 May 2026.
➜ Hogan, John, and Susan Samples. “Accused Scammer Gets Chocolate Coins Instead of $700K in Gold.” KTLA, 11 June 2026.
Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
24 June 2026, 8:00 am
33 minutes 53 seconds
Broke Roommate Turns House into Rainforest Cafe - Trail Mix #136
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper who helped cover her roommate's portion of the rent only to find that she is funding the Rainforest Cafe, a camper whose cute little Irish getaway became a PetCo disaster, and a camper who had a scary run in with an alligator (and it WASN'T Princess Girl).
Sponsors:
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
➜ Go to BollAndBranch.com/camp (and use code: camp) to get up to 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets. Exclusions apply. See site for details.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Camp Songs: Listen on Spotify here or Listen online here!
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
22 June 2026, 8:00 am
1 hour 12 minutes
(Replay) 90 - The Limp Wrist Committee
(Original broadcast June 5, 2024)
In this episode, The Counselors talk all things Pride Month, drive-in theaters, and argue the existence of dinosaurs!
Sponsors
➜ Feel your best self, every day with IM8. Go to IM8health.com/CAMPCOUNSELORS and use code CAMPCOUNSELORS for a Free Welcome Kit, 5 free travel sachets, plus 10% off your order.
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
➜ Protect your teeth with Remi at ShopRemi.com/camp and use code CAMP to get 50% off your new night guard.
➜ Go to REVOLVE.com/CAMP to shop and use code CAMP for 15% off your entire order.
➜ See less carts go abandoned and more sales go with Shopify. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/camp
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
17 June 2026, 8:00 am
33 minutes 22 seconds
(Replay) Pantsless with A Broken Ankle In The Bounce House - Trail Mix #53
(Original broadcast Sep 30, 2024)
In this episode of Trail Mix, the counselors read submitted stories about a camper's date with a major celebrity's son, a videographer at a funeral, and a bounce house story that will have you wanting to bounce off the face of the Earth.
Sponsors
➜ Download Cash App Today ! Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
15 June 2026, 8:00 am
1 hour 5 minutes
185 - WE ARE ENGAGED!
Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson are engaged! In this special episode of Camp Counselors Podcast, we’re sharing the full story of our engagement weekend in Maine. After six years of dating, we’re spilling the details on how the proposal happened, from the road trip to Acadia National Park, to the private beach moment where Zachariah got down on one knee. And we couldn't be happier!
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!
Sponsors:
➜Sleep cooler this summer with Boll & Branch with 20% off sitewide at BollAndBranch.com/camp use code camp. This is a limited time offer.
➜ Go to GoodChop.com/podcast and use code 50camp to get $50 off plus free shipping on your first order of high quality meat delivered right to your door!
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
➜ Feel your best self, every day with IM8. Go to IM8health.com/CAMPCOUNSELORS and use code CAMPCOUNSELORS for a Free Welcome Kit, 5 free travel sachets, plus 10% off your order.
Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
9 June 2026, 8:00 am
32 minutes 22 seconds
Busch Light Apple Ruined Me (Beautifully) - Trail Mix #135
In this mini episode we read listener submitted stories about a camper and her possible daughter’s stolen identity, a cross-state mission for Bapple, and a dermatologist appointment that did not go as planned.
Sponsors:
➜ Shop summer-ready activewear at Fabletics.com/camp to get 70–80% off everything when you sign up as a new VIP!
➜ Stay hydrated on the go this summer at LiquidIV.com and use code CAMPCOUNSELORS to get 20% off your first purchase!
➜ Stop settling for wines that don’t quite hit the mark! Head to TryFirstleaf.com/camp to get 50% off your first box PLUS free shipping for an entire year.
➜ This Father’s Day, give Dad a gift that captures who he really is. Order now and save up to $20 at StoryWorth.com/counselors
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
➜ Talk it out, with BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/CAMP

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!
Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories!
Camp Songs: Listen on Spotify here or Listen online here!
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
8 June 2026, 8:00 am
1 hour 3 minutes
184 - Cable Box Divas
In this episode we YEARN for cable TV. Disney Channel, Nickelodeon, ABC Family (then turning into freeform? like what was that??) and the list goes on an on and on like a scrolling tv guide. We also cover the news story of a grandma's prom obsession dreams coming true, and a hot air balloon flopp yet again.... ugh. Lots to do lots to say!
This episode was edited and mixed by Kevin Betts.
Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Explore everything Camp Shady Birch has to offer at CampShadyBirch.com!
Sponsors:
➜ This year, give Dad a gift that captures who he really is! Order StoryWorth RIGHT NOW and save up to $20 at StoryWorth.com/counselors
➜ Go to Progressive.com to see if you could save on insurance.
Works Cited:
➜ Flintrop, Crystal. “Teen Fulfills Lifelong Promise of Taking His Grandmother to Prom: ‘It’s Her Dream.’” KBTX, 4 May 2026.
➜ “Mind If We Drop In? Hot Air Balloon with 13 Aboard Makes Emergency Landing in California Backyard.” NBC News, 20 Apr. 2026.
Camp Songs:
Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape
Social Media:
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
3 June 2026, 8:00 am
More Episodes? Get the App