This week, Ash sits down with Tom Cronin, meditation teacher and international speaker, for a deeply honest conversation about what it really looks like to hold everything together on the outside while quietly falling apart within. Tom opens up about the two parallel lives he was living during his 26 years in the high pressure world of global financial markets, one of outward success, pinstripe suits, and Bondi beachside living, and another of crippling anxiety, panic attacks, chronic insomnia, depression, and a growing reliance on drugs and alcohol that eventually led to a breakdown at age 29.

It was from that rock bottom that Tom discovered Vedic meditation, a practice that not only transformed his mental health but ultimately became the foundation of an entirely new life and purpose.

Ash and Tom explore the science of stress, why alcohol numbs but never heals, and how meditation actually expands brain function rather than impairing it. Tom shares the journey from seeker to finder to sharer, including the challenges of leaving the golden handcuffs of finance behind, producing his feature film The Portal, and building his mission to inspire a billion people to meditate daily.

The conversation weaves through ego, ego transcendence, contribution, and the holistic practices Tom uses to remain grounded and performing at his best. It is a rich and wide-ranging episode about the courage it takes to change course, the intelligence of the body's warning signals, and the profound freedom that comes from finally looking inward.

Episode chapters:

00:07 Introducing Tom Cronin

04:44 Hiding Behind the Smile: Life on the Trading Room Floor

06:16 Shame, Guilt, and the North Star

11:48 The Golden Handcuffs

12:54 When Drugs and Alcohol Entered the Picture

15:53 Rock Bottom and the Rashi

18:06 The Breakdown and the Turning Point

20:09 Discovering Vedic Meditation

24:46 The Allostatic Load and Why Alcohol Does Not De-stress

28:43 Why Sobriety Supercharges Meditation

33:37 From Seeker to Finder to Sharer

35:44 Leaving Finance and Leaping into Purpose

38:08 Navigating Challenges with Meditation as a Tool

41:09 The Stillness Project and the Making of The Portal

46:45 The Importance of Service and Contribution

49:02 B1G1: Giving Back Through Business

54:05 Three Non-Negotiables for a Happy, Authentic Life

Connect with Tom:

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/stillnessproject

Website: http://www.tomcronin.com/

Tom's free book to reduce anxiety and depression https://tomcronin.com/free-calm-book/

Socials:

https://www.instagram.com/tomcronin/

https://www.facebook.com/tomcronincoach

https://www.linkedin.com/in/tomcronin1/

https://www.tiktok.com/@_tomcronin_ 

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Renewal Ritual | September 13th | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How much longer are you willing to suffer before something changes?

In this powerful solo episode, Ash explores a recurring theme she’s been discussing with people lately: have you truly had enough? Because whether it's alcohol, a relationship, a career, perfectionism, or an old way of thinking, lasting change rarely happens until we're willing to let go of the ideas, stories, and identities that are keeping us stuck.

Drawing on her own recovery journey, Ash speaks candidly about the gift of desperation, the stigma surrounding the word alcoholic, and why so many of us continue negotiating with our own suffering long after we've realised something isn't working. She shares what it really takes to create meaningful change and why partial willingness often keeps us trapped in the very cycles we're desperate to escape.

This conversation extends far beyond sobriety, inviting listeners to honestly examine where fear, familiarity, and old beliefs may be preventing them from stepping into a more authentic life.

Ash also reflects on celebrating her first wedding anniversary and the unexpected lessons that came from eloping in Italy, including a deeper understanding of people pleasing, self-worth, and the quiet cost of abandoning ourselves to keep others comfortable. She shares why esteemable acts are one of the most powerful ways to build genuine self-worth and how authentic relationships are forged when we stop performing for approval.

Plus, Ash leaves listeners with five thought-provoking journal prompts designed to help you uncover where you may be ready, or almost ready, to finally let go.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Bali Retreat Announcement

01:12 Life Update: A Busy Week and a Wedding Anniversary

03:31 Elopement in Italy and Lessons in People Pleasing

05:53 The Hidden Cost of Saying Yes When You Mean No

08:12 Building Self-Worth Through Esteemable Acts

10:33 Have You Had Enough?

12:53 What It Really Takes to Be Ready for Change

15:16 Breaking the Stigma Around Alcoholism

17:39 The Power of Identification and Finding Your People

19:56 Sobriety as a Superpower

22:18 The Gift of Desperation

24:26 Divine Timing and Letting Go of Old Ideas

26:48 The Difference Between Pain and Suffering

29:09 Reflective Journal Prompts to Provoke Change

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Renewal Ritual | September 13th | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash welcomes back her sober soul sister Danni Carr, for a wide ranging chat on Bali, yoga, and the spiritual practices that underpin their sobriety. Danni shares the Balinese philosophy of Tri Hita Karana, the three-part connection to the divine, community, and land that keeps life in balance, and reflects on how a once reluctant relationship with yoga, born from hungover gym sessions and stormed out shavasanas, slowly became the foundation of her recovery and her sense of coming home to herself.

The conversation moves into deeper territory as Danni and Ash explore what the divine means to them now, the science behind spiritual practice and the brain, and the unexpected friendships that sobriety has made possible. Danni speaks candidly about needing daily practice not to recover but to keep expanding and staying regulated, and reminds listeners that spirituality doesn't have to be serious or precise to be powerful.

It’s a heartfelt conversation between two friends about connection, consistency, and choosing a life that feels good without needing to numb out to get there.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Reconnecting in Bali: A Spiritual Journey

03:56 The Balinese Philosophy of Trihitakarana

07:23 Cultural Immersion: Sharing Bali's Rich Heritage

11:59 The Transformative Power of Yoga

18:55 Finding Stillness: The Challenge of Shivasana

21:17 Embracing Autonomy in Yoga Practice

22:45 Finding the Right Teachers

24:07 Provoking Thought Through Stillness

25:51 Navigating Friendships in Sobriety

28:56 The Importance of Consistency in Recovery

32:27 Spirituality as a Foundation for Sobriety

34:16 Understanding the Divine

37:05 The Value of Connection and Community

37:48 Finding Joy in Spiritual Practices

You can connect with Danni through:

Check out Danni’s 4 Week Sober & Transformational Challenge 

IG: @howiquitalcohol 

Recommendations:

The Awakened Brain by Lisa Miller 

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Renewal Ritual | September 13th | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash drops in with a mini solo episode to share a life update from her recent trip to Bali and to offer something she herself has been craving - a guided meditation to help you reset. She reflects on attending the AA convention, what it’s like to travel sober after years of using airports and planes as a reason to drink, and the joy of being surrounded by like-minded people who truly understand the recovery journey. She also speaks about the not so pleasant reality of getting Bali Belly, and the lessons in surrender, self-care, and taking quick action. 

For the first time on the podcast, Ash is also sharing a guided meditation. One she specifically wrote for her Behind The Smile listeners. A 10-minute guided meditation designed to bring you back to yourself, whether you’re at home, walking, or listening on the go, offering a simple way to slow down, breathe, and reconnect with what actually matters today.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Welcome, Intentions & Gratitude

00:56 Post‑Bali Life Update & Mini Solo Setup

02:10 Bali AA Convention & Joy of Sober Travel

03:11 Sunur, Ubud & Favorite Bali Rituals

05:32 Ubud Hotel Recos, Monkey Story & Bali Belly

10:11 Calling the Doctor & Reframing “What a Gift”

12:32 Coming Home Gently & Loving Life You Don’t Need a Holiday From

14:54 Returning to Meditation & Idea for a “Reset”

17:19 Guided 10‑Minute Reset Meditation

27:14 Final Reflections, Gratitude & Call to Action

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with psychic, healer and mindset coach Shanaye Kuntze for a raw conversation about burnout, self-worth, intuition and the journey back to self. Behind a successful business and years spent helping others, Shanaye found herself completely burnt out, bed-ridden, disconnected and unable to keep going. Together, Ash and Shanaye unpack the hidden ways childhood wounds and the search for love and approval can shape our lives, careers and sense of self.

Shanaye shares how breathwork became the catalyst for profound healing and the awakening of her psychic gifts, opening the door to deeper intuition, purpose and trust in herself. They explore boundaries, rest, alignment and what it really means to create a life that feels good, not just one that looks good.

This is a powerful conversation about slowing down, listening inward, and finding the courage to follow the voice within.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Shanaye Kuntze

02:48 Navigating Burnout and Its Impact

05:55 The Energy of Doing What You Love

08:59 The Importance of Boundaries

11:55 Hiding Behind a Smile: Shanaye's Photo Reflection

14:54 The Journey Through Burnout

18:06 The Path to Healing and Self-Discovery

21:02 The Role of Competitive Sports in Shanae's Life

24:05 Transitioning from Sports to Fitness Coaching

27:02 The Addiction to Work and Its Consequences

29:46 Finding Light After Rock Bottom

31:15 The Awakening to Breathwork

34:43 Unleashing Psychic Abilities

36:44 Creating Space for Transformation

40:27 Deepening the Breathwork Experience

43:01 The Power of Vulnerability in Community

46:02 Communicating with Spirit Guides

52:17 Reflections on Transformation

55:17 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

You can connect with Shanaye through:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/skbodyworks

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/skbodyworks/

Website: https://skbodyworks.com.au

Podcast: (Apple) https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-gym-tonic-podcast/id1743895889 (Spotify) https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-gym-tonic-podcast/id1743895889

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here NOW SOLD OUT!

Next Ritual coming in September. Details launching soon.

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash shares a sneak peak into her memoir she's currently writing, tracing how her spiritual life has evolved in recovery. What began as skepticism and resistance toward anything “spiritual” has slowly become the foundation of her day-to-day life, influencing how she relates to herself, others, and the world around her.

She opens up about moving from a place of self-hatred, numbing, and constant chasing to an inner landscape shaped by simple, consistent practices like prayer, meditation, gratitude, and quiet acts of service. Ash reflects on how spirituality, for her, isn’t about being “woo-woo” or giving up ambition or joy, but about how you live when no one is watching and how kindly you speak to yourself when things are hard.

At its heart, this episode invites listeners to reconsider what spirituality might look like in their own lives, whether they’re on a sober path, a healing journey, or simply curious about something deeper.

Episode Chapters:

00:00 Welcome, Intentions & Gratitude

00:56 Memoir Writing & Bali Setup

03:14 Spirituality as the Foundation of Sobriety

05:39 From Non‑Believer to Spiritual Seeker

08:04 Redefining a Higher Power in Recovery

10:26 Gift of Desperation & Early God Experiments

12:48 Daily Prayer, Gratitude & Relationship with God

15:01 Meditation, Listening & Two‑Way Prayer

17:25 Depositing into the Spiritual Bank

19:42 Spiritual Solution to Alcoholism & Old Patterns

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with Alisha Burns, founder of Solo Mum Society, to talk about the deeply personal road that led her to motherhood on her own terms. Alisha shares the heartbreak of infertility, the emotional weight of hidden struggles, and the quiet strength it took to move through a life that often looked fine from the outside while feeling very different underneath.

She opens up about the role alcohol played in her life, the pressure of social expectations, and the long process of learning to trust herself again. Ash and Alisha explore what it means to choose donor conception, to step into solo motherhood by choice, and to build a life that feels honest, intentional, and aligned with who you really are.

Throughout the conversation, Alisha reflects on the changing shape of family, the power of community support, and the liberation that can come from letting go of the version of life you thought you were meant to have. At its heart, this episode is about grief, growth, and the courage to create a future rooted in authenticity, independence, and love.

Trigger Warning: This episode discusses pregnancy loss. 

Episode chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Alicia Burns and Her Journey

03:01 Navigating Motherhood and Business

06:01 Hiding Behind a Smile: Alicia's Photo Reflection

09:11 Infertility Struggles and Emotional Toll

12:09 The Impact of Alcohol on Coping Mechanisms

15:04 The End of a Marriage and New Beginnings

17:58 Finding Strength in Adversity

20:53 The Journey to Motherhood: Donor Conception

23:48 Overcoming Challenges and Embracing Change

30:45 The Journey of Single Motherhood

32:08 Navigating Isolation and Connection

34:29 The Impact of Alcohol Culture

38:52 Realizations and Transformations

43:35 Embracing Independence and Self-Discovery

46:25 The Changing Landscape of Family Dynamics

49:54 Empowerment Through Intentional Choices

52:46 Building Community and Support

54:40 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

Website - www.solomumsociety.com

Instagram - @noneedforprincecharming

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here 

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with holistic psychologist Laura Corcoran to unpack what really happened inside The Embodied Woman retreat. Over four days on the Gold Coast, sixteen women arrived as strangers and left having cracked open years of armour, people pleasing, perfectionism, and emotional suppression.

Ash and Laura reflect on the moments that shifted everything, from the resistance and fear women carried on day one, to the tears, breakthroughs, nervous system releases, and deep honesty that unfolded as the weekend progressed. They speak about why so many women feel disconnected from themselves, how high functioning coping mechanisms keep us stuck, and what happens when you finally feel safe enough to be fully seen.

This conversation explores embodiment, sisterhood, emotional healing, relationships, boundaries, identity, and the power of being in a room where masks are no longer needed. Ash and Laura also share why transformation happens so quickly in immersive spaces like this, and why the women who attended are already making powerful changes in their lives back home.

If you’ve ever felt exhausted from holding it all together, disconnected from yourself, or like you’re craving something deeper than surface level self development, this episode is for you.

For more information on The Embodied Woman Retreat 2027 you can send Ash a message on IG here, or email [email protected]

Episode Chapters:

00:00 The Energy of the Retreat

02:58 Integration and Connection

06:00 Creating a Safe Space

08:59 Meeting Your Edge

11:53 Transformation Through Action

15:04 Intergenerational Healing

17:56 The Power of Vulnerability

20:59 Sisterhood and Support

24:01 Reflections on the Experience

28:33 Connection and Community in Retreats

30:10 Overcoming Personal Challenges

32:06 Emotional Vulnerability and Heart Opening

33:13 Facing Uncertainty and Embracing Change

36:32 The Journey of Growth and Transformation

38:19 The Power of Embodied Experiences

39:20 Announcing the Next Retreat

Reach out to Laura - @hersuccessfulmind

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with Rosie Eldershaw, a country girl turned Melburnian who recently celebrated three years of sobriety after multiple rehabs and several near-fatal rock bottoms. Rosie shares how her drinking progressed from nightly wine to 24/7 spirits and drugs, and how she kept a bubbly, high-functioning facade while quietly falling apart inside. She speaks honestly about seizures, the shame of drinking hand sanitiser and mouthwash, and the terror of knowing something was very wrong but feeling powerless to stop.

Rosie reflects on the turning points that finally stuck: finding a 12-step program, allowing others to help, and building a simple, peaceful life she genuinely enjoys with yoga, dog parks, her partner and her dog. This is a grounded, hopeful conversation about ownership, spirituality, and the non-negotiables that now protect her sobriety and happiness.

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Journey of Transformation

03:01 Rosie's Story of Sobriety

05:56 The Struggles Behind the Smile

08:57 The Dangerous Path of Alcoholism

12:07 Childhood and Early Influences

14:48 The Progression of Drinking

17:58 Family Concerns and Consequences

20:54 The Desperation of Addiction

23:55 The Journey to Rehab

26:28 The Journey Through Rehab

29:00 The Turning Point: A Meeting That Changed Everything

32:52 Embracing Spirituality in Recovery

36:57 Overcoming the Ego: Finding a Higher Power

40:46 Living One Day at a Time

46:29 Building Healthy Relationships in Sobriety

53:24 Non-Negotiables for a Happy Life

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash returns with a solo episode that’s felt long overdue. After a season of slowing down and stepping back, she’s back behind the mic on her own, not with all the answers, but with a deeper level of honesty about what it really means to accept life as it is.

Drawing on yoga philosophy, recovery, and her own lived experience, Ash explores the tension between control and surrender. She opens up about her patterns of perfectionism, the need to hold everything together, and the unexpected peace that came when she finally softened her grip.

This is a deeply personal reflection on relationships, family dynamics, and the moments that still stir old wounds. Ash also shares her experience navigating motherhood, fertility, and loss, and how these chapters have shaped her understanding of acceptance in a way no theory ever could.

If you’ve been trying to control outcomes, fix everything, or push against what is, this episode offers a different way.

A gentle reminder that peace isn’t found in having it all figured out, but in learning to meet yourself exactly where you are.

Episode chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Intentions

00:57 Embracing Vulnerability in Solo Episodes

04:03 The Journey of Acceptance

10:10 Letting Go of Control

15:00 Navigating Relationships with Acceptance

20:04 The Spiritual Journey and Personal Growth

24:53 Conclusion and Call to Action

Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join.

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Ash sits down with embodied dance artist and coach Taylah King, whose journey from darkness to rediscovery is both heart-wrenching and deeply inspiring. Taylah opens up about her twelve-year relationship and marriage that began in childhood, the growing inner whisper that something wasn't right, and the vulnerability of walking away from the only safety she'd ever known. From alcohol abuse that started at fourteen to a drug-induced psychosis triggered by ayahuasca, Taylah shares candidly about spending two years dissociated from reality, convinced she was dead, and trapped in a mental health crisis that felt inescapable.

She reflects on the terrifying experience of psychosis, the inadequacy of traditional mental health support, and the overwhelming loneliness of not knowing if she'd ever come back. Taylah describes the turning point that changed everything: surrendering to faith, working with a mentor, and falling in love for the first time while sober, which allowed her to finally feel again after years of numbness. Throughout their conversation, Ash and Taylah explore the danger of spiritual bypassing, the power of embodiment practices, and the importance of learning to listen to your nervous system instead of seeking answers outside yourself.

Today, Taylah uses dance and movement as medicine, helping others reconnect to their bodies and move freely in the world without substances. Her story is a powerful reminder that even in the deepest darkness, there is always a way back home to yourself.

Episode Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Taylah's Journey

02:56 Rediscovery Through Dance

06:05 The Struggles Behind the Smile

09:02 Substance Abuse and Its Impact

12:01 The Role of Ayahuasca in Healing

14:58 Experiencing Psychosis

17:55 The Aftermath of Psychosis

21:02 Finding Freedom in Movement

30:11 The Journey Through Psychosis

34:01 Spiritual Awakening and Healing

39:12 The Role of Love and Relationships in Recovery

43:10 Embodiment and Self-Connection

51:13 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life

You can connect with Taylah using the links below:

Instagram: @taylahkingmovement

Follow and connect with Ash on: 

⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss

TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb

Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com

Upcoming Workshops:

The Reconnection Ritual | June 21st | Buy Tickets Here

Join Ash on retreat in 2026!

The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 

Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026

Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.