We've all done it. Avoided the conversation, hoped the problem would magically disappear, or convinced ourselves that someone should just know what we need without us having to actually say it.

And how's that working out?

The truth is, the conversations we avoid don't go away. They take up space, create resentment, damage relationships, and sometimes turn a relatively small issue into a full-blown shitshow.

In this episode of This Is Woman's Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with Christina Wing, Harvard Business School senior lecturer and author of Unspeakable: The Taboo Topics We Avoid and How to Talk About Them, to explore why we're so damn uncomfortable talking about the things that matter most.

In this episode, they discuss:

• Why avoiding uncomfortable conversations often creates bigger problems than having them.

• How talking about someone instead of to them can fuel resentment and unnecessary drama.

• Why money conversations feel so personal and how to separate financial circumstances from self-worth.

• The difference between a difficult conversation and a difficult moment.

• How to recognize when it's your place to speak up and when it's better to stay out of it.

• What to do when someone becomes defensive or refuses to engage.

• Why everyday annoyances can turn into major relationship problems when left unaddressed.

• The two biggest mistakes people make when approaching difficult conversations.

• Why conversations about estate planning, death, and our final wishes need to happen sooner rather than later.

Having the conversation doesn't guarantee we'll get the outcome we want. But avoiding it almost guarantees we won't have a voice in what happens next.

Because sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is stop overthinking, stop rehearsing, and just say the damn thing.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW  and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

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Connect with Christina: 

Website: https://www.christinawing.com/ 

Book: https://www.christinawing.com/book/ 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/christina.r.wing/ 

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• 195 / Finding (And Using) Your Voice with Amy Green Smith 

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For years, remote work has felt like a win. No commute, more flexibility, fewer pointless hours spent proving we're working simply because someone can see us. And for women, especially caregivers, that flexibility can be a game changer.

But what if there's a downside we're not talking about enough?

In this episode of This Is Woman's Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with economist Natalia Emanuel, co-author of In Person: How Working Together Fuels Creativity, Productivity, and Growth, to challenge some deeply held beliefs about remote work.

In this episode, they discuss:

• Why working face-to-face can improve learning, creativity, and career advancement.

• The surprising connection between remote work, isolation, and mental health.

• Why being in the office isn't the same as meaningful in-person collaboration.

• How remote work can disadvantage younger employees and those starting new roles.

• Why mentorship and workplace culture need to be valued and rewarded.

• The complicated trade-offs between workplace flexibility and caregiving responsibilities.

• Five factors organizations should consider when deciding how much in-person work is necessary.

• Why predictable schedules and workday social activities matter, especially for women.

• How AI could make human connection even more valuable.

The answer isn't all remote or all in person. It's about being intentional with our time, challenging outdated workplace expectations, and creating environments where people can actually thrive.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW  and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Natalia: 

Website:https://www.nataliaemanuel.com/ 

Book: https://inpersonbook.com/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nataliaemanuel?trk=public_post_feed-actor-name 

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Somewhere along the way, emergency preparedness got hijacked by doomsday prepping, conspiracy theories, stockpiles of ammo, and a truly unnecessary amount of camouflage. But emergencies themselves? Not exactly far-fetched. Power outages, extreme weather, wildfires, floods, earthquakes, pandemics - shit happens. Being prepared for it isn’t paranoid. It’s practical.

Amy Edelman and Chris Begley are the co-authors of The Emergency Playbook: A Bunker-Free Guide to Disaster Preparation. Amy is the founder of IndieReader and Pretty Prepared, while Chris is an archaeologist, professor, wilderness survival instructor, National Geographic Explorer, and author of The Next Apocalypse. Together, they’re making emergency preparedness less about fear and more about confidence, common sense.

We explore:

• How to create an emergency preparedness plan without spiraling into worst-case-scenario anxiety

• The most likely emergencies households should actually prepare for

• Why the best first step costs absolutely nothing: make a plan

• What every household should have on hand for power outages and natural disasters and what belongs in a go bag

• Why knowing your neighbors and building community may matter more than stockpiling gear

• The survival skills that can be more valuable than expensive emergency equipment

• How to prepare for pets, children, older family members, disabilities, and different mobility needs

• Why freaking out and failing to plan are two of the biggest mistakes people make during an emergency

• The surprisingly important role of chocolate, coffee, candy, and other morale boosters

The goal isn’t to prepare for every single terrible thing that could possibly happen. The goal is to prepare for what’s reasonably likely, build useful skills, communicate with the people who matter, and create enough of a plan that fear doesn’t get to run the show.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW  and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Amy & Chris:

Book: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/781838/the-emergency-playbook-by-amy-edelman-and-chris-begley/ 

Amy’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/pretty.prepared/ 

Amy’s Substack: https://prettyprepared.substack.com/p/how-to-stop-feeling-anxious-about 

Chris’ Website: https://explorationfound.wixsite.com/chrisbegley 

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• Survival Is Woman’s Work with Kathy Giusti | 391

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• The Fourth Trauma Response You’ve Never Heard Of (And How It’s Running Your Life) with Dr. Ingrid Clayton | 342

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Domestic violence doesn’t always start with a punch. It often starts quietly, with control disguised as concern, isolation disguised as love, and boundaries being chipped away so slowly that it can be hard to recognize what’s happening until the danger is very real.

Denise Brown knows this in the most devastating way possible. Her sister, Nicole Brown Simpson, was murdered in 1994 after experiencing domestic violence in her marriage. For more than 30 years, Denise has dedicated her life to domestic violence awareness, victim advocacy, education, and helping women recognize the warning signs she wishes she had understood then. Her new book, For My Sister Nicole: Love Shouldn’t Hurt, shares Nicole’s story while giving victims, survivors, families, and friends resources that could save lives.

In this episode, Nicole and Denise discuss:

• Why domestic violence is about power and control—and why it can happen to strong, independent women

• The early warning signs of an abusive relationship that are easy to dismiss or explain away

• Why victims may hide abuse to protect their children, family, friends, pets—or even their abuser

• The hope, shame, and fear that can make leaving an abusive relationship incredibly complicated

• How friends and family can support someone experiencing domestic violence without trying to control their decisions

• The importance of safety planning and working with domestic violence shelters when preparing to leave

• Why calling 911, documenting abuse, and creating a paper trail can matter

• The Domestic Violence Bill of Rights—and the reminder that everyone has the right to safety, respect, their own opinions, and the word “no”

This is a hard conversation, but it’s an important one. Because love should never require someone to live in fear, walk on eggshells, surrender their autonomy, or make themselves smaller to stay safe.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline has trained advocates available 24/7 at 1-800-799-SAFE, by texting START to 88788, or at TheHotline.org.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW  and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Denise:

Website: https://denisebrown.com/ 

Book: https://www.amazon.com/My-Sister-Nicole-Julie-McCarron/dp/B0FXYCGS99 

FB: https://www.facebook.com/DeniseBrownToo 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/DeniseBrownToo 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/denise-brown-6644762 

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Charisma. Some people seem to walk into a room and just have it. People lean in, listen, remember them, and want more time with them. And for those of us who are introverts? Well, it can be easy to assume we were simply left out of the charisma lottery.

But what if charisma isn’t something we’re born with? What if it’s something we can actually learn?

In this episode, Nicole sits down with Olivia Fox Cabane, one of the world’s leading authorities on the science of charisma and bestselling author of The Charisma Myth. Olivia has taught and lectured at Stanford, Harvard, Yale, MIT, and the United Nations and has worked with leaders at companies including Google, Deloitte, TikTok, and Airbnb.

They discuss:

• Why charisma is different from charm and likability

• The science showing that charisma can actually be learned

• Why there isn’t one “right” kind of charisma

• The potential downsides of becoming more charismatic

• Why introverts may have a major charisma advantage

• The three components of charisma: presence, power, and warmth

• Why self-criticism makes it harder to stay present and connected

• How instant self-forgiveness can help us recover from awkward moments

• Why mistakes can actually make us more relatable

• Why taking up space matters when communicating power

• How vocal patterns like uptalk can affect perceived authority and credibility

• The difference between being nice and being kind

• Why the harsher the message, the warmer the delivery should be

• How intent and impact can help distinguish influence from harmful manipulation

• How charisma can exist without likability

• Why learning charisma doesn’t require becoming someone else

The goal isn’t to walk into a room and make everyone think, Wow, she’s charismatic. It’s to stop borrowing somebody else’s magnetism and start trusting our own.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Olivia:

Website: https://www.oliviafoxcabane.com/ 

Book: https://www.charismamyth.com/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ofc/ 

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We spend a whole lot of time thinking about how other people perceive us. How we communicate, present, negotiate, network, make a good impression, say the right thing at the right time. Basically, we put a lot of effort into being interesting.

But what if we spent more time being interested?

Because entire conversations are happening around us that have nothing to do with what anyone is actually saying. And we might be missing all of it because we’re too busy planning the next brilliant thing we’re going to say.

In this episode, Nicole sits down with Pamela Meyer, a leading expert on deception detection who trains executives and institutional leaders on information elicitation, social observation, and insider threat mitigation. She’s also the author of How to Read the Room: The Art and Science of Social Observation.

They discuss:

• Why being confident in our ability to read a room doesn’t mean we’re actually good at it

• Why talking less can help us notice more

• How our own ego, biases, and needs distort what we observe

• Why asking “How can I make this room better?” can change an interaction

• Pamela’s “Triple B” method: background, behavior, and beliefs

• What to watch immediately after conflict happens

• How to identify informal power and influence in a room

• The back-pocket questions that can reveal what people are really thinking

• Why crossed arms, eye contact, and other body language “rules” can mislead us

• Why clusters of behavior matter more than individual gestures

• Verbal and nonverbal signals that may warrant closer attention when deception is suspected

• How to avoid confusing anxiety or nervousness with dishonesty

• Why context, curiosity, and giving people the benefit of the doubt matter

Maybe the most powerful person in the room isn’t the one talking the most. Maybe it’s the one paying attention.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Pamela:

Website: https://PamelaMeyer.com 

Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250378230?lv=shuf&channelId=500&plpRedirect=mhFallback 

X: https://x.com/Pamela_Meyer 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/pamelameyer 

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What if the problem isn’t that there aren’t enough hours in the day, but that we’re giving too many of them away?

For a long time, doing more was practically a badge of honor. More meetings. More preparation. More polishing. More yeses. More proving. And while all that effort might get results, it can also leave us burnt out, resentful, and wondering why the hell we’re working this hard when technology was supposed to make our lives easier.

In this episode, Nicole sits down with Fran Hauser, leading career expert, champion of women in the workplace, former President of Digital at Time Inc., startup investor, and acclaimed author of 20 Minutes Is the New Hour: The Ambitious Woman’s Guide to Doing Less and Achieving More.

They discuss:

• Why 20 minutes might actually be enough for that hour-long meeting

• The four P’s stealing our time: perfectionism, people pleasing, procrastination, and padding

• How people pleasing creates overwhelm, burnout, and resentment

• The power of pausing before automatically saying yes

• Why saying yes to every opportunity can actually work against women professionally

• How to recognize what’s underneath procrastination

• Why starting messy can create momentum

• How shorter timelines can force clarity and keep perfectionism from taking over

• The difference between Chronos and Kairos

• How leaders can experiment with shorter meetings and meeting-free time

• Why doing less isn’t about caring less—it’s about being intentional with our most precious resource

The goal isn’t to reclaim 40 minutes from a meeting just to squeeze two more meetings into the space. It’s to stop giving away so much of our time to habits, expectations, and systems that don’t deserve it.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Fran:

Website: https://www.franhauser.com/ 

Book: https://www.franhauser.com/twentyminutes 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/fran_hauser/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/franhauser/ 

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“Just stay positive” might be some of the most useless advice ever given when life is falling apart.

Because resilient optimism isn’t pretending everything is fine, ignoring reality, or slapping a silver lining on something that just plain sucks. It’s believing that even when we can’t control what happens, we still have agency over what we do next.

Michelle Gielan is a positive psychology researcher, bestselling author of Broadcasting Happiness, former CBS Morning News anchor, and author of Resilient Optimism: The Science of Sustaining a Positive Mindset in Tough Times. Her research explores how optimism impacts happiness, resilience, performance, productivity, and our ability to navigate stress, uncertainty, setbacks, and change.

In this episode, Michelle and Nicole unpack why optimism isn’t just a feeling — it’s a behavior. 

We explore:

• What resilient optimism is — and how it differs from toxic positivity

• Why optimism is a behavior we can practice, not just a personality trait

• How to hold two truths at once with a “yes, and” mindset

• Why our brains naturally focus on threats and negative information

• The five trainable behaviors of resilient optimists

• How to recalibrate perspective without ignoring reality

• Why strategic rest and recovery can improve performance

• The impact of negative news, social media, and our information diet

• Why relationships and social connection are critical to happiness and optimism

Optimism isn’t believing everything will work out exactly the way we want. It’s believing there’s still something worth doing before we know how the story ends.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Michelle:

Book: https://www.resilientoptimism.com/ 

Substack: https://michellegielan.substack.com/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michellegielan/ 

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Work isn’t exactly working for women.

We have more opportunities, more impressive titles, more responsibility, and more ways to succeed than generations before us. And yet, a whole lot of successful women are exhausted, overwhelmed, underutilized, and wondering: Is this really as good as it gets?

Dr. Helen Krug von Nidda is an executive coach, licensed career counselor, Stanford University instructor, and author of Closing the Fulfillment Gap. She’s spent more than 20 years helping women navigate their careers and create work lives that actually fit who they are today — not who they were when they started climbing the damn ladder.

In this episode, Helen and Nicole unpack the “fulfillment gap” — the distance between what women expected successful careers to feel like and what they’re actually experiencing. 

We explore:

• Why women can be successful at work and still feel deeply unfulfilled

• How autonomy, connection, and competence influence fulfillment

• Why what fulfills women changes throughout different career and life stages

• The MOVE framework for creating a more fulfilling career

• How values can serve as breadcrumbs when the bigger vision isn’t clear

• Why knowing what you don’t want can help clarify what you do

• The surprising power of “weak ties” and expanding professional networks

• Small career changes women can make now to start closing the fulfillment gap

Fulfillment isn’t something waiting at the top of the ladder, and it probably isn’t hiding inside the next promotion either. Women may not control every workplace, leader, system, or outcome — but they do have power over what they pursue, tolerate, change, and choose.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Helen:

IG: https://www.instagram.com/with.dr.helen/ 

Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GT9YPC9C/ 

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helenkrugvonnidda/ 

Substack: https://substack.com/@withhelen https://www.with-helen.com/ 

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We love a comeback story. The recovery after the diagnosis. The victory after the struggle. The inspiring lesson wrapped up with a pretty bow and, preferably, some flattering lighting.

But what about when you’re still in it?

Allison Sweet Grant was barely 40, a mother of three, and just beginning her literary career when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Her memoir, Lump: A Memoir in Ineloquent Reflections, tells the truth about breast cancer treatment and recovery without cleaning it up for public consumption. There’s fear and hope. Gratitude and anger. Humor and grief. 

In this episode, Allison and Nicole talk about the messy emotional reality of a breast cancer diagnosis, chemotherapy and cancer recovery, including the pressure to stay positive, the complicated role of caregivers, and why gratitude doesn’t cancel out grief.

We explore:

• Why gratitude, grief, fear, anger, humor, and hope can all exist at once

• The pressure cancer patients can feel to stay positive or find the “silver lining”

• How cancer affects spouses, children, caregivers, and the entire family

• Why humor and sarcasm can be powerful coping mechanisms during difficult experiences

• How the need to be liked or seen as a “good patient” can keep women from asking important questions

• Why bringing an advocate to medical appointments can make a difference

• How fear influences major healthcare decisions — and why Allison wishes she had paused more

• The ongoing fear of cancer recurrence and what it means to live in the complicated space between patient and survivor

Because the truth doesn’t need to be positive, polished, perfect, or profound to be worth telling.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Allison:

Website: https://www.allisonsweetgrant.com/ 

Book: https://www.amazon.com/Lump-Reflections-Allison-Sweet-Grant-ebook/dp/B0GL1H4FJL/ 

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Society doesn’t just tell girls who they’re supposed to be. It tells boys who they’re supposed to be too. Different rules, different consequences—but they’re still boxes asking our kids to perform who they’re supposed to be instead of discovering who they actually are.

In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole Kalil welcomes back Dr. Shefali, world-renowned clinical psychologist, multiple New York Times bestselling author, founder of the Conscious Parenting Movement, and author of two new books, Raising Conscious Daughters and Raising Conscious Sons.

And while there’s plenty to say about raising confident girls, this conversation spends significant time on what boys need from parents in a culture sending them increasingly confusing messages about masculinity.

They explore:

• What parents are getting wrong about raising boys today

• What “integrated masculinity” looks like and why boys need healthier models of manhood

• How parents can help boys navigate social media, pornography, the manosphere, and toxic masculinity

• Why mentorship and positive male role models matter

• What boys may be seeking through video games, online communities, and bro culture

• How movement, purpose, contribution, and connection can support boys’ emotional health

• How to help boys experience and express anger without shaming their emotions or allowing harmful behavior

• How girls are still being taught to seek approval—even when it’s packaged as empowerment

• Why parents need to examine their own emotional baggage and achievement expectations

Because raising kids who know who they are—and get to decide who they become—that’s the work of a parent.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to HeyPolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 40% off your first year

Connect with Dr. Shefali:

Website: https://www.drshefali.com/raisingconscious-daughters-sons/ 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/doctorshefali/?hl=en 

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@doctorshefali 

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@doctorshefali 

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Share the Love:

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