A weekly podcast on parenting teens and launching them into the world. Hosted by Jessica Pfeiffer with Dr. Ken Wilgus, author of the book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You."
Cynthia and Dr. Ken dive into one of the biggest parenting struggles right now—adolescents and their phones. From screen time issues to kids finding creative ways around the rules (hello, burner phones and smartwatches), it’s clear this isn’t going anywhere.
Dr. Ken reframes the whole conversation by reminding us this isn’t about controlling phones—it’s about raising young adults. That means setting clear limits (like when phones aren’t allowed), expecting pushback, and holding boundaries without being shocked when they try to get around them.
We also talk about what doesn’t work (reward systems and over-controlling) and what actually helps—shifting toward conversations, ownership, and preparing them for life after your house. And of course, we hit the frustration every parent feels—when they’re technically following the rules but still glued to their phone.
If this is a struggle in your house, you’re not alone—and this episode will help you think about it in a healthier, more realistic way.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
We’re back for week three of our marriage series, and Dr. Ken and Cynthia kick things off with some true-or-false questions that prove how much questionable marriage advice is out there. From “marriage should feel easy” to “never go to bed angry,” we sort through what actually holds up and what doesn’t.
From there, the conversation shifts to a bigger idea: maybe marriage isn’t mainly about being happy or compatible. Dr. Ken talks about how Scripture frames marriage as something that reflects Christ and the Church—which is a very different way to look at everyday frustrations, misunderstandings, and seasons where you feel like you’ve grown apart.
They also talk about what that looks like practically—how to think about your role in marriage, how to approach conflict differently, and why constantly looking for better techniques might miss the point.
No quick fixes, no five-step plan—just a better way to think about what’s actually going on.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
This week, Cynthia and Dr. Ken continue their three-part series on marriage by unpacking some of the most common misunderstandings couples bring into relationships and what actually strengthens connection over time.
From questionable advice heard in church classes to the classic “never go to bed angry” rule, the conversation starts with a few laughs before getting into why so many couples feel disconnected even when they genuinely want the same thing.
Throughout the conversation, Dr. Ken addresses the fears many couples bring into marriage. Wives often fear being alone or unseen, while husbands often fear they’re failing or not measuring up. When those realities go unrecognized, even everyday conversations can turn into frustration. Dr. Ken explains how small shifts in the way spouses listen, respond, and support each other can change the tone of a marriage and help couples reconnect in practical ways.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
This week on Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, Cynthia and Dr. Ken kick off a three-part series on Christian marriage.
They start off with a little humor (including Cynthia’s list of things husbands should probably never say if they want to stay married), but the conversation quickly turns to a bigger question: why does marriage sometimes bring out the most intense reactions in otherwise reasonable people?
From a Christian perspective, marriage is more than two individuals trying to get along. Scripture describes it as a unique kind of unity—two people becoming “one flesh.” That closeness is part of what makes marriage so meaningful, but it’s also why the relationship can feel so intense at times.
Dr. Ken shares something he’s seen over decades of working with couples—many of the conflicts we think are about communication or personality are actually connected to deeper fears that husbands and wives carry but don’t always realize.
Today is the starting point for a three-week conversation on marriage—we hope you’ll join us!
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
In this episode, Dr. Ken and Cynthia dive into the topic of “affluenza” and the real pressure many parents feel to give their kids more—more opportunities, more experiences, and sometimes just… more stuff. They talk honestly about the tension between wanting to provide well and wondering if we’re accidentally creating unrealistic expectations or entitlement along the way.
From private school comparisons to lifestyle expectations and work ethic, the conversation explores how both wealth and worry about money can shape the way kids view gratitude, responsibility, and effort. Dr. Ken offers a thoughtful perspective on what actually builds resilience in kids—and why constantly shielding them from limits or discomfort is not helpful.
Listen in for a practical, realistic discussion on entitlement, motivation, and how to raise capable, grounded kids in a culture that constantly wants more.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
Today we take on apologizing to our kids—or what psychologists call “repair”—and why it feels so hard for many parents. Dr. Ken and Cynthia discuss how older generations rarely apologized because authority was the priority, while modern parenting emphasizes connection.
They unpack why some parents struggle to say “I’m sorry,” especially high-achieving or strong-willed parents, and Dr. Ken explains that healthy repair isn’t pretending your child did nothing wrong or giving half-apologies (“I’m sorry, but…”). Instead, it’s owning your reaction while still holding boundaries and consequences—modeling emotional regulation without acting like you and your teen are equals or roommates.
Listen in today for a practical word on why apologizing matters and how to do it effectively.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
Is it normal for teenagers—especially seniors—to barely be home, seem disengaged, or act irritated when family time is required? In this episode, Cynthia and Dr. Ken respond to a listener question that captures a common and often heartbreaking parenting experience: watching a teen pull away while knowing it’s part of growing up.
They discuss healthy separation and individuation, why this stage can feel especially painful for mothers, and how a teen’s distance doesn’t predict the quality of your future relationship. Dr. Ken explains the importance of strengthening the marriage during this transition, communicating honestly with teens about how their absence affects the family, and avoiding the slide from caring connection into control.
If you’re parenting an older teen and wondering whether this season is normal—or how to respond without guilt, fear, or overcontrol—this episode is for you.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
Is your teen being impulsive, oppositional, or something more concerning—and how can you tell the difference? In this episode, Dr. Ken breaks down three commonly misunderstood behavior patterns in adolescents: impulsivity, oppositional behavior, and conduct disorder.
He explains what impulsivity actually looks like in teens (and what it doesn’t), how oppositional behavior often shows up only around authority, and why conduct disorder is far less common—but important to recognize. You’ll learn how these behaviors differ, why the distinction matters, and how to balance empathy with accountability.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
This week on Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, we flip the script.
Instead of Cynthia asking the questions, Dr. Ken takes over—and interviews Cynthia on release day of her new book, How’d I Miss That? What follows is equal parts parenting wisdom, real-life chaos, and proof that even competent adults can forget to put the gas pump back.
Dr. Ken digs into why modern parents feel so much pressure to get everything right—and why most of what feels urgent probably isn’t. Cynthia shares the heart behind How’d I Miss That?: the small, everyday moments that quietly shape our kids, our faith, and our marriages far more than the big, flashy ones. They talk about comparison, friendship, parenting with the long view in mind, and why love—not perfection—is still the question we’re meant to answer.
It’s honest, funny, encouraging, and deeply relatable—especially if you’ve ever thought, Wait…How’d I Miss That?
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
In this episode, Cynthia and Dr. Ken respond to a listener question many parents are facing: how to handle nicotine use with adolescents. The situation raises important questions about legality, respect, boundaries, and how parental authority shifts as kids grow older.
Dr. Ken offers perspective on how nicotine use differs from alcohol and marijuana, why not all “bad choices” carry the same level of risk, and how parents can respond without overreacting or minimizing the issue. They discuss why consequences still matter, how those consequences should change as kids mature, and what it looks like to set clear household standards without turning the conversation into a power struggle.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/
This week’s episode was important enough to re-record: when (and if) you should push your teen to go to therapy. Cynthia and Dr. Ken unpack what therapy actually is, why forcing a resistant teen rarely works, and the surprising ways counseling can sometimes do more harm than good.
Dr. Ken explains how to recognize when therapy becomes necessary, why parent coaching often helps more than sending a reluctant teenager, and what to consider when choosing a counselor—including privacy boundaries, insurance realities, and whether your teen truly needs a Christian therapist.
They also address one of parents’ biggest fears: what to do when you’re worried about your child’s safety. With a practical, steady framework, Dr. Ken walks through how to assess real risk versus normal emotional overwhelm and how to respond without panic.
Today’s show is for anyone wondering whether counseling is the right next step.
If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners.
You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here
You can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here
You can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here
Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]
Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/