In this episode of Relaxed Male, your host Bryan Goodwin dives deep into the intricacies of personal responsibility and self-awareness in relationships. Bryan discusses how men often become their own worst enemies by repeating the same actions and expecting different results. He emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's thoughts and actions to improve personal circumstances and relationships.

Bryan shares his personal journey of overcoming frustration and blame, highlighting how men tend to point fingers at others, especially their partners, for their problems. He explains how this mindset invites unnecessary suffering and prevents men from living life on their own terms.

The episode explores the concept of "the model," which suggests that our thoughts create our emotions, and how understanding this can lead to better relationship dynamics. Bryan encourages listeners to examine what they make circumstances mean about themselves and to challenge the thoughts that lead to negative emotions.

Bryan also discusses the "97% rule," advising men to hold back from saying most of the impulsive things that come to mind, and instead focus on building connection and intimacy with their partners. He stresses the importance of understanding and communication in relationships, urging men to listen to their partners and create circumstances that foster love and intimacy.

Throughout the episode, Bryan offers insights into how men can stop punishing themselves and their partners by giving up their "manuals"—the set of expectations they have for others—and instead focus on what they can control: their own thoughts and actions. He invites listeners to explore coaching as a tool for personal growth and better relationships.


In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Brian Goodwin delves into the common pitfalls men face in relationships, particularly the tendency to blame others for personal problems. Brian shares insights on how men can take control of their relationship issues by understanding that the root of many problems lies within their own thoughts and actions. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and intentional living, urging listeners to examine the meaning they attach to circumstances and how these interpretations affect their emotions and relationships.

Brian discusses the "model" concept, which explains how circumstances trigger thoughts, leading to emotions and actions. He highlights the significance of recognizing and changing negative thought patterns to improve personal and relational well-being. Through personal anecdotes and relatable examples, Brian illustrates how misplaced blame and lack of communication can lead to unnecessary suffering and relationship breakdowns.

The episode also covers the "97% rule," encouraging men to refrain from saying most of the negative thoughts they might have, and the concept of "manuals," which are unspoken expectations we have for others. Brian advocates for letting go of these manuals to foster healthier relationships.

Listeners are invited to explore coaching as a means to gain clarity and improve their relationships, with Brian offering a free coaching session to help men step out of their comfort zones and embrace personal growth.

In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Bryan Goodwin delves into the common feeling of being stuck in life and how to overcome it. Bryan discusses the emotional and psychological aspects of feeling stuck, often referred to as mental spin or confusion, and explains how these feelings are rooted in fear and uncertainty. He shares personal experiences of feeling stuck in his own business endeavors and emphasizes the importance of understanding these emotions to move forward.

Bryan outlines the concept of indulgent emotions and how they keep us in our comfort zones, preventing growth and progress. He encourages listeners to confront their fears and take intentional actions to break free from the cycle of feeling stuck. By examining our thoughts and emotions, we can identify what holds us back and find motivation to push through the discomfort.

The episode also highlights practical steps to overcome the feeling of being stuck, such as conducting thought downloads, setting intentional goals, and finding alternative motivations. Bryan suggests finding accountability partners or seeking coaching to stay committed to personal growth. He emphasizes the importance of living life intentionally and embracing challenges to achieve fulfillment and success.

Join Bryan as he provides insights and strategies to help men live life on their terms, overcome obstacles, and build better relationships. Tune in next week as he explores the excuses we make for our struggles and how to address them.

Try Coaching - htttps://www.relaxedmale.com/trycoaching

Welcome to the first episode of 2025 on The Relaxed Male! As we step into the new year, it's crucial to reflect on the past year and learn from our experiences. In this episode, I, your host Brian Goodwin, delve into the importance of reviewing the past year to fuel your progress in the new one. We discuss how acknowledging your achievements and setbacks can empower you to move closer to your goals.

Reflecting on my own journey with Relaxed Male, I share the ups and downs of 2024, including the challenges and lessons learned. Despite facing obstacles, I remain committed to helping men break free from societal expectations and live life on their terms. This year, I aim to continue growing the Relaxed Male community and refine our message to attract more men seeking to improve their lives.

We explore the concept of the four pillars of a "raw ex man"—mind, body, soul, and community—and how strengthening these can lead to a fulfilling life. I also share my personal goals for 2025, including health improvements, expanding my coaching practice, and enhancing my marriage.

Join me as we discuss practical steps to achieve your goals, such as setting SMART goals, journaling, and creating vision boards. I encourage you to take action, whether it's by seeking coaching, joining a supportive community, or simply starting with small, consistent steps.

Let's make 2025 a year of growth and empowerment. If this episode resonates with you, please share it with others who might benefit from it. Together, we can help more men become the best versions of themselves.

In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of grace and how it can transform your life in the coming year. As the holiday season wraps up, many of us reflect on family gatherings and the challenges they bring. Host Bryan Goodwin encourages listeners to consider a different approach for 2025 by allowing grace to flow into their lives. Grace, defined as unearned forgiveness, is explored as a powerful tool for improving mental health and personal freedom.

Bryan discusses the importance of forgiving others, even those who have hurt us deeply, and how this act of grace can liberate us from the burdens of resentment and grudges. He emphasizes that true grace comes from a place of strength, not weakness, and challenges listeners to forgive not only others but also themselves for past mistakes and failures.

The episode encourages men to step out of their comfort zones, embrace forgiveness, and set goals for the new year. Bryan introduces the upcoming "Storm Masters Challenge," a program designed to help men harness their inner strength and navigate life's challenges with grace and resilience.

Join Bryan as he guides you through the process of letting go of past grievances, embracing grace, and preparing for a transformative year ahead. Whether it's forgiving a combative uncle or letting go of self-imposed grudges, this episode offers valuable insights into living a life free from the constraints of resentment.

As the holiday season approaches, it's the perfect time to reflect on the past year and prepare for the new one. In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the importance of reviewing our lives and setting goals for 2025. Host Bryan Goodwin, a certified coach, guides us through the process of self-examination and goal setting, emphasizing the significance of the four pillars of a relaxed male: mind, body, soul, and community.

Bryan shares his personal journey with Relaxed Male, discussing the challenges and successes he's faced over the past seven years. He highlights the importance of setting realistic goals and celebrating achievements, no matter how small. By conducting an after-action review, we can learn from our successes and failures, paving the way for personal growth.

The episode also explores the significance of having a strong community and the role it plays in personal development. Brian encourages listeners to focus on building relationships and expanding their network, as these connections can greatly influence our success and happiness.

Looking ahead to 2025, Brian shares his goals, including losing 50 pounds, attending a conference, and making new contacts. He emphasizes the importance of having a clear vision and the determination to achieve it, while also being prepared for challenges along the way.

Join Bryan as he offers insights and practical advice on how to make the upcoming year a successful and fulfilling one, by focusing on personal growth and building a supportive community.
https://www.relaxedmale.com/trycoaching

The podcast focuses on the concept of taking one's wife off a metaphorical pedestal in a relationship. The host, Bryan, discusses how men often idealize their wives, creating an unrealistic and ultimately harmful dynamic in their marriages.

Bryan explains that when men place their wives on a pedestal, they create an impossible standard of perfection. This idealization actually prevents genuine connection and love. By elevating their wives to an unreachable status, men inadvertently create distance and pressure that makes it difficult for their wives to be themselves.

The host, identifying as a recovering "nice guy," shares insights into how this pedestal mentality stems from feelings of unworthiness. Men often believe they don't deserve their wife's love, so they compensate by worshipping her. However, this approach backfires. It makes the wife uncomfortable and creates an unsustainable relationship dynamic where she feels constant pressure to maintain an impossible image.

Bryan emphasizes that wives are human beings with complex emotions and changing states. They go through various phases - sometimes feeling sexy and energetic, other times tired and overwhelmed, especially during different life stages like parenthood. When men expect their wives to maintain a constant, idealized state, they set themselves up for disappointment and resentment.

The key to a healthy relationship, according to Bryan, is accepting your wife's full humanity. This means allowing her to experience and express her emotions without trying to fix or judge them. It means being comfortable with her changing appearance, mood, and priorities. By removing her from the pedestal and treating her as an equal partner, men actually create space for deeper love and connection.

Bryan also addresses the challenge this presents for men, who are naturally inclined to solve problems and take action. He advises listeners to resist the urge to immediately fix their wife's emotions and instead simply be present and accepting.

Towards the end of the podcast, Bryan promotes an upcoming workshop called "Storm Master" aimed at helping men improve their relationships by understanding and managing their internal emotional landscape. He encourages listeners to share the podcast with others who might benefit from its insights about relationship dynamics and personal growth.

The overall message is profound in its simplicity: true love means accepting your partner completely, without conditions or unrealistic expectations, and allowing them the freedom to be fully human.

This week on The Relaxed Male, we have a special guest, Dawn Wiggins, host of the podcast Dear Divorce Diaries. We dive deep into the world of marriage counseling and explore what couples can expect from therapy. Dawn shares insights on how to navigate the painful journey of divorce and offers strategies to prevent it by fostering healthier relationships.

We discuss the concept of conflict avoidance, a common issue many men face, and how it impacts relationships. Dawn explains the importance of emotional processing and the dangers of becoming "comfortably numb" through distractions like work, screens, and substances. We explore how men can step into conflict constructively and create relationships worth fighting for.

Dawn shares her experiences with homeopathy and its impact on emotional well-being, offering a fresh perspective on alternative medicine. We also touch on the importance of grounding oneself in a belief system and how it can provide stability during conflicts.

Throughout the episode, we emphasize the significance of self-acceptance and understanding repetitive patterns in relationships. Dawn provides practical advice for men to improve their connections with their partners by observing and addressing deeper issues.

Join us for an enlightening conversation that challenges traditional views on masculinity and offers actionable steps for personal growth and relationship improvement.

Information on Our Guest
Dawn Wiggins Therapy
She specializes in EMDR, Tapping, Marriage therapy, and psychotherapy. With her offices based in Florida, she does in-person and online sessions.
Dawn also is a divorce coach helping women learn to process their thoughts and emotions so that they are able to grow from their experience.
Divorce Coaching - https://mycoachdawn.com/
Dawn's Therapy Website - https://www.dawnwigginstherapy.com/
Podcast: Dear Divorce Diary- https://mycoachdawn.com/divorce-podcast/

Dawns Social Media
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/MyCoachDawn
X - https://x.com/dawn_wiggins
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dawnwiggins/
Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@DawnWigginsLMFTBocaRaton
Threads - https://www.threads.net/@dawnwiggins

In this final episode of our series on intimacy, we delve into the realm of physical intimacy. Over the past ten weeks, we've explored various forms of intimacy, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, creative, conflict, aesthetic, and work. Today, we focus on the nuances of physical intimacy, a topic that often garners significant attention and curiosity.

Physical intimacy is more than just the act of sex; it encompasses a range of interactions, from holding hands to sharing a hug. These gestures release chemicals like oxytocin, fostering a sense of connection and bonding. We discuss how societal norms can sometimes hinder men from expressing their emotions, which are crucial for building emotional intimacy with their partners.

We also touch on the importance of conflict intimacy, which allows couples to engage in healthy disagreements and grow stronger together. This episode emphasizes that physical intimacy is deeply intertwined with other forms of intimacy, and improving these areas can enhance one's overall relationship.

For those seeking to deepen their understanding and practice of intimacy, I offer insights into how to work on emotional, intellectual, and spiritual connections. By focusing on these areas, physical intimacy will naturally follow, leading to a more fulfilling and balanced relationship.

Join me as we wrap up this enlightening series and prepare for next week's episode featuring a special guest, Don Wiggins.

What is Work initiative?


In this week's episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of work intimacy, a lesser-known but vital form of intimacy that influences our relationships both at home and in the workplace. Host Brian Goodwin explores how work intimacy fits into the broader spectrum of intimacy types, including emotional, intellectual, and experiential intimacy. He discusses the importance of effective communication and collaboration with our partners and colleagues, emphasizing how these interactions can strengthen our bonds and lead to personal growth.

Brian shares personal anecdotes about the challenges and rewards of working closely with a spouse, highlighting the need for presence and understanding in shared projects. He explains how work intimacy is not just about professional relationships but also about how we share our work experiences and problem-solving processes with our partners. This episode encourages listeners to embrace discomfort as a path to achieving deeper connections and a more fulfilling life.

Listeners are invited to reflect on their own work intimacy and consider how it impacts their overall relationship health. Brian also offers a preview of next week's episode, which will focus on physical intimacy, and extends an invitation to try a free coaching session to explore personal challenges further.

Links
Mini Coaching Session - https://www.relaxedmale.com/trycoaching
Podcast 2.0 app - https://www.relaxedmale.com/newapps

In this episode of The Relaxed Male, we delve into the concept of aesthetic intimacy, exploring how aesthetics and intimacy intertwine in our lives. As part of a series on different types of intimacy, We discuss the importance of sharing beautiful experiences with loved ones, particularly spouses, to strengthen relationships. Aesthetic intimacy is about appreciating the beauty around us, whether it's a sunset, a piece of art, or a simple walk with a partner, and how these shared moments can enhance our connections.

Bryan shares personal anecdotes, such as visiting Sunset Cliffs with his family and dog, to illustrate how aesthetic experiences can bond people together. He emphasizes the significance of being intentional in recognizing beauty in everyday life and how this can prevent relationships from becoming mundane.

The episode also touches on the broader spectrum of intimacy, including physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual, and how aesthetic intimacy fits into this framework. Bryan argues that aesthetic intimacy is a subset of experiential intimacy, highlighting the need for both beauty and ugliness to appreciate life fully.

Listeners are encouraged to engage in aesthetic experiences with their partners, to "stop and smell the roses," and to embrace both the beautiful and challenging aspects of life. Bryan also introduces a 4-week challenge starting January 1st, aimed at helping men calm their inner disturbances and improve their relationships.

In this week's episode, we delve into the concept of conflict intimacy, a crucial yet often overlooked aspect of relationships. Drawing inspiration from an article on Choose Therapy, we explore the ten different types of intimacy, focusing particularly on conflict intimacy and its significance in maintaining a healthy relationship.

Conflict intimacy, as discussed, is the ability to engage in and resolve conflicts constructively. It is essential for preventing relationships from becoming stagnant and for avoiding the "roommate syndrome." We revisit the various types of intimacy, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, experiential, social, and creative, and discuss how conflict intimacy intertwines with these aspects.

We explore why many people, especially men, avoid conflict due to fears of emotional upheaval and potential negative outcomes, such as impacting sexual relationships. However, embracing conflict can lead to deeper understanding and connection, as it involves sharing emotions, thoughts, and experiences.

Drawing insights from experts like Dr. John Gottman and Jason Gaddis, we highlight the importance of conflict in fostering a thriving relationship. We discuss how discomfort is a necessary currency for achieving desired outcomes and how conflict can lead to personal growth and stronger bonds.

Listeners are encouraged to embrace conflict as a means of enhancing intimacy and communication with their partners. By understanding and practicing effective conflict resolution, couples can transform their relationships, creating a more fulfilling and connected partnership.