Most advice about polyamory focuses on established couples, often overlooking the unique challenges faced by "incoming partners" aka those entering a relationship with someone who already has a long-established relationship. In this episode, Libby offers support and advice for those incoming partners so that they can feel empowered in a situation that can feel really tricky to navigate.

Episodes referenced in the episode

Veto Happens https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/When-is-it-Okay-to-Have-a-One-Pnis-Policy-e1ddpq3

Is Hierarchy Bad? https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/Is-Hierarchy-bad-e2hu61d

A Rule is just a Bad Agreement https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/A-Rule-is-just-a-Bad-Agreement-e1alt5u

One P*nis Policy https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/When-is-it-Okay-to-Have-a-One-Pnis-Policy-e1ddpq3

How to Date a Couple https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/Dating-as-a-Couple-e2b7u8a

This May be a Bitter Pill https://creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/makingpolywork/episodes/This-May-Be-a-Bitter-Pill-e1e1eoe

Current offerings from Libby

Join an Open Community Call

https://go.libbysinback.com/community-calls

What Actually Makes Polyamory Work - the Workshop

https://libbysinback.com/workshop

Libby invites Laura Boyle of Ready for Polyamory to join her on the show to talk about living together, chores, finances, coparenting, and more - all things having to do with cohabiting and polyamory.

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Show Links:

Laura's website: https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/

Laura's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/readyforpolyamory/

Monogamy? In this Economy? (The Book):

https://bookshop.org/a/91754/9781805011187

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to https://libbysinback.com/workbook to get your copy.

Libby talks about feeling grief and letting it move through you rather than being in a state of constant fixing as a way of avoiding it.

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My episode on holding space: https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/no-advice-please

What it Means to Hold Space for Someone by Heather Plett

11 Ways to Hold Space for Someone by Reaca Pearl

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to ⁠⁠https://libbysinback.com/workbook⁠⁠ to get your copy.

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Visit ⁠⁠https://makingpolyamorywork.com⁠⁠ to search back episodes

Libby's coaching website: ⁠⁠https://libbysinback.com

Libby invites Mia Schacter of Consent Wizardry to join her to answer two listener questions. The first one asks, what if I don't feel intense NRE with a new partner? Does that mean something or is it okay? The second asks, Is it okay for me to not want my partner to date monogamous people or is that something I need to learn to be okay with?

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Find Consent Wizardry

on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/consent.wizardry/

on Substack: https://consentwizardry.substack.com/

on the web: https://consentwizardry.com/

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to ⁠https://libbysinback.com/workbook⁠ to get your copy.

---------------

Visit ⁠https://makingpolyamorywork.com⁠ to search back episodes

Libby's coaching website: ⁠https://libbysinback.com

Libby invites her spouse, Drew to talk the established partner's side of the experience LIbby described in Gamechanger.

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to ⁠https://libbysinback.com/workbook⁠ to get your copy.

---------------

Visit ⁠https://makingpolyamorywork.com⁠ to search back episodes

Libby's coaching website: ⁠https://libbysinback.com

What happens when a new relationship completely upends everything you thought you knew about yourself? What if that person is a catalyst for more love, sexiness, and aliveness than you ever thought was possible? What does that mean for your existing relationship(s)? In this episode Libby shares her thoughts and a very personal part of her own journey.

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to https://libbysinback.com/workbook to get your copy.

---------------

Visit https://makingpolyamorywork.com to search back episodes

Libby's coaching website: https://libbysinback.com

Libby answers a common listener question: When starting a new relationship when you both know you want non-mongamy -- should you be open from the beginning, or should you be monogamous while you establish your partnership? Even if this isn't where you are right now in your polyamory journey, there's something for everyone here in Libby's thoughtful return to Making Polyamory Work.

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Also! Libby has created a workbook based on the most popular episodes of the podcast — with simple practices and reflection questions so that you can apply this stuff to your life.

Go to https://libbysinback.com/workbook to get your copy.

---------------

Visit https://makingpolyamorywork.com to search back episodes

Libby's coaching website: https://libbysinback.com

In Part 2 of Libby's conversation with Emily Nagoski, there's a deeper conversation about the concept of "maintenance s*x" and how you may be doing it to safe your relationship, but it may actually be destroying it.

Emily Nagoski's website: https://www.emilynagoski.com/ Emily Nagoski on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enagoski/

Emily Nagoski's books (highly recommended!): https://bookshop.org/contributors/emily-nagoski-4318b5e2-0f22-4415-963b-ce5a1f467607

The amazing Emily Nagoski joins Libby on Making Polyamory Work to drop truth bomb after truth bomb about sex in long-term relationships.

Emily Nagoski's website: https://www.emilynagoski.com/ Emily Nagoski on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enagoski/

Emily Nagoski's books (highly recommended!): https://bookshop.org/contributors/emily-nagoski-4318b5e2-0f22-4415-963b-ce5a1f467607

The Multiamory crew takes over Making Polyamory Work to talk about aggressive fairness in polyamory, what it looks like, and how you can find equity in your relationships.

Multiamory's website: https://www.multiamory.com/

Let's think about dating and rejection differently. Shine your light.