In this episode, you'll learn two powerful antidotes for porn addiction: play and awe. Ready for a deep dive into neuroscience? According to Polyvagal Theory, play and awe are both "blended states" that regulate your autonomic nervous system through connection instead of disconnection. Play is not peripheral. Awe is not optional. These experiences are essential for the health of your brain!

Watch the video at www.husbandmaterial.com/play-awe-porn

Related podcast episodes:

• Porn And Polyvagal Theory (with John Kilmer)
• Why Men Need To Play (with Dr. Michael Crocker)
• Master Your Nervous System (LIVE)

Recommended reading (these are paid links):

• Anchored by Deb Dana
• Polyvagal Theory in Therapy by Deb Dana
• The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Don't let unwanted same-sex attraction hold you back from a life of purpose and possibility. In this episode, Jason Mellard tells his story of feeling separate from masculinity and how that affected him sexually. Hear how Jason found lasting freedom from porn through finding his voice, grieving his wounds, and stepping into his purpose.

Jason Mellard is the founder of Own Your Identity, where he empowers men experiencing unwanted same-sex attraction to live the life they truly desire. Jason is a Certified High Performance Coach and Certified Husband Material Coach. He has experienced sexual abuse, same-sex attraction, and freedom from porn. Jason is committed to helping men live beyond their unwanted attractions and negative habits into a life of purpose and possibility through the power of Christ and for the glory of God.

Listen to Jason's podcast, Own Your Identity, where he provides practical tools to bring clarity and hope to men navigating unwanted same-sex attraction.

Jason is also the creator of SSAquiz.com. Take the quiz to discover how much same-sex attraction is impacting your life.

Learn more about Jason at ownyouridentitynow.com.

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Have you ever felt afraid to be vulnerable? Me too! In this episode, Trent Dollyhigh tells his story of childhood trauma, porn, pastoral ministry, prison, rehab, and a new life of redemptive risks. Here is a man who lost the world and gained his soul. May Trent inspire you to be vulnerable!

"There is no relationship without risk." —Trent Dollyhigh

Trent Dollyhigh is the founder of Be Vulnerable Mentoring, a recovery mentoring ministry. Trent is a Certified Professional Life Coach who holds a Bachelor's of Science in Education and a Master's of Divinity in leadership and counseling. He has experienced healing from trauma, divorce, and pornography. Trent's past immaturity, lack of courage, unhealthy sexuality, and fear as a lead pastor cost him almost everything. He has done the hard work of recovery from his own failures, and he has spent years living in freedom. Trent's passion is to guide others from their brokenness to redemption. He has experience with clinical residential treatment and years of recovery work specializing in sexual addiction and trauma. He works with men, women, and couples and is available for 1-on-1 mentoring, intensives, speaking engagements, group mentoring, and wilderness trips.  If you're looking for a trauma-informed mentor with personal experience with sexual addiction and recovery, contact Trent to begin the journey to hope and healing.

Learn more at TrentDollyhigh.com.

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What can Inside Out 2 teach us about outgrowing porn? I’ll share my top three takeaways. Spoiler alert: important plot details will be revealed. 

Related episodes about Internal Family Systems (IFS):

• Experience Healing Through IFS, with Dr. Peter Malinoski
• Unburdening Sexual Arousal, with Dr. Peter Malinoski
• Internal Family Systems and Jesus, with Kim Miller
• Move Toward, Not Against, with Jenna Riemersma
• The Image Of God In You, with Jenna Riemersma

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What are the 3 phases of healing from sexual betrayal? In part 2 of our series with Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket, you'll get a helpful overview of the Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model (MPTM). You'll also learn the difference between forgiveness vs. reconciliation vs. trust and how to avoid "good boy syndrome" while working on rebuilding trust.

Dr. Barbara Steffens is the founding president of APSATS, the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists. She has specialized in providing help for the partners of sexual addicts since 1999. Dr. Steffens is a recognized expert in the field, and is now accepting speaking engagements for churches and professional organizations. Learn more and connect with Barb at drbarbarasteffens.com

Buy Barb's book (this is a paid link):

Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal

Lyschel Burket is the Lead Hope Caster and Founder of Hope Redefined. She is also a current APSATS Board Member and the committee lead for BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Lyschel has been working with women since 2008 by helping them navigate the road of betrayal by sexual infidelity. She knows all too well the isolation, shame, fear, and trauma that betrayal causes. More than anything, Lyschel wants women to know that they don’t have to walk this road alone, so she provides a safe community where each one can find healing and hope.

Learn more about Lyschel and Hope Redefined at hoperedefined.org

More resources for women from Hope Redefined:

• private online community
• online support groups
• intensive retreats
• 1:1 coaching

Listen to the Hope For Wives podcast at hopeforwives.com!

Get trained by Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket through BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Learn more here.

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

What happens to the brain and body of a wife who discovers her husband's relationship with porn? This is part 1 of our 2 part series on the trauma of sexual betrayal taught by Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket. You'll learn why wives react the way they do, how to tell the difference between wives expressing anger vs. engaging in abusive behavior, how to set appropriate boundaries while practicing empathy, and what wives really want from their husbands in the healing process (VOWS). This teaching is absolutely brilliant. Take notes!

Dr. Barbara Steffens is the founding president of APSATS, the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists. She has specialized in providing help for the partners of sexual addicts since 1999. Dr. Steffens is a recognized expert in the field, and is now accepting speaking engagements for churches and professional organizations. Learn more and connect with Barb at drbarbarasteffens.com

Buy Barb's book (this is a paid link):
Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal

Lyschel Burket is the Lead Hope Caster and Founder of Hope Redefined. She is also a current APSATS Board Member and the committee lead for BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Lyschel has been working with women since 2008 by helping them navigate the road of betrayal by sexual infidelity. She knows all too well the isolation, shame, fear, and trauma that betrayal causes. More than anything, Lyschel wants women to know that they don’t have to walk this road alone, so she provides a safe community where each one can find healing and hope.

Learn more about Lyschel and Hope Redefined at hoperedefined.org

More resources for women from Hope Redefined:

• private online community
• online support groups
• intensive retreats
• 1:1 coaching

Listen to the Hope For Wives podcast at hopeforwives.com!

Get trained by Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket through BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Learn more here.

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Through the story of Philip and the Ethiopian eunuch, you'll hear how Jesus heals sexual shame, childhood trauma, systemic injustice, and the agonizing experience of being excluded and emasculated. If I could sum it up in two words: you belong!

This sermon was originally preached on Sunday, September 9, 2024 at the Husband Material Retreat in Colorado. Sign up to be notified about the 2025 retreat here.

Watch the video here.

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

We all experience sexual attraction differently (SSA, OSA, etc). In this episode, we explore the benefits, challenges, and limitations of forming deep friendships with men who experience different types of sexual attraction.

Drew Boa is the founder of Husband Material. Email Drew at husbandmaterial.com/drew

Henry Brown is the Director Of Operations & Support at HM. Email Henry at [email protected].

Jason Pidcock is a trauma-informed recovery coach and HM Community Member. Learn more at jasonpidcockcoaching.com.

Jordan Castille is a board-certified Christian counselor and Certified HM Coach. Learn more at castillecoaching.com.

Mentioned in this episode:

• How To Escape A Creepy Conversation Before Sexting
• Appropriate Nudity Between Men (LIVE)

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

How do you view men who experience same-sex attraction (SSA)? In this episode, Jordan Castille and Drew Boa deconstruct 10 stereotypes about men who are sexually attracted to men.

Jordan Castille is a Board Certified Christian Counselor, Certified Clinical Sex Addiction Specialist, APSATS CPC (Certified Partner Coach) - Candidate, and Certified Husband Material Coach. He and his wife Cherise have two boys. Jordan loves Jesus, people, video games, working out, Tex-Mex, learning how to fix things, legos, and his church community. Jordan also does one-on-one coaching and small group coaching within the Husband Material Community. He is trained with partner betrayal sensitivity through the APSATS organization.

https://www.castillecoaching.com
Book a Call
Email: [email protected] 

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

How do you view men who experience opposite-sex attraction (OSA)? In this episode, Jason Pidcock and Drew Boa deconstruct 10 stereotypes about men who are sexually attracted to women.

Jason Pidcock is a Certified Trauma Informed Recovery Coach and longtime member of the Husband Material community. Jason is passionate about helping men overcome the coping strategies they have developed that are no longer serving them well. After finding much healing from his own story of spiritual abuse and pornography addiction, he is transitioning from a career as a construction contractor to working full-time as a coach helping other men find their path to wholeness.

Reach out to Jason here…
Website: Www.jasonpidcockcoaching.com
Email: [email protected]

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

If you've spent years wishing your sexual thoughts and feelings would go away, this episode is for you. 

Related resources:

• Unwanted, by Jay Stringer (paid link)
• How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies
• How To Analyze Sexual Fantasies
• Why We Sexualize Emotions...And How To Desexualize Them

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!