Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife

Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is a sex and relationship expert who has been interviewed for hundreds of podcasts. You can access all the amazing content covering issues of faith, sexuality, integrity, belonging, and more right here on the interview archive! Dr. Finlayson-Fife is an LDS relationship and sexuality coach as well as a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in the state of Illinois. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also has a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology. The advice offered through any and all podcasts in which she is featured is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.

  • 28 minutes 40 seconds
    Baby, It's Cold INside: How Critique Chills Connection | Room for Two Teaser

    Room for Two is on sale for Christmas! Use code JOLLY to SAVE $18 on your first year subscribing!

    In this preview episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife works with Brad and Kate, a couple who feels a chill in their relationship that they can't seem to shake. Sound familiar? Subscribe today to unlock this FULL episode (plus the entire Brad and Kate series and hundreds of other episodes that are just as relevant and helpful!).

    20 December 2025, 7:00 am
  • 52 minutes 22 seconds
    Desire, Difference, and the Path to Intimacy - Part 1

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    Falling in love is a gift. Staying in love requires something more—the willingness to grow into someone who can hold both connection and individuality without losing either.

    In this conversation with Taylor Church of the Of Stone and Clay Podcast, Dr. Jennifer draws from her new book and research on sexuality to explore how we move from the magic of falling in love to the deeper work of creating lasting intimacy. She offers wisdom on navigating difference, sustaining desire, and why the challenges of marriage are not necessarily failures but invitations to grow.

    Listen to the full episode to learn more about:

    17 December 2025, 7:00 am
  • 44 minutes 4 seconds
    Amor Incondicional y Sexo en Etapa 3 [Wholehearted Loving and Stage 3 Sex]

    We've received many requests over the years to offer Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Miriam Parkin has generously offered her time and talent to translate episodes for us and we will add them to the feed as they come in (in addition to our regular podcast production schedule).

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    En este episodio del podcast, la Dra. Finlayson-Fife conversa con Dan Purcell del podcast Get Your Marriage On.

    Hablan sobre...

    - Las 3 etapas del desarrollo sexual y cómo llevar su matrimonio al siguiente nivel

    - La importancia de cultivar la energía erótica en la relación

    - Cómo pasar de tener relaciones sexuales a una conexión profunda a través del acto de hacer el amor

    13 December 2025, 7:00 am
  • 38 minutes 29 seconds
    Let's Talk Libido

    The word libido can make it seem like desire is predetermined and out of our control—we either have it or we don't. In reality, desire is remarkably fluid—shaped by the meanings we attach to sex, our sense of self, and the kind of relationship we’re stepping into. 

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why podcast to discuss libido and sexual desire. They explore how biology, medications, aging, stress, and hormones can influence our sexual desire—but emphasize that the meanings we carry about sex, marriage, duty, and self-worth are usually the most powerful drivers of all.

    Dr. Finlayson-Fife also responds to three common scenarios:

    • a husband who uses data and calendars to justify his sexual entitlement

    • a man who responds to sexual differences with persistent whining

    • a mother overwhelmed by young children who feels too “touched out” for sex

    In each example, she offers insight into how shifting the underlying meaning—not just the behavior—can help couples create a more grounded and mutually satisfying sexual dynamic.

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    9 December 2025, 7:00 am
  • 55 minutes 24 seconds
    Extended-Family Relationships | Q&A with Dr. Jennifer

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    With the holidays ahead, many of us are getting ready for extended-family gatherings—and the fun, stress, and complexity that can come with them. Our extended-family relationships can be particularly challenging because they push directly on our differentiation. As Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches, few things—aside from marriage—expose our difficulty with differentiation quite like spending time with the families we grew up in.

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife answers audience questions about common extended-family challenges, including enmeshed parent–child relationships, triangulation, intrusive or overstepping in-laws, sibling competitiveness, and families that resist change. She talks about how couples can stay steady in these situations by being clear about how they want to function, holding to their integrity, and choosing honest, grounded ways of relating—regardless of the pressures around them.

    25 November 2025, 7:00 am
  • 44 minutes 50 seconds
    Understanding Sexual Shame

    Many of us carry sexual shame that began long before adulthood. The tone of our childhood homes, the way our parents handled emotion and mistakes, and the silence or anxiety surrounding the body all shaped how acceptable our desires—and our imperfections—felt to us. Those early messages often linger, coloring how we see ourselves and even how we imagine God sees us.

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Chris Rich of The Mixed-Faith Relationship Podcast to unpack where sexual shame comes from and how it shows up in adulthood. She explains how shame turns toxic when it convinces us that our flaws make us unworthy, and she offers a clearer, kinder way forward—one that helps us accept our embodied nature, integrate our sexuality, and relate to ourselves with more honesty and compassion.

    Listen to the full episode to learn more about:

    • What sexual shame actually is—and how it develops

    • How childhood experiences shape comfort with desire

    • Why many of us confuse anxiety with “God’s judgment”

    • The difference between healthy inhibition and toxic shame

    • How both repression and indulgence keep us stuck

    • What genuine sexual integration looks like

    • How to foster healthier, shame-free conversations with our children


    JOIN OUR MAILING LIST HERE and you'll get the link to join us for an online screening of "The Mormon Sex Therapist" on Thursday! 

    18 November 2025, 7:00 am
  • 29 minutes 52 seconds
    Afrontar el Conflicto [Coping With Conflict]

    We've received many requests over the years to offer some of Dr. Finlayson-Fife's resources in other languages. Today we are thrilled to be offering our first episode in Spanish (a translation of THIS popular episode from the archive). We are incredibly grateful to Miriam Parkin for offering her time and talent to translate this episode and look forward to offering more resources in Spanish in the future!
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    El conflicto surge naturalmente cuando dos personas intentan construir una vida juntas y representa una valiosa oportunidad de crecimiento si lo permitimos.

    Cuando no estamos de acuerdo con nuestra pareja, solemos recurrir a comportamientos que causan dolor y frustración, en lugar de esforzarnos por encontrar respuestas más productivas y colaborativas, aunque a menudo parezcan contraintuitivas.

    En este episodio, la Dra. Finlayson-Fife se une a la coach de relaciones Anne Nelson para hablar sobre cómo las relaciones pueden crecer y prosperar, incluso ante el conflicto y las diferencias.

    11 November 2025, 7:00 am
  • 57 minutes 36 seconds
    When is it Time to Leave? | Q&A with Dr. Jennifer

    When a marriage feels painful or uncertain, it’s easy to tell ourselves we just need more time to figure out the "right" thing to do. But there’s a difference between taking time to make a wise choice and staying stuck because we’re afraid to face the difficult reality of what we know is true. Real hope invites growth and honesty. False hope keeps us waiting for something to change when there’s strong evidence it never will.

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife answers questions from listeners wrestling with whether to stay or leave their marriages. She explores why peace doesn’t come from certainty, but from the courage to act with integrity—choosing what we believe is most right, even when both paths carry loss.

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    Join us for a date night with Dr. Jennifer on November 8th in St. George!

    4 November 2025, 7:00 am
  • 49 minutes 6 seconds
    Intimacy in Midlife

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Jane Copier of the Happy in the Middle podcast to speak directly to women in midlife who feel disconnected from desire or unsure of how to bring themselves back into their marriages. She explains why this stage—though often uncomfortable—is full of possibility: a chance to stop living on autopilot, get honest about what you want in your life, and create more peace and connection in your relationship.

    If this episode hits home, you'd love The Art of Desire course for women: https://www.finlayson-fife.com/courses/course/the-art-of-desire

    Get the Book: https://amzn.to/48HnuUC

    21 October 2025, 6:00 am
  • 55 minutes 47 seconds
    We Need to Talk About Pornography

    When pornography shows up in our lives or relationships, our instinct is often to meet it with fear, shame, silence, or attempts to control. But these responses don’t bring peace—they keep us anxious, afraid, and disconnected from ourselves and each other.

    In this episode, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Lauren Yarrow of The Blonde Apologist to offer a powerful reframe for those struggling to understand or navigate pornography—whether in their own lives, in marriage, while dating, or as parents. Drawing on insights from That We Might Have Joy, Dr. Finlayson-Fife explains how growth doesn’t come through control or avoidance, but through honesty, self-understanding, and integrity.

    JOIN US FOR THE ART OF LOVING RETREAT

    14 October 2025, 6:00 am
  • 43 minutes 49 seconds
    Intimacy Beyond Validation

    Relationships feel easy when things are going well—when we feel understood and everything between us feels steady. They’re much harder when we’re frustrated, disappointed, or misunderstood. Yet it’s in those moments of friction and honest conflict that we’re invited to grow—to become wiser, more grounded, and more capable of real love.

    In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Tanner to share insights from That We Might Have Joy and explore how conflict in marriage isn’t a sign that something’s gone wrong, but part of the very process through which deeper intimacy and peace take shape.

    **Join us for Date Night With Dr. Jennifer! **

    9 October 2025, 6:00 am
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