We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.
It’s time for Announcement Number Three! A brand-new Imperfects Live Show (!!!!!!).
That’s right, we’re going on the road again. In October, November, and December of this year (2025), we’ll be performing a brand-new stage show, around the country!
It’s gonna be bigger, it’s gonna be better, and we promise we won’t let Hugh (or Chat GPT) write the show. All responsibility will henceforth be given to Random Word Generator!
We would love and adore to see you there!
🎟️ Click here to get your tickets – https://bit.ly/3EHPYkj
If you would like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://bit.ly/3CYoOF8
If you would like to subscribe to A Little More Imperfects, click here – www.patreon.com/theimperfects
🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned
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Psychologist Maria Ruberto is back to talk about one of the most important parts of our day: sleep.
Starting off with the biology of sleep, Maria takes us through how we get to sleep, what happens when we sleep, and why we desperately need to sleep for good health and longevity. With metaphors galore to make the science as relatable as possible, we discuss the role of melatonin, the impact of screens on our suprachiasmatic nucleus and whether it’s worth cutting your sleep short to exercise?
In more practical terms, Maria shares what sleep hygiene actually looks like, and, to Hugh and Josh’s relief, how hormones released during parenthood act to buffer against sleep deprivation.
So set your sleep alarms, get comfy, and tuck yourself in for a BIG episode!
Sweet dreams x
If you would like to watch this full video on YouTub, follow this link: https://bit.ly/4htdJLj
If you’d like to subscribe to our Patreon, A Little More Imperfects, sign up here: Patreon.com/theimperfects
🫖 Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned in this episode:
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*please note, some of these require a referral from a GP or specialist
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
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The stoke level is pretty high this week because we are joined by three-time world champion surfer, shark attack survivor, and maybe the nicest guy we have ever met, Mick Fanning.
We had high expectations for this chat (we mean, it’s Mick Fanning), but he absolutely blew us out of the water with his humanity, compassion, empathy, and positivity in the face of incredible tragedy.
Mick, we’ll definitely take you up on that offer of a surf (and lifelong friendship).
To watch this full video on our YouTube, click here - https://bit.ly/3Er6W6g
To subscribe to A Little More Imperfects on Patreon, follow this link: Patreon.com/imperfects
To subscribe to our newsletter, The Vulnerabilitea-Mail (which includes a reflective journalling question based on this episode), follow this link: https://bit.ly/42bYguo
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Well, well, well. We’re (officially) back for 2025, baby!
On Hugh’s agenda for today’s episode: nugatory chat, ghosts, general excitement for the new season and we also reveal THE SECOND BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!
That’s right, The Imperfects are bringing you a new show.
A Little More Imperfects, which can be found on Patreon, is bonus fortnightly episodes featuring everything that you know and love (Josh going deep, Ryan being hilarious and Hugh giving life changing advice / intense second hand embarrassment) PLUS early access to live show tickets and events and great discounts on our merch.
So enjoy this sneak preview, and we can’t wait for the season ahead.
If you would like to subscribe to our Patreon, follow this link - https://www.patreon.com/theimperfects
If you would like to watch this full episode on YouTube (and catch a glimpse of organised Hugh for the only time this millennia), click here - https://bit.ly/4hC4XKI
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It’s our last episode of Summer School, and today we welcome back clinical psychologist (and “clinical cousin” of Hugh and Josh), James van Cuylenburg.
In this episode, James tells us EVERYTHING we need to know about our relationships… well almost everything…there’s a lot to cover.
From attachment styles, to breaking trust, to learning how to own your feelings and navigating coupledom through life’s changing seasons.
Getting into the nitty gritty, Hugh asks James about intimacy and what happens when you’re not…. having any. And how to start a conversation with your kids about pornography.
Relationships make life worth living and whether they’re with an intimate partner, a friend, or yourself, they should be cherished and treated with care.
James, we thank you for your guidance.
If you liked this episode, and wanted to do some further reflection on it, each week our Vulnerabilitea-mail newsletter shares a question to get you thinking deeper. We’d love to hear from you, so please send your reflections in to the link provided. Subscribe here!
If you would like to watch this full episode on YouTube, click here - https://bit.ly/3WwDguJ
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🚨If you, or someone you know, has experienced or is at risk of domestic violence or coercive control, call the 24 hour national counselling service 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732). In an emergency, or if you’re feeling unsafe, call 000.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
In this episode of our Summer School, we are joined by Sophie Walker, creator, and host of Australian Birth Stories.
With over 17 million downloads, and 500 episodes, Australian Birth Stories podcast has been accredited by the Australian College of Midwives and has been instrumental in educating and empowering both people who are giving birth, as well as birthing partners.
Hugh shares the incredible trauma and fear involved with his first experience of birth, and how tools of education and empowerment, such as Lael Stone’s excellent counselling, helped him prepared for birth a second time around.
The power of information is invaluable, and Josh opens up about how Hugh’s experience with birth shaped his own, and what the experience was like for him.
Sophie, it was such a pleasure.
To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://youtu.be/3sey26-L4Rw
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If you, or someone you know, is struggling with post-natal depression or anxiety surrounding birth, these are a few great websites we’ve found
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B b b bonus episode!
We proudly present to you My Imperfect Life: a novel journal written by you. That’s right, we’re releasing a book, but making you do all the work.
With 100 questions inspired by episodes from 2024 on The Imperfects, My Imperfect Life is an introduction to vulnerability, allowing you to unpack your own imperfect life and be more vulnerable with yourself (because we know vulnerability with others can be A LOT).
To celebrate the launch of My Imperfect Life, we are inviting you to a reverse book singing at Readings Emporium Melbourne on Friday January 31st at 5:30pm, where we want to meet you, the author (and perhaps get a photo with you too, and maybe an autograph if you’re not too busy).
🎟️ To buy a ticket to the Reverse Book Signing (which includes a copy of My Imperfect Life that you will pick up on the day), follow this link – https://bit.ly/4hh0tcl
📖 To just purchase My Imperfect Life, click here – https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/
📃 To become our penpal, join The VulnerabiliTea-mail, a weekly newsletter where we’ll send you one vulnerable question inspired by the current episode, to help you unpack your own imperfect life. Subscribe at theimperfects.com.au
🎧 Things to listen to
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There will come a time for all of us (unless we REALLY make some improvements with bio-hacking) where we are faced with our own mortality.
Who is at your hypothetical bedside? Are you happy with how you’ve lived? Do you have any regrets?
In this Summer School edition of the Academy of Imperfection, we are joined by Bronnie Ware.
Bronnie found herself in palliative care, caring for, and listening to, the dying. And boy, are we glad she did.
Bronnie collated, and published, the Top 5 Regrets of the Dying (listed below for your convenience), and this episode is devoted to talking through what each of these might mean for Hugh, Ryan and Josh.
Perfectly timed for the New Year, we hope you get as much out of this episode as we did.
Bronnie, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with us.
To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://www.theimperfects.com.au/episode/bronnie-ware-wha…r-future-regrets/
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Quick heads up: Little Boy Christmas has a tenuous relationship with his parents, and therefore, this episode isn’t suited for kids.
Have you ever wondered about Little Boy Christmas, the forgotten son of Santa and Mrs Claus?
Nope, neither had we.
That’s probably why he’s forgotten.
Looking like an unbelievably shredded Dickensian orphan (you’re going to want to watch the YouTube for this one), Little Boy Christmas chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the physical and psychological pressures of being in the most famous family in the world.
A BIG thank you to Guy Montgomery who introduced us to Little Boy Christmas.
All ad revenue from this episode will be donated to Guy Montgomery’s chosen charity of Auckland City Mission. Auckland City Mission responds to poverty, aiming to help people find permanent housing and food. If you’d like to donate, or check out what they’re about, follow this link - https://bit.ly/3VB0dfM
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You may know Michael from Love on the Spectrum, or his podcast Mr A+, or even his appearance on Ellen – he’s done it all and has gained an incredible amount of wisdom on his journey so far.
We’ve been doing this show for six years, and no-one has ever summarised it as well as Michael Theo: trying to be perfect is a wild goose chase.
In this episode, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to Michael about how he found his voice after growing up as a non-verbal kid, and instils on the guys some advice on how to handle nerves (and do some proper improv).
Michael, we had an absolute blast. We’ll see you for a Yowie sometime soon.
If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://youtu.be/eVtYKdJUpVU
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Today we welcome into the studio 7 time world champion surfer, and all-round legend, Layne Beachley.
Layne, who had the self-described ‘compassion of a tiger shark’ during her competition days, has lived an incredible journey to learn how to love others, and more importantly, herself.
Upon discovering that she was adopted, Layne internalised a fear of rejection and intense need to prove herself.
What’s one way to prove yourself, you may ask? Becoming a world champion, no matter the cost.
In this episode, Hugh, Ryan and Josh talk to Layne about the narrative that she created for herself, and how this affected her self-worth, body image and relationships.
There is SO MUCH good stuff in this episode, and we can’t wait for you to enjoy your day at the Beach(ley).
Layne, you are an absolute legend. Thank you for your generous vulnerability.
If you would like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://bit.ly/3VsnIrd
ALSO if you would like to buy tickets to Josh’s gig (!!!!!) click here - https://bit.ly/3ZO6ojf
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