Brett Howard and Todd Azevedo are no longer welcome at the Ancient Ozarks Natural History Museum. They're also banned from any and all Bass Pro Shops in America. Johnny Morris owns both, and the boys are responsible for destroying around $200,000 of Johnny's property my messing with a mammoth fossil. 

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A Sheriff's deputy in Port Orchard, Washington pulled over a 34-year-old man at 12:30 in the morning. 
That man took off and got away, briefly. Authorities caught up with him an hour and a half later after he had crashed his electric unicycle in a ditch. He got a DUI for drunk unicycling. Impressive.

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All 33-year-old Patrick Alexander had to do was pay his $250 bond and the Chesterfield County judge would let him go. Patrick tried to pay with 3 counterfeit $100 bills, even telling the judge to "keep the change."  

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When 31-year-old Nadine Kaufman was pulled over in Boca Raton, FL, police asked for her license and registration. Instead she handed them a bag of Q-Tips and batteries. It didn't get any better after that.

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Stealing baseball cards from Walmart doesn't seem like a huge sin. Stealing over $1000 in cards over 5 days is harder to explain, especially when you're the Very Reverend Aidan Smith, Head Priest and Dean of of Trinity Episcopal Cathedral in Pittsburgh.  

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A man on a motorcycle was being chased by police when he decided to ditch it ... and his shoes ... and his backpack ... and his jacket ... and his pants. Police dogs had no problem tracking his scent right to his hiding spot.

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Teara Smith was found, uninvited, in the kitchen of a family's home in Springfield, Missouri. She'd made a mess before enjoying a bowl of Fruity Pebbles and getting to know the family dog. After admitting to some marijuana use and saying she "mistook the house for a fair," Teara was arrested.

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33-year-old Mitchell Fairbarn of Ontario, Canada made some memories, and headlines, last week in Vegas. He took a Flamingo out of it's habitat at The Flamingo Hotel because he thought it needed help. Sounds more like Mitchell needed to sober up.

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24-year-old Spencer Anderson was arrested after destroying at least 3 license plate readers in Waterford, Michigan. Cops knew it was him since the readers caught images of their own destruction and the man who did it.

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While his Mom waited back at the test center, a 26-year-old man in St Helens, England was pulled over while taking his driver's test. At first it was just for a busted taillight, but when cops caught a whiff of marijuana, the test was over. 

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South Korean tax authorities learned the hard way, and at a cost of $5.6 million U.S., that before you brag online about your recent crypto bust make sure the photos you're posting don't include the wallet recovery phrases. Someone might take advantage of that.

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