• 59 minutes 19 seconds
    Can AI Become Conscious? What Does That Mean About Your Soul? - with Bruce D. Randall | EP 511

    Can AI become conscious? And what does that question reveal about you?

    In this episode of Grief 2 Growth, I sit down with Bruce Randall, a Reiki master and author who spent 25 years leading cloud and AI transformation at companies like Oracle and AT&T. Bruce has lived in both worlds, the boardroom and the meditation cushion, and he brings both to a conversation about what happens where artificial intelligence, quantum computing, and the human soul meet.

    You’ll hear why grief belongs in a conversation about technology, how Bruce’s own losses in 2020 changed him, and why he believes the more you expand your consciousness, the more you stay human as the world speeds up. If you’ve ever felt a flicker of unease about where all of this is headed, this conversation will meet you right there.

    🎧 What You’ll Hear

    • ✨ How Bruce defines consciousness, and why he believes you can develop yours
    • ✨ What AI really is, how it works through probabilities, and why it can sound like it understands you when it doesn’t
    • ✨ The Chinese room thought experiment and why AI hallucinations matter
    • ✨ How Neuralink is bringing humans and technology together, and the questions it raises
    • ✨ Why intuition, the soul, and life beyond biology set you apart from any machine
    • ✨ Free will, life guardrails, and the idea that we choose our lessons before we arrive
    • ✨ Who is in charge of AI ethics, and the paperclip problem
    • ✨ Consciousness as a field, and why unexplainable healing keeps challenging old paradigms
    • ✨ How to prepare for the AI future, including the jobs and skills that will matter

    πŸ‘€ About Bruce Randall

    Bruce Randall is an author, Reiki master, and technology leader who spent 25 years guiding cloud and AI transformation at companies including Oracle and AT&T. After a season of profound loss, he deepened his meditation and inner work, studied data science at MIT, and began writing about how we bridge AI and human consciousness. His books include The AI Human Paradox, The Quantum Human Paradox, The QAI Human Paradox, and The End of Smart.

    πŸ”— Connect with Bruce

    Website and white papers on consciousness, AI, and quantum (under the Insights tab): brucedrandall.ai

    Books: Find them on Amazon under Bruce D. Randall

    πŸ’¬ Join the Conversation

    I’d love to hear from you.

    • What resonated with you most in this conversation?
    • Have you ever known something you couldn’t explain, a feeling or an intuition that turned out to be right?
    • Where do you see the line between enhancing yourself with technology and losing yourself?

    Head to grief2growth.substack.com to read the companion article, leave a comment, and connect with me and other listeners.

    πŸ’œ If this episode meant something to you, share it with someone who has been wondering about the same questions. Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth so you never miss a conversation.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    27 October 2026, 5:00 pm
  • 1 hour 5 minutes
    Overcoming Fear of Death: What a Sphere of Light Taught Kara Goodwin | EP 511


    What if your fear of death isn't something to hide or manage, but something pointing you toward a bigger truth? 🌱

    After the loss of her sister-in-law Michelle, followed by a wave of heartbreak that kept arriving, Kara Goodwin turned to meditation just to get through each day. What she found changed how she sees life, death, and the light within her.

    In this conversation, Kara shares how grief cracked her open, how a lifelong fear of death became the hidden engine behind her spiritual curiosity, and the experiences that sound remarkably like near-death experiences, even though she never left her body behind. If you've ever had a moment of light or knowing that didn't fit in the "inbox," you'll feel right at home.

    In this episode, you'll hear:

    ✨ How a season of loss led Kara to meditation, and how meditation led her back to God
    ✨ Why a healer in Assisi told her she wasn't praying, and what changed after that
    ✨ What Kara experienced in the hypnagogic state, the space between awake and asleep
    ✨ How a planet-sized sphere of light and a tiny pinpoint of light showed her how we create our reality
    ✨ Why sharing sacred, unexplainable experiences gives other people permission to share theirs

    About Kara Goodwin

    Kara Goodwin is the host of the Soul Elevation Podcast, a certified meditation teacher, a Reiki master, and the author of Your Authentic Awakening: A Guide to Everyday Spiritual Living. She has spent years learning to sit with fear instead of running from it, and she writes and speaks about the everyday practice of spiritual living.

    Connect with Kara

    🌐 Website: https://www.karagoodwin.com/
    ▢️ Soul Elevation Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@soulelevationpodcast

    Join the conversation

    What resonated with you in Kara's story? Have you had an experience of light or knowing that you couldn't quite explain? Has your own fear of death ever turned out to be a doorway?

    Read the companion article and share your thoughts with me and other listeners at grief2growth.substack.com

    If this episode touched you, please share it with someone who might need to hear it today. πŸ’œ

    If you are struggling after a loss, you don't have to carry it alone. In the U.S., you can call or text 988 at any time.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    20 October 2026, 10:00 am
  • 1 hour 2 minutes
    What To Say Instead of β€œI’m Sorry for Your Loss” | Emilio Parga | EP 510

    You’ve been there. Someone you care about has just lost a person they love, and you freeze. You want to say the right thing, so you say β€œI’m sorry for your loss,” or you say nothing at all.

    In this episode, pediatric thanatologist Emilio Parga gives you something better. After 24 years of guiding children, teens, families, schools, workplaces, and athletic teams through loss, he shares simple, practical words you can use today. You’ll hear why talking about death is a skill you can learn, why a one-minute text can mean more than you think, and why you never have to be afraid of saying a person’s name.

    We also talk about the children who are too often overlooked, the siblings Emilio calls β€œthe forgotten mourners,” and what it really means to move forward with your grief instead of moving on from it.

    About Emilio Parga

    Emilio Parga is a pediatric thanatologist and the leader of The Solace Tree, a nonprofit that has supported children, teens, and adults from ages 3 to 93 for 24 years. A former teacher, special needs educator, adaptive PE teacher, coach, and school counselor, Emilio has made it his life’s work to teach the adults around grieving kids, including parents, teachers, coaches, and entire companies, how to stop going silent and start showing up. The Solace Tree offers weekly family support, a grief camp for kids at Lake Tahoe, and national Zoom groups, including groups focused on suicide loss and groups for men.

    πŸ”— The Solace Tree: https://www.solacetree.org

    In this episode, you’ll hear:

    ✨ What to say instead of β€œI’m sorry for your loss,” and why asking β€œWhat was their name?” opens the door
     ✨ Why siblings are the β€œforgotten mourners” and how to help them feel seen
     ✨ Why kids and teens often hide their grief, and why peer support matters
     ✨ How to keep showing up long after the first year, with a one-minute text or a reminder in your phone
     ✨ How seasons, anniversaries, and favorite times of year can bring grief rushing back
     ✨ How to offer specific help instead of β€œlet me know if you need anything”
     ✨ Why Emilio and Brian prefer β€œmoving forward” and β€œmoving together” to β€œmoving on”
     ✨ What the Girl Scouts taught Emilio about disenfranchised grief, from great-grandmothers to a beloved pet goat

    Memorable moments

    πŸ’¬ β€œWhat’s mentionable is manageable,” the idea Emilio carries from Mr. Rogers into his work
    Β πŸ’¬ Why most people light up when you ask about their loved one
    Β πŸ’¬ The one question Emilio suggests when you get awkward: β€œWhat’s one funny thing about them?”

    Now it’s your turn

    πŸ’œ What resonated with you most in this conversation?
    Β πŸ’œ Who in your life could use a one-minute β€œI’ve been thinking about you” this week?
    Β πŸ’œ What is one thing you wish someone had said to you after your loss?

    Share your thoughts in the comments on the companion article at grief2growth.substack.com. I read every one, and your story may be exactly what another listener needs to hear.

    Connect with Brian

    πŸ”— All my links: https://pages.grief2growth.com/profile
    πŸ“° Email list: https://pages.grief2growth.com/join-the-club
    ⏰ Free consult: https://grief2growth.as.me/30-minute-consult

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    13 October 2026, 10:00 am
  • 59 minutes 54 seconds
    Autism and Grief: Why Closure Is a Myth with Christopher Carazas | EP 509

    What if nothing is wrong with you because your grief hasn't "resolved"? 🌱

    Autism and grief is a conversation that rarely gets space, and in this episode Christopher Carazas gives it room. Chris was diagnosed as autistic in 2020, after he had already built the life he thought he was supposed to want. Soon after, he lost his marriage, his home, and his sense of who he was. Later, he lost Katie, the woman who helped him begin to heal.

    Chris doesn't tie his story up with a bow, and neither do we. You'll hear what grief looks like when you process the world differently, why the "triumph over tragedy" story can leave you feeling like you're failing, and how to carry grief without pretending it will ever be neat.

    If you've been told you should be further along by now, this conversation is for you. If you love someone who is neurodivergent and grieving, you'll leave knowing how to show up for them. πŸ’›

    In this episode, you'll hear:

    ✨ Why closure is a myth, and what grief looks like when it becomes part of you
     ✨ How autism and grief can collide, from rumination to struggling to cry
     ✨ Why Chris pushes back on the "survival as redemption arc" story
     ✨ How to grieve the future you imagined, and shift from "why me?" to "why for me?"
     ✨ The backpack of stones, and why the weight changes even when it never leaves
     ✨ Katie's hidden notes, and how Chris uses them when old voices get loud
     ✨ What Chris's lighthouse is, and how it guides his days
     ✨ Simple, powerful ways to support a neurodivergent friend or family member in grief

    About Christopher Carazas

    Christopher Carazas is a social impact strategist and the author of Now That I'm Still Here: A Memoir of Ruin and Resurrection. Through his Substack newsletter of the same name, he writes about survival, storytelling, mental health, humor, and hope after ruin. His work lives at the intersection of grief, neurodivergence, and the long, unglamorous aftermath of psychological trauma.

    Connect with Chris

    πŸ“š Website and book: https://www.chriscarazas.com
    Β πŸ“° Substack: https://ccarazas.substack.com
    Β πŸ“˜ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/christopher.carazas.2025
    Β πŸ“Έ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christophercarazas

    What resonated with you?

    πŸ’­ Have you ever wondered why you weren't crying, and whether that meant you didn't love them enough?
    Β πŸ’­ What would it change if you stopped waiting for closure and started building a life around your grief?
    Β πŸ’­ What is your lighthouse right now?

    Share your thoughts in the comments on the companion article and join the conversation with me and other listeners: https://grief2growth.substack.com

    πŸ’œ If this episode touched you, share it with one person who needs to hear they're not behind.

    πŸ”” Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth so you never miss an episode.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    7 October 2026, 7:00 pm
  • 1 hour 4 minutes
    You Only Grieve Because You Loved | Carl Manlan on Loss, Healing & Fatherhood | EP 508

    What if grief isn’t only something we surviveβ€”but something that reveals how deeply we’ve loved?

    In this episode of Grief 2 Growth, I sit down with Carl Manlan, author of I Can Breathe, for a powerful conversation about grief, fatherhood, emotional healing, identity, and legacy.

    Carl lost his father as a young man. Years later, becoming a father himself brought some of that grief back to the surface and raised a profound question: How do you become the father you want to be when you can no longer have those conversations with your own father?

    We also explore something many men struggle to discuss: expressing emotions and asking for help. As two Black men raised in different parts of the world, Carl and I discovered surprising similarities in how we experienced love growing upβ€”and how we're trying to do things differently with the next generation.

    Carl also shares how unexpectedly losing his job became a turning point that helped him finish I Can Breathe.

    One insight captures the heart of our conversation:

    β€œYou only experience grief because you loved.”

    In this episode, we explore:

    β€’ Grieving a parent and carrying that relationship forward
    β€’ Men, vulnerability, counseling, and emotional health
    β€’ Separating your identity from your career
    β€’ Responding instead of reacting to life's challenges
    β€’ Raising emotionally aware children
    β€’ Turning loss into legacy
    β€’ The story behind Carl’s I Can Breathe

    πŸ“– Carl’s book: I Can Breathe β€” available on Amazon

    πŸ”— Connect with Carl: LinkedIn and Instagram

    πŸ’¬ Continue the conversation:
    https://grief2growth.substack.com

    What part of Carl’s story resonated with you? Join us on Substack and share your experience with the Grief 2 Growth community.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    29 September 2026, 3:00 pm
  • 47 minutes 15 seconds
    Preserving the Memories of Those You Love- with Alexander Josephson | EP 507

    What if the memories of someone you love had a real place to live, and you could walk through them whenever you needed to?

    In this episode, I talk with architect Alexander Josephson about how to preserve memories of a loved one, and why grief may be something you move through rather than something you get over.

    Alexander is the founder of Partisans, an award-winning design studio in Toronto. While sitting in a hospital room with his father, he listened to him dictate what he wanted on his tombstone, and realized a name and two dates were far too small for the story. That moment led him to build Cumulus, a living digital memorial you can add to, share with family, and return to for years.

    I also talk about my daughter Shayna, who passed in 2015, and why I have never wanted her to be tied to one location. If you carry the fear that someone you love will be forgotten, or you have wondered where they are now, this conversation is for you.

    In this episode, you'll discover:

    ✨ Why the "three deaths" idea makes community and storytelling so important
    ✨ How a $3 million tomb that was never built became a living, breathing memorial
    ✨ Why the body is temporary and the memories are what carry meaning
    ✨ How one family invited 90 people into a shared cloud, with pins from a golf course in Scotland to the middle of the Atlantic
    ✨ Why cemeteries can feel so disorienting, and where our loved ones are
    ✨ How a digital stone at a grave can bring their story to you with a tap of your phone

    About Alexander Josephson:
    Alexander Josephson is an architect and the founder of Partisans, an award-winning design studio in Toronto. He is also the founder of Cumulus, a digital memorial platform designed to hold the photos, stories, voices, and memories of the people we love. He is a new father to two daughters under two, and he is already making time capsules for them in his own Cumulus.

    Links and resources:
    Cumulus website: https://cumulus.world
    Cumulus Companion app: search "Cumulus Companion" in the App Store or Google Play
    Instagram: Cumulus World
    Try Cumulus free on the app or the website.

    Join the conversation:
    Read the companion article and share your thoughts at https://grief2growth.substack.com

    What resonated with you? Tell me in the comments:
    πŸ’œ Who do you want to make sure is remembered, and what story would you want to keep?
    πŸ’œ When you think of your loved one, where do you feel them?
    πŸ’œ What is one memory you could add to a shared space today?

    If this episode touched you, please share it with someone who is carrying a loss, and subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

    – – – Let's Connect: – – –

    πŸ”— All my links: https://pages.grief2growth.com/profile
    πŸ”— Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/grief2growth
    πŸ‘› Tip jar: https://www.grief2growth.com/tipjar
    πŸ“° Email list: https://pages.grief2growth.com/join-the-club
    ⏰ Free consult: https://grief2growth.as.me/30-minute-consult

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    24 September 2026, 5:00 pm
  • 1 hour 5 minutes
    Grief Stored in the Body: Dr. Karyn Shanks on Why Illness Isn't a Failure | EP 506

    What if your body isn't broken β€” it's trying to tell you something?

    In this episode of Grief 2 Growth, Brian sits down with Dr. Karyn Shanks, a physician who spent over 40 years learning what medical school never taught her β€” including from her own chronic illness journey. Together, they explore why grief and trauma get physically stored in the body, why our medical system struggles to treat chronic illness, and why feeling truly seen may matter more to healing than any prescription.

    About Dr. Karyn Shanks:
    Karyn Shanks, MD is a physician-healer-teacher-writer based in Iowa City, board-certified in Internal Medicine and Functional Medicine. After her own decades-long journey through Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and Lyme encephalitis, she founded the Unbroken Academy and developed a framework built on epigenetics, neuroplasticity, systems-based functional medicine, and transformational psychology. She's trained in Dr. Gabor MatΓ©'s Compassionate Inquiry, and is the author of UnBroken: Reclaim Your Wholeness and HEAL: A Nine-Stage Roadmap to Recover Energy.

    πŸ”— Website: karynshanksmd.com

    Key topics covered:

    • Why grief is a "huge part of the human experience" that shows up physically in the body
    • Karyn's own health journey β€” from unexplained fatigue to an Ehlers-Danlos diagnosis to recovering from Lyme encephalitis
    • Why Western medicine excels at acute, catastrophic care but struggles with chronic illness
    • Epigenetics and neuroplasticity β€” why your biology isn't fixed
    • The placebo effect as proof of the mind's power to heal the body
    • What Compassionate Inquiry (Gabor MatΓ©'s framework) taught Karyn about trauma and self-compassion
    • Why grief gets "stored in the body" and has to be worked through, not medicated away
    • Why we're ashamed of grief, and how "get back to work" culture cuts healing short
    • Reframing illness as wisdom and communication, not failure or fault

    πŸ’¬ What resonated with you? Head over to grief2growth.substack.com to share your thoughts and continue the conversation.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    22 September 2026, 3:00 pm
  • 1 hour 4 minutes
    Grieving Your Old Self After A Diagnosis with Loni Fagel | EP 505


    What happens when the person you used to be doesn't exist anymore β€” not because they died, but because a diagnosis, a surgery, or a health crisis rewrote who you are? In this episode, Loni Fagel joins me to talk about a grief almost nobody names: the grief of losing yourself while you're still here.

    Loni knows this from both sides of the therapy room. A genetic cancer mutation, a mysterious chronic illness, and a health crisis that landed her at Mayo Clinic didn't just interrupt her graduate studies in psychology β€” they became the reason she does this work at all. We talk about her "D-Day" framework for naming the moment a diagnosis changes everything, why medical trauma is as much about what comes after the event as the event itself, and why people are so often invalidated by the very doctors meant to help them.

    We also get into some of the tools Loni uses with clients: externalizing an illness by giving it its own name, expressive arts as a way to process what words can't touch, and why "post-traumatic growth" doesn't mean pretending the hard part didn't happen.

    About Loni Fagel
    Loni Fagel is a licensed professional clinical counselor, EMDRIA-approved consultant, expressive arts therapist, children's book author, and international speaker specializing in medical trauma, grief, and identity loss. Her work is shaped by her own experience with a genetic cancer mutation and a health crisis that upended her life and career.

    • Website: lonifagel.com
    • Instagram/social: @loni_fagel
    • LinkedIn: search Loni Fagel

    In this episode, we cover:

    • Why illness and diagnosis create a real, nameable grief
    • The "D-Day" framework for marking when everything changed
    • Why medical trauma isn't about the event β€” it's about everything after
    • Learning to advocate for yourself when doctors dismiss your symptoms
    • Grieving a double mastectomy and genetic cancer risk
    • Invisible illness and the cruelty of judging what you can't see
    • Naming your illness to protect your identity ("is this you, or is this Patricia?")
    • Making meaning without needing to believe "everything happens for a reason"
    • Finding the glimmers of light in the middle of a health crisis

    We want to hear from you: Have you ever grieved a version of yourself you didn't expect to lose? What resonated most with you in this conversation? Drop a comment β€” we read every one.

    Continue the conversation at grief2growth.substack.com.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    15 September 2026, 2:00 pm
  • 1 hour 1 minute
    Spirit Guides vs. Angels What's The Difference? with Michael McAdams | EP 504

    What if the "guardian angel" you've prayed to and the "spirit guide" you've been told to fear are the exact same presence, just described through a different lens?

    In this episode, Brian sits down with Michael McAdams β€” a man raised in a family soaked in Pentecostal conviction who discovered he had the gift of psychometry, the ability to receive information simply by holding an object. Michael shares the story of his mother, Wilma Jean Jones, a devout Christian who sat down at her typewriter in 1977 and began receiving dictated messages from what she called "spirit teachers." Those sessions continued for 22 years and became the book An Angel Told Me So.

    This conversation goes places you might not expect from two men raised in the church: the real story behind the money changers in the temple, why the Salem witch trials might have been genuine spiritual communication mistaken for evil, how the Urantia Book lines up with the Bible's account of Jesus, and why fear has been used for centuries to keep people from trusting their own spiritual experiences.

    About Michael McAdams
    Michael McAdams grew up in the Cincinnati area in a family steeped in Pentecostal faith β€” his uncle was a preacher who planted churches across three states, and his grandmother entered ministry convinced God spoke directly into her heart. Michael discovered his own gift of psychometry as a young man, and later helped his mother recognize and record the messages she was receiving from spirit teachers. He is the author of An Angel Told Me So and runs spiritspeaks.com, where he offers free preview messages from the upcoming second volume.

    • 🌐 Website: spiritspeaks.com
    • πŸ“– An Angel Told Me So (Volume One) β€” available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and through Ingram at independent bookstores

    Key Topics Covered

    • Growing up Pentecostal and the questions neither of them could shake
    • What psychometry is and how Michael developed the ability
    • How Wilma Jean began receiving channeled messages β€” and the confirmation message that convinced her to publish them
    • The Urantia Book and its account of the life of Jesus
    • Why the Bible's history and politics matter for understanding what it actually says
    • Fear as a tool of control in organized religion
    • How to protect your mind while opening it β€” establishing a spiritual "filter"
    • Practical advice for recognizing your own spirit guidance
    • Reincarnation, "graduation" instead of death, and what may come next

    What resonated with you? Drop a comment below β€” we'd love to hear whether this reframes anything about your own faith journey, or if you've had experiences like Michael's you've never shared before.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    12 September 2026, 1:00 pm
  • 47 minutes 8 seconds
    What My Mother's Deathbed Visions Taught Me About What Comes Next | Alexandra Grabbe | EP 503

    What if the strangest moments at the end of life are actually the most meaningful?

    In this episode, Alexandra Grabbe joins Brian to talk about the seven months she spent caring for her 96-year-old mother, Bea, at home β€” and the deathbed visions that changed how she understands what happens when we die. Alexandra shares the exhaustion, the tenderness, and the moments of unexpected grace that shaped her new memoir, Seeing Joy. If you've ever cared for a dying parent, sat with someone in their final days, or wondered what those "hallucinations" near the end of life really mean, this conversation will stay with you.

    About Alexandra Grabbe

    Alexandra Grabbe has lived many lives β€” talk show host in Paris, eco-friendly innkeeper on Cape Cod, and lifelong writer. After graduating from Vassar College, she raised three children in France, worked in journalism and broadcasting, and assisted literary figures Barbara Chase-Riboud and Marge Piercy. For two decades she ran a green bed-and-breakfast in Wellfleet, Massachusetts. When her mother's health declined, Alexandra became her full-time caregiver β€” an experience that became the caregiving blog "By B's Bedside" and, nearly two decades later, her home care memoir Seeing Joy: A Story of Life, Death, and What Comes Next (Koehler Books, March 2026).

    πŸ”— Alexandra's website: https://alexandragrabbe.com
    πŸ”— Seeing Joy at Koehler Books: https://www.koehlerbooks.com/book/seeing-joy/
    πŸ“· Instagram: @AlexandraGrabbeBooks

    In This Episode:

    • What it really means when a doctor calls something a "hallucination" and a hospice worker calls it a "visitation"
    • The physical and emotional toll of caregiving β€” and the sleep deprivation Alexandra says was the hardest part
    • Deathbed Visioning: the pattern hospice workers see again and again near the end of life
    • Why Alexandra's mother's fear of dying gave way to tea parties with deceased visitors
    • How the role reversal between parent and child reshaped their relationship
    • The 19-year journey to publish a book publishers once said was "too afraid" to touch
    • What her mother's final moments β€” and the arrival of Alexandra's father and grandmother β€” taught her about how we're not meant to be alone at the end

    What resonated with you in this episode? Have you witnessed a loved one's deathbed visions, or cared for an aging parent at home? Share your story in the comments β€” Alexandra's experience may be more common than you think.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    1 September 2026, 10:00 am
  • 1 hour 1 minute
    Why This ICU Doctor No Longer Fears Death- with Dr. Adam Rizvi | EP 502

    What does an ICU doctor see when he's present at the exact moment someone dies?

    Dr. Adam Rizvi has spent his career in critical care medicine, standing at hundreds of bedsides during life's most sacred transitions. Trained as a physician but grounded early in comparative religion, Adam has watched patients return from clinical death with vivid experiences medicine can't explain, felt rooms fill with light, and even witnessed a whirlpool of light appear at the exact moment a patient passed away β€” something his nurse saw too.

    In this conversation, we talk about what happens when a man of science makes peace with the sacred: the medical case for consciousness surviving the body, what dying patients have taught him about forgiveness, and a simple nightly practice that can change how you live starting tonight.

    About Dr. Adam Rizvi

    Dr. Adam Rizvi is a critical care physician and author of Love Does Not Know Death: Stories of Death, Dying, and the Miracles of True Forgiveness. He writes about the lessons he's learned at the bedside on his Substack, Adventures in Kindness.

    • πŸ“– Book: Love Does Not Know Death
    • ✍️ Substack: AdamRizvi.substack.com β€” Adventures in Kindness

    In This Episode, We Cover:

    • How a comparative religion major ended up in ICU medicine
    • The cardiac arrest patient who returned with a story that shouldn't have been possible
    • Why "brain as receiver" of consciousness makes more sense than "brain as generator"
    • The moment two people in the same room witnessed the same unexplainable light
    • Ancient wisdom on death β€” from the Tibetan Book of the Dead to the story of Nachiketas
    • Why forgiveness is something you do for yourself, not the person who hurt you
    • A nightly deathbed meditation practice you can start using tonight

    What Resonated With You?

    Did Adam's story about the whirlpool of light stay with you? Have you had an experience with a loved one that science couldn't explain? Share your thoughts in the comments β€” I read every one.

    If this episode moved you, head over to grief2growth.substack.com for more reflection and to connect with other listeners walking this same path.

    You've been listening. You're doing the work. But there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place.

    Maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back.Β 

    I get that. And I want you to know there's still a place for you.

    All of it, pay what you want. You decide what it's worth. Nobody gets turned away because of money.

    https://grief2g

    Want to go deeper? My Substack is where I share solo essays on grief, consciousness, and continuing bonds β€” thoughts that don't always make it into the podcast. It's also home to a community of listeners who get it, because they're living it too. Free to subscribe. Find it at substack.com/grief2growth.

    I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

    https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

    Support the show

    πŸ§‘πŸΏβ€πŸ€β€πŸ§‘πŸ» Join me on Substack- connect with others and me
    πŸ‘› Subscribe to Grief 2 Growth Premium (bonus episodes)
    πŸ“° Get A Free Gift
    πŸ“… Book A Complimentary Discovery Call
    πŸ“ˆ Leave A Review

    Thanks so much for your support

    18 August 2026, 10:00 am
  • More Episodes? Get the App