Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't

Tony Santore

An antidote to the nausea caused by life in modern society via explorations of the cast of plant species composing the "living skin" of Planet Earth.

  • 1 hour 43 minutes
    Philippine Rants
    Episodes of the Crime Pays Podcast are available Ad-Free on the Patreon at www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    In this episode we talk Philippines Botany with Jayson Mansibang and Johnny Altomonte from Philippine Taxonomic Initiative. We talk about biogeography, Nepenthes, diversity in the genus Ficus, Dacrydium,  Begonias, Dipterocarpaceae and the genus Shorea, describing new species, ultramafic areas of the Philippines, how a childhood filled with dinosaurs got us into botany, and more.

    6 April 2026, 7:01 am
  • 1 hour 17 minutes
    Back Porch Rants
    All episodes of the Crime Pays Podcast are available at www.patreon.com/Crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    Rants about saving the Borderlands Caper Tree, salvaging star cactus from a housing development in South Texas, mowing (and "dethatching") dead turf grass, vandalizing Nandina domestica in private landscaping, and more.
    31 March 2026, 10:28 pm
  • 1 hour 51 minutes
    Drought Tolerant Rants
    Ad-free episodes of The Crime pays but Botany doesn't podcast can be listened to on the Patreon at: https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
    15 March 2026, 3:31 pm
  • 2 hours 12 minutes
    Botanizing California in a 2000 Honda Civic, with Jessie Dickson
    All episodes of the Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't podcast are available - without obnoxious ads - on the Patreon at www.patreon.com/Crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    A conversation about California Native Plants with Jessie Dickson aka "Sacramento Food Forest" (he has no interest in permaculture). Jessie Dickson is responsible for stoking interest in native plants and ecosystems in quite a few thousand people who might not otherwise have any interest in it. In this episode we talk about fighting the Coyote Creek solar project, California redwoods, getting zoomers into botany, sobriety, the California deserts and much more.
    11 March 2026, 8:43 pm
  • 1 hour 46 minutes
    Missouri
    All episodes of The Crime pays podcast are available ad free on the Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
    2 March 2026, 11:08 pm
  • 2 hours 12 minutes
    Rainwater Harvesting & Plants-As-Infrastructure with Brad Lancaster


    Brad Lancaster is a guerilla tree-planter and rainwater harvester in Tucson who has been instrumental in changing the way that the city he lives in treats rainwater and street trees. He has helped covince the city of Tucson to update its own infrastructure so as to absorb - rather than waste - rainwater by using things like curb-cuts, street-side infiltration basins and native plants. In this conversation, we learn how cities in hot, arid climates can update infrastructure and use native plants to reduce flooding, keep the landscape cooler and provide a better overall quality of life for the people that live in them. This conversation is full of hope. check out the abundance of resources and diagrams on Brad's website : www.harvestingrainwater.com and neighborhoodforesters.org

    Ad-free episodes of the crime pays podcast are available on the patreon at : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    BRAD'S WEBSITES:
    HarvestingRainwater.com

    CosechaDeAguaDeLluvia.com

    NeighborhoodForesters.org




    BRAD LANCASTER'S YouTube CHANNEL:
    https://www.youtube.com/c/HarvestingRainwater


    BRAD'S BOOKS (available at deep discount direct from him):
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/shop/




    RAIN GARDEN PLANTING ZONES - and how to figure out what to plant where
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/resources/rain-garden-planting-zones/

    Urban Drool Harvesting in Los Angeles
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/2009/03/harvesting-urban-drool/


    Self-guided water tours in Tucson (in-person or virtual)
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/tour/

    Hydrologic redistribution of soil moisture by mesquites (there are better studies, but this is a start)
    https://eos.org/research-spotlights/how-mesquite-trees-gain-a-competitive-edge-in-arid-arizona

    Guerilla planting
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/2022/09/guerrilla-planting-of-rain-and-native-food-forests-vibrant-acts-of-hope-collaboration-and-letting-go/

    Before and after images of water-harvesting in our neighborhood streets:
    https://dunbarspringneighborhoodforesters.org/2022/09/before-and-after-photos-of-green-infrastructure-in-dunbar-spring-neighborhood/

    Eddy basins:
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/resource/backwater-or-eddy-basins/

    DIY curb cuts:
    https://www.harvestingrainwater.com/resource/do-it-yourself-curb-cut-guide/



    19 February 2026, 6:55 pm
  • 1 hour 58 minutes
    Ecuador Rantzzzz
    All episodes of The Crime pays podcast can be listened to ad-free on the patreon : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    16 February 2026, 7:21 pm
  • 1 hour 31 minutes
    Rants about the Texas Caper, Abuelitas Hating Nature, Asphalt Heat Islands, etc
    Ad-free episodes of the CPBBD podcast can be heard at www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    In this episode we talk about South Texas Development, remnant thorn forests surrounded by McMansions, the Asphalt Heat Island, the South Texas Caper (Quadrella incana, Caper Family - Capparaceae, Mustard Order - Brassicales), grannies that hate street trees Crime Pays fan appreciation, Fighting City Hall for native scapes, general societal ignorance regarding the living world, Jack faking his own death in order to eat more hot dogs and more.
    28 January 2026, 11:19 pm
  • 1 hour 24 minutes
    Rants about Tree Planting, the Urban Heat Island, Etc
    Ad-free episodes of the podcast can be enjoyed on the crime pays Patreon at www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

    Opening song is about Jerry Falwell.

    20 January 2026, 6:37 pm
  • 1 hour 16 minutes
    Estado de Hidalgo Rants
    Rants about the plant life of the state of Hidalgo Mexico, including but not limited to Cephalocereus senilis, Fouquieria fasciculata, Fouquieria purpusii, Magnolia scheidiana, obsidian piles, and more. 

    All episodes of The Crime Pace podcast are available for ad-free listening on the Patreon at : https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt

    Mexico Plants Checklist : https://drive.google.com/file/d/1a5GcJ39ysO_n2XbsazLZeyF9H1wDi4Zx/view?usp=drivesdk

    Diversidad Floristica Oaxaca : https://drive.google.com/file/d/1-EXwZV3FOd5sahIE2wlnUmqN_JcLC4bB/view?usp=drivesdk
    13 December 2025, 11:39 pm
  • 1 hour 12 minutes
    San Luis Potosí Rants
    In this episode we rant about cacti that grow in ephemeral lagoons, 1500 year old Montezuma Cypresses, cryptic cacti that grow in salty mud basins, Mexican Jays dispersing weeping pinion pine seeds, a fern that grows out of marble, how the summer-wet/winter-dry habit affects some carnivorous plant forms, and more...

    Reminder that episodes of this podcast are available ad-free on the Crime Pays Patreon at www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt
    5 December 2025, 3:32 am
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