Love and Abuse

Paul Colaianni

  • 32 minutes 22 seconds
    Dont call them what they really are, it will work against you

    Calling a duck a duck makes sense. But this logic works against you in the emotionally abusive relationship. Calling out an abusive person for who they are might just turn the whole thing around on you.

    14 January 2026, 9:58 pm
  • 51 minutes 30 seconds
    Total defeat and burnout in the emotionally abusive relationship

    Every relationship should have stopping points when you feel yourself slipping away. Emotional abuse operates as a slow drip-feeding of toxic behaviors that gradually erode boundaries.

    9 January 2026, 7:43 pm
  • 33 minutes 11 seconds
    When you are a captive audience to the emotionally abusive monologuer

    The endless monologue of some emotionally abusive people is a tactic that keeps you silent and submissive. It's designed to wear you down until you finally give in.

    30 December 2025, 11:19 pm
  • 53 minutes 19 seconds
    Ive stopped being abusive, let's have sex

    Some emotionally abusive people do heal. And once they do, they might feel the relationship will be great from that point on. What they don't consider is that the victim of their abusive behavior is only starting their healing process.

    4 December 2025, 6:55 pm
  • 1 hour 9 minutes
    Don't gaslight yourself into thinking you're the abuser

    The emotionally abusive relationship is confusing and draining. If you don't get a grip on what's going on, you may start to believe perhaps you are the problem and they are a saint. Let's fix that faulty thinking.

    17 November 2025, 8:48 pm
  • 33 minutes 29 seconds
    The feelings of guilt and shame after leaving the abusive person

    If you've ever questioned how to forgive yourself for choosing your own well-being over an abusive partner, you're not alone. If you're feeling guilt or shame for leaving an abusive person, this is an important episode to listen to.

    6 November 2025, 11:40 pm
  • 41 minutes 49 seconds
    Breaking the trauma bond can be hard as hell

    If you find yourself obsessively attached to someone who hurts you, is it a sign of a trauma bond? I'll tackle this challenging subject, shedding light on why you might stay in a relationship despite enduring hurtful behavior and what this could mean for your sense of self-worth and emotional well-being.

    21 October 2025, 2:22 pm
  • 45 minutes 22 seconds
    Can you heal from severe abuse while still in a severely abusive situation?

    Some people will deflect blame and make you feel like the problem. In this episode, I dive into this subject by examining a heart-wrenching story from a listener whose partner's jealousy turned violent, leaving her questioning the future of their relationship and her path to healing.

    9 October 2025, 12:01 am
  • 25 minutes 44 seconds
    Why you may not be ready to call it abuse when it is abuse

    The emotionally abusive relationship can sometimes be hard to define. How long must abusive behavior go on before actually admit that what's really happening is abuse?

    17 September 2025, 8:16 pm
  • 31 minutes 14 seconds
    Do you end the relationship because they won't?

    How do you know when it's time to instigate a split? If your partner's behavior leaves you feeling oppressed and defeated, and they refuse to change, and they also don't want to end the relationship, then what?

    3 September 2025, 11:03 pm
  • 18 minutes 19 seconds
    The breadcrumbing of relationships' past

    Breadcrumbing can be a manipulative way to keep someone in your mind so that you can't fully move forward, keeping you as a pawn in another person's game. In this episode, a person wrote to me talking about their ex, a 13-year breadcrumber!

    19 August 2025, 10:04 pm
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