- 47 minutes 58 secondsEpisode 345: Why is the Old Testament So Cavalier about Abuse of Women? feat. Dr. Helen Paynter
What do we do with Bible passages that seem to portray God as indifferent to violence against women? Sheila sits down with Dr. Helen Paynter of the Centre for the Study of Bible and Violence to explore disturbing Old Testament stories, the historical context of biblical laws, and the difference between describing violence and endorsing it. Together, they consider how reading Scripture through the lens of Jesus can help us wrestle honestly with difficult questions, take survivors' experiences seriously, and rediscover God's care for the vulnerable.
BARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Preorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Journal for the Study of Bible & Violence
- Rev. Dr. Helen Paynter’s bio
- Dr. Helen’s book on Judges 19
- Dr. Helen’s blog post on Judges 19
- Bare Marriage Podcast Episode 299 with Dr. Helen Paynter
- The Miss.Judged study on marginalized women of the Bible
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.22 October 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 50 secondsEpisode 344: Do Only Wives Have to Act Like Jesus in Marriage? (A Look at Kathy Keller)
Is Philippians 2 a biblical argument for male headship, or is it a call for ALL Christians to give up status and power in the way Jesus did? In this episode we unpack Kathy Keller’s teaching in “The Meaning of Marriage,” examining the assumptions behind complementarianism, the difference between sacrificial love and unequal authority, and what it really means to take Scripture seriously. Join us as we ask whether our ideas about gender roles reflect the upside-down kingdom of Jesus - or preserve the very power structures He came to challenge.
BARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Preorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- CBE International Paper
- N.T. Wright podcast
- Mr. Jambo reel
- The Marriage You Want, our book with a study guide, small group resources, premarital curriculum, and more!
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.15 October 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 13 minutesEpisode 343: Called to Serve - Are We Burying Women's Talents in the Ground?
What happens when women who simply want to serve Jesus keep running into barriers to ministry? First, Hannah Hunt joins us as we hear the remarkable stories behind Called to Serve. Then we talk with Dr. Adam Harbaugh about what it actually takes for churches to rethink theology, history, bylaws, and leadership structures around women in ministry. It's an episode about calling, courage, disruption, and the hopeful possibility of a church where women and men can serve side by side - with Jesus at the center.
BARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Preorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Called to Serve book
- Called to Serve website
- Called to Serve stories & podcast
- The Whole Story Sex and Puberty Course
- Dr. Adam Harbaugh’s dissertation
- Dr. Adam Harbaugh’s website
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.8 October 2026, 11:00 am - 47 minutes 19 secondsEpisode 342: Mica Miller’s Death and “The Sex Is For Men” Problem
Mica Miller’s Death and “The Sex Is For Men” Problem
The tragic Mica Miller documentary The Death of a Pastor’s Wife reveals a deeply evil pastor husband with entitled, misogynistic views about sex. But those views didn’t come out of nowhere. In this interview that Sheila did with Called to Peace Ministries, she connects the dots of how evangelical teaching around sex centers the male experience, feeds entitlement, and creates breeding grounds for abuse.
BARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTSPreorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Called to Peace Ministries
- Called to Peace on Facebook
- Called to Peace on Instagram
- The Whole Story Sex and Puberty Course
- Friday Roundup on the Miller case
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.1 October 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 12 minutesEpisode 341: What’s the Dignity Line? Feat. Dawn from The Minimal Mom
In this episode, we sit down with Dawn from The Minimal Mom to talk about the “dignity line,” a simple framework for recognizing if our relationships are characterized by respect, accountability, trust, and safety - and why patterns matter more than labels. We also dig into the complicated reality of marriage advice, boundaries, divorce, and the pressure Christian women can feel to keep trying no matter what. Then Rebecca joins in for a fiery discussion of a pastor’s sermon on sex and asking whether Christian conversations about sexual generosity actually account for women’s experiences. This week is a wide-ranging conversation about dignity, discernment, healthy relationships, and why sometimes the most important question isn’t “How do we save this marriage?” but “How do we help people become safe and whole?” This is one you don’t want to miss!
OUR SPONSOR
Thanks to Brazos Press for sponsoring this podcast, so we could tell everyone about the amazing book Look Like a Lady!
Listen to our podcast with ElissaBARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Preorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Dawn’s Website, “The Minimal Mom”
- Dawn’s Dignity Line Resources
- The Big Reasons For Divorce - Podcast Episode 212
- The Power of a Praying Wife Review - Podcast Episode 197
- Our Love & Respect Deep Dive Series
- Elissa Yukiko Weichbrodt’s book, “Look Like a Lady”
- Friday Roundup on Ryan Visconti
- Ryan Visconti full sermon
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.24 September 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 25 minutesEpisode 340: Live, Laugh, Love with Kristin Du Mez
What if many of the ideas we’ve been taught about “biblical womanhood” have a much stranger history than we realized? We sit down with historian & author Kristin Du Mez to unpack the fascinating—and sometimes surprising—story behind Christian womanhood, from Hannah Whittall Smith and Elisabeth Elliot to Christian fiction, publishing, blogging, and today’s influencer culture. What happens when we stop sanitizing the past, let go of formulas that promise happiness, and make room for a faith that can actually grapple with reality? Let’s find out together!
BARE MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Preorder Fawn, Sheila's New Book
Our Spanish Site is live!CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Kristin Du Mez’s book, "Live, Laugh, Love"
- Kristin’s Website
- Kristin’s Substack
- Elissa Yukiko Weichbrodt’s website
- Elissa’s book, “Look Like a Lady”
- The Whole Story
- Holding It Together: How Women Became America’s Safety Net
- Episode 104: Jesus & John Wayne
- Katharine Bushnell Episode
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.17 September 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 19 minutesEpisode 339: Look Like a Lady--the 5 Visual Tropes of Womanhood that Keep Us Small
What if some of the messages we've absorbed about “what it means to be a woman” have less to do with the Bible and more to do with centuries of art, culture, and storytelling? Today we have a fascinating conversation with art historian Elissa Yukiko Weichbrodt about five powerful visual tropes—the Venus, Maiden, Vessel, Mother, and Monster—and the surprising, life-giving counter-stories that have been there all along. Together, we explore what happens when we stop seeing women as objects, prizes, symbols, perfect mothers, or threats, and start seeing them as whole people invited to witness, move, create, cultivate, and partner in God's kingdom.
CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Elissa Yukiko Weichbrodt’s website
- Elissa’s book, “Look Like a Lady”
- Elissa’s Instagram
- Elissa’s Substack
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.10 September 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 2 minutesEpisode 338: What if God is Like a Mother Too? (Love Like a Mother)
What if the Bible has been giving us maternal pictures of God all along—and we've simply been overlooking them? Today we talk with Elizabeth Berget, author of “Love Like a Mother,” about God's compassion, childbirth, motherhood, grief, protection, exhaustion, and the surprising ways women's embodied experiences can illuminate the character of God. Together, we explore how seeing God as both Father and Mother can offer women a deeper sense of belonging, challenge unhealthy ideas about motherhood and spiritual performance, and invite the church into a fuller, more expansive theology.
CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Elizabeth Berget’s Website
- Elizabeth’s book, “Love Like a Mother”
- Elizabeth’s Substack
- Elizabeth’s Instagram
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.3 September 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 1 minuteEpisode 337: Why Do Evangelicals Ask Women to Do Such Risky Things if They Say They Protect Women?
What happens when “protecting women” actually leaves them with fewer choices, less financial security, and nowhere to go when a marriage becomes unsafe? Today we unpack the hidden risks behind certain conservative Christian teachings about gender, money, work, and submission before sitting down with Sally Hope to talk about abuse, faith, anger, healing, and her survivor resource "No Visible Scars." It’s a thoughtful - and occasionally fiery - conversation about what genuine protection looks like when the goal is not female dependence, but healthy partnership, autonomy, justice, and healing.
CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
GET NO VISIBLE SCARS here
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- CortneyGetsFit TikTok
- Dynamics of Abusive Relationships Study
- Sally Hope’s Website
- Sally’s book “No Visible Scars”
- Sally’s Always Hopeful program
- Download the One-Sheet on The Empowered Wife
- Bare Marriage ToolKit
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.27 August 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 51 minutesEpisode 336: The Problems with The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle
Bethany Jantzi and Dr. Merry Lin join us in taking a very close—and occasionally incredulous—look at Laura Doyle’s The Empowered Wife, unpacking its promises, “six intimacy skills,” and insistence that women can transform their marriages by changing themselves. They explore where self-care, respect, vulnerability, and intimacy can sound appealing while still becoming dangerous when they encourage women to self-silence, ignore serious problems, or take responsibility for a husband’s behavior. Ultimately, this is a conversation about discernment: what does genuine marital intimacy actually require, and how can we tell the difference between healthy accommodation and simply learning to disappear inside a relationship? It’s a longer one, but 100% worth the listen!
CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- One-Sheet on Laura Doyle’s “The Empowered Wife”: https://baremarriage.com/2026/08/the-problems-with-the-empowered-wife-by-laura-doyle-a-review-with-download/
- Bethany Jantzi’s Website: freefromcontrol.ca
- Dr. Merry Lin’s Website: https://www.drmerry.com/
- Pre-Order Sheila & Dr. Merry’s new book “Fawn”
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.20 August 2026, 11:00 am - 1 hour 5 minutesEpisode 335: If Men Are Leaders...Why Do They Need Women to Fix Them?
What happens when “Christlike manhood” starts sounding suspiciously like Victorian gender roles, male entitlement, and a whole lot of covert nudging? This rage-read of Eric Ludy’s “Warrior Poet Manhood” article unpacks the deeper assumptions behind a theology that tells women to manage, encourage, and even manipulate men into becoming better husbands while men remain in charge. We explore gender stereotypes, power and emotional attunement, the “angel in the house,” and why the upside-down kingdom of Jesus offers a radically different picture of maturity, partnership, and servant leadership.
CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT
We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.
Find the church info page here!
TO SUPPORT US:
- Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
- And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
- Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
- Join our email list!
LINKS MENTIONED:
- Eric Ludy’s full article
- Zach Wagner’s book, “Men of Virtue”
- Emerson Eggerichs podcast episode
- Love & Respect 3-Part Docuseries
- Socioeconomic Status Study
- The Marriage You Want book & Study Guide
- Pre-Order Sheila’s new book “Fawn”
Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:- The Great Sex Rescue
- She Deserves Better
- The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
- and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.13 August 2026, 11:00 am - More Episodes? Get the App